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(Politico) Silly "Barack Hussein Obama is the nation's first hip president." Only if you ignore the fact that Thomas Jefferson could freestyle rap and Grover Cleveland was a pimp with the ladies   (politico.com) divider line 83
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NikolaiFarkoff [TotalFark] 2009-04-24 11:23:32 AM  
No he's not. He's just doing the stuff everyone else wanted to do, but their preceding media image did not allow it (due in part to his disclosure and admissions in his books). ie, he can get away with it.

 
ElPresidente [TotalFark] 2009-04-24 11:28:10 AM  
Grover Cleveland was a pimp with the ladies

He certainly was - and on non-consecutive occasions to boot.

 
sepuku2 [TotalFark] 2009-04-24 11:29:29 AM  
As you're striving to find the right road,
There's one thing you should know:
What's hip today might become passe'.

What is hip? Tell me tell me if you think you know.
What is hip? And if you're really hip, the passing years would show
That you into a hip trip. Maybe hipper than hip.
WHAT IS HIP?

Think about it y'all!

 
kronicfeld [TotalFark] 2009-04-24 11:34:13 AM  
Uh, Bill Clinton wasn't?

 
DarthBrooks [TotalFark] 2009-04-24 11:53:47 AM  
www.topbrandcigars.com

Jack Kennedy just called.
He says Fark You.

 
JerseyTim [TotalFark] 2009-04-24 11:59:05 AM  
I know it's nice to finally have a president that isn't embarrassing, but the guy is a dork.
latimesblogs.latimes.com

 
DarthBrooks [TotalFark] 2009-04-24 12:00:34 PM  
www.stjames-cathedral.org

T.R. would love to chat with you, but he's got to break three horses this morning and drop a lion from 200 yards with a single shot. Then it's off to Havana, baby.

 
Etchy333 [TotalFark] 2009-04-24 12:17:16 PM  
farm4.static.flickr.com

John Adams got'em all beat.

 
rikdanger [TotalFark] 2009-04-24 12:29:03 PM  
I don't care if he's hip or nerdy. Just do a good farking job, please.

 
hillbillypharmacist [TotalFark] 2009-04-24 12:33:53 PM  
i291.photobucket.com

 
DjangoStonereaver [TotalFark] 2009-04-24 12:39:34 PM  
images2.wikia.nocookie.net

"Often they asked me 'Ben, are you sorry you never got to be
President'? 'biatch', I replied, 'Why do you think my picture's on
the hundred dollar bill!'"

 
The Dreaded Rear Admiral [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-04-24 12:42:06 PM  
207.199.174.56

 
RevMercutio [TotalFark] 2009-04-24 12:42:10 PM  
kronicfeld: Uh, Bill Clinton wasn't?

DarthBrooks: Jack Kennedy just called.
He says Fark You.


JerseyTim: I know it's nice to finally have a president that isn't embarrassing, but the guy is a dork.

All of these.

 
Tripp Johnston Private Eye 2009-04-24 12:43:07 PM  
DarthBrooks: T.R. would love to chat with you, but he's got to break three horses this morning and drop a lion from 200 yards with a single shot punch. Then it's off to Havana, baby.


Do not taunt Teddy's awesomeness with the ridiculous claim he had to use a firearm.

 
wolvernova 2009-04-24 12:44:58 PM  
I wouldn't call him hip. He's a policy/legal nerd. That's not to say he doesn't have a good sense of humor, but not hip.

 
PirateKing 2009-04-24 12:45:14 PM  
pirateking.net

 
IamSpartacus 2009-04-24 12:46:08 PM  

 
Tat'dGreaser [TotalFark] 2009-04-24 12:46:18 PM  
Yea, he's about as hip as this guy

i126.photobucket.com

 
Rapmaster2000 2009-04-24 12:46:24 PM  
It's so hip that school kids in Albany, N.Y., coined a term for it: "Baracking." And it doesn't stop there. Those in the know at Albany High greet each other by saying: "What's up, my Obama?" and they respond to a sneeze with "Barack you." Misbehavior is peer-corrected with the admonition, "Barack's in the White House," which translates, "Show some respect."

The kid who told you this is laughing his ass off that you actually believed him.

 
Swampthing in Korea 2009-04-24 12:47:36 PM  
I would just like to echo the view that Teddy Rosevelt is the most AWESOME President of all time.

Dude was a cowboy, a cavalry-man, took a bullet in the chest and STILL continued his speech.

Take that, Barack Von Bam-Bam.

 
Tripp Johnston Private Eye 2009-04-24 12:48:23 PM  
Rapmaster2000: It's so hip that school kids in Albany, N.Y., coined a term for it: "Baracking." And it doesn't stop there. Those in the know at Albany High greet each other by saying: "What's up, my Obama?" and they respond to a sneeze with "Barack you." Misbehavior is peer-corrected with the admonition, "Barack's in the White House," which translates, "Show some respect."

The kid who told you this is laughing his ass off that you actually believed him.


Oh, those negroes and their ebonics.

 
epoc_tnac 2009-04-24 12:49:03 PM  
"Hip" is a relative term. Compared to the pasty white men who've never done a real days work in their life who usually run the show, I guess he's hip. Compared to most people under the age of 30, not hip.

 
Bloody William 2009-04-24 12:49:23 PM  
Rapmaster2000: It's so hip that school kids in Albany, N.Y., coined a term for it: "Baracking." And it doesn't stop there. Those in the know at Albany High greet each other by saying: "What's up, my Obama?" and they respond to a sneeze with "Barack you." Misbehavior is peer-corrected with the admonition, "Barack's in the White House," which translates, "Show some respect."

The kid who told you this is laughing his ass off that you actually believed him.


Hilariously this. Wasn't there a (very, very) old Doonesbury plot when they were still in Walden, and Zonker was taking Roland Hedley around campus and completely making up things about student life just to fark with him?

/Yes, I realize the strip was probably printed before I was born.

 
bad_ed 2009-04-24 12:49:29 PM  
Chester Arthur was a party animal.

/Grover Cleveland was one of our greatest presidents.

 
NeverDrunk23 2009-04-24 12:49:42 PM  
JerseyTim: I know it's nice to finally have a president that isn't embarrassing, but the guy is a dork.

Didn't he make a reference to 'All you base are belong to us' at one point?

 
frustratedgenius 2009-04-24 12:50:18 PM  
The alternative is John McCain, the nation's first 'replaced hip' president.

 
Random Guy 2009-04-24 12:51:13 PM  
Swampthing in Korea: I would just like to echo the view that Teddy Rosevelt is the most AWESOME President of all time.

Dude was a cowboy, a cavalry-man, took a bullet in the chest and STILL continued his speech.

Take that, Barack Von Bam-Bam.


T.R. was so awesome he scares Chuck Norris.

 
Donald_McRonald 2009-04-24 12:51:41 PM  
Rapmaster2000: It's so hip that school kids in Albany, N.Y., coined a term for it: "Baracking." And it doesn't stop there. Those in the know at Albany High greet each other by saying: "What's up, my Obama?" and they respond to a sneeze with "Barack you." Misbehavior is peer-corrected with the admonition, "Barack's in the White House," which translates, "Show some respect."

The kid who told you this is laughing his ass off that you actually believed him.


Stop harshing my realm, cob nobbler.

 
Doctor Funkenstein [TotalFark] 2009-04-24 12:52:34 PM  
frustratedgenius: The alternative is John McCain, the nation's first 'replaced hip' president.

*insert applause*

 
vernonFL [TotalFark] 2009-04-24 12:52:53 PM  
The 'cool capital' of the USA isn't Brooklyn or Miami or Austin.

Its Albany.

 
Bloody William 2009-04-24 12:54:08 PM  
vernonFL: The 'cool capital' of the USA isn't Brooklyn or Miami or Austin.

Its Albany.


The top two past-times in Albany are crystal meth and farking with reporters.

 
JesterJames 2009-04-24 12:54:32 PM  
Tripp Johnston Private Eye: DarthBrooks: T.R. would love to chat with you, but he's got to break three horses this morning and drop a lion from 200 yards with a single shot punch. Then it's off to Havana, baby.


Do not taunt Teddy's awesomeness with the ridiculous claim he had to use a firearm.


He also has to get shot in the chest and give a speech before going to the hospital (good 'shop opportunity -- TR as Terminator).

Also,

frustratedgenius: The alternative is John McCain, the nation's first 'replaced hip' president.

Nice.

 
LonMead 2009-04-24 12:54:33 PM  
Another hip President...
threetreesstudios.com

So cool, you could store meat in him for a month.
So hip, he trouble seeing over his pelvis.

One froody dude.

Also, invented the Pan-Galactic GargleBlaster.
Named Worst Dressed Sentient Being in Known Space seven years in a row!

"Zaphod's just zis guy, you know?" says his personal brain care specialist, Gag Halfrunt.

 
Frank N Stein 2009-04-24 12:54:44 PM  
He wasn't President, but Ben Franklin farked the French more than the Nazi blitzkrieg

 
Shaggy_C 2009-04-24 12:55:08 PM  
vernonFL: The 'cool capital' of the USA isn't Brooklyn or Miami or Austin.

Its Albany.


I thought that was the 'hipster' capital. Basically, when all of the emo/goth/punk/vampyr kiddies hit college they start wearing black band shirts instead of black weirdo fishnets and all morph into a singular 'screw the world but I enjoy my rich parents money' entity.

 
Tripp Johnston Private Eye 2009-04-24 12:56:27 PM  
Even though he's not particularly badass, I wouldn't have liked to get in a fight with Ford.

Or Eisenhower, for that matter.

 
Yamaneko2 2009-04-24 12:56:31 PM  
He is a bit of a geek. An excellent President so far, not bad-looking, but a geek. If playing basketball makes you cool, then rural Indiana is the world capital of hipness. Forget clubbing in New York, the paps will be surrounding the Hilltop Tavern in Morocco, Indiana.

 
Donald_McRonald 2009-04-24 12:56:34 PM  
frustratedgenius: The alternative is John McCain, the nation's first 'replaced hip' president.

Stop your jabber-jawing.
groverclevelandfans.com

 
The Dreaded Rear Admiral [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-04-24 12:56:49 PM  
Swampthing in Korea: I would just like to echo the view that Teddy Rosevelt is the most AWESOME President of all time.

Dude was a cowboy, a cavalry-man, took a bullet in the chest and STILL continued his speech.

Take that, Barack Von Bam-Bam.


ilambiquated: What about Andy Jackson?

This (to Andrew Jackson).

When the 1828 election rolled around, a lot of people were terrified when they heard Andrew "Old Hickory" Jackson was running. If you're wondering how a guy we're calling a bad ass got such a lame nickname, it's because he used to carry a hickory cane around and beat people senseless with it, and if you're wondering why he did that, it's because he was a farking lunatic.

Former Democratic Senator and Secretary of the Treasurey Albert Gallatin feared a Jackson presidency because of his "habitual disregard of laws and constitutional provisions." Or in other words, the man was a loose canon--17th Century Washigton's answer to Martin Riggs. Sure, he probably didn't have an irate black lieutenant to answer to, or a weary partner who was too old for this shiat, but he most certainly had a death wish.

How do we know? Well, despite everyone's best efforts, Jackson was elected to the top office, and when he wasn't busy shaping the Presidency as we know it today, you could find him out back dueling. In case you haven't been to the 18th century lately, this unmanly sounding activity actually involves standing across from an armed man and shooting at him while he in turn shoots at you. The number of duels that Jackson took part in varies depending on what source you consult; some say 13, while others rank the number somewhere in the 100's, both of which are entirely too many times for a reasonable human being to stand in front of someone who is trying to kill them with a loaded gun.

On one occasion, he challenged a man named Charles Dickinson to a duel, (the reason behind it wasn't important, not to us and certainly not to Jackson), and Jackson was even kind enough to give Dickinson the first shot. We're gonna go ahead and repeat that: In a duel with pistols, Jackson politely volunteers to be shot at first. Dickinson happily obliged and shot Jackson, who proceeded to shake it off like it was a bee sting. When Jackson returned the favor, Dickinson was not so lucky, and that's why his face isn't on the twenty. The bullet, by the by, remained in Jackson's body for 19 years because, we assume, Jackson knew that time spent removing the bullets would just fall under the general category of "time not dueling," Jackson's least favorite category.

Greatest Display of Badassedry:
Andrew Jackson was the first president on whom an assassination attempt was made. A man named Richard Lawrence approached Jackson with two pistols both of which, for some reason, misfired. With the possibility of an assassination taken off the table, Jackson proceeded to beat Lawrence near death with his cane until Jackson's aides pulled him off the assassin.

The guns were inspected afterwards and it was discovered that they were in perfect working order, leading some historians to believe that it was an odds-defying "miracle" that Jackson survived, while we're pretty sure that the bullets, like everyone else, were simply scared of Jackson.


Most Badass Quote:
"I have only two regrets: I didn't shoot Henry Clay and I didn't hang John C. Calhoun."

That's right. In a life rich with murdering people for little-to-no reason, Jackson's only regret was that he didn't kill quite enough people. People like Calhoun who, it should be noted, was Jackson's vice president.

Cracked article. (pops)

 
Spanky_McFarksalot 2009-04-24 12:58:00 PM  
Well, until he's snorted coke off a whores ass, that title will still belong to W jr. II

 
DarnoKonrad 2009-04-24 12:59:20 PM  
During his first 100 days as president of the United States, Barack Obama revealed how different he is from all the white men who preceded him in the Oval Office,

And it's not even on Wonkette.

 
Swampthing in Korea 2009-04-24 12:59:22 PM  
Random Guy: Swampthing in Korea: I would just like to echo the view that Teddy Rosevelt is the most AWESOME President of all time.

Dude was a cowboy, a cavalry-man, took a bullet in the chest and STILL continued his speech.

Take that, Barack Von Bam-Bam.

T.R. was so awesome he scares Chuck Norris.


Dude was university educated, and THEN became a cowboy.

He fought a war in his late thirties.

Seriously, this dude is my hero.

 
carrion_luggage 2009-04-24 01:01:39 PM  
The OG:

portrait.kaar.at

Don't call it a comeback
I been here for years
Rockin my peers and puttin Hessians in fear
Makin the tears rain down like a MON-soon
Listen to the cannons go BOOM

 
A Dark Evil Omen 2009-04-24 01:01:43 PM  
www.daveweb1a.com

I'M THE PRESIDENT OF ROCK
THERE IS NONE HIGHER
SUCKER MCS
SHOULD CALL ME MR. JEFFERSON
AS I HAVE NO AMBITION TO GOVERN MEN

 
Hoopy Frood 2009-04-24 01:01:48 PM  
JFK dropped acid in the White House and nailed Marilyn Monroe. That's a perma-win as far as hipness goes.

 
vonschiller 2009-04-24 01:02:09 PM  
static.tvguide.com

Covered this topic months ago.

 
randomjsa 2009-04-24 01:03:47 PM  
JerseyTim: I know it's nice to finally have a president that isn't embarrassing, but the guy is a dork.

Bowing to the King of Saudi Arabia and running around telling the world it's great and the United States is terrible, getting friendly with our enemies... No sir, none of these things are embarrassing to watch.

This is of course when somebody isn't telling us what Obama meant to say when he isn't just giving a prepared speech.

 
Tripp Johnston Private Eye 2009-04-24 01:03:58 PM  
Hoopy Frood: JFK dropped acid in the White House and nailed Marilyn Monroe. That's a perma-win as far as hipness goes.


Did he kill any lions with his bear hands?

Teddy boy is still king.

 
Almet 2009-04-24 01:05:34 PM  
randomjsa: JerseyTim: I know it's nice to finally have a president that isn't embarrassing, but the guy is a dork.

Bowing to the King of Saudi Arabia and running around telling the world it's great and the United States is terrible, getting friendly with our enemies... No sir, none of these things are embarrassing to watch.

This is of course when somebody isn't telling us what Obama meant to say when he isn't just giving a prepared speech.


Shut up randomjsa, you cock.

 
LonMead 2009-04-24 01:07:09 PM  
There's a certain cool in modesty, as well...
wiki.monticello.org

Notice anything significant missing?

/just didn't think the Presidency was any big deal

 
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