who's going to push all that shiatty exercise equipment at 310am?

It's better to keep your mouth shut and have everyone think you're a badass, than to open it and have everyone realize you're a farking loon.

Subby: Chuck Norris for President of Texas

I have no problem with this. Two birds with one stone.

Little pipsqueek can't run fast enough on his tiny little legs.

I happened to be browsing in a bookstore and saw his book "Black Belt Patriotism: How to Reawaken America". I paged thru it for a bit. farking right-wing whack job.

Chuck Norris is an old, broken douche nozzle, and I would say that to his face.

/Then I would floor it.

Cewley: who's going to push all that shiatty exercise equipment at 310am?

Brinkmanship.

Chuck, I sincerely hope the zombie corpses of Bruce Lee and LBJ come back to stuff your whack-job pin-head up a longhorn's ass.

-Yours truly,
-Eddie.

Because nothing says honesty like phony hair and artificial hair coloring.

with people like him,bachmann,joe the attention whore and Beck representing the party it's clear they aren't going to try to attract moderates. just hang onto the faithful harder.

I can't believe I found a 2nd reason today to post this. Wow.

"When you're in TX, look behind you, 'cuz that's where the Ranger's gonna be"

I'm voting for Hollywood Henderson.

Stupid is often its own punishment.

Texas secession? Sounds fun. Maybe when the war is over, there will be fewer stupid people there.

Texas was independent for about 10 years I think. Along with what is now New Mexico and Oklahoma.

Wanna secede? Buh bye!

As long as they support free trade, I'm all for it. We lose them politically and still get their oil. But they have to pay us for all US Government property, instead of being like South Carolina and attacking it.

i submit this headline because it is amusing. Point of fact though Texas retained the right to revert to a sovereign nation when it became a state.

Wolf Blitzer is a Substitute Teacher: We lose them politically and still get their oil

What oil's that? I thought they squandered it all by '68...

I think he should go for it. Don't forget to make it a Theocracy.

You know damn well he'd win.

Wow,. Texas must be so proud.

jesus i'm tired of this whole "chuck norris" thing.
its not funny. i dont think its ever been funny.

All hail Cesar Chucknorious!

I don't think there is a palm nor a face big enough for what Texas has to do at some point to redeem itself.

ohpleaseohpleaseohpleaseohpleaseohpleaseohplease be true

Ender's: I don't think there is a palm nor a face big enough for what Texas has to do at some point to redeem itself.

Actually a nice hot steaming cup of STFU/GBTW would do...

whidbey: What oil's that? I thought they squandered it all by '68...

Maybe. I dunno, they still like to boast of it, I just assumed they weren't boasting about nothingness. Then again, it's Texas, so they very well could be.

I'll say it again; Chuck Norris is a douche ! The traitorous bastard should be shot.

Wolf Blitzer is a Substitute Teacher: whidbey: What oil's that? I thought they squandered it all by '68...

Maybe. I dunno, they still like to boast of it, I just assumed they weren't boasting about nothingness. Then again, it's Texas, so they very well could be.

hehe

Wolf Blitzer is a Substitute Teacher: whidbey: What oil's that? I thought they squandered it all by '68...

Maybe. I dunno, they still like to boast of it, I just assumed they weren't boasting about nothingness. Then again, it's Texas, so they very well could be probably are.

FTFY

I dare you to go to Texas and start asking people what the biggest state in the Union is. First, they'll say "You better believe it's Texas!" like it means (It's Alaska) and then hitch up their belt buckle.

"Anyone who has been around Texas for any length of time knows exactly what we'd do if the going got rough in America."

You'd run away and try to default on your responsibilities?

I feel this confirms what I said in a previous thread, that this state is the Spanish-speaking Quebec South, complete with theocratic right wing governments and culture.

"Anyone who has been around Texas for any length of time knows exactly what we'd do if the going got rough in America."

Yeah, you'd cut and run you chicken shiat !

breathe: jesus i'm tired of this whole "chuck norris" thing.
its not funny. i dont think its ever been funny.

It was funny for about twenty minutes...years ago.

IronTony: Wolf Blitzer is a Substitute Teacher: whidbey: What oil's that? I thought they squandered it all by '68...

Maybe. I dunno, they still like to boast of it, I just assumed they weren't boasting about nothingness. Then again, it's Texas, so they very well could be probably are.

FTFY

I dare you to go to Texas and start asking people what the biggest state in the Union is. First, they'll say "You better believe it's Texas!" like it means something (It's Alaska) and then hitch up their belt buckle.

hurr
/durr

Yay! I can finally call for the assassination of Chuck Norris as a secessionist and a traitor to our country!

Same for Rick Perry.

try to leave, get what you deserve.

Jesus farkin Christ. I swear to god, every day I read about some dumbshiat in this state making the news. If it's not Chuck Norris getting a blowjob by all these assholes wanting Texas to be a theocracy, then it's some asshole congress woman talking about how asians should americanize their names, or Rick Perry talking about secession. I came to this state for school, and I live in Austin so I kind of live in a bubble, so I don't really care too much about the reputation Texas gets, but I really feel bad for my friends that are smart, thoughtful, outraged native Texans.

Let them secede, then invade and occupy their land in perpetuity. Let Puerto Rico be the 50th state. Texas is farking worthless anyways, so let's treat them like we do any other place on the planet with oil and just take it from them.

Hey, Republican foreign policy as applied to the soon-to-be-independent state of Texas, right?

Also, Chuck Norris is too stupid for breath.

As Nate Silver (fivethirtyeight) says -
Texas secession means:
1)Filibuster-proof Dem Senate
2)Largest GOP advantage in any state delegation in the House is gone.
3)President Gore in 2000
4)Obama Wins electoral college 389-147
5)Football could be an Olympic sport.

So I think the GOP should be very careful.

ChickenTits: but I really feel bad for my friends that are smart, thoughtful, outraged native Texans.

I think its funny that they seem to think they get to keep all the US military personnel and hardware if they secede, not to mention any nukes.

Poor deluded Chuck

Can we please just let them go already? They want it. Everyone else wants it. Bye.

fark you Chuck Norris. You has been actor.

GardenWeasel: I think its funny that they seem to think they get to keep all the US military personnel and hardware if they secede, not to mention any nukes.

They don't? Didn't some of their taxes go to pay for it?

GardenWeasel: I think its funny that they seem to think they get to keep all the US military personnel and hardware if they secede, not to mention any nukes.

And the second they left the Union (as if it will even get that far), I think the US Government should immediately treat them like a rogue nation. Wall them off and apply sanctions.

Poopspasm: ChickenTits: but I really feel bad for my friends that are smart, thoughtful, outraged native Texans.

C'mon!! Of course Texas has it's share of 'tards--- okay, okay... more than it's share of 'tards, but there are plenty of ones with half a brain. Being a dick and stereotyping everyone in a huge state doesn't do anything for your point and only makes you look like a condescending moron. Come to Austin! I bet you'd like it.

Sarsin: GardenWeasel: I think its funny that they seem to think they get to keep all the US military personnel and hardware if they secede, not to mention any nukes.

And the second they left the Union (as if it will even get that far), I think the US Government should immediately treat them like a rogue nation. Wall them off and apply sanctions.

Unnecessary. If they secede (hint: they won't) the appropriate response is to let them go and let them have their fun, the same as should have been done with the CSA.

Their government would collapse in under a year, I promise you (just like the CSA's would have if left alone).

whidbey: GardenWeasel: I think its funny that they seem to think they get to keep all the US military personnel and hardware if they secede, not to mention any nukes.

They don't? Didn't some of their taxes go to pay for it?

They get to keep the land the bases occupy

GardenWeasel: whidbey: GardenWeasel: I think its funny that they seem to think they get to keep all the US military personnel and hardware if they secede, not to mention any nukes.

They don't? Didn't some of their taxes go to pay for it?

They get to keep the land the bases occupy

And do they get a refund for the tax money that went into producing those weapons? Shouldn't they?

/kind of bored, asking for the hell of it