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(MSNBC) NewsFlash Captain Richard Phillips freed. 3 of 4 pirates dead. Remaining pirate in custody   (msnbc.msn.com) divider line 808
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DarthBrooks [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 01:38:35 PM  
farm1.static.flickr.com
What dead pirates may look like

 
From_The_Year_2000 2009-04-12 01:39:10 PM  
It's a zombie Jesus miracle!!

 
Mentat [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 01:39:24 PM  
This be the first salvo in the Great Pirate War! Hoist the mainsail! Arrrrrrr!

 
TheOther [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 01:39:36 PM  
I want the surviving pirate to pick Lotto numbers for me; he is one lucky SOB.

 
Mentat [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 01:41:44 PM  
I wonder how it went down?

"It's, like, one of them drug dealer boats," Vic says, looking through his magic sight. "Five guys on it. Headed our way."
He fires another round. "Correction. Four guys on it."
Boom. "Correction. They're not headed our way anymore."
Boom. A fireball erupts from the ocean two hundred feet away. "Correction. No boat."

img91.imageshack.us

 
Aeonite [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 01:41:55 PM  
Ninja > Pirates.

 
Kyosuke [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 01:44:31 PM  
Mentat: I wonder how it went down?

"It's, like, one of them drug dealer boats," Vic says, looking through his magic sight. "Five guys on it. Headed our way."
He fires another round. "Correction. Four guys on it."
Boom. "Correction. They're not headed our way anymore."
Boom. A fireball erupts from the ocean two hundred feet away. "Correction. No boat."


I wonder how the US captain survives that solution.

 
Mentat [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 01:46:24 PM  
Kyosuke: I wonder how the US captain survives that solution.

Vic has very good aim.

 
arkansas [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 01:47:52 PM  
Kudos to the US Navy....kudos to the President....kudos to the US Merchant Marine. Now lets arm those ships so this does not occur again.

 
PacersJAM3s 2009-04-12 01:48:03 PM  
This will be really interesting to see what exactly happened.

If he really jumped overboard again, how the heck did he swim since he was reportedly tied up?

/Maybe some seals were in the water the whole time. Who knows, I definitely don't have the slightest clue.

 
SpinStopper [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 01:48:08 PM  
Kyosuke: I wonder how the US captain survives that solution.

Captain is secretly a ninja ;)

 
wickedg [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 01:50:09 PM  
ninjas = SEAL team>pirates
/last pirate left alive reluctantly I'm sure

 
SpinStopper [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 01:50:30 PM  
arkansas: Kudos to the US Navy....kudos to the President....kudos to the US Merchant Marine. Now lets arm those ships so this does not occur again.

No sh*t.

The other day somebody posted that it probably wouldn't be a good idea to have a ship full of armed sailors sailing into dock.

Hell, the US Navy does it all the time, and we know what US Sailors are like. I used to be one ;)

 
wickedg [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 01:51:17 PM  
Mentat: I wonder how it went down?

"It's, like, one of them drug dealer boats," Vic says, looking through his magic sight. "Five guys on it. Headed our way."
He fires another round. "Correction. Four guys on it."
Boom. "Correction. They're not headed our way anymore."
Boom. A fireball erupts from the ocean two hundred feet away. "Correction. No boat."


Holy shiat it's Hiro Protagonist

 
vossiewulf [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 01:51:45 PM  
If I had to guess, it would be SEAL swimmers popping up at close range with 5.56mm introductions to the pirates.

 
TheOther [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 01:51:57 PM  
arkansas: Now lets arm those ships so this does not occur again.

I think informal convoy is probably the most efficient interim measure.

 
MIguy [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 01:52:15 PM  
I'm guessing Navy Seals + stun grenades + cover of night = success

 
Hobodeluxe [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 01:52:52 PM  
Now don't all those gung ho people here who wanted the navy to blow them out of the water on the first day look stupid? Now we have the hostage freed and some prisoners we can interrogate. Navy SEALS rock!!

 
Pocket Ninja [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 01:53:10 PM  
SpinStopper: The other day somebody posted that it probably wouldn't be a good idea to have a ship full of armed sailors sailing into dock.

Hell, the US Navy does it all the time, and we know what US Sailors are like


Right. Because there's no difference between the crews of an oil tanker and a destroyer.

 
Lorelle [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 01:53:45 PM  
CBS Radio reported that Phillips jumped overboard and was rescued by the Navy.

 
SpinStopper [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 01:57:17 PM  
Pocket Ninja: SpinStopper: The other day somebody posted that it probably wouldn't be a good idea to have a ship full of armed sailors sailing into dock.

Hell, the US Navy does it all the time, and we know what US Sailors are like

Right. Because there's no difference between the crews of an oil tanker and a destroyer.


A couple of hours after shore leave is granted, there is. The Navy swabbies are more drunkenly organized ;)

 
WhoIsPurpleGoo [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 01:57:57 PM  
let's see...

one life boat with no fuel surrounded by 3 u.s. warships, one with navy seals.

i'm guessing the 3 dead pirates didn't even know they were being shot at when they died.

 
Weaver95 [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 01:57:59 PM  
Lorelle: CBS Radio reported that Phillips jumped overboard and was rescued by the Navy.

the problem with using human shields is that you have to keep them alive and visible in order for them to work.

 
SpinStopper [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:00:27 PM  
Weaver95: Lorelle: CBS Radio reported that Phillips jumped overboard and was rescued by the Navy.

the problem with using human shields is that you have to keep them alive and visible in order for them to work.


And keeping them with you helps, too ;)

 
Ima10urin8 [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:01:10 PM  
buckshot to the dome

 
ahwahoo2006 [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:04:06 PM  
3 lethal loads, 1 less-than-lethal load, fired simultaneously. And thats why our guys are the best.

 
Weaver95 [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:06:00 PM  
SpinStopper: Weaver95: Lorelle: CBS Radio reported that Phillips jumped overboard and was rescued by the Navy.

the problem with using human shields is that you have to keep them alive and visible in order for them to work.

And keeping them with you helps, too ;)


well yeah, that too.

 
Benevolent Misanthrope [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:08:25 PM  
Hobodeluxe: Now don't all those gung ho people here who wanted the navy to blow them out of the water on the first day look stupid? Now we have the hostage freed and some prisoners we can interrogate. Navy SEALS rock!!

One. One prisoner to interrogate. Which would be useless, because they have no information. They're pirates, not soldiers. They acted independently, I'm sure - Somalia has no government.

But blowing them all to kingdom come would be stupid, yes. I have no idea why we left one of those farkers alive.

 
SpinStopper [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:09:51 PM  
Benevolent Misanthrope: I have no idea why we left one of those farkers alive.

Entertainment ;)

 
Pesky_Humans [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:12:52 PM  
Hellz yeah! I was really hoping that this would go down like this and that the captain would be freed safely.

Here's my shot in the dark guess:
Weary captors take their eye off the ball. Captain goes swimming. SEAL team parked right outside with a Zodiac craft. Liberally apply M-60 rounds to pirate filled lifeboat. Success.

 
Fodder_4_Da_Man 2009-04-12 02:13:17 PM  
The surviving pirate better like butsecks... cuz it's a cinch he'll be getting some in a Federal PMITA prison.

 
Weaver95 [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:13:31 PM  
SpinStopper: Benevolent Misanthrope: I have no idea why we left one of those farkers alive.

Entertainment ;)


3 dead and one to be used as an example.

 
SilentStrider [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:14:30 PM  
Good to hear he's ok.

 
Mentat [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:17:26 PM  
Benevolent Misanthrope: One. One prisoner to interrogate. Which would be useless, because they have no information. They're pirates, not soldiers. They acted independently, I'm sure - Somalia has no government.

You have to keep one alive to send back as an example.

 
Weaver95 [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:17:33 PM  
Fodder_4_Da_Man: The surviving pirate better like butsecks... cuz it's a cinch he'll be getting some in a Federal PMITA prison.

Film it and air drop copies of it over his home town.

Then let him go home.

 
SilentStrider [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:18:18 PM  
Aaaand wikipedia is so predictable. Article on him is created, then 8 hours later its already up for deletion.

 
Msol [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:19:33 PM  
So much for that whole 'Going Galt' thing, eh?

 
b0rscht [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:22:21 PM  
Wow, Phillips is from tiny Underhill, VT - I have relatives who live there!

 
Weaver95 [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:22:39 PM  
Msol: So much for that whole 'Going Galt' thing, eh?

individually, those words appear to be in the english language but the way you have put them together does not make any sort of sense.

 
MissFeasance [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:22:46 PM  
USA! USA!

 
Action Replay Nick [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:26:30 PM  
This is fantastic news that transcends political disagreements. I bet even the most die-hard right-wing people cannot help but feel pride in both our country and our President for authorizing and accomplishing this mission.

Glad the captain is OK and this story has a happy ending.

 
Fodder_4_Da_Man 2009-04-12 02:27:04 PM  
SilentStrider: Aaaand wikipedia is so predictable. Article on him is created, then 8 hours later its already up for deletion.

Created: 14:12, 10 April 2009

Teh maths are not your strong suit, are they?

 
TeddyRooseveltsMustache [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:27:10 PM  
Good.

 
SilentStrider [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:27:16 PM  
Action Replay Nick: Glad the captain is OK and this story has a happy ending.

unless you're a pirate ;)

 
SilentStrider [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:27:52 PM  
Fodder_4_Da_Man: Teh maths are not your strong suit, are they?

woops, 10 hours, not 8, my bad.

 
Weaver95 [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:28:25 PM  
SilentStrider: Action Replay Nick: Glad the captain is OK and this story has a happy ending.

unless you're a pirate ;)


see, if they had themselves a Captain Barbossa hat then they'd have won.

 
Fodder_4_Da_Man 2009-04-12 02:29:01 PM  
more like 52 hours... but who's counting?

 
bmr68 [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:32:24 PM  
Good to see the politicians stayed out of the real men's way and let them do their job.

 
Weaver95 [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:32:31 PM  
Mentat: The pirates should be thankful that it was the US and not the Chinese Navy that got them. Otherwise, they might have had to swim home.

Nah. The chinese would just have had them shot.

 
Warthog [TotalFark] 2009-04-12 02:32:47 PM  
Those pirates were people. With homes. And families. And children. I weep at all the glee in this thread about the senseless murder of three human beings.

How would you feel if one of your loved ones headed off to work, 300 miles off the coast of America, and after hijacking a Somali freighter in the simple hopes of extracting a ransom to feed you and the rest of your family, was senselessly gunned down by Somali special forces in the middle of the night? I bet you'd feel sad. Really sad.

So good for you, America. You just made three pirate families really sad. I hope you're proud of yourself.

 
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