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(SeattlePI) Dumbass Your wife is nursing a 3-month-old and isn't keeping the house tidy. Do you (a) do it yourself, (b) hire a maid, or (c) slip methamphetamines in her water to "give her energy"?   (seattlepi.com) divider line 96
More: Dumbass  

96 Comments   (+0 »)


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Airfoilsguy [TotalFark] 2009-03-28 11:37:38 PM  
Approves


i230.photobucket.com

 
Gwendolyn [TotalFark] 2009-03-28 11:45:45 PM  
What a freaking tool.

 
Weaver95 [TotalFark] 2009-03-29 02:10:29 AM  
Gwendolyn: What a freaking tool.

I'll bet the woman figured something was wrong when she realized she was spending $200 a day on water.

 
Pocket Ninja [TotalFark] 2009-03-29 10:11:42 AM  
Well, if we accept that A isn't really an option, then I guess it comes down to a comparison of what it would cost to have a maid coming in every day against a daily (and presumably small) supply of meth. I'm not really sure how that breaks down, but there's got to be a pretty clear bottom line, I would think.

 
sentex [TotalFark] 2009-03-29 10:33:56 AM  
Did it work?

 
Crosshair [TotalFark] 2009-03-29 10:52:26 AM  
What a cheap ass. He couldn't spring for coke instead?

sentex: Did it work?

Am I going to hell for wondering the same thing?

 
DslainteC [TotalFark] 2009-03-29 11:19:21 AM  
He must have been hoping there would be a meth head to his madness.

 
farfigneugan [TotalFark] 2009-03-29 11:40:09 AM  
If by nursing they mean literally (I didn't RTFA), then that's insanely irresponsible towards the infant.
But then again, meth-heads aren't known for their intelligence displays.

 
skinink 2009-03-29 11:40:41 AM  
No, you get her hooked on heroin. The first taste is free, and then afterwards she doesn't get anymore unless she does some housework.

 
cbathrob 2009-03-29 11:41:00 AM  
What's his Fark handle?

 
Cybernetic 2009-03-29 11:41:09 AM  
What a classy guy. What's even better is that we know he's been reproducing, so there will be more of his special brand of idiocy in the future.

 
SwiftFox [TotalFark] 2009-03-29 11:45:39 AM  
The chances of it occurring to him to use his own excess meth energy to clean the house: zero

 
FunkOut [TotalFark] 2009-03-29 11:45:54 AM  
Nursing a baby take a lot of energy in caloric terms. Making milk burns 300 to 500 calories a day. If a mother isn't getting extra food, she's going to be pretty damn tired in addition to waking up all hours of the night.

And nursing mothers have to be careful about what they ingest because it can be passed on the child. One woman was given Tylenol 3s and her newborn died because she was one of a percentage of people (1% of Caucausians, up to 30% in Asians and Africans) who convert the codeine into morphine in their own body. The child also carried the rapid metabolization genes and died of opioid poisoning. This guy was an idiot, slipping his wife drugs and putting his child at risk.

 
phaseolus 2009-03-29 11:45:57 AM  
Argh. "Stimulation" is not the same thing as "Energy".

Sorry, this is a pet peeve for engineers.

 
the cheerleader who got away 2009-03-29 11:46:28 AM  
Might work, but the kid's going to get a dose of it via boobie-buffet and it'll be up all night. Did he get duct-tape as well or did he just not think this through?

 
tonesskin [TotalFark] 2009-03-29 11:46:49 AM  
Oh, shut up guys. What else was he supposed to do to keep her from eternal damnation?

"But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God." (I Corinthians 11:3)

"For the man is not of the woman; but the woman of the man. Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man." (I Corinthians 11:8-9)

"Let the women learn in silence with all subjection. But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression." (I Timothy 2:11-14)

"Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything." (Ephesians 5:22-24)

 
Itsallaboutme [TotalFark] 2009-03-29 11:47:12 AM  
skinink: No, you get her hooked on heroin. The first taste is free, and then afterwards she doesn't get anymore unless she does some housework.

My hero

 
Malinki 2009-03-29 11:48:43 AM  
Crosshair: sentex: Did it work?

Am I going to hell for wondering the same thing?


Save me a seat, I'm running just a bit late.

 
byzantinebobby 2009-03-29 11:48:50 AM  
Well, this is either really terrible, or really brilliant. If the kid gets some meth in it, then both have energy so both can clean. Family bonding and clean house! That, or a horrible tragedy...

 
AliasUndercover 2009-03-29 11:48:51 AM  
Did it work?

 
PizzaJedi81 2009-03-29 11:49:24 AM  
Airfoilsguy: Approves

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?

 
sumdruncomic 2009-03-29 11:49:38 AM  
I get tired just reading this story.

 
tonesskin [TotalFark] 2009-03-29 11:50:03 AM  
PizzaJedi81: Airfoilsguy: Approves

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?


"Mom, I hope dad isn't drunk today."

 
FelineMommy27 [TotalFark] 2009-03-29 11:50:12 AM  
PizzaJedi81: Airfoilsguy: Approves

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?


Nothing, you've already told her twice.

 
Oldiron_79 2009-03-29 11:50:33 AM  
Red Bull Crystal Meth, it gives you wings.

 
GonzoNihilist 2009-03-29 11:54:10 AM  
Is this the baby?

www.bongsbay.com

 
rcain [TotalFark] 2009-03-29 11:54:24 AM  
♫ Methfully -- methfully -- methfully clean, it's not fully clean till it's methfully clean ♫

 
MorseCodeNowInHiDef 2009-03-29 11:54:36 AM  
Maybe he confused the Crystal Lite with the crystal meth; I hear it happens all the time.

 
scwewywabbit 2009-03-29 11:54:39 AM  
who is Brett?

 
Akustical 2009-03-29 11:56:19 AM  
tonesskin: Oh, shut up guys. What else was he supposed to do to keep her from eternal damnation?

"But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God." (I Corinthians 11:3)

"For the man is not of the woman; but the woman of the man. Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man." (I Corinthians 11:8-9)

"Let the women learn in silence with all subjection. But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression." (I Timothy 2:11-14)

"Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything." (Ephesians 5:22-24)


0/10

 
atomic-age [TotalFark] 2009-03-29 11:57:16 AM  
FunkOut: Nursing a baby take a lot of energy in caloric terms. Making milk burns 300 to 500 calories a day. If a mother isn't getting extra food, she's going to be pretty damn tired in addition to waking up all hours of the night.

And nursing mothers have to be careful about what they ingest because it can be passed on the child. One woman was given Tylenol 3s and her newborn died because she was one of a percentage of people (1% of Caucausians, up to 30% in Asians and Africans) who convert the codeine into morphine in their own body. The child also carried the rapid metabolization genes and died of opioid poisoning. This guy was an idiot, slipping his wife drugs and putting his child at risk.


Blah blah blah.

I sincerely doubt he gives a fark about the baby or his wife. You're making the assumption that these people matter to each other.

 
atomic-age [TotalFark] 2009-03-29 11:58:10 AM  
rcain: ♫ Methfully -- methfully -- methfully clean, it's not fully clean till it's methfully clean ♫

Thank you!

 
MorseCodeNowInHiDef 2009-03-29 11:59:35 AM  
Akustical: tonesskin: Oh, shut up guys. What else was he supposed to do to keep her from eternal damnation?

"But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God." (I Corinthians 11:3)

"For the man is not of the woman; but the woman of the man. Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man." (I Corinthians 11:8-9)

"Let the women learn in silence with all subjection. But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression." (I Timothy 2:11-14)

"Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything." (Ephesians 5:22-24)

0/10


1. cock holster
A woman whose only redeeming quality is the ability to sexually gratify a male.
cock holster (new window)

 
sumdruncomic 2009-03-29 12:00:06 PM  
Sounds like a great slogan for a t-shirt:

WWWLBD?

What would William Lee Bieber do?

 
TexasPeace [TotalFark] 2009-03-29 12:00:44 PM  
She was really a user, and she convinced him to take the rap.

 
CrispFlows 2009-03-29 12:01:42 PM  
Akustical: tonesskin: Oh, shut up guys. What else was he supposed to do to keep her from eternal damnation?

"But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God." (I Corinthians 11:3)

"For the man is not of the woman; but the woman of the man. Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man." (I Corinthians 11:8-9)

"Let the women learn in silence with all subjection. But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression." (I Timothy 2:11-14)

"Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything." (Ephesians 5:22-24)

0/10


Actual bible quotes in BOTH new testament and old testament... If he's trolling using actual entries in a book that historically determined the moral code of this country - Does it mean the holy book is not valid anymore?

 
kenkire 2009-03-29 12:02:29 PM  
Great now thak kid'll be hooked on boobies all his life.

 
MorseCodeNowInHiDef 2009-03-29 12:02:41 PM  
Why do women have tits? So the water will run back into the sink.
Why do women have small feet? So their tits will hang over the sink.

 
kenkire 2009-03-29 12:05:00 PM  
kenkire: Great now thak that kid'll be hooked on boobies all his life.

/FTFM

 
FunkOut [TotalFark] 2009-03-29 12:07:02 PM  
MorseCodeNowInHiDef:
Why do women have small feet? So their tits will hang over the sink.


farm4.static.flickr.com

Peggy Hill begs to differ.

 
Pvt Joker 2009-03-29 12:07:56 PM  
Magda?!?

farm4.static.flickr.com

 
Sir Charles 2009-03-29 12:09:39 PM  
My (now-ex) wife overdosed on meth so I'm getting a kick out of these replies

/now have full custody of a 3 year old

 
radioman_ 2009-03-29 12:12:24 PM  
MorseCodeNowInHiDef Thanks to that link I now know that Wilt Chamberlain's Daily Glove is a another term for vagina. It makes sense but I'm going to have a hard time working Wilt Chamberlain's Daily Glove into the conversation without sounding like I'm reaching.

 
tonesskin [TotalFark] 2009-03-29 12:13:18 PM  
CrispFlows: Akustical: tonesskin: Oh, shut up guys. What else was he supposed to do to keep her from eternal damnation?

"But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God." (I Corinthians 11:3)

"For the man is not of the woman; but the woman of the man. Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man." (I Corinthians 11:8-9)

"Let the women learn in silence with all subjection. But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression." (I Timothy 2:11-14)

"Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything." (Ephesians 5:22-24)

0/10

Actual bible quotes in BOTH new testament and old testament... If he's trolling using actual entries in a book that historically determined the moral code of this country - Does it mean the holy book is not valid anymore?


Apparently citing books is trolling now.

 
StreetlightInTheGhetto 2009-03-29 12:15:26 PM  
Sir Charles: My (now-ex) wife overdosed on meth so I'm getting a kick out of these replies

/now have full custody of a 3 year old


I haven't heard of much meth around my town (maybe cause we're not rural and most folks are satisfied with pot and the occasional something else), but my friend 30 minutes away in a tiny village told me a lab got busted a block from his house.

I've read and heard enough to metaphorically (literally if it comes to it) biatch-slap any friend who expresses a desire to try it.

It's a bit media hysteria, but Jesus Christ, it does not seem like a pretty drug. When friends who've been around the block and have tried acid, x, coke, mushrooms, and/or heroin adamantly refuse to go anywhere near that crap, warning flags, bells, and whistles go off.

 
Epiphany 2009-03-29 12:17:19 PM  
What's the penalty for tampering with a witness? He has 51 COUNTS of it!

Also, what the fark type of jail is he in where they let him call ANYONE 51 times?

 
Egalitarian [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-03-29 12:23:17 PM  
I was in a sea-side park in Florida a few years back, having a picnic. First we saw a really nasty-looking Eminem type guy in a hoodie eyeing us with great suspicion. Then all these big SUVs drove up and a bunch of big teenage guys piled out. They all went behind a park building and came back soon after, one guy talking about how somebody else looked out for him when he was high.

I still wonder if they were buying meth or what, and which one of those well-off scions destroyed themselves with a drug addiction.

 
tonesskin [TotalFark] 2009-03-29 12:25:43 PM  
Your medical doctor, if he or she graduated in the last 10 years or so, possibly used meth during medical school. In fact, most people who try meth don't become permanent users.

Personally, I wouldn't touch the stuff, and I agree that it is a bit more than pot, but seriously it's not the devil. That is alcohol.

/mmmmm, beer!

 
bio4ema 2009-03-29 12:27:32 PM  
i was told there would be no meth

 
Slartibartfaster [TotalFark] 2009-03-29 12:28:05 PM  
tonesskin: a book that historically determined the moral code of this country

huh wha ?

Im just an immigrant, Im still learning

is there a reason the FIRST amendment is not the LAST amendment ?
Is there a reason the FIRST 5 commandments are not law ?
Is there a reason I should believe your crap ?

(say hi to Pat from me - tell him he still owes me a hooker)

 
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