If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.
Fark SearchWeb Fark

         more options... Create account

(SFGate) Silly 66-year-old has more than 1,200 gnomes in her garden. It's about time to say "gnome-ore."   (sfgate.com) divider line 73
More: Silly  
•       •       •

9592 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Mar 2009 at 8:32 PM   |  Make this a Fark FavoriteFavorite    |   share: Share on OMGTWITTER WEB2.0share on StumbleUponshare on Facebook  more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!

73 Comments   (+0 »)


Archived thread
First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
UNC_Samurai [TotalFark] 2009-03-22 05:38:31 PM  
It's just an illusion. They're good at that.

 
God Is My Co-Pirate 2009-03-22 06:17:46 PM  
It's gnome man's land.

 
baka-san [TotalFark] 2009-03-22 06:29:38 PM  
Real men have Sasquatch.

i201.photobucket.com

And he's a stars fan.

My aunts, not mine.

And his name is Willie.

 
PhiloeBedoe [TotalFark] 2009-03-22 06:42:37 PM  
It's a matter of reflected-sounds-of-underground-spirits.

 
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener [TotalFark] 2009-03-22 06:55:25 PM  
THIS IS GNOME LAUGHING MATTER, PEOPLE

 
UberDave [TotalFark] 2009-03-22 06:59:06 PM  
Unavailable for comment:

i39.tinypic.com

 
Arramol 2009-03-22 08:37:03 PM  
What does she need with 1200 desktop environments?

linuxfud.files.wordpress.com
/of course it's hotlinked

 
Englebert Slaptyback 2009-03-22 08:37:54 PM  

UberDave


Unavailable for comment:


"'E's got gno-o-omes."

"Aye, 'e bloody well would have."

 
Daemon Spooler [TotalFark] 2009-03-22 08:38:08 PM  
Or as we call them in Idaho - "targets".

 
MrGronk 2009-03-22 08:38:54 PM  
Having that many gnomes could be bad for your elf.

 
Craptastic 2009-03-22 08:39:14 PM  
baka-san: Real men have Sasquatch.



And he's a stars fan.

My aunts, not mine.

And his name is Willie.


You should buy Willie a "Warriors Warriors Warriors" shirt.

 
Cyborg77 2009-03-22 08:39:35 PM  
Step 1: Collect a ton of gnomes.

Step 2: ???

Step 3: Profit.

 
zulius 2009-03-22 08:39:41 PM  
makes gnomeregan looks like Elwynn Forest

/NTTAWWT

 
Midnight Rambler 2009-03-22 08:42:52 PM  
That is whacked, gnome-sayin'?

 
Feltonl 2009-03-22 08:43:16 PM  
I have one, he guards the back of my house with his wheelborrow of daisies. His name is gerald, and needs to be repainted badly.

 
skinink 2009-03-22 08:44:14 PM  
Arramol: What does she need with 1200 desktop environments?


To ward off all Windows users, and properly written help manuals for their linux programs.


 
mjoven1975 [TotalFark] 2009-03-22 08:45:29 PM  
I'd rather live next to a crazywoman with 1,200 gnomes than a crazy woman with 1,200 cats.

 
veale728 [TotalFark] 2009-03-22 08:48:01 PM  
*punches submitter*

 
saintstryfe 2009-03-22 08:48:27 PM  
www.warcraftpets.com

Approves.

/Loves ya Bre.

 
fernandez 2009-03-22 08:52:19 PM  
mjoven1975: I'd rather live next to a crazywoman with 1,200 gnomes than a crazy woman with 1,200 cats.

until the gnomes make off with your child

 
MadCat221 2009-03-22 08:52:24 PM  
That's a lotta ammo...

 
grinderman 2009-03-22 08:52:26 PM  
i69.photobucket.com
Gnomesquatch! Hot off the presses!

 
Hick [TotalFark] 2009-03-22 08:54:02 PM  
Hank Hill does not approve.

 
ktybear 2009-03-22 08:58:01 PM  
we have a gnome convention every Australia Day
Link (new window)

the exciting part....bringing your own gnome

/never been
//never intend to

 
NarrMaster 2009-03-22 08:59:09 PM  
Personally, I'd make an ad-hoc weapon out of a firehose nozzle, a leaf-blower, a vacuum cleaner, and some sort of conductor, load those bad boys up, and fire them hilariously upright at my enemies.

 
robohobo 2009-03-22 09:00:07 PM  
image.com.com Does NOT approve.

 
Little One-Eyed Wench 2009-03-22 09:01:22 PM  
This is our gnome

Henry the Gnomicidal maniac

i34.photobucket.com

I have him out all year long.

 
farfigneugan [TotalFark] 2009-03-22 09:06:52 PM  
zulius: makes gnomeregan looks like Elwynn Forest

/NTTAWWT


nerd ;)

MadCat221: That's a lotta ammo...

Nice.
Did you get the achievement "little rocket man" for HL2ep2?

img15.imageshack.us

Little One-Eyed Wench: I have him out all year long.

As well you should!

 
jafiwam 2009-03-22 09:10:47 PM  
I always wanted to get a couple of gnomes and cut them up to make one lying on it's belly. Then dress it up in camo and ghillie with a little .50 cal rifle.

Then sell the house and wait for the new owners to find it a year later.

 
Fano 2009-03-22 09:11:22 PM  
www.jenniferplesko.com


?????????

 
trifoldhat 2009-03-22 09:17:46 PM  
Little One-Eyed Wench: This is our gnome

Henry the Gnomicidal maniac



I have him out all year long.


That is figgin' awesome!

 
YouPeopleAreCrazy 2009-03-22 09:17:51 PM  
I have a version of this little guy:
lh4.ggpht.com

He is about to embark on a multistate photo op up and down the east coast.

 
Abox 2009-03-22 09:20:50 PM  
Nooooooooooooooooooooomes!

 
KeithMoonLives 2009-03-22 09:24:42 PM  
I can has gnome thread?

 
Fano 2009-03-22 09:25:40 PM  
Garl Glittergold Approves!

 
mynameist 2009-03-22 09:33:00 PM  
No lawn jockeys?

I am not impressed.

 
geekybroad 2009-03-22 09:35:39 PM  
3.bp.blogspot.com
???

 
Gyrfalcon [TotalFark] 2009-03-22 09:36:40 PM  
NarrMaster: Personally, I'd make an ad-hoc weapon out of a firehose nozzle, a leaf-blower, a vacuum cleaner, and some sort of conductor, load those bad boys up, and fire them hilariously upright at my enemies.

You need to stop playing Fallout 3 and get back to work.

 
Fano 2009-03-22 09:36:40 PM  
img266.imageshack.us

Amigos! Tonight we ride! For freedom!

 
Roquefort 2009-03-22 09:42:41 PM  
Is her toilet broken?

 
Nurglitch 2009-03-22 09:44:33 PM  
Or what?

 
beowulf_cluster 2009-03-22 09:49:44 PM  
It is time to install KDE

www.guidebookgallery.org

 
Kid Mojo 2009-03-22 09:49:46 PM  
*Yawn*

Wake me when her plane crashes...

 
Oldiron_79 2009-03-22 09:49:50 PM  
If garden gnomes are wrong I don't want to be right

 
blinkybluegnome 2009-03-22 09:50:06 PM  
This is indeed relevant to my interests...

 
ATLien 2009-03-22 10:07:50 PM  
BOO!!!

 
toraque [TotalFark] 2009-03-22 10:10:44 PM  
It's been a long-standing dream of mine to have a gnome army.

Say, fifty of the little ceramic suckers, a garden, and a variety of garden gnome-sized weaponry. Take the biggest gnome, call him a sergeant, and give him a special pointy hat or stripes or something. Every couple of days, move all the gnomes around, with the sergeant gnome in a prominent place, as if conducting drills.

We start with the other forty nine gnomes lined up in in parade formation. The sergeant gnome, of course, inspecting the troops. Then, under the cover of night, rearrange the gnomes to a new task: perhaps marksmanship training with tiny rifles, hand to hand training, running the obstacle course. Every couple of days, move the gnomes into a new training phase.

The last training session is, of course, stealth. Show a few gnomes, hiding under bushes. One gnome, under a flowerpot; two of them, burrowing underground, with only their pointy hats showing. One gnome, sneaking up on an unsuspecting potted plant, with gnome sized knife in hand.

On the last day, remove all the gnomes. Your neighbors will never bother you again.

 
Moonk 2009-03-22 10:15:54 PM  
came for thePratchett, got it in 5.

 
GreatNOD 2009-03-22 10:18:51 PM  
imgs.sfgate.com
i4.tinypic.com

 
Gyrfalcon [TotalFark] 2009-03-22 10:20:52 PM  
toraque: It's been a long-standing dream of mine to have a gnome army.

Say, fifty of the little ceramic suckers, a garden, and a variety of garden gnome-sized weaponry. Take the biggest gnome, call him a sergeant, and give him a special pointy hat or stripes or something. Every couple of days, move all the gnomes around, with the sergeant gnome in a prominent place, as if conducting drills.

We start with the other forty nine gnomes lined up in in parade formation. The sergeant gnome, of course, inspecting the troops. Then, under the cover of night, rearrange the gnomes to a new task: perhaps marksmanship training with tiny rifles, hand to hand training, running the obstacle course. Every couple of days, move the gnomes into a new training phase.

The last training session is, of course, stealth. Show a few gnomes, hiding under bushes. One gnome, under a flowerpot; two of them, burrowing underground, with only their pointy hats showing. One gnome, sneaking up on an unsuspecting potted plant, with gnome sized knife in hand.

On the last day, remove all the gnomes. Your neighbors will never bother you again.


You are so scary, I've already sent SWAT and the psych evaluation team to your house. The National Guard is evacuating your neighborhood. Stay calm, no one's going to hurt you, just tell the gnomes to put their weapons down and come out of the house with their hats over their heads...

 
Displayed 50 of 73 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all


[Continue Farking]