Winner of 3 Buck-eye Newshawk awards

/Been menacing me for years.

Around here it's lot lizards that case you around.

Dodes says the birds had been seen near the building for a long time but only recently turned aggressive.

If there only was an explanation for that. Like some time of the year that they become aggressive in pursuit of some tail.

Alacritous: Winner of 3 Buck-eye Newshawk awards

And the coveted Silver Sow!

grab the neck swing around, cook dinner

"As god as my witness, I thought turkeys could fly."

It's coming right for us!

FTFA: "they're not afraid of traffic...

That's because dumbasses swerve to avoid them.

You never swerve for animals.

exparrot: "As god as my witness, I thought turkeys could fly."

Wild turkeys can. I almost ran over about 30 of 'em on hwy 49 in northern cal last wednesday. They're not very graceful, and stupid as fark, but they do, in fact, fly.

Proof is sitting in my camera ... in the car ... you'll just have to trust me.

Mr. Carlson should have used wild turkeys.

Or frozen ones...

/hotlink for the memories

exparrot: "As god as my witness, I thought turkeys could fly."

This.

Is there any other reason to remain in this thread.

Goodbye

They should call the phone cops instead. Those guys are scary.

Turkeys are some mean birds, that's for sure. Penned they kill any other bird you put in with them, wild they even fight dogs, if the dogs are not in a pack and about the same size.

All that being said; what in the hell kind of pussies do they have up there in Michigan anyway? Get a damn baseball bat and get after them. They're freaking birds, and you are a human being! Clobber em, pluck them and eat them!

/Freaking wimps.
//No wonder your football team went 3-9

PETA's made us look weak and animals will pounce on that shiat.

As God IS my witness...

/peevish pet

Die Polizei: /Been menacing me for years.

Me too! In my younger days, we used to go on "turkey hunts." If you could drink past the point where the turkey's tail sticks out on the label, you were a successful hunter. If you passed out and/or puked first, the turkey got you.

That's 0-16, varmitydog.

varmitydog: Turkeys are some mean birds, that's for sure. Penned they kill any other bird you put in with them, wild they even fight dogs, if the dogs are not in a pack and about the same size.

All that being said; what in the hell kind of pussies do they have up there in Michigan anyway? Get a damn baseball bat and get after them. They're freaking birds, and you are a human being! Clobber em, pluck them and eat them!

/Freaking wimps.
//No wonder your football team went 3-9

Turkey season is over. And the turkeys know it.

Approves

Oh, the humanity!

varmitydog: Turkeys are some mean birds, that's for sure. Penned they kill any other bird you put in with them, wild they even fight dogs, if the dogs are not in a pack and about the same size.

All that being said; what in the hell kind of pussies do they have up there in Michigan anyway? Get a damn baseball bat and get after them. They're freaking birds, and you are a human being! Clobber em, pluck them and eat them!

/Freaking wimps.
//No wonder your football team went 3-9

Up here, that's a $500 fine.

Yet another reason I am glad I left that town.

Anyone knows Les is the last person to call on for help. He really did not handle the turkey attack well.

heater: As God IS my witness...

Yeah well, good luck with trying to get her to appear in court.

THEY'RE HITTING THE GROUND LIKE SACKS OF WET CEMENT!

/ain' no school like da ol' school.

Dude! A wild turkey flew straight across my windshield just last week on I-94 in Kalamazoo (the same highway, presumably, in TFA unless they're talking about...what is the north/south one? 127?). It missed my head by about a foot, and I was going 75 mph.

Last summer, another turkey flew straight into the rear driver's side door, leaving a muddy mess everywhere. I saw it fly back into the woods.

In another incident 10 years ago, I had to stop completely (in south Kalamazoo County) to allow the 50 or 60 turkeys that were crossing and flying across a rural road.

That's one pissed off turkey

LordRosco: This problem can easily be resolved, if the Michigan DNR would allow it.

From the MiDNR web site: Season Dates: April 20-May 31, 2009 but vary by hunt number
Guaranteed Hunt Period: May 4-May 31, 2009

Revenge is near!!!

Bailey >>>>> Jennifer.






You're welcome.

Die Polizei: /Been menacing me for years.

Die Polizei, you must learn to make peace with the bird.

LukeA: You never swerve for animals.

You've obviously never seen or been involved in a deer/moose-versus-car accident. You not only swerve, but you slow-the-hell-down and look for "the rest of the gang."

And some of those Michigan turkeys can be quite large... and they make the deer look intelligent.