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(Some McFarker) Strange Assault with a breakfast sandwich - this has been your Peoria McGriddle assault update   (pjstar.com) divider line 49
More: Strange  
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4768 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Mar 2009 at 9:56 PM   |  Make this a Fark FavoriteFavorite    |   share: Share on OMGTWITTER WEB2.0share on StumbleUponshare on Facebook  more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!

49 Comments   (+0 »)


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Terrified Asexual Forcemeat 2009-03-08 09:59:58 PM  
Great, now I'm hungry.

 
The English Major [TotalFark] 2009-03-08 10:02:17 PM  
I'm lovin it.

 
Barakku [TotalFark] 2009-03-08 10:02:33 PM  
The only time I had a McGriddle was in an airport after a redeye flight. There were bits of eggshell in it. Damn you and you breakfast menu.
and your little dog, too

 
berylman 2009-03-08 10:02:43 PM  
The woman refused medical attention.

I would hope so. "HEHP! THA MAPLE SYRUP IS MELTIN' MAH SKIN!"

 
geetus 2009-03-08 10:04:07 PM  
As nasty as most McDonalds food is, those things are delicious.

/syrup-infused pancake-biscuit bun with eggs, cheese, & bacon
//yumm-o

 
Mister_farking_Twister 2009-03-08 10:04:55 PM  
The woman refused medical attention.

Shouldn't there be a HERO tag on this one subby?!?

 
the_chief 2009-03-08 10:06:53 PM  
Gone fisting.

 
rustylite 2009-03-08 10:07:11 PM  
greasy I can understand, but hot???

 
Marla Singer's Laundry [TotalFark] 2009-03-08 10:10:30 PM  
This is not a true assault sandwich like the AR-15 (see thread below).

 
skinink 2009-03-08 10:11:47 PM  
Pointed stick? Oh, oh, oh. We want to learn how to defend ourselves against pointed sticks, do we? Getting all high and mighty, eh? Breakfast sandwiches not good enough for you eh? Well I'll tell you something my lad. When you're walking home tonight and some great homicidal maniac comes after you with a bunch of flapjacks, don't come crying to me! Now, the McGriddle. When your assailant lunges at you with a McGriddle...

 
trillium13 2009-03-08 10:12:14 PM  
Seriously, if you're going to get that mad about a freaking sandwich, there's something really wrong with you.

 
buzzvert [TotalFark] 2009-03-08 10:12:15 PM  
"Peoria McGriddle" was my porn name. Ahh, the memories.

 
nomdeplume713 2009-03-08 10:15:09 PM  
i42.tinypic.com

 
broke her coccyx 2009-03-08 10:17:23 PM  
trillium13: Seriously, if you're going to get that mad about a freaking sandwich, there's something really wrong with you.

This. It's not as if people who work at McDonalds don't already have it bad enough. Also, she probably wasn't even the one who made the damn thing in the first place.

 
Inconceivable! [TotalFark] 2009-03-08 10:20:19 PM  
The McGriddle Argument:

Tucker: "Dude--That thing looks disgusting. It has to be nasty, with the syrup shiat in it. What is that?"

Slingblade: "I can only assume from your cavalier attitude that you have not yet partake of the wonderment that is the McGriddle. Let me enlighten you. What happens is the One True God grows them on trees in the Elysian Fields using a heretofore unused incantation. He then proceeds to magic them down to your local eatery where whatever Ghetto Bastard cook your McDonald's has rescued from welfare that week proceeds to wrap it in cellophane and pass it along to you, the fortunate consumer. You proceed to ingest this finery in the vain hope that your obviously over matched taste buds can somehow grasp the delectable intricacies it is suddenly faced with. Is that egg? why yes it is, and bacon too. But wait-They didn't add... yes they did, yes they did indeed. They added cheese. And then, then my friends, they wrapped it in a sumptuous pancake bun! As your taste buds try to process that amazing piece of information, IT hits them... the syrup nugget. THE MOTHERfarkING SYRUP NUGGET!!! It announces itself with a burst of confectionery grandiosity the likes of which your palate has never seen."

Tucker: "So you like them?"

Slingblade: "If you EVER speak ill of the McGriddle again I will personally force-feed you one while I fark you in the butt using the wrapper as a condom and then donkey punch you when the infused syrup nuggets explode in your mouth."

 
Genius at Work 2009-03-08 10:24:47 PM  
McGriddles? That sounds like some kind of disease. Oh, hello Agnus, how are you today? Just fine thanks, Betsy, just taking the kids to the doctor for their measles, mumps, and McGriddles vaccination.

 
loonatic112358 [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-03-08 10:25:50 PM  
the police scrambled to the scene to grill the involved over what egg-sactly happened?

 
Shrugging Atlas 2009-03-08 10:27:03 PM  
geetus: As nasty as most McDonalds food is, those things are delicious.

/syrup-infused pancake-biscuit bun with eggs, cheese, & bacon
//yumm-o


This. They are my one fast food weakness.

 
fappomatic 2009-03-08 10:30:21 PM  
I'll have the McMysterymeat combo with a side of McLard and 3 tubs of frozen polyester with M&M's.

/Loves me some steak, egg & cheese bagel.

 
Bob Ondeeznuts 2009-03-08 10:34:36 PM  
Wahhhhhh my egg like product is missing!!! What a farking retard.

 
Porous Horace 2009-03-08 10:36:00 PM  
Agreed that they're tasty, but they're so greasy-heavy, I feel like I've eaten some kind of grease rock. Love they way they turn the wrapper transparent.

I eat maybe 3/year. My head asplode when I think about people who eat like that *every day*.

 
DanRankin 2009-03-08 10:36:36 PM  
38 years old and running the drive through window.... as if life didnt suck bad enough already.

 
Sherjo311 2009-03-08 10:38:06 PM  
img2.timeinc.net

 
Bob Ondeeznuts 2009-03-08 10:38:10 PM  
DanRankin: 38 years old and running the drive through window.... as if life didnt suck bad enough already.

At least he's employed.

 
Party-sized bucket of flan 2009-03-08 10:43:06 PM  
my egg like product is missing

McD's uses real eggs. Yeah, I worked there in high school.

 
loonatic112358 [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-03-08 10:43:54 PM  
DanRankin: 38 years old and running the drive through window.... as if life didnt suck bad enough already.

perhaps he's an assitant for superdave?

 
Moray 2009-03-08 10:48:55 PM  
38 years old and running the drive through window

Would you rather have stoners driving a bus? Some people choose McDonalds for a reason. Easy and your around food. Sure you may zone out and forget to salt the fries or put the egg on the muffin but that is better than zoning out and crashing a train or bus.

 
fappomatic 2009-03-08 10:52:27 PM  
Moray: 38 years old and running the drive through window

Would you rather have stoners driving a bus? Some people choose McDonalds for a reason. Easy and your around food. Sure you may zone out and forget to salt the fries or put the egg on the muffin but that is better than zoning out and crashing a train or bus.


Yeah because God knows Ray Kroc would roll over in his grave if anyone kills any of his customers.

 
smithers85 2009-03-08 10:52:37 PM  
berylman: The woman refused medical attention.

I would hope so. "HEHP! THA MAPLE SYRUP IS MELTIN' MAH SKIN!"


probably didn't want to piss test... what would you do if you were 38 working at McDonalds and got assaulted with a sandwich?

 
eas81 2009-03-08 10:57:38 PM  
Item in question...

www.karshconnect.com

 
ski9600 2009-03-08 11:02:59 PM  
Porous Horace: Agreed that they're tasty, but they're so greasy-heavy, I feel like I've eaten some kind of grease rock. Love they way they turn the wrapper transparent.

I eat maybe 3/year. My head asplode when I think about people who eat like that *every day*.


What your eggs are sticking to the pan? You're doing it wrong.
The eggs should be poached in really hot bacon grease.

 
FarkWhat 2009-03-08 11:04:06 PM  
whats up with that girl? there must be somebody somewhere telling her that thats a good look for her?
i71.photobucket.com

 
pwn3d781 2009-03-08 11:16:59 PM  
Inconceivable!: The McGriddle Argument:

Tucker: "Dude--That thing looks disgusting. It has to be nasty, with the syrup shiat in it. What is that?"

Slingblade: "I can only assume from your cavalier attitude that you have not yet partake of the wonderment that is the McGriddle. Let me enlighten you. What happens is the One True God grows them on trees in the Elysian Fields using a heretofore unused incantation. He then proceeds to magic them down to your local eatery where whatever Ghetto Bastard cook your McDonald's has rescued from welfare that week proceeds to wrap it in cellophane and pass it along to you, the fortunate consumer. You proceed to ingest this finery in the vain hope that your obviously over matched taste buds can somehow grasp the delectable intricacies it is suddenly faced with. Is that egg? why yes it is, and bacon too. But wait-They didn't add... yes they did, yes they did indeed. They added cheese. And then, then my friends, they wrapped it in a sumptuous pancake bun! As your taste buds try to process that amazing piece of information, IT hits them... the syrup nugget. THE MOTHERfarkING SYRUP NUGGET!!! It announces itself with a burst of confectionery grandiosity the likes of which your palate has never seen."

Tucker: "So you like them?"

Slingblade: "If you EVER speak ill of the McGriddle again I will personally force-feed you one while I fark you in the butt using the wrapper as a condom and then donkey punch you when the infused syrup nuggets explode in your mouth."


Came for this. Left satisfied. Have never tried a McGriddle.

 
Solty Dog 2009-03-08 11:24:46 PM  
Burger Shot through the heart?

 
joe manco 2009-03-08 11:29:42 PM  
Minor threadjack.

Is McGriddles singular or plural?? I feel like McDonalds wants it to be singular.

"Hello, sir. Would you like to try a McGriddles?" "Yes, I would like one bacon McGriddles."

 
mccallcl 2009-03-08 11:37:59 PM  
joe manco: Is McGriddles singular or plural?? I feel like McDonalds wants it to be singular.

It's like Apple and "iPod".

On another note, I am now obsessed with trying a food that is not available for 8 hours.

Screw it, I am going to a diner and getting pancakes. So hungry!

 
The Invisible Sky Wizard 2009-03-08 11:46:55 PM  
loonatic112358: the police scrambled to the scene to grill the involved over what egg-sactly happened?

*BA-DUM TISH*

 
Driver [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-03-08 11:57:08 PM  
He must have ordered the Un-Happy Meal.

 
throwupvomitupchuck 2009-03-09 12:06:09 AM  
Peorian here. Usually any assault at that particular McD's is with a gun, so I'm sure being hit with a McGriddle instead of bullets is a welcome change.

 
Dinty Moore's Law 2009-03-09 12:31:20 AM  
throwupvomitupchuck: Peorian here.

[threadjack] Any Peoria area Farkers: come down to the Jukebox Comedy Club. Your 1st drink's on me. Ask for Dinty. (No shiat)
/Met 2 of Richard Pryor's sons tonight. Good show. [end threadjack]

 
Gyrfalcon [TotalFark] 2009-03-09 01:06:06 AM  
Bob Ondeeznuts: DanRankin: 38 years old and running the drive through window.... as if life didnt suck bad enough already.

At least he's employed.


If you can call it that. More like paid to be greasy.

 
Marnett2005 2009-03-09 01:06:19 AM  
At least I'm not the only Peoria farker here.

 
RottNDude 2009-03-09 01:12:27 AM  
nomdeplume713, looks like Twiggy McTweakerson could use a few McGriddles...

 
Bagelox-99 2009-03-09 01:18:53 AM  
broke her coccyx: trillium13: Seriously, if you're going to get that mad about a freaking sandwich, there's something really wrong with you.

This. It's not as if people who work at McDonalds don't already have it bad enough. Also, she probably wasn't even the one who made the damn thing in the first place.


In addition to which, the guy back of you honks his horn, you throw the sammich at the window person? THROW IT AT THE GUY BACK OF YOU! GEEZ!

 
Taima [TotalFark] 2009-03-09 02:08:09 AM  
Oh yeah, if the grease and cholesterol don't git 'cha, the crazy customers will.

/never had one, those things sound nasty, and not in a good way.

 
FarkWhat 2009-03-09 02:15:32 AM  
Take a tip girly before its too late for you also. Yes its a shame. you start out with a perfectly good Beautiful Woman.
i71.photobucket.com
Then they start adding more and more god awfull things to themselves and ruin it. Good Thing where have you gone?
i71.photobucket.com

 
MonkeyMeg 2009-03-09 03:40:34 AM  
/from Peoria
/it's a hell hole
/got out within a month of turning 18

 
theBigBigEye 2009-03-09 05:22:04 AM  
At least the ass-headed douche didn't call 911 to biatch about it.

 
sonocide6 2009-03-10 08:44:55 AM  
This is the kind of stuff that makes me proud to be from Peoria. Great to see all you other Peoria farkers commenting!

 
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