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(Wired) Spiffy Scientists want to use "ball lightning" as a weapon. What could possibly go wrong?   (blog.wired.com) divider line 145
More: Spiffy  
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18123 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Feb 2009 at 2:04 PM   |  Make this a Fark FavoriteFavorite    |   share: Share on OMGTWITTER WEB2.0share on StumbleUponshare on Facebook  more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!

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2wolves 2009-02-21 12:47:40 PM  
First shot in the lab... kid is only wearing flip flops. There's some fine safety protocol.

 
St_Francis_P [TotalFark] 2009-02-21 01:09:34 PM  
Actually...a lot could go right. As the article mentioned, containing a plasma would come in handy for nuclear fusion.

 
CheddarPants [TotalFark] 2009-02-21 01:18:14 PM  
That headline made me think of this. (new window)

 
SilentStrider [TotalFark] 2009-02-21 01:19:57 PM  
wasn't there an episode of Miami Vice about this?

 
globalwarmingpraiser [TotalFark] 2009-02-21 01:20:20 PM  
Meh first thought of in this show.

www.hobo-bonobo.co.uk


/Has Fark finaly been stumped.

 
alonzinator [TotalFark] 2009-02-21 01:20:48 PM  
What the hell are you people talking about? I just see streetlights.

 
UNC_Samurai [TotalFark] 2009-02-21 01:25:24 PM  
What could possibly go wrong?

It gets blocked by a Tundra Wolf and you've wasted it.

 
Alebak 2009-02-21 02:07:36 PM  
LIGHTNINGBOLT!
LIGHTNINGBOLT!
LIGHTNINGBOLT!
LIGHTNINGBOLT!
LIGHTNINGBOLT!
LIGHTNINGBOLT!
FIREBALL!
LIGHTNINGBOLT!
LIGHTNINGBOLT!

 
ShamWowofDamocles 2009-02-21 02:08:07 PM  
Ball lightning is what I call my sperm, so I am really getting a kick out these replies....

/Automan

 
PunchDrunkPanda 2009-02-21 02:08:10 PM  
Diminishing return?

 
Ignition Tube 2009-02-21 02:08:45 PM  
globalwarmingpraiser: /Has Fark finaly been stumped.

I am surprised that Automan has his own Wikipedia page.

 
Swampthing in Korea 2009-02-21 02:09:28 PM  
As long the scientist is the right level and the enemy fails their saving throw, nothing can go wrong!

 
Doctor Funkenstein [TotalFark] 2009-02-21 02:09:33 PM  
ShamWowofDamocles: Ball lightning is what I call my sperm, so I am really getting a kick out these replies....

/Automan


Thank you. I knew there was a balls joke in here somewhere and I just couldn't get to it.

 
Hoarf 2009-02-21 02:10:23 PM  
i173.photobucket.com

THAT'S what would go wrong.

 
Kosh 2009-02-21 02:10:32 PM  
sales.starcitygames.com

/hotlinked

 
ninjakirby [TotalFark] 2009-02-21 02:11:08 PM  
I just want a SpinFuser. No more, no less.

 
Aeonite [TotalFark] 2009-02-21 02:11:24 PM  
Koloc also theorized that if a donut-shaped plasmoid was created accidentally -- say, during a lightning strike -- it would remain stable for a period of seconds of minutes

Holy Cripes! Seconds of minutes is almost as long as minutes of hours!

 
the_sidewinder [TotalFark] 2009-02-21 02:12:16 PM  
Best part? It's called the "Phased Hyper-Acceleration for Shock, EMP and Radiation," or PHASER for short

 
Nurglitch 2009-02-21 02:13:15 PM  
PPC!

 
Ninja Wicked 2009-02-21 02:13:47 PM  
You know who else used lightning war?

 
thinks_on_feet 2009-02-21 02:13:54 PM  
I can see how shooting lightning at a doods balls would work as a deterrent, but what are they going to use against chicks?

Those mooslims use chicks as their terror mules now.

/The ball lightning does nothing!

 
JonPace [TotalFark] 2009-02-21 02:14:38 PM  
tbn0.google.com

 
the_sidewinder [TotalFark] 2009-02-21 02:14:40 PM  
Ninja Wicked: You know who else used lightning war?

Zeus?

 
Fluffy_the_cactus 2009-02-21 02:15:08 PM  
Call me when they can cast magic missile

/where are the Cheetos?!

 
AlecRazec 2009-02-21 02:16:40 PM  
I came here for D&D, MtG, and Battletech references.

MtG, satiated.

Could use more Btech, but at least see it's referenced.

And D&D, come on guys? We got no wizards here?

 
Laz Long [TotalFark] 2009-02-21 02:17:24 PM  
the_sidewinder: Best part? It's called the "Phased Hyper-Acceleration for Shock, EMP and Radiation," or PHASER for short

Which made me start looking for other signs of a spoof. Such as mentioning that it could be set to stun...

/Then again, anyone working in this field is an uber geek.

 
vudukungfu 2009-02-21 02:17:46 PM  
the_sidewinder: Best part? It's called the "Phased Hyper-Acceleration for Shock, EMP and Radiation," or PHASER for short

I'm stunned by this revelation.

 
r1niceboy 2009-02-21 02:18:50 PM  
In other news, next door, God spoke to Kent.

 
Fluffy_the_cactus 2009-02-21 02:20:18 PM  
AlecRazec: I came here for D&D, MtG, and Battletech references.

MtG, satiated.

Could use more Btech, but at least see it's referenced.

And D&D, come on guys? We got no wizards here?


Hello-oo?!

 
Ninja Wicked 2009-02-21 02:20:25 PM  
img98.imageshack.us

 
Jonny D 2009-02-21 02:21:18 PM  
Don't worry! As long as you hit that wire with the connecting hook at precisely 88 miles per hour, the instant the lightning strikes the tower... everything will be fine.

 
dewflinky 2009-02-21 02:22:45 PM  
The mech wars shall be fought by the clans, with technologies currently being researched by the our own scientists. Until they invent a portable gauss rifle as an option, I propose strengthening the advancement of potato guns. PPC + potato = baked potato.

 
saintstryfe 2009-02-21 02:22:50 PM  
Blizzard will nerf it because they hate Shamans

 
Ignition Tube 2009-02-21 02:23:10 PM  
This is why you should always have a persona available that nulls lightning...

 
fireclown 2009-02-21 02:23:21 PM  
www.sffchronicles.co.uk
Nothing really. We like it just fine!

 
General Vayo [TotalFark] 2009-02-21 02:23:39 PM  
AlecRazec:
Could use more Btech, but at least see it's referenced.


PPCs ain't ball lightning, they're lightning guns that give a kick to the balls.

/Clan ER PPC: Best, weapon, ever.
//I don't want a Clan-hating rant, I hear enough of that from my friends.

 
AnnOnymous 2009-02-21 02:23:47 PM  
My husband's working on this project, so I'm getting a real kick...

/no really
//really really
///he is, in fact, an ubergeek

 
rezfly 2009-02-21 02:26:18 PM  
ninjakirby: I just want a SpinFuser. No more, no less.

the SpinFusor is my fave as well. MA's and all.

i saw a big (or close) ball o' lightning going down I-35 in south Austin once and every car/truck slowed until it vanished. it was freaky.

 
Icon-Cat 2009-02-21 02:26:28 PM  
UNC_Samurai: What could possibly go wrong?

It gets blocked by a Tundra Wolf and you've wasted it.


I am so, so happy someone beat me to the M:TG reference.

// three red mana

 
skyservant74 2009-02-21 02:26:49 PM  
Approves
www.vgmuseum.com

 
skyservant74 2009-02-21 02:28:05 PM  
well nevermind then. Sypha from Castlevania.

 
Ghostbox 2009-02-21 02:28:57 PM  
so...we're not far away from blasters? WHEN CAN I HAVE ONE!?

 
nelbuts1 2009-02-21 02:29:11 PM  
UFO
UFO
UFO
They are lying to us. I knew it, I knew it! Everybody run!

 
Oldiron_79 2009-02-21 02:30:37 PM  
sapper_pig: Approves.

Everything is going as I have foreseen

 
Proud2B_American 2009-02-21 02:33:02 PM  
I was expecting to see a story about a cop hitting some perp in the nuts with a taser...too bad...would have been funny

 
GENETICBAGGAGE 2009-02-21 02:33:36 PM  
A walmart bag, floating in the wind,...weapon'izzzed......
Only if you cover it in bacon grease, and float it through bagdad.

/
//

 
pitydafoo 2009-02-21 02:34:30 PM  
There once was a man from Grant's Pass
With two balls that were made of brass
When they clanged together
During stormy weather
Then lightning shot out of his ass

 
Nagaempress 2009-02-21 02:36:49 PM  
saintstryfe: Blizzard will nerf it because they hate Shamans

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA

/My Shammy thanks you

 
id49606 2009-02-21 02:39:48 PM  
Gads! All my little dreams of world domination are coming true! Now all I need is to finish the space station lair...

 
dreadprophet 2009-02-21 02:40:27 PM  
www.dystopia-game.com

 
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