The only way to save the institution of marriage is to finally let homosexuals marry, that way it can be cool again...

At least we won't have so many threading issues.

Why get married when having illegitimate kids is practically a cottage industry? Bring back the word and stigma of "bastard" and maybe marriage will return. (but I doubt it)

I would still like to get married some day...

bearsfolks: Why get married when having illegitimate kids is practically a cottage industry? Bring back the word and stigma of "bastard" and maybe marriage will return. (but I doubt it)

I, for one, welcome the return of shotgun marriages.

DamnYankees: I would still like to get married some day...

Well, sailor, you're going to have to pony up a ring then. I'm easy, not cheap...

DamnYankees: I would still like to get married some day...

Yeah, me too :(

I will think about marriage only after I own my own house and have a decent amount in savings. I figure this will happen sometime around my 40th birthday. I don't mind waiting.

bearsfolks [TotalFark] 2009-02-15 06:43:09 PM
Why get married when having illegitimate kids is practically a cottage industry? Bring back the word and stigma of "bastard" and maybe marriage will return. (but I doubt it)

3/10

/but why have kids in the first place, illegitimate or not?



/needs to make one of these for marriage

Marriage is dying, and it should.

Stupid custom

Ummmmm yeah but that's England and not the USA.

Well the FTA contains no research, so I am free to bloviate.

Women have learned they don't need husbands to be mothers.
Men are learning (?) that marriage (esp. marriage w/kids) often comes with a free ticket to the poorhouse.

On the other hand, there are alternatives other than remaining single to the £21,000 marriage she fusses over.

DamnYankees: I would still like to get married some day...

Yeah, some people still need to stick their hand in the fire to learn what HOT! is.

What that article didn't mention (and all others like it) is why a two-parent traditional married household is the gold standard for relationships. "That's just the way it's always been" isn't a convincing argument for me, nor a reason to get all nostalgic. Things were not always better in the past, nor is the future always some scary deconstruction of "traditional values." If marriages were such sacred and perfect bonds of universal harmony, they wouldn't be falling into disfavor as society evolves.

Sure let the alternate life style folks get hitched. They deserve to be as miserable as the rest of the straight married folk.

yeah, married 15 years.. wouldn't change it..


/much

The article is a little scatterbrained, but this is the main point:

By contrast, a couple in their twenties contemplating marriage have almost no chance of finding a place to live that they can afford to buy. After school or college, young people are stuck at home for longer than any previous generation (their grandparents would have buggered off at 16 or 18)... and thousands are crippled with massive student loans.

Responsible people are inclined to get married only when they are financially solvent. Marriage rates are dropping in Europe and the UK because the economic situation is so poor for young people. The US is lagging behind them, but expect to see the same thing here in a few years.

'Singletons'?

British 'English' never cease to amaze me...

Maybe if divorce weren't such a nearly universal institutionalized raping of males people wouldn't be so scared of getting married in the first place. As it is, there is basically zero reason for women NOT to get married and absolutely every (objective) reason for a man to never marry.

Let me be the first to say that I'm married and I enjoy it.

Let me also say that I really don't think marriage is for everybody and furthermore I absolutely believe gay marriage should be allowed.

Marriage was never about love.

Marriage was a business proposal. The man got someone to help him pass on his genes, someone to cook and clean for him, and an improvement to his social standing... and of course regular booty.

The woman, who had limited property rights (if any) and couldn't work for a living, got someone to support her while she raised children. She also got home security in a world where violence against women was not all that criminal and also got an improvement to her social standing.

The reason why marriage is dying is because it isn't necessary anymore. Women are empowered. They can find jobs and work and are not reliant on a man to do so. Men don't have to be married to have someone to cook and clean for them and don't need a wife to get laid regularly.

It's dying because it's obsolete.

Maybe overall, but there are still plenty of dumbass rich kids getting married in their young 20's because it's trendy and they desperately want the attention. There are two guys in my extended circle of friends right now who can't shut up for 5 min about how expensive their weddings are going to be, and how excited they are, and where they're going to be, and what they are going to have in them, and how their fiances are micromanaging everything but, heaven help them, they love them to death anyway! Excuse me, I have to go hurl.

Marriages are just a gigantic ego trip nowadays. They serve no purpose unless you are ready to have kids, which most of these young people certainly are not.

This is my 25th year of "co-habitation", so I'm getting a kick out of these replies. When we first moved in together, "cohabitation" was still illegal in MA, punishable by a $300 fine or a year in jail. There is no common law marriage in MA so we can't file jointly. But I see ZERO advantage to it and quite honestly in 25 years I've yet to meet anyone who cares about our living arrangements.

I'm as married as anyone. Three kids, two houses, investments, stocks, bonds etc. Everything legal and proper for both of us. The only thing that might need updating is a health care proxy.

Damned if I can see any reason to dump money into the farked up princess for a day wedding industry

lmb1982: DamnYankees: I would still like to get married some day...

Yeah, me too :(

Don't worry. You're cute enough that you'll find someone.

Seriously, you could be the biggest biatch on the planet - I doubt that you are even close, for the record - and it wouldn't matter. You'll find someone willing to put up with you.

Going on the assumption that you're cool, however, you'll find someone you love who feels the same way.

Can'tLetYouDoThatStarFox: There are two guys in my extended circle of friends right now who can't shut up for 5 min about how expensive their weddings are going to be, and how excited they are, and where they're going to be, and what they are going to have in them...

You know how I know they're gay?

People figured out they don't have to form teams to get through life?

Kierkegaard's Pseudonym: What that article didn't mention (and all others like it) is why a two-parent traditional married household is the gold standard for relationships.

The two-parent traditional married household is at most only lasted as long as there's been agriculture. Before that it was all tribal. Marriages were arranged but for the most part, the guys hung with each other doing guy stuff and the ladies and kids hung around doing ladies and kids stuff.

Name one reason that people should marry.

Seriously, one.

You won't be able to.

(other than marriage laws, like foreign SO citizenship, and taxes, but those are just enforcing the concept of marriage, which makes no sense. Those should go away, too.)

If marriage didn't exist, would you invent it?

Marriage should not be a legal institution. Getting married should be like joining a fraternity.
'Baby, this shiat we got together is great. We need to get the government in on this... We need judges and lawyers in on this.'

/Doug Stanhope.

Has anyone said "I blame this on global warming" yet..?

Marriage is great.
I guess I'm just lucky.

Forced Perspective
'Singletons'?

British 'English' never cease to amaze me...

So you speak American, not English.
No need for the quotation marks around it --- it's what they speak.
Get over it.

FWIW, I never heard the term singleton except in the U.S.

dionada: Can'tLetYouDoThatStarFox: There are two guys in my extended circle of friends right now who can't shut up for 5 min about how expensive their weddings are going to be, and how excited they are, and where they're going to be, and what they are going to have in them...

You know how I know they're gay?

Don't know about gay. Emasculated, sure.

I really don't have anything against the custom of marriage, but I do think it's kind of funny that we rely on our religions and/or government to delineate the steps we need to go through to commit to each other.

I predict this thread goes 350 comments long.

I'm trying to get divorced right now, and I tend to agree. I would never have gotten married under normal circumstances, but mine weren't normal. Turns out I shouldn't have done it anyway. I won't do it again unless I'm going to have a kid or if I'm with someone for a long time and one of us needs health insurance or something. Other than that, there's no point.

annoyed_grunt: Maybe if divorce weren't such a nearly universal institutionalized raping of males people wouldn't be so scared of getting married in the first place. As it is, there is basically zero reason for women NOT to get married and absolutely every (objective) reason for a man to never marry.

hallelujiah and a resounding DUH!

my ex-girlfriend who had been married twice before broke it off with me (or was it the other way around? depends on your perspective) when i told her i wanted nothing to do with marriage. never mind that we had been together as a stable couple for twice as long as both of her previous marriages combined.

she just loves the idea of marrying ANYONE that she would rather destroy the most successful relationship of her entire life. quoting her, "my only goal in life is to be married". that's why i told her to fark off. good riddance!

I just finally got my divorce papers so I'm getting a kick... I was married for 12 years, my recommendation to any who to get married? Don't! I'm just happy as hell I didn't have any children with that Xanax eating, gambleholic.

/not bitter
//just happy to be free

clifton: bearsfolks: Why get married when having illegitimate kids is practically a cottage industry? Bring back the word and stigma of "bastard" and maybe marriage will return. (but I doubt it)

I, for one, welcome the return of shotgun marriages.

Where do you stand on shotgun divorces?

Marriage couldn't be more unattractive - the number of us getting hitched has slumped to the lowest level since records began, 150 years ago. By next year, it's predicted that singletons will be in the majority.

I drink to that, mate!

The author of the article has been married four times. There's a difference between "singletons" and "divorcedtons".

lordargent: Why get married when having illegitimate kids is practically a cottage industry? Bring back the word and stigma of "bastard" and maybe marriage will return. (but I doubt it)

Wow. Yeah. Life was better back then. _______ knew their place.

We want PRENUP!

Definitely Terra Incognita. There has never been a society without marriage. One wonders if it will be viable. Buckle up,. kiddies, it's time to play test pilot....

lmb1982: DamnYankees: I would still like to get married some day...

Yeah, me too :(

Yeah, me.. three?

Xetal: It's dying because it's obsolete.

you make some good points, but for marriage to really die, you'll have to propose a modern cure for loneliness.

There's something really nice and comfortable about a long-term sexual relationship* that can't be replaced by serial monogamy. Don't you kind of envy those old couples that you see in the park still holding hands and stuff?

*in before "ha ha there's no sex in marriage" - studies suggest otherwise

Fact Man: Name one reason that people should marry.

Seriously, one.

You won't be able to.

(other than marriage laws, like foreign SO citizenship, and taxes, but those are just enforcing the concept of marriage, which makes no sense. Those should go away, too.)

1.) Because they want to.

I wonder what the stats are for the United States, I think marriage is a pretty common occurrence for our culture. I bet minorities have higher levels or marrying.

mesmer242: lmb1982: DamnYankees: I would still like to get married some day...

Yeah, me too :(

Yeah, me.. three?

Why? What will marriage add to your lives that you can't have without it?

One of you three, answer this, please.

Then why's there still a stigma against unwed parents?

mesmer242: lmb1982: DamnYankees: I would still like to get married some day...

Yeah, me too :(

Yeah, me.. three?

Why?? If you need a piece of paper to reinforce your committment to someone, there wasn't much hope for you in the first place. :(