And the list goes on;

Tall
Good Looking
Caring
Rich

Women need to learn that they can pick any three of the above because expecting anything more is asking too much.

/But then again, as a man I know that we can't live without women, so we should just STFU and learn "yes dear"!

I'd like to give my opinion on this, but my wife hasn't told me what it is yet.

What men want...........what women want:


/wife is still sleeping, so I am allowed

I actually said "yes dear" to my wife in reply to everything that she said until she forbade me from saying it because she didn't like how it sounded. Now I can't say anything. :-(

Best advice my Dad ever gave me about being a husband:

"Four words; Yesr Dear and I'm Sorry. Either agree or apologize, because even if it isn't your fault it soon will be."


Man, I miss him.

Crapweasel: And the list goes on;

Tall
Good Looking
Caring
Rich

Women need to learn that they can pick any three of the above because expecting anything more is asking too much.

/But then again, as a man I know that we can't live without women, so we should just STFU and learn "yes dear"!

No, no, no, you've got it all wrong. Don't you listen to them? They don't care what the guy looks like or how much money he makes, as long as he's nice, funny, goofy, sensitive...

*snickering bitterly under breath*

Skail: as long as he's nice, funny, goofy, sensitive...

So my wife has been lying to me all these years.......shiat

I've gotten my honeydo lists since May 1990.
/proud member, when it's not on the mantle

You forgot to add to the list "and a complete jerk who won't acknowledge their existence"

I want a woman with slight personality and social issues that I can warp into a complete and total emotional dependence on me. Then I'm going to fake my death, video tape her reaction, and then post it on YouTube. Then I'll post me telling her she was Punk'd a week later.

It's God's little joke--give the vagina to the person who thinks the solution to any problem is to throw crockery at the nearest male.

.

ZAZ: Appearing in various forms on the internet:
THE PERFECT MAN

The perfect man is gentle,
Never cruel or mean;
He has a beautiful smile,
And he keeps his face so clean.

The perfect man likes children
And will raise them by your side.
He will be a good father
And a husband to his bride.

The perfect man loves cooking,
Cleaning and vacuuming, too.
He'll do anything in his power
To show his love to you.

The perfect man is sweet,
Writing poetry in your name.
He's a best friend to your mother
And kisses away your pain.

He never makes you cry
Or hurt in any way.
Oh, fark this stupid poem...
The perfect man is gay.

I am everything but the last.
NTTAWWT

Be as much like James Bond as you can, except for the infidelity, compulsive gambling, chain smoking, and killing people parts.

- Rinkworks "How to be Romantic"

Please. Women just want a rich man.

eddyatwork: Please. Women just want a rich man.

Not completely true. There are lots of women out there, perfectly happy with their men, and they don't have much money. You keep saying that Money is the reason..... But a rich ugly asshole doesn't end up with a good woman.

Women don't have a farking clue as to what they want, they just want!

Sure, why settle?

fuzzwell: eddyatwork: Please. Women just want a rich man.

Not completely true. There are lots of women out there, perfectly happy with their men, and they don't have much money. You keep saying that Money is the reason..... But a rich ugly asshole doesn't end up with a good woman.

No, he ends up with LOTS of good women.

Gotdamn, you guys are





-ed

theflatline: Women want what the do not have, and do not want what they have.

So very different from men, who go out for hamburger all the time.

If I can be all that for my gf, is an occasional bj so much to ask?

A large bank account and a penis.


Everything else is bullshiat to convince you to hand them more money.

i am so glad i'm divorced.

-i have a son...and no pekker payments.

she was the whore who strayed...for crank, no less.

-she had it all...and she, like many of her kind...didn't know it till it was gone.

it's all about the "bbd".

it started with "eve"...and went downhill from there.

the worse thing a married man can do is give up being a man.

-trying to be sympathetic...when there is no clear reason.

-trying to be apologetic...when there is no clear reason.

-being loving and caring...when it's only an act to her.

-being faithful...when she is a lying, thieving coont.

if it weren't for having children...we'd all have automatrons.

marriage is for the weak minded and the sexually hogtied.

-that, i know for certain.

Ladies I'm all of these things. And more.

/cheesy

Being single, I AM getting a kick out of these replies.



/now back to Sukiyaki Western Django

ghare: fuzzwell: eddyatwork: Please. Women just want a rich man.

Not completely true. There are lots of women out there, perfectly happy with their men, and they don't have much money. You keep saying that Money is the reason..... But a rich ugly asshole doesn't end up with a good woman.

No, he ends up with LOTS of good women.

No, he ends up with LOTS of superficially hot women. Not necessarily good women.

Bauer: she was the whore who strayed...for crank, no less.

No offense, but your spacing alone would make me fark the pool boy.

that is all-

No one knows what women want, including them.
Plus, it will only change once they get what they think they want.

The only girls with good personalities who are smart or maybe funny or halfway intelligent or talented, though god knows what the fack that means, are ugly chicks.

This is because they have to make up for how facking unattractive they are.

Bauer: marriage is for the weak minded and the sexually hogtied.

So marriage is evil because you married and then got taken advantage of by a meth head? Great reasoning.

I know the "bitter single/divorced" guy is a popular person to be on Fark but in real life people and especially women will avoid you like the plague.

Its not attractive and its not healthy. Just get over it, move forward with your life and your son and be happy that life cut you a break.

you must be new here.

-get in line.

that is the response i figured i'd get from the first peehole that chirped up.

get right with god...you heathen 'women'.

it's your only hope.

evidently...the truth does not set "some people" free.

Women need to STFU and get back in the kitchen.....

mmagdalene: Bauer: she was the whore who strayed...for crank, no less.

No offense, but your spacing alone would make me fark the pool boy.

*Coughs* Point proven.

The picky woman's date calculator

Found this in the best of craigslist once.

Some guy in Southern California basically took census data and made a bunch of checkboxes based on it.

Basically, you start off with the entire male population of southern california, as you check things off, it eliminates men from the pool.

Example

Starting with the population of San Diego (423,213)
Eliminate all men who are 55+ (316,535)
Eliminate all of the large (aka fat) guys (243,732)

Just like that, almost half the men in San Diego are toast, and that's just from reasonable selections. Now let's think up what a picky woman would select.

Eliminate all men who are shorter than 5'10" (121,866)
Ohh hell, might as well make that shorter than 5'11" (38,753)
Come to think of it, toss those chubby guys as well (20,634)
Lose the high school dropouts (15,589)
Toss anyone that makes under 50k, this is California after all (4,318)
Now toss the below average, and average, looking guys (690)

So, that chick is down to 690 guys in the entire San Diego area, and we haven't even filtered on race, profession, smoking, religion, or political views yet.

Women by nature want the opposite of what they have. The grass is always greener on the other side.

I'm so beat down by all of this I can only think of one thing I have left to offer.

mmagdalene: Bauer: she was the whore who strayed...for crank, no less.

No offense, but your spacing alone would make me fark the pool boy.

Yeah, but it made her skinny, right?

Bauer: i am so glad i'm divorced.

-i have a son...and no pekker payments.

she was the whore who strayed...for crank, no less.

-she had it all...and she, like many of her kind...didn't know it till it was gone.

it's all about the "bbd".

it started with "eve"...and went downhill from there.

the worse thing a married man can do is give up being a man.

-trying to be sympathetic...when there is no clear reason.

-trying to be apologetic...when there is no clear reason.

-being loving and caring...when it's only an act to her.

-being faithful...when she is a lying, thieving coont.

if it weren't for having children...we'd all have automatrons.

marriage is for the weak minded and the sexually hogtied.

-that, i know for certain.

Man, my ex is trying to ruin my life and Im no where near this bitter..

LandOfChocolate: Bauer: marriage is for the weak minded and the sexually hogtied.

So marriage is evil because you married and then got taken advantage of by a meth head? Great reasoning.

I know the "bitter single/divorced" guy is a popular person to be on Fark but in real life people and especially women will avoid you like the plague.

Its not attractive and its not healthy. Just get over it, move forward with your life and your son and be happy that life cut you a break.


/hot

mmagdalene: theflatline: Women want what the do not have, and do not want what they have.

So very different from men, who go out for hamburger all the time.

They only go out for hamburger if the prime rib is reserved for holidays and the occasional sunday brunch.

/both parties do are pretty equal and not knowing what they want.

You know what I miss about being in a relationship?

Nothing.

LandOfChocolate: No, he ends up with LOTS of superficially hot women. Not necessarily good women.

Yeh, that's something to be ashamed of.

A: Be strong but nice, frugal but not poor, willing to show emotion, etc etc etc, and end up doing a ton of work to find an equally good woman who will probably cheat.

or

B: Be a rich jackass and have floozies lining up.

This isn't even a choice.

"The 76 female undergrads in the study wanted their fellows to be the hero"

Yeah, right, undergraduates. Ten years on, they'll want his balls and his money in their purses. American women don't want men today; they just want a wallet and a yes-man to tell them how great they are.

The truth is they want an asshole. Weird how it is, but once I was given this advice it has been a whole new world for me. Don't know why it works, don't make sense, but it works.

Further proof that:

A) Women are delusional about men.
B) Women have unrealistic expectations that, for some reason, seem realistic to them.

Know why a man will never win an arguement with a woman? It's not because the woman's right: It's because Men have an instinctual need for things to make sense.

Captain Fantastic: that is all-

You need to change that sign to "All American Women..."

Skail: No, no, no, you've got it all wrong. Don't you listen to them? They don't care what the guy looks like or how much money he makes, as long as he's nice, funny, goofy, sensitive...

_{... and has a huge dick.}