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(One New Now) Scary "I certainly cannot judge whether or not Barack Obama has a relationship with Christ...However, scripture tells us that you will be known by your fruits and here Barack Obama is promoting counter-biblical, anti-Christian policies"   (onenewsnow.com) divider line 198
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198 Comments   (+0 »)


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Xaxor [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 01:31:38 AM  
Wow, one big clusterfark.

 
7of7 [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 01:47:06 AM  
Anti-Christian? You mean he's intelligent and thoughtful?

 
Howie Spankowitz [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 01:49:15 AM  
The butthurt is strong in this one.

 
UNC_Samurai [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 01:50:22 AM  
At OneNewsNow.com, you will get your news from reporters you can trust to give the latest news without the liberal bias that characterizes so much of the "mainstream" media.

I love it when you can go from article to website About Us page and instantly know you're dealing with nothing but WHARRGARBL.

 
006andahalf 2009-01-24 01:53:41 AM  
If the last eight years have taught us anything, I hope that the big O-man is the frikin' antichrist to Bush's good Christian values.

 
ProLurker 2009-01-24 01:53:58 AM  
Yeah. Scriptures written in by man, in a confusing language. Then interpreted by a different man many years later. Probably nothing in lost in translation though. Right?

RIGHT?

 
SilentStrider [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 01:58:23 AM  
Howie Spankowitz: The butthurt is strong in this one.

no, he's a good christian man. Things done with the butt are sinful and must be hidden.

And then there's Ted Haggard.

 
BladBoy [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 02:01:54 AM  
I certainly cannot say that Matt Barber, director of cultural affairs with Liberty Counsel, likes to fark goats, but...it sure does look that way.

 
kmmontandon [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 02:05:19 AM  
Yeah, because the three-thousand year-old oral traditions, superstitions, fables, and tribal customs of a pack of goat-herding, cattle-sacrificing desert primitives should be our moral touchstone.

 
ChewbaccaJones [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 02:14:19 AM  
If Jesus ever taught me one important thing it was this:

It is OK to dislike someone as long as they were not you or the people you identified as like you.


...also, he did not like the Amish.
...I would apologise on the Jesus' behalf at this point, but he assured me that none of them could read this anyway, so fark-em.

 
Howie Spankowitz [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 02:22:34 AM  
SilentStrider: Howie Spankowitz: The butthurt is strong in this one.

no, he's a good christian man. Things done with the butt are sinful and must be hidden.

And then there's Ted Haggard.


The sin is what makes the butt hurt. I thought I made that clear. Here...bend over...I'll show you.

 
Otto's_Jacket [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 02:33:47 AM  
7of7: Anti-Christian? You mean he's intelligent and thoughtful?


Aw crap dude, I didn't even wipe my feet before coming in here and reading that. Done and done.

 
T.M.S. [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 02:36:16 AM  
I think we missed an opportunity here. From the moment Obama took the White house there was obviously going to be unprecedented attacks on his administration.

We all knew this was going to happen. And, to no ones surprise the attacks are as intense as they are absurd.

Parallel to the effort in getting him elected there should have been a movement to all agree to ignore every batshiat crazy network, news outlet, blog and website. It would be very hard to do but imagine if every protest from the crazies was met with a deafening silence?

Still, what would we then do with ourselves all day and night?

 
MorrisBird [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 02:43:05 AM  
Article is farked. Where is your Jebus now?

 
Bill_Wick's_Friend 2009-01-24 03:05:28 AM  

 
T.M.S. [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 03:23:59 AM  
Bill_Wick's_Friend: Abraham Lincoln is a hero to Barack Obama. The lunch has a definite Lincoln feel, from what's on the menu to the dishes, which are replicas of those purchased by Mary Todd Lincoln for the White House back in the 1860s. The caterers, Design Cuisine of Arlington, Va., told the Washington Post they were asked to make a meal "reminiscent of the Lincoln era."

Here's the menu:

Seafood stew with lobster, scallops, shrimp and black cod under puff pastry.


I bet that's the part Matt Barber and his Liberty Counsel are talking about, cuz they're such strict interpreters of Leviticus, right?

Also I heard Obama's suit was made of silk and bulletproof kevlar thread. Surely that's shatnez! An aveyrah!


To this day I boycott Red Lobster.

Who's with me?

 
platkat [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 03:31:54 AM  
T.M.S.: It would be very hard to do but imagine if every protest from the crazies was met with a deafening silence?

Still, what would we then do with ourselves all day and night?


Crazy will always argue with Crazy.

 
CtrlAltDelete [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 03:36:20 AM  
Sh*t I wish he was. But he's not. So STFU.

 
jimmyhaha [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 03:37:30 AM  
Scripture tells us you will be known by your fruits. This explains why I know the Republican party by Ted Haggard, Larry Craig and Mark Foley.

 
T.M.S. [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 03:45:38 AM  
platkat: T.M.S.: It would be very hard to do but imagine if every protest from the crazies was met with a deafening silence?

Still, what would we then do with ourselves all day and night?

Crazy will always argue with Crazy.


Exactly. That's the crux of the biscuit.

And leaves no apostrophe.

 
ninjakirby [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 03:47:22 AM  
Lets see:

Christ:
"Blessed are the poor in spirit,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4Blessed are those who mourn,
for they will be comforted.
5Blessed are the meek,
for they will inherit the earth.
6Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
for they will be filled.
7Blessed are the merciful,
for they will be shown mercy.
8Blessed are the pure in heart,
for they will see God.
9Blessed are the peacemakers,
for they will be called sons of God.
10Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Obama:
-Wants to help the poor.
-Wants to promote a more reserved and contemplative government.
-Mourns the unnecessary deaths and violence of our military aggression.
-Demands justice against those who actually have done us harm.
-Promotes mercy to those who will reform and extend the hand of peace.
-Wishes for peace in all forms.
-Suffers persecution like TFA, so that corrections may be done to fix the country.

Yeah, this dude is totally anti-Christian. He's practically sucking Satans dick while aborting a fetus on live television during the Superbowl Half-Time.

Added bonus:

"Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me."


Christians who feel we 'attack' your faith here on Fark, and in the rest of the world? Blame the idiots in TFA for making you look bad, and blame yourselves for letting them.

 
GreenAdder [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 03:53:08 AM  
i42.tinypic.com
I like him already.

 
sarty [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 03:53:21 AM  
ninjakirby: Lets see:

Christ:
"Blessed are the poor in spirit,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4Blessed are those who mourn,
for they will be comforted.
5Blessed are the meek,
for they will inherit the earth.
6Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
for they will be filled.
7Blessed are the merciful,
for they will be shown mercy.
8Blessed are the pure in heart,
for they will see God.
9Blessed are the peacemakers,
for they will be called sons of God.
10Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Obama:
-Wants to help the poor.
-Wants to promote a more reserved and contemplative government.
-Mourns the unnecessary deaths and violence of our military aggression.
-Demands justice against those who actually have done us harm.
-Promotes mercy to those who will reform and extend the hand of peace.
-Wishes for peace in all forms.
-Suffers persecution like TFA, so that corrections may be done to fix the country.

Yeah, this dude is totally anti-Christian. He's practically sucking Satans dick while aborting a fetus on live television during the Superbowl Half-Time.

Added bonus:

"Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me."

Christians who feel we 'attack' your faith here on Fark, and in the rest of the world? Blame the idiots in TFA for making you look bad, and blame yourselves for letting them.


Nicely done.

 
Hyperbolic Hyperbole [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 04:03:44 AM  
ninjakirby: Christians who feel we 'attack' your faith here on Fark, and in the rest of the world? Blame the idiots in TFA for making you look bad, and blame yourselves for letting them.

I don't feel that the precepts of Jesus (those things you laid out in your post and a few other thingies) are generally attacked (or attackable, really) as much as the poor application of those ideas. And

 
platkat [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 04:05:03 AM  
T.M.S.: Exactly. That's the crux of the biscuit.

Hot crux biscuits!

 
Meatzilla [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 05:09:47 AM  
i157.photobucket.com

 
pnjunction [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-01-24 06:03:39 AM  
Not tolerating hate crimes? Giving people equal rights to choose their life partners and adopt children regardless of their preferences? Making the military and equal opportunity institution (without making people lie about their preferences)?

Pretty radical stuff. Why can't he take the more reasonable approach and allow discrimination and hate based on texts written thousands of years ago by (by modern-day standards) uncivilized people?

 
pnjunction [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-01-24 06:09:49 AM  
Oh and one other thing:

img205.imageshack.us

I wonder how much he pays to get internet access in his closet. Clearly wants the dick.

 
shivashakti [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 06:15:19 AM  
It's clear Barack Obama has a relationship with Christ...at least it said so in his Facebook status.

 
LonMead 2009-01-24 06:50:20 AM  
"...you will be known by your fruits..."
celebgalz.com

 
Lee Jackson Beauregard 2009-01-24 06:58:02 AM  
img99.imageshack.us

 
burning_bridge 2009-01-24 07:06:50 AM  
"I certainly cannot judge whether or not Barack Obama has a relationship with Christ...However I am anyway."

Fixed.

 
SouthernManDunWrong [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-01-24 07:08:10 AM  
T.M.S.: I think we missed an opportunity here. From the moment Obama took the White house there was obviously going to be unprecedented attacks on his administration.

We all knew this was going to happen. And, to no ones surprise the attacks are as intense as they are absurd.

Parallel to the effort in getting him elected there should have been a movement to all agree to ignore every batshiat crazy network, news outlet, blog and website. It would be very hard to do but imagine if every protest from the crazies was met with a deafening silence?

Still, what would we then do with ourselves all day and night?


Unprecendented attacks? WTF do you call the last 8 years with Bush? a walk in the park?

Dude, get your rose colored glasses back on...

 
Dilbert J. Galt 2009-01-24 07:08:33 AM  
Remember the name Matt Barber. Whenever someone publicly makes the statement: "policies that elevate deviant sexual behaviors and dangerous sexual behaviors that are destructive spiritually, physically and emotionally.....", it's only a matter of time until he's caught in an airport mens room.

 
BobXXL 2009-01-24 07:10:05 AM  
"Be tolerant, you homo"

 
Biological Ali 2009-01-24 07:14:15 AM  
pnjunction: Oh and one other thing:



I wonder how much he pays to get internet access in his closet. Clearly wants the dick.


Conservative activists want the dick. Even when they say 'No', they want the dick.

/obscure?

 
Kumana Wanalaia [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 07:23:53 AM  
So, being the worst president in history with an extreme right wing agenda makes you "a hero, second only to Reagan"; being a moderate progressive without an extreme right wing agenda makes you the anti-christ.

Ok, got it.

 
thisispete [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 07:26:25 AM  
St Francis of Assisi (or some early 20th century French clergyman) disagrees on what a Christian should hope to do:

Lord, make me an instrument of Thy peace;
where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
and where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master,
grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
to be understood, as to understand;
to be loved, as to love;
for it is in giving that we receive,
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.

Amen.

 
CayceP 2009-01-24 07:30:28 AM  
ninjakirby, you stop that right now. We can't have Christians acting like Christians!

 
mamoru [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 08:02:10 AM  
Hyperbolic Hyperbole: ninjakirby: Christians who feel we 'attack' your faith here on Fark, and in the rest of the world? Blame the idiots in TFA for making you look bad, and blame yourselves for letting them.

I don't feel that the precepts of Jesus (those things you laid out in your post and a few other thingies) are generally attacked (or attackable, really) as much as the poor application of those ideas. And


...? And what??

C'mon, man, you can't just leave us hanging like that. :(

 
Walkenstein 2009-01-24 08:11:43 AM  
Christianity=usually a free ticket to show your personal human personality flaw of a yearning to have control over others



this country was not started as a "christian" country, but rather turned into one as a result of the elite rulers' way of conditioning us into submission over time.


anyone that is so dangerous and delusional to need to control others and/or enforce a set of laws that

1.) decide what a woman can or cannot do with something that gestated inside her body and is still physically connected to her by umbilical chord

2.) decide whether a homosexual relationship can exist or not, and/or the couples' ability to bind themselves in a lawful contract be it "marriage" or civil union


3.) decide if circular logic and things unproven by science replace traditional science models and theories rather than added as a side suggestion




= should be shot in the back of the head


problem solved

 
smeegle [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-01-24 08:12:28 AM  
Good grief another self righteous holier than thou thumper. Gee Matt, what dirty little thing do you hide in your closet?

You only want civil rights only for those who "Walk with Christ".
Ya that's the Christian way. NOT

 
Unsung_Hero 2009-01-24 08:12:36 AM  
kmmontandon: Yeah, because the three-thousand year-old oral traditions, superstitions, fables, and tribal customs of a pack of goat-herding, cattle-sacrificing desert primitives should be our moral touchstone.

Actually, a lot of moral values that persist for 3000 years are good ones. We're still wired the same way, so a lot of the same social problems exist despite the radical change in our environment.

You just have to turn ON your brain and filter out the ignorant, wrong-headed, and potentially evil bits. It's still easier than starting from scratch.

 
smeegle [recently expired TotalFark] 2009-01-24 08:20:40 AM  
One entertaining but annoying thing this election has done is to elevate the volume of the whining from the extreme religious right.

Eventually their incessant batshiat bawling will be akin to beating a dead horse. They will be (if not already)be dismissed as neurotic bipolar zealots and thus, ignored.

Sidelined, if you will.
Listen up you crazy evangelical nut cases, people are not buying your rhetoric. Go back to the slime from whence you came.

 
Macinfarker 2009-01-24 08:23:21 AM  
And this is scary because?

 
manduwala 2009-01-24 08:23:27 AM  
thisispete I thought that was Mageret Thatcher?

 
fark2105 [TotalFark] 2009-01-24 08:29:59 AM  
clearly one of the fruits of the spirit is bombing your enemy.

 
Jacobin 2009-01-24 08:37:22 AM  
xtians are known by their fruits?

www.nerve.com

 
ilambiquated 2009-01-24 08:43:30 AM  
I've got a banana in my pocket.

 
ilambiquated 2009-01-24 08:56:35 AM  
ProLurker: Yeah. Scriptures written in by man, in a confusing language. Then interpreted by a different man many years later. Probably nothing in lost in translation though. Right?

RIGHT?


Yeah, and as Nietzsche pointed out "God speaks terrible Greek".

The best example is Mark which was translated from Aramaic (Syriac)into Greek by an Aramaic speaker. That's why he starts all his sentences with "and" -- he doesn't know all the fancy conjunctions Greek is so famous for.

Also his prepositions are all wrong. For example the Aramaic phrase "Walked beside the water" becomes "Walked on the water" in Greek. Then Matthew copied Mark and embellished the story with the thing about Peter trying to walk on the water too.

In the same Aramaic preposition is translated "By the rivers of Babylon, There we sat down and wept, When we remembered Zion."

 
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