No. You're both selling vapor and pipe dreams.

more and more people are finding comfort in astrology

So that's why the Republican base is shrinking...

These people are stupid. Tarot cards are much more accurate, since you actually touch them. They absorb your energy.

I'm a Cancer, so I need to avoid broccoli in March and this week I will meet an interesting stranger.

No, you scam people on a much more personal level.

/If people enjoy it, whatever. Everyone has odd interests

The only star I need to tell the future: The Sun. As long as it keeps coming up in the AM I'm good to go.

I'm gonna die farkin'.

More and more people stupid. Film at 11.

Penny: I'm a Sagittarius, which probably tells you way more than you need to know.

Sheldon: Yes, it tells us that you participate in the mass cultural delusion that the sun's apparent position relative to arbitrarily defined constellations at the time of your birth somehow affects your personality.

Penny: (puzzled) Participate in the what?

\Big Bang Theory

Recently, one of my college buddies was bemoaning the "retrograde of Mercury." I was astonished! He's a geologist, and he's bought into astrology!

My head assplode.

TEACH THE CONTROVERSY!

"What I do is about as far removed from the horoscopes you read in newspapers as you can imagine things that could apply to anyone."


/more like it

Anyone else catch Apocalypse Week on the History Channel?

Addicting! I doubt that our cell phones will stop working and we'll all starve/freeze/be slashed with meteor remains/kill ourselves off/die in floods...

Everything about my life makes sense now.

Well, yeah. The daily newspapers horoscopes are free. What makes you believe your stuff is better? Just asking. Document with links please.

It makes as much sense as superstition, which is to say none.

This includes you Christianity.

Today: Be thoughtful toward friends. It is possible someone will pay you a compliment. If you normally wear a tie, consider trying something different. Tonight: eat dinner and watch TV.

I'm a Capricorn, which means I excel at Twister, never finish the meat at the end of chicken bones, and will always lend you $5 if you ask in French. I can say words like "loveable", "sexual", and "industrial" without looking at my fingers.

Actually, I find that my sign describes me. But only the negative characteristics.

Asshole, arrogant, self-absorbed, profligate spender.

does not approve

No one who has ever been inside a church has any business making fun of astrology.

My grandmother used to do the really precise ones based on time of birth and latitude as well as Date. They were fascinating star charts to look at whether you followed astrology or not.

If you believe in astrology, please learn about Cold Reading before some carny hack tricks you out of your money.

For me it's auguries or nothing. Other forms of divination are a sham. . . .

I'm one of those idiots who take fortune cookies more serious than anything found in a newspaper. But those things are pretty stupid.

I got one once that said "People like being around you". And whoever started the whole "in bed" thing needs to die. And if they're already dead, dig up the body and burn it. If the body is already burned, photos of them should be found and scanned into the computer and photoshopped on other people's bodies performing horrific acts with a pickle jar, a grapefruit, and a tire iron. These pictures will then be circulated online for all eternity or the tubes finally plug up, whichever comes first.

The Power of Positive Drinking: Anyone else catch Apocalypse Week on the History Channel?

Addicting! I doubt that our cell phones will stop working and we'll all starve/freeze/be slashed with meteor remains/kill ourselves off/die in floods...


Unfortunately I saw the program guide, my beloved History channel has become Weekly World News TV, apparently nothing can escape the lowest common denominator rule.

/If you need me, I will be drowning my sorrow in my books.

lerry: I'm one of those idiots who take fortune cookies more serious than anything found in a newspaper. But those things are pretty stupid.

I got one once that said "People like being around you". And whoever started the whole "in bed" thing needs to die. And if they're already dead, dig up the body and burn it. If the body is already burned, photos of them should be found and scanned into the computer and photoshopped on other people's bodies performing horrific acts with a pickle jar, a grapefruit, and a tire iron. These pictures will then be circulated online for all eternity or the tubes finally plug up, whichever comes first...in bed

I'm a Virgo. I cry on demand and am allergic to compound suffixes. On the third Tuesday of any month with a prime number, I excrete gelatinous toxins from my elbows. Children can't see me and I absorb happiness through my hair.

I like horoscopes that get really specific:

"Today, Arnie Greene, wearing a pullover sweater and faded blue jeans, will stab you to death with a butcher knife as you're walking to work"

FTA:
"And yes, for every reputable astrologer or certified psychic (and both exist)"

Urgh, what a terrible article. Why can't you see a report on these things that's actually objective, dispassionate, fair and reasoned - and by that I mean calling BS on the whole thing?

FTFA: It's a detailed look at all aspects of a person's life, and then we examine future courses of action or ways in which that person can help themselves change their life.'


So in other words, she works very hard to predict the...present.

I'd be happy too if I could make a boatload of money selling this bullshiat to idiots.

fanbladesaresharp: The only star I need to tell the future: The Sun. As long as it keeps coming up in the AM I'm good to go.

'Katrina-Like' solar space storm expected in 2012. EVERYBODY ANALOG

bicentennialman: Actually, I find that my sign describes me. But only the negative characteristics.

Asshole, arrogant, self-absorbed, profligate spender.

Pfft.
I could have told you that.

Remember the following magic phrase:

You have a need for other people to like and admire you, and yet you tend to be critical of yourself. While you have some personality weaknesses you are generally able to compensate for them.

You have considerable unused capacity that you have not turned to your advantage. Disciplined and self-controlled on the outside, you tend to be worrisome and insecure on the inside.

At times you have serious doubts as to whether you have made the right decision or done the right thing. You prefer a certain amount of change and variety and become dissatisfied when hemmed in by restrictions and limitations. You also pride yourself as an independent thinker; and do not accept others' statements without satisfactory proof.

But you have found it unwise to be too frank in revealing yourself to others. At times you are extroverted, affable, and sociable, while at other times you are introverted, wary, and reserved. Some of your aspirations tend to be rather unrealistic.

PFC Obvious: lerry: I'm one of those idiots who take fortune cookies more serious than anything found in a newspaper. But those things are pretty stupid.

I got one once that said "People like being around you". And whoever started the whole "in bed" thing needs to die. And if they're already dead, dig up the body and burn it. If the body is already burned, photos of them should be found and scanned into the computer and photoshopped on other people's bodies performing horrific acts with a pickle jar, a grapefruit, and a tire iron. These pictures will then be circulated online for all eternity or the tubes finally plug up, whichever comes first...in bed

*clap clap clap*

Fortune cookies would be worthless were it not for "in bed".

PFC Obvious: lerry: I'm one of those idiots who take fortune cookies more serious than anything found in a newspaper. But those things are pretty stupid.

I got one once that said "People like being around you". And whoever started the whole "in bed" thing needs to die. And if they're already dead, dig up the body and burn it. If the body is already burned, photos of them should be found and scanned into the computer and photoshopped on other people's bodies performing horrific acts with a pickle jar, a grapefruit, and a tire iron. These pictures will then be circulated online for all eternity or the tubes finally plug up, whichever comes first...in bed

...and burned.

I'm a Libra. Tomorrow I will probably ingest gluten and talk to someone wearing socks. This is a good month for me to play the lottery, but I will miscalculate my checking account by a decimal place. If you hug my knees while singing a Kiss song, an angel will remember your zip code forever.

You will face challenges today.

Well a duh.

I used to take part of an astronomy class I taught to discuss astrology and answer questions. I would hand out the same horoscope to everyone in the class, but each one would be labeled with one of the 12 signs and distributed appropriately (EVERYONE knows their sign, by the way, in the U.S.). Then I'd poll the class and see the level of agreement with the statement "This horoscope describes me well."

It was full of general statements that apply to everyone like "I seem confident to others at times, but I am not always." Duh.

Most students thought it was accurate or very accurate. Then I read the horoscope aloud and asked everyone to raise their hand if I had read theirs. Lots of surprised looks, followed by light bulbs, when everyone in the room raised their hands.

I rarely got very many questions. Don't know if that was a bias, and that astrology-inclined people don't take astronomy class, or just more generally that students in large lecture classes are afraid of asking questions, especially after this sort of demonstration.

Have to add that this sort of article sucks. It had potential, reporting on an actual experience, but it definitely skewed to silliness. I mean, beware of the charlatans who don't have real credentials? And everything that sounded good about her experience seemed to have nothing to do with astrology!

It's a bit long, but it's fun to see Rani debunking this stuff back in the early 80s.

James Randi promotes Flim Flam, pt 1
James Randi promotes Flim Flam, pt 2
(Linkinatious popitilation.)

Do watch the end, at least...

darknys: Rani

What the hell? Preview fail.

VTSquire: Remember the following magic phrase:

You have a need for other people to like and admire you, and yet you tend to be critical of yourself. While you have some personality weaknesses you are generally able to compensate for them.

You have considerable unused capacity that you have not turned to your advantage. Disciplined and self-controlled on the outside, you tend to be worrisome and insecure on the inside.

At times you have serious doubts as to whether you have made the right decision or done the right thing. You prefer a certain amount of change and variety and become dissatisfied when hemmed in by restrictions and limitations. You also pride yourself as an independent thinker; and do not accept others' statements without satisfactory proof.

But you have found it unwise to be too frank in revealing yourself to others. At times you are extroverted, affable, and sociable, while at other times you are introverted, wary, and reserved. Some of your aspirations tend to be rather unrealistic.

That's eerie. How could you possibly know that about me?
I mean, it's not like the above description applies to 99.9% of everybody.

I think that the reason astrology, psychics, and other assorted nonsense is so popular is due to the fact that everybody thinks that they're so god-damned special, and that their fears, goals, and desires couldn't possibly be common to a large number of people...

The only use I have for astrology is that dumb girls get hot when I tell them I'm a Scorpio. Apparently we're the sleaziest of the bunch.

Maddox to the rescue!

/I took a lot of "comfort" in that article while dating a Wiccan girl who was also into astrology

Mugato: The only use I have for astrology is that dumb girls get hot when I tell them I'm a Scorpio. Apparently we're the sleaziest of the bunch.

I've found that young women (late teens to mid-20's) are most likely to believe in astrology, psychics etc.
Does anyone concur?

brewssuds: I've found that young women (late teens to mid-20's) are most likely to believe in astrology, psychics etc.
Does anyone concur?

I concur.

Pribar: The Power of Positive Drinking: Anyone else catch Apocalypse Week on the History Channel?

Addicting! I doubt that our cell phones will stop working and we'll all starve/freeze/be slashed with meteor remains/kill ourselves off/die in floods...


Unfortunately I saw the program guide, my beloved History channel has become Weekly World News TV, apparently nothing can escape the lowest common denominator rule.

/If you need me, I will be drowning my sorrow in my books.

Oh holy crap, THIS! Thank Venus for being in the 6th House that History International is still someone decent.

boobsrgood: I'm a Virgo. I cry on demand and am allergic to compound suffixes. On the third Tuesday of any month with a prime number, I excrete gelatinous toxins from my elbows. Children can't see me and I absorb happiness through my hair.

You know who else can absorb things through his hair?



/very obscure.

As I was being born, Aldebaran was being occulted by the moon.

This is why I like to kick astrologers and psychics in the nuts or give them titty twisters.

/they should have seen it coming.

Astrology? This line from Adam Samler in "The Waterboy" sums an astrologery up nicely:

Yeah, m-maybe...
by leaving her predictions
vague and generalized,
there's less of a chance of someone
findin' out she's a phoney.