FARK.com: (4115491) Fark's 2008 Headline of the Year contest: Politics (details in thread)

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		Fark's 2008 Headline of the Year contest: Politics (details in thread) (fark.com)		129
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posted to Main » on 31 Dec 2008 at 3:02 PM |

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Unfreakable

2008-12-31 01:07:36 PM

Welcome to Fark's 2008 Headline of the Year contest for the politics subtab. The results are final for our Headline of the Year contest for the main page, but it's still up if you missed it.

We've winnowed it down to some of our personal favorites from this category, but now it's your opportunity to crown the champ. Happy voting, and here are the nominees:

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:12:20 PM

Bush tours Iowa to find out what Row vs. Wade is all about

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3681675

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:12:58 PM

Huckabee scores first in West Virginia, presumably with a relative

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3378403

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:13:27 PM

McCain's plane aborts landing. Pro-life conservatives immediately switch their votes to Obama

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3995568

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:13:54 PM

Alaska's black population says he has felt ignored by Palin

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3953858

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:14:18 PM

Bin Laden to release video titled "The response will be what you see, not what you hear." Next video to be romantic comedy entitled "Jihad me at hello"

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3479300

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:14:45 PM

Florida legislature apologizes for slavery, but neglects to apologize for 2000 election, Anita Bryant, Elian Gonzalez's family, the Florida Marlins ownership, old drivers with their left-turn signals on, or Steve Spurrier

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3494513

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:16:06 PM

3rd Grader becomes mayor for a day, resigns in shame after accusations of cooties

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3468892

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:16:39 PM

In 2008, Ben Stein and conservative lawmakers introduced a bill in Tallahassee in an effort to challenge the teaching of... Anyone? Anyone?

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3462947

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:17:38 PM

Tony Schwartz, creator of LBJ's "Daisy" ad, has died. Condolences in five... four... three... two... one...

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3674934

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:18:10 PM

Religious conservatives hoping the issue of homosexual marriage can help the GOP come from behind

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3718099

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:18:36 PM

Ted Stevens fate to be decided by a jury of his peers. Still no word on where they found 12 giant assholes

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3961402

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:19:01 PM

The Spendinator announces that California faces a $20 billion deficit through June 2009, leaving it in the same fiscal position as many of the other Mexican states

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3569822

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:19:24 PM

Tony Blair's portrait has been added to the Parliamentary art collection. Oddly, he is not pictured sitting on Bush's lap

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3560026

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:19:51 PM

Israeli Secret Service refuses to assist U.S. Secret Service in protecting Jimmy Carter. Carter won't be taken hostage by Hamas anyway, since they can't afford to pay the U.S. enough to take him back

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3537677

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:20:19 PM

Not one to stall for time, Larry Craig intends to tap out his memoirs

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3636991

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:20:46 PM

Leftist college-town kids attempt to form world's largest peace sign, but are unsure where the hammer goes in relationship to the sickle

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3688880

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:21:14 PM

Barack Obama spending the evening at Hillary Clinton's house. Agenda to include a pint of Ben & Jerry's, a good cry, and a spirited pillowfight

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3651611

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:24:30 PM

Condoleezza Rice knows whO she's BAcking in the caMpaign but won't sAy

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3748085

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:24:58 PM

Iran says Shahab-3 missiles have a range greater than the reported 2,000 km, and will be happy to prove it once they get their Photoshop upgrade

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3734676

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:25:21 PM

Iran's finger is always "on the trigger", says Hossein Salami of the Revolutionary Guard, indicating that their beef with Israel is far from over, and you never sausage an arsenal anywhere south of New Delhi. Wiener

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3725079

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:25:47 PM

"Obama tax plan will retard growth, job creation" as opposed to Palin's plan of job growth and retard creation

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3982093

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:26:19 PM

CNN says no thanks to Obama's half-hour advertisement, will soon witness the firepower of his fully armed and operational battlestation

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3979710

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:26:49 PM

Obama kids getting a new puppy. Considering a Russian Wolfhound and keeping it in back yard so they can see it from their house

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3997625

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:27:17 PM

Panel finds West Virginia University improperly granted degree to governor's daughter, citing she sent in only 38 of the 40 boxtops required for an MBA

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3561429

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:27:42 PM

Van full of mental patients crashes near Pittsburgh. In other news, the Ron Paul rally has been cancelled due to poor attendance

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3561518

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:28:07 PM

Putin saves a TV crew from a tiger. Offers to save McCain from that Alaskan cougar that's been following him for a few days

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3841249

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:28:30 PM

Anonymous package of bacon closes congressman's office, which marks the first time in history a politician ran away from pork

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3926033

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:28:59 PM

♫ Super California debt is something quite tremendous / Seven billion dollar budget shortfall is stupendous / Governator warns that short term outlook is horrendous / Super California debt is something quite tremendous ♫

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3921643/a>

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:29:31 PM

US ship fires on Iranian boat in the Persian Gulf of Tonkin

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3563504

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:30:02 PM

Kucinich quits race to spend more time with his family. His incredibly hot, redheaded, gorgeous family

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=3351943

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:30:34 PM

Obama officially names physicist Steven Chu as Energy Secretary. That's Δx/Δy you can believe in

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=4086536

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:31:10 PM

I am the very model of a modern Major-General, The very first Hispanic to hold this post quite venerable, I think I was a shoe-in for this post very historical, all thanks to Arizona's Governor Napolitano

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=4040984

Headline of the Year candidate

2008-12-31 01:31:43 PM

Minnesota recount still in progress, officially surpassing Stuart Saves His Family as the longest, most tedious thing Al Franken is responsible for

http://forums.fark.com/cgi/fark/comments.pl?IDLink=4062274

Mistah Scrotie

2008-12-31 03:10:24 PM

Awww... no Obama and Edwards to Hillary: "Suck my caucus: (new window)

DinsdalePiranha

2008-12-31 03:13:05 PM

I hope the PITA and HotY admins weren't hurt when their chairs fell to the left.

serial_crusher

2008-12-31 03:15:21 PM

Link for Δx/Δy goes to wrong article. And since I posted my witty comment to that thread way too late last time around, here it is again:

It should have been Δx/Δt, because change takes time.

harryjrf

2008-12-31 03:18:10 PM

Props to the "create retards" headline. I vote Republican and I laughed my ass off.

coco ebert

2008-12-31 03:18:10 PM

Retard creation is so full of win. Why wasn't that in the running for headline of the year?

HappyFarker

2008-12-31 03:19:44 PM

Well we all know who is going to win this one.

"Obama tax plan will retard growth, job creation" as opposed to Palin's plan of job growth and retard creation

Cyberluddite

2008-12-31 03:22:19 PM

I predict that the "retard growth, job creation" one will win this one in a landslide with no recount necessary. As it should.

Balchinian

2008-12-31 03:22:23 PM

Religious conservatives hoping the issue of homosexual marriage can help the GOP come from behind

My personal nomination for HotY overall.

V. M. Molotov

2008-12-31 03:24:38 PM

I bet there will be a lot of schadenfreude for all the losing headlines after "retard creation" headline wins Political HotY

BMulligan

2008-12-31 03:26:38 PM

The "retard" line is an immediate crowd pleaser, of course, but on the basis of craftsmanship alone I have to give the nod to "♫ Super California debt...."

portnoyd

2008-12-31 03:29:46 PM

Panel finds West Virginia University improperly granted degree to governor's daughter, citing she sent in only 38 of the 40 boxtops required for an MBA

I lol'd out loud at that one.

After reading each thread, I can say that the category HOTY headlines blow away the overall HOTY contest.

Antidamascus

2008-12-31 03:30:16 PM

These are all terrible headlines :(

The politics was so full of win during the election.

bobbette

2008-12-31 03:35:31 PM

I don't actually find these that funny... so I'm going to go ahead and nominate one of my own...

2008-10-18 Obvious [Politics] Political scientists discover robocalls are useless and annoying. Still no attack ads for cancer

ardean

2008-12-31 03:37:10 PM

Can I use my "Get out of making fun of retards free" card now?

BMulligan

2008-12-31 03:37:25 PM

By the way - I submitted this with a funnier headline.