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(Stuff) Amusing Teenage couple caught having sex on middle school sports field, face jail sentences and lifelong registration as sex offenders. Just kidding - it wasn't the puritan U.S., so they were let off without charges   (stuff.co.nz) divider line 174
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WTFDYW [TotalFark] 2008-12-28 06:31:18 PM  
I'm glad they got off easy ;)

 
SilentStrider [TotalFark] 2008-12-28 08:25:10 PM  
WTFDYW: I'm glad they got off easy ;)

*ba dum TSSSH!*

 
Hollywood Cole [TotalFark] 2008-12-28 08:45:10 PM  
WTFDYW: I'm glad they got off easy ;)

Thread's over.


*turn out the light on your way out.*

 
dahmers love zombie [TotalFark] 2008-12-28 08:54:56 PM  
Oh, sure...that's just the start of it, though. Before you know it, the boy will be involved in a complex plot to ruin the homecoming parade, and the girl will turn up pregnant, one thing will lead to another, and before you know it, her father will end up in a pile of bleacher rubble with his thumb up the dean's wife's ass.

So don't give me that "victimless crime" stuff. It's all connected.

 
PC LOAD LETTER [TotalFark] 2008-12-28 09:11:53 PM  
WTFDYW: I'm glad they got off easy ;)

You didn't even give the fledgling thread a chance to walk, did you?

 
Snarfangel [TotalFark] 2008-12-28 10:24:09 PM  
In the U.S., they would have thrown the book at them -- illegal use of hands, encroachment, illegal formation, illegal motion, too many men on the field, holding, intentional grounding, and possibly spearing.

 
ThatGuyGreg [TotalFark] 2008-12-28 10:45:45 PM  
Snarfangel: In the U.S., they would have thrown the book at them -- illegal use of hands, encroachment, illegal formation, illegal motion, too many men on the field, holding, intentional grounding, and possibly spearing.

Don't forget "Giving her the business"

 
mamoru [TotalFark] 2008-12-28 10:58:28 PM  
Snarfangel: In the U.S., they would have thrown the book at them -- illegal use of hands, encroachment, illegal formation, illegal motion, too many men on the field, holding, intentional grounding, and possibly spearing.

No face-mask?

 
JesusTheChrist 2008-12-28 11:18:05 PM  
This is why parents should allow kids to have sex at home. Under their supervision. Easier to record and sell on the internet that way, too.

 
austinosphere 2008-12-28 11:20:18 PM  
Yes.... We're so puritanical(sp?).

Everything's relative I suppose.

 
DSan 2008-12-28 11:21:29 PM  
Pics?

 
laars 2008-12-28 11:22:27 PM  
What friggin doucher wrote that headline, if I was charged everytime I got caught banging or spanking it I would be on death row.

 
FightDirector 2008-12-28 11:24:00 PM  
It's kinda sad that, without the stinger at the end, that headline is still completely believable.

Also, came for the convoluted Animal House reference...leaves quickly and satisfied. Like those teens.

/tip the waitress!

 
fanbladesaresharp 2008-12-28 11:24:09 PM  
PC LOAD LETTER: WTFDYW: I'm glad they got off easy ;)

You didn't even give the fledgling thread a chance to walk, did you?


There's always sloppy seconds.

 
fanbladesaresharp 2008-12-28 11:25:01 PM  
JesusTheChrist: This is why parents should allow kids to have sex at home. Under their supervision. Easier to record and sell on the internet that way, too.

Might want to rethink that one there.

 
Ashtrey 2008-12-28 11:26:50 PM  
austinosphere: Yes.... We're so puritanical(sp?).

Everything's relative I suppose.


Dude, we were founded by people so uptight they got kicked out of ENGLAND!

 
Listerine 2008-12-28 11:26:51 PM  
They should be charged.

 
jake3988 2008-12-28 11:26:53 PM  
Mr Deadman warned the red-faced youngsters to pick a more discreet location for future trysts, but let them off without charges.
===================

Why the FARK can't the U.S. be like this? Seriously?

Enjoy sex, but find someplace else next time. Kthxbye. Simple.

But no, in the U.S. they'd throw them in jail register them as sex offenders, expel them from school, and force them to enroll in sex ed classes, etc etc etc.

 
the_rhino 2008-12-28 11:28:50 PM  
My fiance and I were bored one day, so we decided to have sex in the back of my car for the fun of it. So we go to a local military base (military family) and i park it on a desereted plot, out of the way. No sooner had we started, some jerkass pulls his truck near us and unloads his quad.

Moral of the story: get tinted windows.

 
dahmers love zombie [TotalFark] 2008-12-28 11:30:46 PM  
the_rhino: My fiance and I were bored one day, so we decided to have sex in the back of my car for the fun of it. So we go to a local military base (military family) and i park it on a desereted plot, out of the way. No sooner had we started, some jerkass pulls his truck near us and unloads his quad.

Moral of the story: get tinted windows.


Sounds messy. Y'all must have been pretty hot looking for him to go off that fas...wait, was that a euphemism or not?

 
ph0rk 2008-12-28 11:31:24 PM  
the_rhino: My fiance and I were bored one day, so we decided to have sex in the back of my car for the fun of it. So we go to a local military base (military family) and i park it on a desereted plot, out of the way. No sooner had we started, some jerkass pulls his truck near us and unloads his quad.



Excuse me, but what?

 
deadapostle [TotalFark] 2008-12-28 11:31:46 PM  
This story brings back fond mammories.

 
sh00ter8 2008-12-28 11:32:02 PM  
You really think that we're Puritans over here? I guess that you have never been to Mardi Gras.

 
mdbirt 2008-12-28 11:34:15 PM  
Sex makes baby Jebus cry!

 
Lamune_Baba 2008-12-28 11:34:46 PM  
jake3988: Why the FARK can't the U.S. be like this? Seriously?

I think it's all that freedom getting in the way.

 
Voodoo_Stu 2008-12-28 11:34:54 PM  
FTFA:"It wasn't just discreet either," he said.

"Their pants were on the other side of the field. They were really enjoying themselves."


Good for them.

/trying not to be bitter about having wasted my youth.

 
That coward David Lopan 2008-12-28 11:35:40 PM  
i249.photobucket.com

Approves

 
deadapostle [TotalFark] 2008-12-28 11:35:45 PM  
My ex-girlfriend and I were bored one day so we decided to have sex in a park. So we go to a local nature conservatory (upperclass suberban family) and I park her on a desereted log, out of the way. No sooner had we started, some jerkass comes walking by with his dog and unloads his quad.

Moral of the story: find a more desereted log.

 
ph0rk 2008-12-28 11:37:55 PM  
I unload my quad at you, sir.

My quad, I unload it.


/No really, wtf does it mean?

 
Johnny English 2008-12-28 11:38:58 PM  
"Their pants were on the other side of the field. They were really enjoying themselves."

www.bbc.co.uk

 
voyvf 2008-12-28 11:39:36 PM  
sh00ter8: You really think that we're Puritans over here?

Yes. If the rest of the bible belt would embrace such frivolous activities as seen during the Fat Tuesday celebration in NOLA, I'd change my mind.

/Doubt it'll happen this century.
//Probably not the next, either.

 
yogaFLAME [TotalFark] 2008-12-28 11:40:30 PM  
Why don't you just unload your quad over there.

 
zalasur [TotalFark] 2008-12-28 11:40:57 PM  
the_rhino: My fiance and I were bored one day, so we decided to have sex in the back of my car for the fun of it. So we go to a local military base (military family) and i park it on a desereted plot, out of the way. No sooner had we started, some jerkass pulls his truck near us and unloads his quad.

Moral of the story: get tinted windows.


Mm-hm. Yes, I see. Interesting.

Please continue!

 
Mr. Gunn 2008-12-28 11:41:05 PM  
deadapostle: My ex-girlfriend and I were bored one day so we decided to have sex in a park. So we go to a local nature conservatory (upperclass suberban family) and I park her on a desereted log, out of the way. No sooner had we started, some jerkass comes walking by with his dog and unloads his quad.

Moral of the story: find a more desereted deseretrereted log.


FTFY

/leran to spell, moran!

 
McSherrie 2008-12-28 11:41:22 PM  
*ponders visiting the local high school football field for her next daliance*

*remembers that she lives in the USA*

Ah, fark it...

/Mardi Gras ain't got nothing on Carnival

 
taurusowner 2008-12-28 11:41:35 PM  
sh00ter8: You really think that we're Puritans over here? I guess that you have never been to Mardi Gras.

Or to college.

 
Faddy 2008-12-28 11:41:48 PM  
sh00ter8: You really think that we're Puritans over here?

You want to bet on that? Oh wait you can't because your government put heavy restrictions on gambling.

 
the_rhino 2008-12-28 11:42:17 PM  
zalasur: the_rhino: My fiance and I were bored one day, so we decided to have sex in the back of my car for the fun of it. So we go to a local military base (military family) and i park it on a desereted plot, out of the way. No sooner had we started, some jerkass pulls his truck near us and unloads his quad.

Moral of the story: get tinted windows.

Mm-hm. Yes, I see. Interesting.

Please continue!


We got partly dressed and we moved the car to behind the abandoned school and parked behind it.

 
Pump Action Jackson 2008-12-28 11:42:23 PM  
laars: What friggin doucher wrote that headline, if I was charged everytime I got caught banging or spanking it I would be on death row.

FTFY

 
darth_nick23 2008-12-28 11:42:44 PM  
quad? like an atv? is this some new meme?

 
starmeeting 2008-12-28 11:44:49 PM  
A while back I was unloading my quad near a military base and saw a couple going to town in the back of a car. I let it slide and decided to take my quad to a local park, but I saw another couple wailing on each other on a deserted log. What a day.

 
now now plz git ur farks str8 2008-12-28 11:45:34 PM  
Happens all the time. We just don't have as many "concerned citizens" reporting it in the USA.

 
onyxia 2008-12-28 11:45:46 PM  
jake3988: Why the FARK can't the U.S. be like this? Seriously?

Enjoy sex, but find someplace else next time. Kthxbye. Simple.

But no, in the U.S. they'd throw them in jail register them as sex offenders, expel them from school, and force them to enroll in sex ed classes, etc etc etc.


Or they'd get a misdemeanor for public indecency, pay a fine and go on their way. But don't let the actual law get in the way of your red faced ranting.

 
farkinsinism 2008-12-28 11:46:15 PM  
No sooner had we started, some jerkass pulls his truck near us and unloads his quad.

How didn't you notice when you parked next to one of these?

outdoors.mainetoday.com

 
deadapostle [TotalFark] 2008-12-28 11:50:03 PM  
Mr. Gunn: FTFY

/leran to spell, moran!


I was playing with the original poster's misspellings. I actually spelled deserted incorrectly twice and also spelled suburban with an "e". I really hope the "unload your quad" meme sticks.

 
John_Rat_Safari 2008-12-28 11:51:05 PM  
Quadding isn't just messy but also dangerous if you don't have the right protection.

 
ph0rk 2008-12-28 11:51:51 PM  
i116.photobucket.com


He'll keep an eye on your quad.

 
Savoir-Faire 2008-12-28 11:52:46 PM  
Man, all this sex talk makes me want to go unload my quad. I'll be in my bunk.

 
MrGronk 2008-12-28 11:55:10 PM  
This is New Zealand, remember - it probably made the news because both sex partners were humans.

 
farfigneugan [TotalFark] 2008-12-28 11:55:33 PM  
damn. made it to the bottom of the thread and I still don't know what "unloading his quad" means.

 
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