Stuff.co.nz is just a "New Zealand website" :(

Fark = Stuff.co.nz + Cracked.com

Napier chef Sarron John Malot led the way when he was dubbed "the Piddler on the Roof" after being caught on a security camera urinating into a parking meter on July 5.

Is that like peeing on the urinal cake?.

They said in a statement: "He pees up in the air in a big arc, so it goes in the coin slot and out the hole where people collect their tickets."

Sniper pee?.

FTA:Napier chef Sarron John Malot led the way when he was dubbed "the Piddler on the Roof" after being caught on a security camera urinating into a parking meter on July 5.

He said he had been out with friends and wanted to pee. When they wouldn't let him do it against their car, he chose the parking machine instead.

Police dubbed him The Piddler on the Roof because the meter was on the second-floor.

They said in a statement: "He pees up in the air in a big arc, so it goes in the coin slot and out the hole where people collect their tickets."

Malot pleaded guilty in court to a charge of intentionally damaging the meter. He was offered diversion by police but had to pay $200 to the Napier City Council.

I'm sorry, but that is full of win. He proved to everyone how much he hated the things by pissing on it.

"It was growing at the base of a table, likely to have started life after someone lit up a joint and discarded the butt there"

That's some fine reportin' there, Skippy. If this was true I think there would be a forest of ganja behind my high school

cdawrld:

That's some fine reportin' there, Skippy. If this was true I think there would be a forest of ganja behind my high school

Did you smoke crappy weed full of seeds too?

The "Piddler on the Roof" guy earns the Urination Marksman merit badge. All charges will henceforth be dropped.

FTFA: Stupid is as stupid does in crim world

Is this intentional funny irony, or is the author this dumb? Judging by how poorly the first paragraph is written, I'm leaning towards the latter.

yyaskyy: cdawrld:

That's some fine reportin' there, Skippy. If this was true I think there would be a forest of ganja behind my high school

Did you smoke crappy weed full of seeds too?

It was high school, everyone did. At least at first.

Ashtrey: yyaskyy: cdawrld:

That's some fine reportin' there, Skippy. If this was true I think there would be a forest of ganja behind my high school

Did you smoke crappy weed full of seeds too?

It was high school, everyone did. At least at first.

Thats why everyone had the Peter Frampton Comes Alive double album.
You dumped your bag at the top of the album that was held at an angle and the seeds would fall to the bottom.

Oh the joys of growing up with Mexican brown weed.

StephieN.M.: FTFA: Stupid is as stupid does in crim world

Is this intentional funny irony, or is the author this dumb? Judging by how poorly the first paragraph is written, I'm leaning towards the latter.

I am 95% sure "crim" is an intentional kiwi-abbreviated version of "criminal" rather than an unintentional misspelling of "crime", if that is what you are asking.

Kiwis abbreviate everything.

mtylerjr: StephieN.M.: FTFA: Stupid is as stupid does in crim world

I am 95% sure "crim" is an intentional kiwi-abbreviated version of "criminal" rather than an unintentional misspelling of "crime", if that is what you are asking.

Kiwis abbreviate everything.

Indee

3marius2: Kiwis abbreviate everything.

Indee

Little known fact: Kiwi is short for Kiiiiiwi, I can't believe I sailed from a tiny lil island on the other side of the world just to end up on another, tinier island full of scary people with pointy sticks.

mtylerjr: I am 95% sure "crim" is an intentional kiwi-abbreviated version of "criminal" rather than an unintentional misspelling of "crime", if that is what you are asking.

Kiwis abbreviate everything.

You are correct, sir.

Think about how your local paper writes stories, especially sports ones. There's more local jargon and slang in there than you think.

mtylerjr:Kiwis abbreviate everything.

No kidding.
truckie - truck driver
sparky - electrician
chippie - carpenter

That and they have this habit of throwing away the "r" on the end of any words. So, a "Super Center" becomes a "Supa Centa" although they say it "seen-tah".

If they weren't such lovely people, I'd accuse them of talking baby talk. And they might send me back to Vermont.

yyaskyy: cdawrld:

That's some fine reportin' there, Skippy. If this was true I think there would be a forest of ganja behind my high school

Did you smoke crappy weed full of seeds too?

For my senior prank the week before graduation I seeded the entire school. I had the seeds from several kilos of pot. From what I heard, they had little pot plants sprouting up all over the place. Good times.

/That was over twenty years ago so I can't be charged now

Submitted this article a week ago with better headline.

That's some fine reportin' there, Skippy.

Uhm - that there is a Kiwi