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(Washington Post) Asinine Minnesota recount still in progress, officially surpassing Stuart Saves His Family as the longest, most tedious thing Al Franken is responsible for   (washingtonpost.com) divider line 82
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Lionel Mandrake [TotalFark] 2008-12-05 01:52:09 AM  
Yeah, when the margin of victory is razor-thin and not-yet certain, shouldn't the Democrat just give up and let the Republican have it? Franken is such a dick.

 
robsul82 [TotalFark] 2008-12-05 01:53:31 AM  
Wasn't this a mandated by state law recount?

 
RemyDuron 2008-12-05 02:14:34 AM  
Yeah, Al Franken wrote the law about mandatory recounts, you know.

-1

 
puffy999 [TotalFark] 2008-12-05 02:16:36 AM  
Al Franken is still a worthless douche.

It just turns out that his opponent is a bigger douche.

 
AboveTheStarsOfGod 2008-12-05 02:17:40 AM  
I'm pulling for Franken, douche that he is, but let's give credit where it's due: That was a fine headline.

 
holiday_inn_in_cambodia 2008-12-05 02:26:29 AM  
can someone explain to me why the official results from the sec state of minnesota's website says Franken is leading by 5,000 votes, when every news organization is parroting that Coleman is leading by 300?

/franken is not a douche; as far as I know he has never been inserted into a woman's vajiggle in order to clean it out

 
whidbey [TotalFark] 2008-12-05 02:27:29 AM  
Sure must piss off a lot of people knowing he's got a shot at the Senate.

Not me, but you're obviously not happy about it, now are you?

 
BitwiseShift 2008-12-05 02:31:41 AM  
Saxby Chambliss ought to stop by and help the recount. After all, he has twice the arms and many more legs than many of his opponents. And there are probably some little Minnesota girls he hasn't groped, but no by his lack of effort. But if there's anything rigged about the election it will pale in comparison to Saxby's supernatural aura and so no one will notice. Norm and Saxby, togther, like Darth and Volde.

 
RminusQ [TotalFark] 2008-12-05 02:33:58 AM  
holiday_inn_in_cambodia: can someone explain to me why the official results from the sec state of minnesota's website says Franken is leading by 5,000 votes, when every news organization is parroting that Coleman is leading by 300?

/franken is not a douche; as far as I know he has never been inserted into a woman's vajiggle in order to clean it out


The Minnesota SOS is reporting those votes which have been recounted, which represent 99% of the precincts. Counting only those votes that have been accepted, Franken leads by 4658. When these precincts were counted the first time, Franken led by 4648. Thus, Franken has gained 10 votes. If the remaining precincts result in no change, Coleman's 215-vote lead would become a 205-vote win.

The difference between the 200 and 300 is because of different upstate statuses. The other HUGE problem with this logic is that it treats challenged ballots as non-existant, when most likely they are frivolous and will by and large become legit votes. Coleman has challenged 114 more ballots, so Franken is very likely to gain a number of votes once the challenged ballots are counted (beginning next week IIRC).

 
Bucky Katt [TotalFark] 2008-12-05 02:34:57 AM  
whidbey: Sure must piss off a lot of people knowing he's got a money shot at the Senate.


ftfy

 
OMG Socialism 2008-12-05 02:36:07 AM  
Democracy is asinine now?

 
Gyrfalcon [TotalFark] 2008-12-05 02:36:24 AM  
Dear Mr. Franken,
Take a lesson from a finer and more gracious loser, Senator John McCain, and just give up already, okay?

Thanks.

 
RemyDuron 2008-12-05 02:39:12 AM  
holiday_inn_in_cambodia: can someone explain to me why the official results from the sec state of minnesota's website says Franken is leading by 5,000 votes, when every news organization is parroting that Coleman is leading by 300?

/franken is not a douche; as far as I know he has never been inserted into a woman's vajiggle in order to clean it out


Probably not counting challenges. Coleman has challenged more than Franken. Coleman's count assumes all the challenges aren't counted. The media is generally going with Coleman's count apparently, damn liberal media!

 
RemyDuron 2008-12-05 02:40:36 AM  
Gyrfalcon: Dear Mr. Franken,
Take a lesson from a finer and more gracious loser, Senator John McCain, and just give up already, okay?

Thanks.


Why? I mean, why give up now when the recount is nearly finished and the challenges haven't been decided? I mean, if he were willing to give up, why not give up before the recount?

The recount is automatic. You must understand this. This is not Franken's doing. And it's not finished yet. Not to mention the challenges, which will be what decides it.

 
Hiro's Protagonist 2008-12-05 02:45:17 AM  
Is no one going to jail for "losing" those ballots?

 
Lionel Mandrake [TotalFark] 2008-12-05 02:50:52 AM  
Gyrfalcon: Dear Mr. Franken,
Take a lesson from a finer and more gracious loser, Senator John McCain, and just give up already, okay?

Thanks.


If by "finer and more gracious" you mean clearly got his ass kicked as opposed to so-close-a-recount-was-automatic, then yeah...wait, NO. You're an idiot.

 
holiday_inn_in_cambodia 2008-12-05 02:58:48 AM  
RminusQ:
The Minnesota SOS is reporting those votes which have been recounted, which represent 99% of the precincts. Counting only those votes that have been accepted, Franken leads by 4658. When these precincts were counted the first time, Franken led by 4648. Thus, Franken has gained 10 votes. If the remaining precincts result in no change, Coleman's 215-vote lead would become a 205-vote win.

The difference between the 200 and 300 is because of different upstate statuses. The other HUGE problem with this logic is that it treats challenged ballots as non-existant, when most likely they are frivolous and will by and large become legit votes. Coleman has challenged 114 more ballots, so Franken is very likely to gain a number of votes once the challenged ballots are counted (beginning next week IIRC).



that makes no sense. with 99% of the precincts counted, franken leads/led by 4600? so the remaining 1% somehow gave coleman 4900 more votes than franken? thats so statistically unlikely that it makes my brain asplode.

RemyDuron:

Probably not counting challenges. Coleman has challenged more than Franken. Coleman's count assumes all the challenges aren't counted. The media is generally going with Coleman's count apparently, damn liberal media!


even taking the contested totals into account, from their website, franken would win, as the margin is larger than the amount that either is contesting, which is roughly the same for each.


I just read a website that said coleman was leading by 300 votes and that they get their information from that exact website. NOWHERE on that website is it possible to interpret the numbers from the recount as a 300 vote lead for coleman.

 
The RIchest Man in Babylon 2008-12-05 02:59:06 AM  
Gyrfalcon: Dear Mr. Franken,
Take a lesson from a finer and more gracious loser, Senator John McCain, and just give up already, okay?

Thanks.


Yes, clearly several hundred votes difference is the same thing as 10 million votes.

And naturally we also forget that the recount was required by Minnesota state law.

Just to be clear, you're saying:

100 == 10,000,000
And fark states' rights.

Got it.

 
qualopec [TotalFark] 2008-12-05 03:03:48 AM  
OMG Socialism: Democracy is asinine now?

No, what's asinine is that it takes over a month to figure out who won a frickin' election, while both sides file some of the most ridiculous ballot challenges evar.

 
jimmyhaha [TotalFark] 2008-12-05 03:05:53 AM  
Because those are the numbers of recounted ballots. There are still many heavily Republican precincts yet to be recounted.

 
TwistedFark 2008-12-05 03:08:18 AM  
Britney Spear's Speculum: And on the other hand, Franken is so far left that it's not a good thing.

What. The. Fark. Are. You. Talking. About?

Do you even know what any of Al Franken's positions are? How many of them are "far left"?

Franken is actually fairly moderate, but mostly a populist. Hell if you take away the entire abortion debate then Mike Huckabee must be really far left too because he's another populist.

A lot of you guys on Fark are scary retards, and that's the truth.

 
EL_FABREZ 2008-12-05 03:11:00 AM  
Can we just plow Minnesota over? If they continue to elect people like Michele Bachmann and think Al Franken would be good representation, do we really need these people using our limited resources?

 
Sgt Otter [TotalFark] 2008-12-05 03:12:54 AM  
AboveTheStarsOfGod: I'm pulling for Franken, douche that he is, but let's give credit where it's due: That was a fine headline.

It is. But between the two, I'd pin this more on the incumbent who can't secure a decisive victory against this guy:

images.dawgsports.com

 
saintstryfe 2008-12-05 03:14:17 AM  
holiday_inn_in_cambodia: RminusQ:
The Minnesota SOS is reporting those votes which have been recounted, which represent 99% of the precincts. Counting only those votes that have been accepted, Franken leads by 4658. When these precincts were counted the first time, Franken led by 4648. Thus, Franken has gained 10 votes. If the remaining precincts result in no change, Coleman's 215-vote lead would become a 205-vote win.

The difference between the 200 and 300 is because of different upstate statuses. The other HUGE problem with this logic is that it treats challenged ballots as non-existant, when most likely they are frivolous and will by and large become legit votes. Coleman has challenged 114 more ballots, so Franken is very likely to gain a number of votes once the challenged ballots are counted (beginning next week IIRC).


that makes no sense. with 99% of the precincts counted, franken leads/led by 4600? so the remaining 1% somehow gave coleman 4900 more votes than franken? thats so statistically unlikely that it makes my brain asplode.

RemyDuron:

Probably not counting challenges. Coleman has challenged more than Franken. Coleman's count assumes all the challenges aren't counted. The media is generally going with Coleman's count apparently, damn liberal media!

even taking the contested totals into account, from their website, franken would win, as the margin is larger than the amount that either is contesting, which is roughly the same for each.


I just read a website that said coleman was leading by 300 votes and that they get their information from that exact website. NOWHERE on that website is it possible to interpret the numbers from the recount as a 300 vote lead for coleman.


the trick to people saying Coleman has a lead is that they challenge tons of votes, and then "Take them off the table", then proclaim you're winning.

Let's say we're having a run off, and I have 24 votes, you have 23. You challenge 4 votes, 3 of mine and 1 of yours, and you say you're winning 22 to 21, even though 4 votes are in limbo, regardless of if they're "Honest" challenges or not. You say because you're winning 22 to 21, I should quit. Hound and make it seem like I'm a petulant child for continuing to count. Proclaim you're the winner and that it should end "To start the healing".

That's Coleman's game at this point. It's what GW did in Florida in 2000. Difference is Franken learned from that, and he's not going to stand for it.

Give 'em hell, Franken.

 
The RIchest Man in Babylon 2008-12-05 03:14:24 AM  
TwistedFark: A lot of you guys on Fark are scary retards, and that's the truth.

Are you serious? You must be new here.

/yea, I know you're not. But seriously.

 
Dr. Mojo PhD [TotalFark] 2008-12-05 03:15:27 AM  
TwistedFark: A lot of you guys on Fark are scary retards, and that's the truth.

Just noticed that now, huh?

 
ulairix 2008-12-05 03:16:45 AM  
Here is the link to the Minnesota SoS election recount count so far. Seems to update nightly and is very close to completion.

http://electionresults.sos.state.mn.us/20081104/SenateRecount.asp

RECOUNT Number of Ballots for Coleman (as recounted) 1193307 41.33
RECOUNT Number of Ballots for Franken (as recounted) 1197965 41.49

Franken seems to have a lead of 4658, though this is by no means even close to the final tally.

 
holiday_inn_in_cambodia 2008-12-05 03:17:18 AM  
saintstryfe:
the trick to people saying Coleman has a lead is that they challenge tons of votes, and then "Take them off the table", then proclaim you're winning.

Let's say we're having a run off, and I have 24 votes, you have 23. You challenge 4 votes, 3 of mine and 1 of yours, and you say you're winning 22 to 21, even though 4 votes are in limbo, regardless of if they're "Honest" challenges or not. You say because you're winning 22 to 21, I should quit. Hound and make it seem like I'm a petulant child for continuing to count. Proclaim you're the winner and that it should end "To start the healing".

That's Coleman's game at this point. It's what GW did in Florida in 2000. Difference is Franken learned from that, and he's not going to stand for it.

Give 'em hell, Franken.


but it still makes no sense because the amount coleman is challenging is much less than the amount that franken is leading by according to these goobers (new window)

 
swahnhennessy 2008-12-05 03:39:32 AM  
Man, you guys are uptight. That headline was funny, regardless of your politics.

 
saintstryfe 2008-12-05 03:44:04 AM  
swahnhennessy: Man, you guys are uptight. That headline was funny, regardless of your politics.

I agree. I think Al would too. He can laugh at himself pretty easily.

 
saintstryfe 2008-12-05 03:45:45 AM  
holiday_inn_in_cambodia: but it still makes no sense because the amount coleman is challenging is much less than the amount that franken is leading by according to these goobers (new window)

the counties yet to be counted are Coleman's areas, so that'll shrink. that seemingly insignificant difference will be much more important then.

 
Peaceboy [TotalFark] 2008-12-05 03:56:35 AM  
I'm just here to drunkenly defend "Stuart Saves His Family", which I thought was one of the better SNL spinoff flicks. Awkward, for anyone from a dysfunctional family. Which is pretty much all of us.

"Okay, Jodie, I would never ordinarily say this, but... is there any way you can get to a pound cake?"

Fine performance from Vincent D'Onofrio, also.

 
DuncanMhor 2008-12-05 04:03:49 AM  
I really don't get the Franken hate. If you stop posting pictures of him acting and actually read his political ideas, he's a fairly moderate left-winger. More importantly, he's very well informed.

Or is that why you don't like him?

 
RemyDuron 2008-12-05 04:08:54 AM  
DuncanMhor: I really don't get the Franken hate. If you stop posting pictures of him acting and actually read his political ideas, he's a fairly moderate left-winger. More importantly, he's very well informed.

Or is that why you don't like him?


He calls bullshiat artists on their bullshiat with no regard to being polite and makes no bones about making them the butt of jokes. He's also an unapologetic liberal, farking with the whole atmosphere they've created that says being liberal is bad and you should feel bad about it.

 
DuncanMhor 2008-12-05 04:11:39 AM  
RemyDuron: He calls bullshiat artists on their bullshiat with no regard to being polite and makes no bones about making them the butt of jokes. He's also an unapologetic liberal, farking with the whole atmosphere they've created that says being liberal is bad and you should feel bad about it.

I knew there was a reason I liked him...

 
RemyDuron 2008-12-05 04:23:13 AM  
DuncanMhor: RemyDuron: He calls bullshiat artists on their bullshiat with no regard to being polite and makes no bones about making them the butt of jokes. He's also an unapologetic liberal, farking with the whole atmosphere they've created that says being liberal is bad and you should feel bad about it.

I knew there was a reason I liked him...


Unfortunately, he also commits lies of omission and has some bias. He's more fact based, but he is not objective. He very much believe in liberal principles and believes that they help people. He cares about this stuff.

His comedy is also really weird when he writes. His jokes are deadpan, which is a weird way to explain written jokes, but reading it they don't break the flow or really look out of place, so you take them for serious and then you look back and go, "What?!"

 
RemyDuron 2008-12-05 04:27:01 AM  
RemyDuron: DuncanMhor: RemyDuron: He calls bullshiat artists on their bullshiat with no regard to being polite and makes no bones about making them the butt of jokes. He's also an unapologetic liberal, farking with the whole atmosphere they've created that says being liberal is bad and you should feel bad about it.

I knew there was a reason I liked him...

Unfortunately, he also commits lies of omission and has some bias. He's more fact based, but he is not objective. He very much believe in liberal principles and believes that they help people. He cares about this stuff.

His comedy is also really weird when he writes. His jokes are deadpan, which is a weird way to explain written jokes, but reading it they don't break the flow or really look out of place, so you take them for serious and then you look back and go, "What?!"


Oh, and just to be clear, I like that about his comedy. It was just very weird the firs time I read one of his books (Oh, The Things I Know).

And the lie of omission was a pretty clever set up, actually, but still a lie. He was accusing Coulter of lying by saying misleading things or leaving stuff out and putting it in endnotes that no one reads. So he did the same thing. She had said that someones father was a member of the American Communist party, Franken said that wasn't true at all and she was crazy, she called him out saying that it was this persons grandfather who was a member of the Amerian communist party, and that he had left that out making her out to look crazy instead of slightly mistaken. He pointed her to his one end note where he had put the information.

 
coxinha 2008-12-05 04:33:26 AM  
Politics aside, I lol'd hard at that headline. +1 from me subby.

 
ComicBookGuy 2008-12-05 06:07:27 AM  
OMG Socialism: Democracy is asinine now?

When it comes to conservatives and faux libertarians, yes.

 
DuncanMhor 2008-12-05 07:06:22 AM  
RemyDuron: And the lie of omission was a pretty clever set up, actually, but still a lie. He was accusing Coulter of lying by saying misleading things or leaving stuff out and putting it in endnotes that no one reads. So he did the same thing. She had said that someones father was a member of the American Communist party, Franken said that wasn't true at all and she was crazy, she called him out saying that it was this persons grandfather who was a member of the Amerian communist party, and that he had left that out making her out to look crazy instead of slightly mistaken. He pointed her to his one end note where he had put the information.

I have the audiobook of Lies and I remember that bit. Is it wrong that I dislike Coulter so much that I find this amusing? Naughty?, yes, a little deceptive? yeah, but I don't really care :)

 
US1 2008-12-05 07:34:34 AM  
Gyrfalcon: Dear Mr. Franken,
Take a lesson from a finer and more gracious loser, Senator John McCain, and just give up already, okay?

Thanks.


if mccain had a razor thing margin, you think he would give up? umm obama kicked his butt, thats why he gave up.

 
Bring-out-your-dead 2008-12-05 07:45:13 AM  
If he doesn't win the seat in the senate, maybe he can host a radio show or something.

 
Erebus1954 2008-12-05 07:48:23 AM  
Stuart isn't attractive, isn't fun to be with, and isn't good enough.

 
FlashHarry [TotalFark] 2008-12-05 08:22:54 AM  
i33.tinypic.com

/oblig

 
LouDobbsAwaaaay 2008-12-05 08:49:08 AM  
Franken's books must be hilarious, because I've never seen him do anything on screen that is even remotely entertaining, but people still seem to say he's funny.

That said, how is Franken responsible for a state-mandated recount? Is it Franken's fault that the vote was so close or something? I don't get it.

 
Lumi 2008-12-05 09:05:54 AM  
qualopec: No, what's asinine is that it takes over a month to figure out who won a frickin' election, while both sides file some of the most ridiculous ballot challenges evar.

No, taking overing a month to figure out who won an election is farking beautiful.

I'm very happy to live in a society where, in some parts, every voice, every vote is considered precious and important. And where we care enough about those voices to spend a month laboriously hand-recounting votes.

What sucks about that? Should the king simply step in in close elections and declare a winner? Should we have a sudden death round and whichever candidate runs up the Capitol steps fastest wins the election?

Okay, that last one would be cool. But it's still so awesomely mindblowingly cool that we care about each. and every. single. vote.

 
GoldSpider 2008-12-05 09:12:39 AM  
You lost! Get over it!

/See? That's a great substitute for arguing an issue on its merits.

 
Tyee 2008-12-05 09:12:48 AM  
If they had a re-vote today Frankin would have his ass handed to him. MN went strongly for Obama yet many people split their ballot and voted Coleman. We know this because the election is so close. Many who voted Frankin did so only because he had a (d) behind his name and that is what Obama had, especially in the urban areas.

 
bubbaprog [recently expired TotalFark] 2008-12-05 09:29:03 AM  
Lumi: No, taking overing a month to figure out who won an election is farking beautiful.

Thank you.

If this election had been conducted by Diebold we'd never know who actually won. God bless paper ballots marked with a pen (even if, as we've seen, marking circles is too difficult for many Minnesotans to accomplish).

 
bubbaprog [recently expired TotalFark] 2008-12-05 09:30:05 AM  
LouDobbsAwaaaay: Franken's books must be hilarious, because I've never seen him do anything on screen that is even remotely entertaining, but people still seem to say he's funny.

They are funny. And his best TV work is in places you wouldn't recognize him -- Harvard Lampoon one-offs, etc.

 
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