That's a really bad simile, on a whole lot of levels. For one thing, the cigar itself doesn't creep. It's inserted, or pushed. If we're going to compare Bill Clinton to a cigar, then the verb being used to describe the action of the cigar entering the intern (which, extending the comparison here, is the White House) must capture the idea that the cigar is being manipulated by somebody else, not moving on its own accord. Bad, bad.

Pocket Ninja: Bad, bad.


"Bad, naughty metaphor. You must be punished."

King Something: Pocket Ninja: Bad, bad.


"Bad, naughty metaphor. You must be punished."

LULHWUT?

Pocket Ninja: That's a really bad simile, on a whole lot of levels. For one thing, the cigar itself doesn't creep. It's inserted, or pushed. If we're going to compare Bill Clinton to a cigar, then the verb being used to describe the action of the cigar entering the intern (which, extending the comparison here, is the White House) must capture the idea that the cigar is being manipulated by somebody else, not moving on its own accord. Bad, bad.

I think you've dedicated a weeee too much thought to the topic.

Diogenes: I think you've dedicated a weeee too much thought to the topic.

Oh, I haven't even started. Like I said, it's problematic on multiple levels. Moving past the obvious issues that stem from the verb choice, we run into some very significant issues of parallelism. In the real-life situation, we have Bill Clinton manipulating a static object upon a willing participant. Now, look at the simile. We've replaced the static object with Bill Clinton himself, which right off the bat destroys the entire set-up. If Bill Clinton is to become the cigar in this metaphor, then he's got to be in a situation where he is being acted upon by some sort of manipulator, and at the same time acting upon some sort of willing recipient. The comparison being used here avoids that conundrum by simply imparting the ability to control its own actions (ie, "creep") upon the "cigar" in question. But, as should be plainly obvious, this doesn't work as it changes the underlying meaning of the event itself, which destroys any possibility of a truly meaningful comparison. I suppose you could try to expand the scenario and create some sort of situation where Bill Clinton is becoming the "cigar" being inserted into the "White House" (or, in other words, public life, i.e., America) by someone such as Hilary or Obama, but the simile, as written, does not appear to be attempting this. And, in truth, it's a much more convoluted situation that the real-life scenario permits. And it also brings us to yet another issue, which is what, exactly, the White House is supposed to represent. Clearly, not an intern...and yet there's no real obvious meaning to be drawn from it based upon the real events. It's frustrating.

I could go on, but I'll stop now.

...and there was much raising of thumbs and biting of lips.

King Something: Pocket Ninja: Bad, bad.


"Bad, naughty metaphor. You must be punished."

Surely you could've found someone a bit older and more emotive?

Pocket Ninja: Diogenes: I think you've dedicated a weeee too much thought to the topic.

Oh, I haven't even started. Like I said, it's problematic on multiple levels. Moving past the obvious issues that stem from the verb choice, we run into some very significant issues of parallelism. In the real-life situation, we have Bill Clinton manipulating a static object upon a willing participant. Now, look at the simile. We've replaced the static object with Bill Clinton himself, which right off the bat destroys the entire set-up. If Bill Clinton is to become the cigar in this metaphor, then he's got to be in a situation where he is being acted upon by some sort of manipulator, and at the same time acting upon some sort of willing recipient. The comparison being used here avoids that conundrum by simply imparting the ability to control its own actions (ie, "creep") upon the "cigar" in question. But, as should be plainly obvious, this doesn't work as it changes the underlying meaning of the event itself, which destroys any possibility of a truly meaningful comparison. I suppose you could try to expand the scenario and create some sort of situation where Bill Clinton is becoming the "cigar" being inserted into the "White House" (or, in other words, public life, i.e., America) by someone such as Hilary or Obama, but the simile, as written, does not appear to be attempting this. And, in truth, it's a much more convoluted situation that the real-life scenario permits. And it also brings us to yet another issue, which is what, exactly, the White House is supposed to represent. Clearly, not an intern...and yet there's no real obvious meaning to be drawn from it based upon the real events. It's frustrating.

I could go on, but I'll stop now.

No, please go on.

Remember when Bill Clinton fingered some fat biatch with a cigar? Hilarious!

crass simile is crass!

Pocket Ninja: Diogenes: I think you've dedicated a weeee too much thought to the topic.

Oh, I haven't even started. Like I said, it's problematic on multiple levels. Moving past the obvious issues that stem from the verb choice, we run into some very significant issues of parallelism. In the real-life situation, we have Bill Clinton manipulating a static object upon a willing participant. Now, look at the simile. We've replaced the static object with Bill Clinton himself, which right off the bat destroys the entire set-up. If Bill Clinton is to become the cigar in this metaphor, then he's got to be in a situation where he is being acted upon by some sort of manipulator, and at the same time acting upon some sort of willing recipient. The comparison being used here avoids that conundrum by simply imparting the ability to control its own actions (ie, "creep") upon the "cigar" in question. But, as should be plainly obvious, this doesn't work as it changes the underlying meaning of the event itself, which destroys any possibility of a truly meaningful comparison. I suppose you could try to expand the scenario and create some sort of situation where Bill Clinton is becoming the "cigar" being inserted into the "White House" (or, in other words, public life, i.e., America) by someone such as Hilary or Obama, but the simile, as written, does not appear to be attempting this. And, in truth, it's a much more convoluted situation that the real-life scenario permits. And it also brings us to yet another issue, which is what, exactly, the White House is supposed to represent. Clearly, not an intern...and yet there's no real obvious meaning to be drawn from it based upon the real events. It's frustrating.

I could go on, but I'll stop now.

Jesus was an extraterrestrial.

Pocket Ninja: That's a really bad simile, on a whole lot of levels. For one thing, the cigar itself doesn't creep. It's inserted, or pushed. If we're going to compare Bill Clinton to a cigar, then the verb being used to describe the action of the cigar entering the intern (which, extending the comparison here, is the White House) must capture the idea that the cigar is being manipulated by somebody else, not moving on its own accord. Bad, bad.

But what if the cigar crept into Lewinsky's vagina as the result of the inhaling part of a queef?

Ah-ha!

Hillary may get to be Secretary of State, but I hope that Obama just sends him packing.

//A man can dream, can't he.

"It tastes good."

-43rd President of the United States

+1 for funny headline
-1 for squick

/If I weren't a liter, that would add up to zero.
//Instead, it adds up to the empty set.

This is the worst thing about Hillary getting the Secretary of State job. We're going to have to put up with 4 or more years of unfunny Bill Clinton jokes.

Pocket Ninja: That's a really bad simile, on a whole lot of levels. For one thing, the cigar itself doesn't creep. It's inserted, or pushed. If we're going to compare Bill Clinton to a cigar, then the verb being used to describe the action of the cigar entering the intern (which, extending the comparison here, is the White House) must capture the idea that the cigar is being manipulated by somebody else, not moving on its own accord. Bad, bad.

Sometimes, not always, but sometimes, you go full retard.

Ick.

I wish that Obama would create a cabinet-level position for Bill Clinton titled "Secretary of Being the Sand In Republican Vaginas".

And now, C-SPAN presents an address by Secretary of Being the Sand in Republican Vaginas, Bill Clinton:

Dear Republicans,

Suck it. Suck. It.

This concludes today's address.

rynthetyn: This is the worst thing about Hillary getting the Secretary of State job. We're going to have to put up with 4 or more years of unfunny Bill Clinton jokes.

So, write some funny ones. Don't Americans have any initiative any more?

Willy:

Did he actually fall for it and make Hil Secretary of State!

Whoa, doesn't she have to travel like 355 days a year!

And I've got $100 mil and two houses to entertain chicks.

Better, have my heart checked again.

No more ugly dumb ones like Paula, Monica and my other bimbos.


I want cerebral and hot!!!!!
Hoooo Haaaa!

Well, the cigar is in the hand of Slick Willie, so, I took the headline to read something like this:

"Slick Willie is creeping back into the white house in a manner similar to the way in which he would push that cigar into Ms. Monica Lewinski"

Yes, "creeping" isn't quite right, though. I suggest subby should have said "inserted himself"

So, the full FTFY should read thus:

"Slick Willie is inserting himself back into the white house in a manner similar to the way in which he would push that cigar into Ms. Monica Lewinski"

What is hard to capture correctly, I think, is the idea of "motion." I mean, it's not like Willie just put that cigar in there. I'm sure he moved it in and out, around, and the like.

PROBLEM: If the cigar is moving in and out of Lewinski's vagina, and if Clinton is like that cigar, and the white house is like that vagina, shouldn't the Slick Willie be getting in and out of the White House, first slow, then fast, then slow down again, etc?

THIS lack of motion is where the analogy truly breaks down.

Bhasayate: Well, the cigar is in the hand of Slick Willie, so, I took the headline to read something like this:

"Slick Willie is creeping back into the white house in a manner similar to the way in which he would push that cigar into Ms. Monica Lewinski"

Yes, "creeping" isn't quite right, though. I suggest subby should have said "inserted himself"

So, the full FTFY should read thus:

"Slick Willie is inserting himself back into the white house in a manner similar to the way in which he would push that cigar into Ms. Monica Lewinski"

What is hard to capture correctly, I think, is the idea of "motion." I mean, it's not like Willie just put that cigar in there. I'm sure he moved it in and out, around, and the like.

PROBLEM: If the cigar is moving in and out of Lewinski's vagina, and if Clinton is like that cigar, and the white house is like that vagina, shouldn't the Slick Willie be getting in and out of the White House, first slow, then fast, then slow down again, etc?

THIS lack of motion is where the analogy truly breaks down.

I love Fark.

neddddavis: Willy:

Did he actually fall for it and make Hil Secretary of State!

Whoa, doesn't she have to travel like 355 days a year!

And I've got $100 mil and two houses to entertain chicks.

Better, have my heart checked again.

No more ugly dumb ones like Paula, Monica and my other bimbos.


I want cerebral and hot!!!!!
Hoooo Haaaa!

Do you think he looks younger the past few days?
Like maybe a weight has been lifted from his shoulders or losing weight or something,,

OK, subby that header is totally uncalled for.
Totally.
You are so going to hell.
So. Going.

Too bad I am too. Window seat!

King Something: Pocket Ninja: Bad, bad.


"Bad, naughty metaphor. You must be punished."

Should have really picked Asuka for that. I mean, Rei as a dominatrix? That's completely against character!

demanton: I wish that Obama would create a cabinet-level position for Bill Clinton titled "Secretary of Being the Sand In Republican Vaginas".

And now, C-SPAN presents an address by Secretary of Being the Sand in Republican Vaginas, Bill Clinton:

Dear Republicans,

Suck it. Suck. It.

This concludes today's address.

Jesus Hussein Christ, are you trying to get me fired?

/DYING with laughter
//Imagining him pouting and doing that hound dog look while he says suck it
///even better if he actually points to the crotch and thrusts it outward

brilliant Fark. comparing a farkup who got us on the road to ruin to a President who enjoyed a blow job or two in the Whitehouse by an intern. i'm not condoning what Clinton did but what you're boy george did to this country is Treasonous. brilliant, Fark. just brilliant.

Most Americans are dumber than dirt. like Sheep, they believe that a blow job is serious and could undermine our way of life. could destroy america. you Jesus thumpers never cease to entertain. what george did to this country could never be measured. its too comprehensive the damage he's done. and you clowns are wrapped up in a blow job?? Pathetic.

Linux_Yes: Most Americans are dumber than dirt. like Sheep, they believe that a blow job is serious and could undermine our way of life. could destroy america. you Jesus thumpers never cease to entertain. what george did to this country could never be measured. its too comprehensive the damage he's done. and you clowns are wrapped up in a blow job?? Pathetic.

1. Work on your spelling and punctuation.

2. Bubba was not tried for a BJ, he was tried (by Congress) for lying about a BJ under oath in relation to sexual harassment suits.

Linux_Yes: Most Americans are dumber than dirt. like Sheep, they believe that a blow job is serious and could undermine our way of life. could destroy america. you Jesus thumpers never cease to entertain. what george did to this country could never be measured. its too comprehensive the damage he's done. and you clowns are wrapped up in a blow job?? Pathetic.


I read somewhere that they did a study about sex practices, and find out what percentage had engaged in oral sex.

They found that the less education people had, the less likely they had oral sex. For people with less than high school education it was some really low number, I can't remember -- but I just laughed my farking head off when I read it

Linux_Yes: Most Americans are dumber than dirt. like Sheep, they believe that a blow job is serious and could undermine our way of life. could destroy america. you Jesus thumpers never cease to entertain. what george did to this country could never be measured. its too comprehensive the damage he's done. and you clowns are wrapped up in a blow job?? Pathetic.

1. Work on your spelling and punctuation.

2. Bubba was not tried for a BJ, he was tried (by Congress) for lying about a BJ under oath in relation to sexual harassment suits.

When trying to sound like you are above the fray, at least use common English, Linux. The way you did it makes it appear that you may be a Democrat homo actor trying out for a role as a citizen of a fairly cool country.

I only just got the sexual innuendo in the name 'Slick Willie'.

Jesus Christ, that one took a while.