Gravity, huh? I almost fell for that one.

Sounds like a reach at this point.

Some people make fun of me because I'm a wiccan, and I don't believe in gravity.

/obscure?
//oh yeah. inside joke.
///there was a fat wiccan biatch in my class who said that. In the middle of English class.
////Pilot was wiccan.

tortilla burger: Gravity, huh? I almost fell for that one.

Really. I mean, gravity is just a theory after all, and a poorly defended one at that.

Of course, Airbus can't admit their planes are for shiat, so they're grasping at straws with this.

/high on cough medicine. no idea what the hell I just said.

It wasn't Quantis?

/Should've taken Quantis

Jaws_Victim: Some people make fun of me because I'm a wiccan, and I don't believe in gravity.

/obscure?
//oh yeah. inside joke.
///there was a fat wiccan biatch in my class who said that. In the middle of English class.
////Pilot was wiccan.

Congratulations. I think you just found the very first thing to truly be obscure on Fark.

/not likely
//you probably had 10 future farkers in that class with you

What the hell is Quantis?

cazman: What the hell is Quantis?



Not sure why you'd want to fly one of those.

FTFA: French aviation officials were investigating whether the paintwork affected external instruments providing data to the A320 aircraft's systems.



/needs more information
//was it a metalic paint job that messed with the instruments or something?

So we can take a giant metal tube weighing hundreds of tons, load it up with decayed fossils, light them on fire and send the entire contraption hurling thousands of feet through the air and get it to land safely 99.99x% of the time but God forbid the thing has the wrong sort of paint job.

"i'll paint any jet for $29.95."

OKaaaayyyyyy then.

Seeing as I'm watching the NFL, I'm going to go ahead and blame my team being awful on, let's say, Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch.

I'm blaming the Orcs.

Paint job?
Can anyone explain how a paint job can bring down a plane?
Was the paint still wet, causing it to be more sticky in the air?
I'm baffled.

You think they'd cover the f'ing pitot tubes before they paint those things. Considering they need them to stay in the air and such.

There are instruments on the outside of the airplane, designed with small openings to measure air speed / pressure. If these openings are painted over, or otherwise covered, they no longer work and are thus useless (or provide misleading readings).

Seems plausible, though their maintenence / paint crew truly sucks if they made a rookie mistake like that.

EvilElecBlanket: FTFA: French aviation officials were investigating whether the paintwork affected external instruments providing data to the A320 aircraft's systems.



/needs more information
//was it a metalic paint job that messed with the instruments or something?

yoyopro: Paint job?
Can anyone explain how a paint job can bring down a plane?
Was the paint still wet, causing it to be more sticky in the air?
I'm baffled.

There are several extrenal instruments that depend on an accurate airflow into them to provide accurate data to the pilots, such as Airspeed indication for one. Fark those up even a little bit and give pilots bad data...all the sudden you have pilots thinking they're flying at one speed, but they're either too slow or too fast, and then the plane either falls out of the sky or rips itself apart.

That'll learn 'em to use Quantas next time, the national airline of Austria, next time. Hitler insisted on excellent paint, and they've proven their abilities in France.

zamboni: That'll learn 'em to use Quantas next time, the national airline of Austria, next time. Hitler insisted on excellent paint, and they've proven their abilities in France.

Why is there a motherfarking Godwin in this motherfarking thread?

Theological Farker: zamboni: That'll learn 'em to use Quantas next time, the national airline of Austria, next time. Hitler insisted on excellent paint, and they've proven their abilities in France.

Why is there a motherfarking Godwin in this motherfarking thread?

You know who else liked to Godwin people? Of course... it took longer then.

If they painted over the static ports then the readings would be off on altitude etc on a small plane. We're not talking about a small plane though.. The avionics on a new jet is linked with sats. The burning image the surfers saw is kind of suspect though.

That's french investigation for you though..

Officer Pepe: You saw the engine on fire?
Surfer: Yes!
Officer Pepe: Hmmm sounds like it could have been faulty paint..


Oh.. a picture of me and my airplane.. cause I can.

xynix: Oh.. a picture of me and my airplane.. cause I can.

Farking elitist.

Look up pitot tubes. This has happened before. If you paint over the instrument tubes, the instrument doesn't work. If the instrument doesn't work, flying the plane becomes much less possible.

answers to how paint can do this: look up pito static tubes, also look at how paint affects an air frame, how many coats an airframe can take before it must be retired.

snarky fark response:
Why don't they just paint it with the same paint they use on the "Black Box"?

/then it would never break.

All digital .. Getting speed/alt/location via GPS. The backup gauges are probably still analog and using tubes though.

Check out the cockpit of the 00's

xynix: All digital .. Getting speed/alt/location via GPS. The backup gauges are probably still analog and using tubes though.

Check out the cockpit of the 00's

Digital systems without analog backups.

Face. Palm.

It's QANTAS folks. No U's, no I's

A lot of accidents are traced to this problem. pitot tubes and static air vents aren't painted, they get masked off then the tape isn't removed before flight. This results in instruments that don't work, or give erroneous information.

Static air vents that get masked off before a wash job, then not removing the tape is also a continuing problem

Where can I get me a Magic -ball that has Gravity as a reason for why shiat happens?

/WANT

Maybe it was paint in one of the sensor tubes-- kind of like how a tiny bit of water in the wrong spot brought down a $2 billion B2 bomber

Even the digital systems have recievers on the airframe that cannot be painted. Look on the underside or on top of a jet, you'll see a few oddly shaped flat surfaces that are a different color than the rest of the plane. Those are things like your GPS reciever, VOR/TACAN, perhaps ILS. I can't imagine the manufacturer would mark such things with "TACAN ANTENNA, DO NOT PAINT" without good reason.

I don't know how those fancy pilots do crap.. but I check my static port and backup static port before I fly.. every time. It's part of precheck.

those ribbons aren't there for decoration. there are holes elsewhere that measure static.


/not that i think the paint brought it down, just showing the concept.

//warm link

EvilElecBlanket: //was it a metallic paint job that messed with the instruments or something?

I'm guessing that's what they're guessing. I'm not an expert, but I understood the nose-cone containing the radar etc was non-metallic; so it's possible that a metallic paint-job could interfere with the instruments.

I can't believe that a company doing an aircraft paint-job picks up a drum of metallic paint from a car dealership... the paint will be tested and certified along with all other components of an aircraft. If there WAS a dodgy paint-job, then someone's going to jail, surely?

cazman: It's QANTAS folks. No U's, no I's

A lot of accidents are traced to this problem. pitot tubes and static air vents aren't painted, they get masked off then the tape isn't removed before flight. This results in instruments that don't work, or give erroneous information.

Static air vents that get masked off before a wash job, then not removing the tape is also a continuing problem

I just read a little bit...looks like the flight was airborne 90 minutes or so. One would think that those instruments malfunctioning would have come up much earlier in the flight.

You know who else blamed their problems on a bad paint job?

opiumpoopy: If there WAS a dodgy paint-job, then someone's going to jail, surely

If it was, maybe, but more likely a lousy pre-flight for missing the taped over static ports. It almost always comes back on the pilot.

Remember, if a wing falls of an airplane and it crashes, it's because the pilot failed to maintain altitude. Then in small print, teh FAA will say "contributing factor was failure of the airfoil."

It was both. The paint came from China. There was too much lead in the formulation again. Gravity (and the extra 6000 tons of weight) obviously dragged the plane down.

/ Shakes fist.

Theological Farker: I just read a little bit...looks like the flight was airborne 90 minutes or so. One would think that those instruments malfunctioning would have come up much earlier in the flight.

I concur. Be interesting to hear whats on the voice recorder

cazman: I concur. Be interesting to hear whats on the voice recorder

*shakes magic 8 ball*

"Oh, shiat."

Ever notice, the pilots on CVR's never bother to give us a dissertation of went wrong? Farking pansies, too busy panicking and all.

/agree, it will be interesting.
//just did a little reading, apparently the Airbus FBW systems have had a 20 year history of complaints from pilots about erroneous altitude readings.
///also interesting to note, while there is no mechanical back up, there is dual architecture. All flight systems have two fully function computers...the computers are different brands with different hardward programmed by different teams to try to prevent a spontaneous failure of both systems at the same point.
////just flew a newer A320 to MA...most comfortable flight I've ever had.

Phil Moskowitz

You think they'd cover the f'ing pitot tubes before they paint those things. Considering they need them to stay in the air and such.

Or remember to peel the masking tape off afterwards....

cazman: It's QANTAS folks. No U's, no I's



LOL... that's one!

Just screwing with the pitot tubes WILL cause erroneous NO readings, but a brand new jet with TEST pilots should be able to recognize such a situation and fly at the VERY least using the window.

The fact it was daylight really makes me want to rule out paint unless they used something right off the shelf and it started flaking of in large strips and one of the engines ingested to much, since if the guy was right one engine did flame out

Farking Earl Scheib!

xynix: All digital .. Getting speed/alt/location via GPS. The backup gauges are probably still analog and using tubes though.


GPS cannot give you airspeed, only ground speed. Pilots need airspeed. Groundspeed is of little use in flying the plane, but useful for navigation.

Maybe the radome was painted with the wrong kind of paint, causing it to heat up from the microwave radiation and disintegrate in flight? I've heard of that kind of thing happening before. Maybe it could have ripped apart and threw a piece of fiberglass or whatever they make the radome out of into the engine.

EvilElecBlanket: FTFA: French aviation officials were investigating whether the paintwork affected external instruments providing data to the A320 aircraft's systems.



/needs more information
//was it a metalic paint job that messed with the instruments or something?

When I moved into my old apartment, I had to replace the cable outlets because some jackass had painted over them. Maybe some idiot painted over a sensor of some kind.

ssrat: TEST pilots should be able to recognize such a situation and fly at the VERY least using the window

Nope. In training, you're taught not to trust the seat of your pants. Never. TRUST YOUR INSTRUMENTS! Seat of your pants flying has put many, many more pilots in the ground than faulty instruments ever will.

cazman: Remember, if a wing falls of an airplane and it crashes, it's because the pilot failed to maintain altitude. Then in small print, teh FAA will say "contributing factor was failure of the airfoil."

Ah yes. We British do that too (^). "The engine management software was faulty; cut off the power; and you crashed and died. But it was your fault"

ssrat: Just screwing with the pitot tubes WILL cause erroneous NO readings, but a brand new jet with TEST pilots should be able to recognize such a situation and fly at the VERY least using the window.

The fact it was daylight really makes me want to rule out paint unless they used something right off the shelf and it started flaking of in large strips and one of the engines ingested to much, since if the guy was right one engine did flame out

Ever see a bird sitting stationary in the air because the wind was sufficient to generate lift?

Now that, except with a tailwind. The plane is now travelling twice as fast relative to the ground at just above stall speed, and the pilot is dead if he lets his speed drop to what he "feels" is right.

Happened at least twice before.

It wasn't that paint got into the static/pitot ports, but that they covered all the ports with tape and forgot to remove it, and the pilot failed to spot it on the external preflight.

This caused erroneous airspeed readings that really ruin your day.