The guy was right. He wasn't hit by a train. He was hit by "The Train"... which is what they call my fist in pr0n.

"The Black Knight always triumphs!"

Conductor: "Dammit! I ordered Bourbon!"

"Oh my God, you are right! I am sorry, let me prop you back up on the tracks, I mean bed you ware laying in." = More $ for the rest of us.

Just a flesh wound. Move along now. Nothing to see here....

"I woke up alongside a cliff face looking downward"
"No you didn't"

/alternative quotations rule

Best Name Ever.

WHISKY THREAD!

Yes you did.

where's the goddamn hero tag??

/addendum...do we have a Hancock tag?

I thought I heard someone call me.....????

"I told you I was hardcore."

/someone had to

lostcat: He should keep his mind of his wife's Boobies when approaching the train tracks.

haaaa! Self-pwnage FTW!

lostcat/MadAzza...time loop!

Get this man a lotto ticket, stat!

TAA DAAA!

/one shot please

Gee, that's a familiar looking logo there.

Allow me to be the first grammar Nazi to state that it's Jack Daniel, and there's an apostrophe in the title.

Seriously, is there anything worse than a JD hangover? That has to be THE nastiest taste ever.

Hat's off to the Daniels, who correctly identified their son's future as being a drunk and name him Jack.

If you don't think he was a drunk, then you don't know Jack!

/who else hangs around railways?
//false teeth at age 61
///limp enough to withstand impact
////numb enough not to feel it
/slash it like you mean it

It doesn't say in the article, can we assume he was hammered?

Getting hit by Acela (new window) and living is pretty impressive.

They've actually had to slow it down in some parts because idiots keep going on the tracks and getting pulverized.

Acela runs down the Northeast Corridor, which is the fastest stretch of rail in North America. If you watch the video, that is the Acela passing through the station where this guy got hit (not even at full speed). Notice the pedestrian overpass the train goes under...

/Darwin frustrated, vows to finish the job

Random fact: Jack Daniels (the distiller) died of blood poisoning from his toe, six years after kicking his safe because he couldn't remember the combination.

BELIEVE IT OR NOT

msheda: Hat's off to the Daniels, who correctly identified their son's future as being a drunk and name him Jack.

If you don't think he was a drunk, then you don't know Jack!

/who else hangs around railways?
//false teeth at age 61
///limp enough to withstand impact
////numb enough not to feel it
/slash it like you mean it

That's just what shock does to people. Probably what happened with all those medieval warriors who continued kicking ass after they should have been dead.

He should keep his mind of his wife's Boobies when approaching the train tracks.

Just a grease spot on the L&N.