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(Some medieval redneck) Fail If your brother barges into the bedroom you share with your live-in boyfriend and defends your honor with a crossbow -- twice -- you just might be a redneck   (recordherald.com) divider line 60
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Abzzstain [TotalFark] 2008-11-30 12:29:36 AM  
So it was a family quarrel.

 
ostcoiloveyouwelcometoc 2008-11-30 01:25:46 AM  
FTA: Fortunately, the victim is going to be OK


so all the rednecks live to redneck another day.

/i happy endings

 
Jim_Callahan 2008-11-30 05:10:08 AM  
Abzzstain: So it was a family quarrel.

Thanks a lot, I think that physically damaged my brain. If only it were damaged enough that I didn't get it.

 
DeRosso 2008-11-30 05:11:57 AM  
How can the writer not know the difference between a cross-bow and a bow?

Besides, I think something needs to be applied somewhere:

www.recordherald.com

 
swahnhennessy 2008-11-30 05:13:55 AM  
Was the victim enormously fat? I mean, a guy fires a crossbow at you, misses, arrow goes into the pillow. He has time to retrieve the arrow, reload and fire at you again, striking you in the side of the head. He's again able to pick up the arrow before running away. I mean, if you can't either defend yourself or take the damn arrow away by that point, you're really lazy.

 
other guy 2008-11-30 05:14:41 AM  
DeRosso: How can the writer not know the difference between a cross-bow and a bow?


Another point, crossbows fire bolts not arrows.

 
JonnyBGoode 2008-11-30 05:15:25 AM  
Abzzstain: So it was a family quarrel.

Won in one.

 
rockforever 2008-11-30 05:16:39 AM  
"SO I SAID,THIS HERE'S MY SISTER! ANYONE GONNA BE PUTTIN THERE PENIS INSIDE HER ITS GONNA BE ME!"

 
hyperspacemonkey 2008-11-30 05:17:23 AM  
The girl wanted her boyfriend dead. The brother is a nincompoop. He deserves to be a henchman on the old Batman show.

 
Rob Anybody 2008-11-30 05:20:51 AM  
Abzzstain: So it was a family quarrel.

You glorious bastard.

 
msheda 2008-11-30 05:24:48 AM  
Wilson, 32, of Columbus, reportedly retrieved the arrow from the pillow, loaded the bow again and fired at Routte, this time striking him with the arrow in the right side of the head. The arrow bounced to the floor, Wilson picked it up and ran from the home, police said.

Wilson's sister, Rebecca J. Wilson, was with her brother at the time and witnessed the incident. "It's my understanding that the victim was living with the offender's sister," said Lt. Jeff Ruth of the Washington C.H. Police Department. "Apparently, the offender and his sister had been at the bar before they came to the house


Alcohol may have been involved... DUH!

Darn Nerf cross bow's...

And this near to Christmas, he could have shot his eye out!

/if she aint good enough for her own family, she aint good enough for ours.

 
Old enough to know better 2008-11-30 05:27:12 AM  
To be fair, maybe he's in the SCA.

"Hold varlet!"

/Why no, I didn't RTFA. Why?

 
boobsrgood [TotalFark] 2008-11-30 05:30:24 AM  
Abzzstain: So it was a family quarrel.

Even if the whole block got involved, yes.

 
get_to_the_chopper 2008-11-30 05:30:46 AM  
should have hired this kid to do better
www.giftbasketsfrommichigan.com

\might shoot your eye out

 
WeeKeef [TotalFark] 2008-11-30 05:32:54 AM  
Abzzstain: So it was a family quarrel.

Thread over. Please report to the front desk to collect your free internet (1).

 
Ed Grubermann [TotalFark] 2008-11-30 05:35:14 AM  
"might be a redneck..." Unless all three people in the story were men.

 
AnkhX10.0 [TotalFark] 2008-11-30 05:36:28 AM  
EliteAnalyst: Actually given the violent crime data it is more likely that a violent felon is a negro than a redneck. Negroes are far more violent than white people and if you reject this data, you reject science and mathematics.

Rednecks, a racial slur against low income American white people which can fairly be described as hate speech, actually have noticeably lower crime rate than low income white people in other developed societies. Take West Virginia for example: lowest per capita number of cops, and nearly the lowest per capita blacks.

While the Marxist headline writers here desperately want to hide negro crime data and wrongly defame white people, I think it is important that we get the facts straight. I see a pattern developing where white people are getting blamed for black deeds (Prop 8, mortgage meltdown) and as long as The Elite One is around that is simply not on.

You will criticize the negro community and you will like it, understood?



9/10

I have to commend you for the use of the word "Negro" and "Marxist", but we all know Obama is "the One", not the "Elite One". Otherwise, you would of gotten 10/10.

 
cantsleep 2008-11-30 05:42:57 AM  
Cool, two Ohio links within 8 places of one another.

Where's that OHIO tag?

 
hardinparamedic [TotalFark] 2008-11-30 05:44:20 AM  
EliteAnalyst: Actually given the violent crime data it is more likely that a violent felon is a negro than a redneck. Negroes are far more violent than white people and if you reject this data, you reject science and mathematics.

Rednecks, a racial slur against low income American white people which can fairly be described as hate speech, actually have noticeably lower crime rate than low income white people in other developed societies. Take West Virginia for example: lowest per capita number of cops, and nearly the lowest per capita blacks.

While the Marxist headline writers here desperately want to hide negro crime data and wrongly defame white people, I think it is important that we get the facts straight. I see a pattern developing where white people are getting blamed for black deeds (Prop 8, mortgage meltdown) and as long as The Elite One is around that is simply not on.

You will criticize the negro community and you will like it, understood?


Obvious Troll is Obvious.
/African Americans make up a disproportionate amount of poverty and despair in American Society, thus influencing statistical rates of race and crime. However, this is one of many reasons why statistics are skewed.
/Corrolation does not equal Causation.

 
vudukungfu 2008-11-30 05:48:07 AM  
Abzzstain: So it was a family quarrel.

More like a family of squirrils.

 
GizmoMkI 2008-11-30 05:53:06 AM  
If the guy shoots an arrow, reloads, then aims again hitting the victim in the head, how is this classified as felonious assault instead of attempted murder?

 
jmgilchr 2008-11-30 05:54:56 AM  
GizmoMkI: If the guy shoots an arrow, reloads, then aims again hitting the victim in the head, how is this classified as felonious assault instead of attempted murder?

sibling rivalry

 
hetheeme 2008-11-30 05:56:24 AM  
I don't know why, but when I read that headline I couldn't help but think the central character was a guy, whose gay live in boyfriend was being fired upon by his brother.


Seriously, no idea why I went there first.

 
Branch Bacardi 2008-11-30 06:09:23 AM  
I've never fired a crossbow that the bolt would hit someone in the head at close range then bounce to the floor. Maybe it was nerf.

 
starsrift 2008-11-30 06:14:15 AM  
Does picking the arrow up and reloading the bow means that this is attempted 1st degree murder?

 
NotaFinn 2008-11-30 06:21:15 AM  
hetheeme: I don't know why, but when I read that headline I couldn't help but think the central character was a guy, whose gay live in boyfriend was being fired upon by his brother.


Seriously, no idea why I went there first.


I made the same mistake. My first reaction was to think the brother was trying to wipe out the boyfriend and "turn" his brother to the straight and narrow, which kinda makes sense in a redneck context.

But when I RTFA and the word "girlfriend" appeared I realised my mistake. Go figure!

 
Seasons I'v Withered 2008-11-30 07:00:01 AM  
Question: What kind of bow is this?


img389.imageshack.us
scroll down

img368.imageshack.us

Answer: Who gives a shiat

 
msheda 2008-11-30 07:10:43 AM  
Seasons I'v Withered: Question: What kind of bow is this?



scroll down



Answer: Who gives a shiat


I'm not sure she should get something strung so tight near those things! (and the bow probably isn't safe either)

 
michaeld5 2008-11-30 07:30:15 AM  
Seasons I'v Withered: Question: What kind of bow is this?



scroll down



Answer: Who gives a shiat


Those must have cost a fortune!!!

The bow looks expensive too.

 
wilder_card 2008-11-30 07:51:25 AM  
FTA: retrieved the arrow from the pillow, loaded the bow again and fired at Routte, this time striking him with the arrow in the right side of the head. The arrow bounced to the floor

Worst. bowman. ever.

 
Richard Saunders 2008-11-30 08:12:36 AM  
EliteAnalyst -Actually given the violent crime data it is more likely that a violent felon is a negro than a redneck. Negroes are far more violent than white people and if you reject this data, you reject science and mathematics.

Rednecks, a racial slur against low income American white people which can fairly be described as hate speech, actually have noticeably lower crime rate than low income white people in other developed societies. Take West Virginia for example: lowest per capita number of cops, and nearly the lowest per capita blacks.

While the Marxist headline writers here desperately want to hide negro crime data and wrongly defame white people, I think it is important that we get the facts straight. I see a pattern developing where white people are getting blamed for black deeds (Prop 8, mortgage meltdown) and as long as The Elite One is around that is simply not on.

You will criticize the negro community and you will like it, understood?


Because colored folks are known to use crossbows for hunting, etc..

(Beautiful... I LOL'ed. BTW)

 
Fuggin Bizzy 2008-11-30 08:17:26 AM  
GizmoMkI: If the guy shoots an arrow, reloads, then aims again hitting the victim in the head, how is this classified as felonious assault instead of attempted murder?

Is "felonious" even a word? Thelonious Monk is curious about this.

 
Bungalo 2008-11-30 08:35:11 AM  
... or a Muslim.

/let's be honest.

 
RandomKeyStrike 2008-11-30 09:03:41 AM  
Seasons I'v Withered: Question: What kind of bow is this?



I can't find the bow in the picture. I've looked and looked...

/I'll be in my bunk...

 
Luthiel 2008-11-30 09:24:10 AM  
Abzzstain: So it was a family quarrel.

Thread over in the Boobies.

 
spickus 2008-11-30 09:33:26 AM  
Seasons I'v Withered: What kind of bow is this?

Fappomatic 2000?

/Fap

 
theorellior 2008-11-30 09:40:18 AM  
Fuggin Bizzy: Is "felonious" even a word? Thelonious Monk is curious about this.

So is Steely Dan.

 
theorellior 2008-11-30 09:43:44 AM  
swahnhennessy: Was the victim enormously fat drunk?

This is more likely.

 
swahnhennessy 2008-11-30 09:45:38 AM  
Bow fetish?

/too lazy to come up with a Bo Derek quip

 
Endrick 2008-11-30 09:51:20 AM  
And by the way Shorty I thank you.
You could have had them put me in jail son.
I'm just glad I ran out of air hose,
when I come at you with that nail gun.

 
Bored Horde 2008-11-30 09:55:46 AM  
Seasons I'v Withered: Question: What kind of bow is this?



scroll down



Answer: Who gives a shiat


Compound. Real men hunt with a British Yew longbow.

 
cry0fan 2008-11-30 09:56:17 AM  
EliteAnalyst wrote

While the Marxist headline writers here desperately want to hide negro crime data and wrongly defame white people, I think it is important that we get the facts straight. I see a pattern developing where white people are getting blamed for black deeds (Prop 8, mortgage meltdown) and as long as The Elite One is around that is simply not on.


I basically agree with what you are saying, all except for the Marxist part. That is where you are confused. Believe me, the powers that be in this nation have nothing to do with Marxism. Marxism, AS CONCEIVED, was more about controlling the rich, taking away their property. Marxism was not about race.

A better word to use would be "pretend-leftist." There is no real Left in america, but there is a Pretend-Left. THe Pretend Left wants to do what the rich want because the pretend Left is controlled by the rich, by big investors, corporations, etc. Can you see how that is in direct contradiction to the principles of Marxism?

So why do the Rich (and their puppet, the PretendLeft) want to make racial minorities out to be better than they are and make the lower class whites worse than they are?

Well, follow the money? How do the Rich make money and how does putting racial minorities on a pedestal make the rich Richer?

The rich make money in large part by buying Labor. We sell labor. They buy it.

And guess what? THe rich want to pay less for labor. That way their profits go up.

How does putting minorities on a pedestal, ignoring the bad side of nonwhites lower the price the Rich pay for Labor?

Well, one way the rich lower wages is by increasing the supply of labor faster than the demand for labor rises. Supply and demand law will then force down wages.

How can the rich grow the labor supply fast?

How about mass immigration of nonwhite labor from low wage nations?
THat lowers them wages, don't it now?

But how can the rich get those lovely nonwhite low wage immigrants into the workforce? The people of any nation are not going to welcome hordes of immigrants of a different race that are lowering wages, will they?

Well, if you are a rich person (or a lobbyist hired by a lot of rich people), then you want to put out lots of propaganda that will make racial minorities look good and make white people feel ashamed of not liking racial minorities.

And that is the job of the Pretend Left!

All clear?

BTW, a word to the wise--the RightwingGOPers and the PretendLeftistDems that comprise almost all of America (including here on Fark) don't like different or original ideas, and your ideas are different, so they may call you bad names, like troll.

 
KentuckyBob 2008-11-30 10:04:49 AM  
If you have bug killer sitting on your dinner table....you might be a redneck.

 
wilde_at_heart 2008-11-30 10:38:08 AM  
You hear me talking', hillbilly boy? I ain't through with you by a damn sight. I'm gonna get medieval on your ass.

 
d'art 2008-11-30 10:44:24 AM  
I'm sorry, but I can't figure it out. What the hell is "Washington C.H."?

 
mrbill67401 2008-11-30 11:01:30 AM  
d'art: I'm sorry, but I can't figure it out. What the hell is "Washington C.H."?
Washington Court House, Ohio

 
que lastima 2008-11-30 11:48:08 AM  
cry0fan:

All clear?



not at all.

 
cry0fan 2008-11-30 12:51:55 PM  
some people just cannot grasp the essentials of any new and abstract idea. Que lastima!

 
cry0fan 2008-11-30 12:53:21 PM  
or perhaps they pretend not to understand in order to cast aspersions on ideas that place their own tribal loyalties in a bad light

 
subfactorial [TotalFark] 2008-11-30 03:04:40 PM  
Bored Horde: Seasons I'v Withered: Question: What kind of bow is this?



scroll down



Answer: Who gives a shiat

Compound. Real men hunt with a British Yew longbow.


You man have noticed that *she* isn't a real man. She isn't a real woman either judging from those globes either. At least not 100% genuine woman.

Either way you have a touch of teh ghey to be nit-picking about the bow in use in those photos.

 
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