PacManDreaming: "Greetings from The Humungus! The Lord Humungus! The Warrior of the Wasteland! The Ayatollah of Rock and Rolla!"

He doesn't look anything like Humongous

chemical_angel: He doesn't look anything like Humongous

Better?

PacManDreaming: chemical_angel: He doesn't look anything like Humongous

Better?

+7

I was going to announce Subby as Winnar of the Interwebs! - but PacManDreaming stole it away from him.

Nice.

I've been hoping for something like this. Fark ninjas. I want to see pirates vs a real opponent. Islamists will do. Their brand of peace will be very entertaining to see turned on those guys.

Sounds like a CIA inspired plan operation to me.

PacManDreaming: chemical_angel: He doesn't look anything like Humongous

Better?

HA!

You know, no matter what happens this is going to end well.

Am I the only one reminded of the line out of Hot Shots: "This fight should be interesting, both guys work for Don King"...?

But this is bad news! We need those pirates to hold off Global Warming. Where's the chart?

Classic Pirates vs. Ninjas

Pirates:


Ninjas:



(Hotlinked goodness)

I don't think these pirates thought their cunning plan all the way through. What the hell are they going to do if their demands aren't met? Sit there until they starve to death? Sink the ship and kill themselves? WTF?

ne2d: I don't think these pirates thought their cunning plan all the way through. What the hell are they going to do if their demands aren't met? Sit there until they starve to death? Sink the ship and kill themselves? WTF?

Kill the crew one at a time until someone relents. If no one relents, negotiate with the Islamists to sell it and its cargo.

omg, this should be good. Is it gonna be on Pay-Per-View?

scurvydog: You know, no matter what happens this is going to end well.

My thoughts exactly.

The crew of the tanker will be chortling to themselves at the fun and jollity on offer.

Was "What could possibly go wrong?" originally part of this headline? I'm having a weird blackout here.

"What could possibly go wrong?"

Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

Benevolent Misanthrope: ne2d: I don't think these pirates thought their cunning plan all the way through. What the hell are they going to do if their demands aren't met? Sit there until they starve to death? Sink the ship and kill themselves? WTF?

Kill the crew one at a time until someone relents. If no one relents, negotiate with the Islamists to sell it and its cargo.

Oh yeah--it didn't occur to me that hostages were involved. Dur.

Wait, which brown people are the good guys, and which brown people are the bad guys?

/doesn't matter either way

Well We all know that the followers of the Islam will never ever overreact.

And I bet we're going to sell the Islamist weapons to fight these pirates, and it'll work out fine, just like it did in the 90's with Osama Bin Ladin. Amirite?

Sounds to me like Saudis got some nice connections with the local Islamists in Sudan.

Because People in power are Stupid: Classic Pirates vs. Ninjas

Well played sir. Well played.

EliteAnalyst: Islam is a religion, not an ism.

Islam is a religion. Islamism is a political philosophy.

Isn't that ironic, terrorists getting out terrorized.

Benevolent Misanthrope: Kill the crew one at a time until someone relents.

Cut their heads off?
/No blackmail!
//they certainly know how too keep order
///anyone?

This is a win-win situation. The islamofascists attack the pirates. A whole bunch on both sides get killed and the Saudi owned tanker explodes. What's not to like.

I need popcorn.

Obama should use his new powers and speak seekret muslin to them. If he can get us out of this Obama Recession, he surely can persuade some dumb ole pirates to give back the oil.

/That One is not my President.

Good. Let them fight it out and kill each other as much as they like.

merlotguy: Sounds like a CIA inspired plan operation to me.

Let me get this straight. Somalia has been in turmoil for two decades, Warlord backed violent disruption of shipping for the last five years. But if that tanker spills oil? It's Americas fault?

/America, like Alcohol, is the cause and solution to all our problems.

From TFA: If the pirates want peace, they had better release the tanker

I'm not sure that peace is the pirates' primary objective. I'm thinking it's more along the lines of ransom money.

ne2d: Benevolent Misanthrope: ne2d: I don't think these pirates thought their cunning plan all the way through. What the hell are they going to do if their demands aren't met? Sit there until they starve to death? Sink the ship and kill themselves? WTF?

Kill the crew one at a time until someone relents. If no one relents, negotiate with the Islamists to sell it and its cargo.

Oh yeah--it didn't occur to me that hostages were involved. Dur.

There were only 25 or 30 men on that tanker? Not much crew to kill one by one (poor crew!) I have a feeling that the hostages are last on the list of concerns for the Shehab...but that's just my guess.

Am I mistaken or aren't "islamists" called "muslims"?

The English built an empire starting with piracy, I think we should hire these pirates to hijack tankers and sell the oil cheap to us.

And of this would encourage piracy, which would reduce global warming (in honour of His Noodliness), and we can use more gas !

Bad_Seed: EliteAnalyst: Islam is a religion, not an ism.

Islam is a religion. Islamism is a political philosophy.

Good work. Islamism is a better term than Islamic Fundamentalists IMHO.

RandomExcess: Obama should use his new powers and speak seekret muslin to them. If he can get us out of this Obama Recession, he surely can persuade some dumb ole pirates to give back the oil.

/That One is not my President.

actually he is... was it not the same freeper such as your self who spouted off a few months ago "in times of war we have to unit behind our president". back to the point he is your president, QQ more L2P pvp server Noob.

They currently hold at least 17 ships, including a Ukrainian cargo carrying 33 combat tanks destined for South Sudan.

they STILL farking have that??

hm... if they can figure out a way to hijack a refinery, they could use all that stolen oil to fuel the stolen tanks...

will take care of this

wyrlss: Am I mistaken or aren't "islamists" called "muslims"?

See: Bad_Seed

RandomExcess: Obama should use his new powers and speak seekret muslin to them. If he can get us out of this Obama Recession, he surely can persuade some dumb ole pirates to give back the oil.

/That One is not my President.

1/10
A better attempt at trolling would have gone something like this:
"I'd like to see how Obama handles this one, he was so full of rhetoric, promising hope and change, lets see if his bark is bigger than his bite. Personally I don't think anything is going to change, except we are going to observe more failing social programs. I wouldn't be surprised though if America got more buddy-buddy with islao-fascists now that Nobama is in the office. If this all quietly ends, you know that Hussein Obama intervened, farking Muslim anti-American."

sorry about the spelling - fix the errors as you see fit

We need to hear more about the Dubai connections of the pirates. The Baltic dry index has collapsed further and faster than oil has so what's one way to make the availability of tankers decrease? Force the tankers to make the long route around Africa so that any tanker sitting in dock has to be used to make up for the fact that any trip between Asia and Europe is now weeks longer.

wyrlss: Am I mistaken or aren't "islamists" called "muslims"?

That was my reaction, but someone asserted that 'islamist' refers to the political principles of muslim theocracy or something like that, so possibly they aren't jsut making up a redundant word.

"Islamists" is not a word.

Captainbob --

Huh. I never realized that aliens knew the five-point-palm-exploding-heart technique.

It is always nice when problems solve themselves.

The only party I feel sorry for in the whole mess is the hostages. The Saudis have that tanker insured. Probably part of why they are not publicly outraged. Somewhere there is a claims adjuster downing vodka and xanax.

What about "muslimists"?

How about "terrahismists?"

When the jihadis get to the pirates, there will be lots of gunfire. All of it up in the air. There will be people going "li-li-li-li-li-li!", and then a barbecue.

The pirates are Muslims, too. The only reason these jihadis got involved was that the pirates seized an ARAB tanker. That is the only one they are concerned about. And the statement in the article that piracy carries the death penalty under Islamic law is misleadingly incomplete.

It is only when the victims of the piracy are Muslims is there any penalty. Raiding and stealing from infidels, and even enslaving them, is perfectly all right.