PSA: Fellas...don't be suckas! Order a DNA kit and get yourself and the kid swabbed right at the hospital (low-profile, preferably - don't need no biatch cussin' you out about "you don't trust me"). Mail that shiat off and get you some confirmation...because a $250 test is a shiatload cheaper than 18 years of payin' for some other dude's kid!

Oh course, that would not have helped this poor dude - he got screwed by the system...it's unfortunate that the state can't be forced to reimburse the guy and go after the bio-dad for the $12,000...but that would be way too logical.

There is no evil like that found at the heart of an incompetent bureaucracy.

kmmontandon: There is no evil like that found at the heart of an incompetent bureaucracy.

And of course, this is my home state.

yeesh.

Can't they at least get the woman for fraud since she was the one profiting from this full knowing this guy wasn't the father?

LadyHawke: Can't they at least get the woman for fraud since she was the one profiting from this full knowing this guy wasn't the father?

She may not honestly have known.

If the child support system is automated then she has no input into the system other than verifying whatever the State sends her to sign, or just signing stuff.

The "Best Interest of the Child" legal standard under family law completely overrides any considerations of fairness, privacy, logic or even facts on the ground. If the court and child services have you in their sights, they'll suck every penny from you they can, and if you don't and/or can't pay, they'll throw you in jail.

Nevermind the fact of whether it's is in the best interest of society to appropriate every penny possible to guarantee the health of every crackwhore's bastard spawn, so they can grow up to impregnate themselves/others and begin the cycle anew.

Meanwhile, to save humanity from itself, I propose diverting all available GDP output to the invention of realistic-looking robot hookers and holodeck orgies. Granted, this will cause a brief, sharp decline in the human population. But I have the utmost faith that certain secluded Amish sects will grow to reoccupy and repopulate the Earth, and that our burnt-out cities will serve as a proper warning not to repeat our mistakes.

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Something somewhat similar happened to my best friend.
Except he actually thought the kid was his, so he put his name on the birth certificate willingly. He started to become suspicious a few years later and had a DNA test done. Found out the kid wasn't his and that she (psycho biatch) knew the whole time.
He's still paying.

Yet it took The Patriot-News less than an hour to track down the real father, Andre Sharpe, who said the girl that Walter Sharpe has been paying support for has been living with him for the last four years.

If the kid was living with the real father for over half of the time, who was receiving the support payments?

*shakes head.

The newspaper finds the real father in 8 hours where the courts couldn't find him in 7 years.

And I live in this county too. Hope to hell I never have to deal with these courts.

There's something about that story that doesn't add up.

Seven years and never once got a hold of SOMEONE who could help him? Never once filed papers for a fraud investigation? TFA said he didn't even KNOW this woman, or the child's real father. WTF?

If this man was truly a victim of mistaken identity he would have had to have a day in court where he was ordered to pay support and could have, at that time, asked a judge for a paternity test.

Something's got to be missing here. No one could Be that stupid or complacent.

That is a blatant miscarriage.
Of justice, even.

Yay for child support, giving stupid twats money for no reason for decades.

It might not be so bad if the judges thought a little more than:

Are you male? If so, you don't get the children. Does your spouse have a job? If no, you';; be paying an assload for an indefinite amount of time. If yes, you'll be paying 9/10 of an assload for an indefinite time.

Oh, but you get every other weekend.
NOW GTFO MY COURT, SCUM

Thank God for our benevolent government social programs.

SilentStrider: *shakes head.

The newspaper finds the real father in 8 hours where the courts couldn't find him in 7 years

That's what blows my mind. If the guy could have afforded a great attorney, maybe this could have been avoided, is all I can think. It's wrong, it's sad, but it is probably true.

Men paying for kids that aren't their's is not only one of the frauds not prosecuted by the system, it is not only allowed, it is actually supported by the system.

But please! Think of the children!

Social Services doesn't give a damn about the kid. They only care about the state getting its cut from the child support payments.

This happened to me when I was 18. Chick said kid was mine, but I only lost about $1600 in child support, as I demanded a DNA test immediately, and 10 months later it happened. (This was in 1996, and a DNA test was over 2k so I had to push the state to pay for it). The kid wasn't mine, and I asked for reimbursement, and got nothing but chuckles.

I've had other experiences with child support more recently that I wont post here... but it's safe to say in Oregon, don't bother fighting. The woman is always right, and the guy is always wrong and any evidence you try to put forth just makes you look like even more of a deadbeat dad.

In fact, in Oregon you should let them garnish your wages. Even if you write a check and get a reciept, she can go in and say you didn't pay, and they'll take your tax return. I learned this the hard way too. Just let them garnish you so at least you have proof of payment.

discgolfguru: SilentStrider: *shakes head.

The newspaper finds the real father in 8 hours where the courts couldn't find him in 7 years

That's what blows my mind. If the guy could have afforded a great attorney, maybe this could have been avoided, is all I can think. It's wrong, it's sad, but it is probably true.

As someone pointed out, he shoulda just asked for a DNA test, ANY attorney that gave a shiat should have told him that...

gas giant: Something somewhat similar happened to my best friend.
Except he actually thought the kid was his, so he put his name on the birth certificate willingly. He started to become suspicious a few years later and had a DNA test done. Found out the kid wasn't his and that she (psycho biatch) knew the whole time.
He's still paying.

There should be some type of retribution when a man falls victim to this. Women like that make every other woman who are seeking child support legitimately from their children's sperm donors looks like fraudsters. I feel bad for your friend and for the kid involved, having a mother like that.

Meanwhile, women like my sister have to have ex-spouse's wages garnished because he left her and her two children to move in with new love and just assumed my parents would help her out.

So if this happened to you, and the kid that you thought was your son or daughter has been with you/met with you every other weekend for the past 10 years, how would you feel about the child?

Would you still look at your 10 year old son/daughter in the same way, knowing that the past 10 years have been a lie and that they're not really yours? That your ex had just claimed they were so you'd have to pay child support?

The good in me wants to say yes, but I honestly can't say whether I would or not. But I'm not a father yet, so obviously they may feel a bit different.

Time for him to sue the county... and demand a jury trial, with virtually no upper limit on punitive damages (ask for 100 trillion, if you only get a few billion, at least you didn't cut yourself off at the knees by only asking for a few thousand)... see how that turns out.

That is dirt cheap child support.

Interesting how the burden of proof is on alleged fathers to prove they are NOT the parent.

Trinilos: So if this happened to you, and the kid that you thought was your son or daughter has been with you/met with you every other weekend for the past 10 years, how would you feel about the child?

Would you still look at your 10 year old son/daughter in the same way, knowing that the past 10 years have been a lie and that they're not really yours? That your ex had just claimed they were so you'd have to pay child support?

The good in me wants to say yes, but I honestly can't say whether I would or not. But I'm not a father yet, so obviously they may feel a bit different.

The birthday cake is a lie

Shrew2u: PSA: Fellas...don't be suckas! Order a DNA kit and get yourself and the kid swabbed right at the hospital (low-profile, preferably - don't need no biatch cussin' you out about "you don't trust me"). Mail that shiat off and get you some confirmation...because a $250 test is a shiatload cheaper than 18 years of payin' for some other dude's kid!

Or--and hear me out now--maybe you should try to stop banging skanky, manipulative whores.

randomstranger: Shrew2u: PSA: Fellas...don't be suckas! Order a DNA kit and get yourself and the kid swabbed right at the hospital (low-profile, preferably - don't need no biatch cussin' you out about "you don't trust me"). Mail that shiat off and get you some confirmation...because a $250 test is a shiatload cheaper than 18 years of payin' for some other dude's kid!

Or--and hear me out now--maybe you should try to stop banging skanky, manipulative whores.

We can't ALL be gay, dude

randomstranger: Or--and hear me out now--maybe you should try to stop banging skanky, manipulative whores.

But... what id they are reallllly hot?

Barakku: discgolfguru: SilentStrider: *shakes head.

The newspaper finds the real father in 8 hours where the courts couldn't find him in 7 years

That's what blows my mind. If the guy could have afforded a great attorney, maybe this could have been avoided, is all I can think. It's wrong, it's sad, but it is probably true.

As someone pointed out, he shoulda just asked for a DNA test, ANY attorney that gave a shiat should have told him that...

He did ask for a paternity test. FTA:

The agency fought Sharpe's attempts to have DNA testing and said it determined he was the father "after reasonable investigation."

randomstranger: Or--and hear me out now--maybe you should try to stop banging skanky, manipulative whores.

Trick is, they look just like your standard woman.

I think a lot of this could be fixed if all hospitals were legally required to offer fathers DNA tests without the mother's knowledge.

I honestly wouldn't mind seeing some tax dollars go to set up a lab for just this purpose. If you trust the mom, and you're willing to put your name on the birth certificate, good for you. But if you have even the tiniest doubt, you ask for the test.

If it's yours, the mom never finds out, and you live happily ever after. But if you claim the child without asking for the test and it turns out not to be yours, have fun getting the courts to do something about it.

Jeffrey.Rodriguez: randomstranger: Or--and hear me out now--maybe you should try to stop banging skanky, manipulative whores.

Trick is, they look just like your standard woman.

True, but then there's always the sniff test.

CowboyNinjaD: I honestly wouldn't mind seeing some tax dollars go to set up a lab for just this purpose. If you trust the mom, and you're willing to put your name on the birth certificate, good for you. But if you have even the tiniest doubt, you ask for the test.

Make it an opt-out deal.

randomstranger: True, but then there's always the sniff test.

Protip: Get snipped. Lie to the doctor if you need to.

If you really want kids some day, you'll be able to choose when and adopt.

~$140/mo for support. river. cry me one. kid deserved more (his or not).

Wow, after this fiasco it sounds like Kanye's gonna have to rerelease Golddigger.

18 years, 18 years
She got one of yo' kids
Don't even need one of yo' kids
Got you for 18 years

filter: That is dirt cheap child support.

Interesting how the burden of proof is on alleged fathers to prove they are NOT the parent.

ALL children should be genetically tested against the parents at birth. Should the mother/father not be the "mother/father" and this wasn't an exigent (i.e. assisted by other means) birth, the not-parent is notified. Guys can't hide it if they knock up their mistress if she wants to keep baby. There's no reason women should be able to hide it. You want equal rights? Guess what ma'am? They come with equal responsibility.

The child support agency should have to pay this guy the 12 grand.

Effective, implantable (by choice) male birth control should be a priority for research. You want to see the number of "unwanted pregnancies" drop through the floor? Get this into mass production.

Word of warning: I knew a guy that snapped. Probably 1/2 of 1%, if not less, do this. He found out his kids weren't his. He basically got depressed, suicidal, and in the end homicidal. See, she shacked up with the real dad after divorcing him. Unfortunately she had a big farking mouth because she was soaking him. He found out, bang, waves of depression, nausea, betrayal, anger, et al. He went over there one day and shot them and the kids, and finally, himself. He couldn't reconcile his life, the lies, et al.

I don't agree with his actions, and do condemn the shootings, but I can understand why he snapped. The only thing that mattered to him after the divorce were "his" kids. She used them to drag stuff out of him repeatedly. The kids were a weapon to her, and ultimately, that's probably part of what caused the snap.

Procedural Texture: That is a blatant miscarriage.
Of justice, even.

I LOLd!

/it's early in the morning.

I'm thinking I should just have the vasectomy now...

This is why I think every marriage should come with a prenup and every child birth a DNA test. If nothing else it would be ideal to get the kid's real dad put down for hereditary medical conditions and possible organ donors.

CowboyNinjaD: I think a lot of this could be fixed if all hospitals were legally required to offer fathers DNA tests without the mother's knowledge.

I honestly wouldn't mind seeing some tax dollars go to set up a lab for just this purpose. If you trust the mom, and you're willing to put your name on the birth certificate, good for you. But if you have even the tiniest doubt, you ask for the test.

If it's yours, the mom never finds out, and you live happily ever after. But if you claim the child without asking for the test and it turns out not to be yours, have fun getting the courts to do something about it.

I think it should be a blanket requirement to test the DNA of the child against BOTH parents. I would also require them to sign an exigent birth circumstances waiver should it come back as not matching one (or both).

Ksilebo: I'm thinking I should just have the vasectomy now...

Good luck if you're under 30. This is why we need implantable male birth control. 1-10 years of not worrying about swimmers.

Couldn't they have just called Maury?

FTFA: Sharpe's attorney, Tabetha Tanner, said the county Domestic Relations office "stole" Sharpe's identity by exchanging his date of birth, address and Social Security number for that of the father.

Not to validate what happened but how does it benefit the Domestic Relations to steal his identity?

Maybe the real father stole the victim's identity in order to circumvent child support.

I don't want to call shenanigans just yet. Maybe I'll text shenanigans and see if I get a response.

/the child support system needs to be refreshed

inglixthemad:

I think it should be a blanket requirement to test the DNA of the child against BOTH parents. I would also require them to sign an exigent birth circumstances waiver should it come back as not matching one (or both).

I'm curious as to why you think they should test the mother's DNA. Wouldn't the fact that the child just slid out of the woman's vagina be enough to convince most people that she is the mother?

Britney Spear's Speculum: FTFA: Sharpe's attorney, Tabetha Tanner, said the county Domestic Relations office "stole" Sharpe's identity by exchanging his date of birth, address and Social Security number for that of the father.

Not to validate what happened but how does it benefit the Domestic Relations to steal his identity?

Maybe the real father stole the victim's identity in order to circumvent child support.

I don't want to call shenanigans just yet. Maybe I'll text shenanigans and see if I get a response.

/the child support system needs to be refreshed


I'd chalk it up to laziness. The newspapers says it tracked down the real father in about an hour, but maybe he wasn't on the grid when the child was born. No phone, utility bills, etc. in his name.

So instead of creating a big mess of paperwork, they found a guy with a similar name and stuck it on him. Just look what happened in Florida in 2000 when they disqualified thousands of voters whose names were similar to convicted felons.

This is the scariest thing about bureaucracy. Conspiracy theorists always want to see some grand mastermind pulling the strings for some evil purpose, when it's more likely just millions of worker bees who don't want to be bothered to do their jobs properly. And forget about them putting forth a little extra effort to address problems that might not fit specifically within their job descriptions.

Just watch Brazil, and you'll see what I'm talking about.

JustTheTip: inglixthemad:

I think it should be a blanket requirement to test the DNA of the child against BOTH parents. I would also require them to sign an exigent birth circumstances waiver should it come back as not matching one (or both).

I'm curious as to why you think they should test the mother's DNA. Wouldn't the fact that the child just slid out of the woman's vagina be enough to convince most people that she is the mother?

Well, it's a legal document just in case. She can't, in any fathomable way, come back later and claim she didn't know. On the plus side for both parents if they did use something like in-vitro, it would let them know if there was a c*ck up in the IVF clinic.

Basically though, it's i dotting and t crossing.

My Cousin Dan was married for 12 years to the mother of his 3 children, then one day out of the blue she came up to him and said I'm pregnant with my bosses baby and I want a divorce. Oh and the other 3 kids are probably his too. Dan files for divorce and during the divorce paternity tests are done, she right, none of the kids are his. Dan fights, wins custody and is raising all 4 children, she and the boss are both paying Dan child support. So occasionally the courts get it right. I asked Dan why he fought so hard and spent so much time, effort and money for custody and he responded with 2 things. #1 he is the father to these kids, no matter who donated the sperm and #2 how could he let this crazy biatch raise any children.

JustTheTip: I'm curious as to why you think they should test the mother's DNA. Wouldn't the fact that the child just slid out of the woman's vagina be enough to convince most people that she is the mother?

Duh; it might be a changeling. You gotta watch out for those tricky bastards.

TheAbstractor: The "Best Interest of the Child" legal standard under family law completely overrides any considerations of fairness, privacy, logic or even facts on the ground. If the court and child services have you in their sights, they'll suck every penny from you they can, and if you don't and/or can't pay, they'll throw you in jail.

This. Guys; don't expect fairness or even rationality from anyone involved in Child Services. Oh, and get a DNA test.

litrick35: My Cousin Dan was married for 12 years to the mother of his 3 children, then one day out of the blue she came up to him and said I'm pregnant with my bosses baby and I want a divorce. Oh and the other 3 kids are probably his too. Dan files for divorce and during the divorce paternity tests are done, she right, none of the kids are his. Dan fights, wins custody and is raising all 4 children, she and the boss are both paying Dan child support. So occasionally the courts get it right. I asked Dan why he fought so hard and spent so much time, effort and money for custody and he responded with 2 things. #1 he is the father to these kids, no matter who donated the sperm and #2 how could he let this crazy biatch raise any children.

I like Dan. Give him a hearty Hero tag next time you buy him a beer.

JustTheTip: I'm curious as to why you think they should test the mother's DNA. Wouldn't the fact that the child just slid out of the woman's vagina be enough to convince most people that she is the mother?

In general, yes. But we've been fooled before:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mary_Tofts