That sucks

/you came here for this

With a gas station vacuum? He's lucky it didn't suck it right off!

He might as well get his quarters' worth.

That's because "blowjob" is a misnomer. It really should be called "suckjob" instead.

/One of my classmates peed in a carwash vacuum once.

I lost my penis in a vacuum cleaner accident, so I'm really getting a ::breaks down sobbing::

was it consensual?

Imagine if you were Asian and your surname was Kok and someone poked a vacuum clearer at you while it was running and it got your arm and it sort of sucked on your arm for a bit.

sucker

Leskay: Imagine if you were Asian and your surname was Kok and someone poked a vacuum clearer at you while it was running and it got your arm and it sort of sucked on your arm for a bit.

I imagine that ALL the time. What's your point?

what a sucker

That blows.

/wait...
//I'm doing it wrong

vice_magnet: That's because "blowjob" is a misnomer. It really should be called "suckjob" instead.


Uh oh. Guess I should change my method then.

approve

Seriously? with the cost of a car wash, it would probably be cheaper to rent a hooker.

myalias1845: vice_magnet: That's because "blowjob" is a misnomer. It really should be called "suckjob" instead.


Uh oh. Guess I should change my method then.

I used to think that too until one day someone explained to me that your KOK does the blowing at the end of the sucking.

So they are both korrect to some extent.

Leskay: Imagine if you were Asian and your surname was Kok and someone poked a vacuum clearer at you while it was running and it got your arm and it sort of sucked on your arm for a bit.



I'm not familiar with that appliance

wax on. wax off.

¿ǝɹǝɥʍ sǝoƃ sıuǝd

That's just how they roll in Swan Creek Township, Michigan.

/ what was "by the 2nd oak tree past the village bumpkin" too exact of a locale?

Is there anything vacuums can't do?

friend49: Is there anything vacuums can't do?

Be faithful :'(

Deputy Doofy: Mom said that when I wear this badge you're supposed to treat me like a man of the law.

Buffy Gilmore: Yeah, and Mom also said for you to stop sticking your dick in the vacuum cleaner!

/Why has this not been mentioned already?

God Bless America, and vacuums, especially Hoover. This story just brings back some good ole memories. Now if you'll excuuuse me, I need to go vacuum...at this ungodly hour...

IAmSofaKingWeToddEd: I lost my penis in a vacuum cleaner accident, so I'm really getting a ::breaks down sobbing::

That was you? I read that story in one of the first Darwin Award books when I was in high school.

"I misunderstood the question..."

InternationalShoe: Leskay: Imagine if you were Asian and your surname was Kok and someone poked a vacuum clearer at you while it was running and it got your arm and it sort of sucked on your arm for a bit.

I'm not familiar with that appliance

You have made me feel sad and listless.

That sucks!

He took full service car wash to a whole new level I guess

vaccumse.cx anyone?

You're plooking to hard!!

/thanks Frank

Was he in a Hummer?

Is it just me, or would this actually look decent on a t-shirt?

I was just giving my Probe a hand wash this morning.

Years ago, I used to work at a small light-industrial shop where the employees would really tease each other. There was this one guy at the shop who was a nice guy, but not too bright. I used to find various ways to mess with his mind, just for fun.

So one day, I asked him: "Nic, is it true about guys and hose vacuum cleaners?"

He turned about 15 colors and started yelling: "HOW DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT? WOMEN AREN'T SUPPOSED TO KNOW ABOUT THAT!"

So I put a clueless, surprised look on my face and said: "Know about what?"
I then just looked at him with that dumb look.

He sputtered: "About guys! And how they... uhhh..."

Me: "Do what? You telling me that guys actually would..."

Nic: "Yes! NO! I mean..."

Me: (arching eyebrow) "What were YOU thinking of?"

The look on his face was priceless. All he could do was sputter: "You.. . YOU... you.... you... ah forget it!" and he just walked off.

I cracked up silently for the rest of the afternoon. Good times... ;-D

I wonder what is fark handle is?

They didn't even let him finish? That blows...

Was he the "pitcher" or the "catcher"?

If the former, is he now "ribbed for her pleasure"?



Ba-dum tsss.

"I've seen some strange things, but this is the weirdest thing I ever heard," he said.



I thought the mental image was bad, but the mental audio is worse.

monkeymonkey: Is it just me, or would this actually look decent on a t-shirt?

Me too.

I always hate when someone posts in these threads and has nothing to add other than "hey, that's my hometown" or "I grew up with that guy".

//born and raised in Thomas Township.

interesting.

Fizt4hire: They didn't even let him finish? That blows...

No it doesn't. Or it didn't should I say.

myalias1845: Uh oh. Guess I should change my method then.

What would your new method be like? Please describe it in detail.

styckx: That sucks

/you came here for this

This.....

Durendal: With a gas station vacuum? He's lucky it didn't suck it right off!

but also, this. I've lost cutlery to those lethal suction devices.

Approves

Orbital Sander is jealous...

Yankees Team Gynecologist: myalias1845: Uh oh. Guess I should change my method then.

What would your new method be like? Please describe it in detail.

Lots of teeth. Yes?

myalias1845: Lots of teeth. Yes?

Hmmm...how worn are your incisors?

Yankees Team Gynecologist: myalias1845: Lots of teeth. Yes?

Hmmm...how worn are your incisors?

You calling me a slut?