Wait for it. When you see it.... (new window)

Late night TV, probably NSFW though

If you didn't break your arm in the 1st 15 minutes it became a part of your 30 ft bike-jump ramp.

/them's the rules

Irwin Mainway: No! Look, we put a label on every bag that says, "Kid! Be careful - broken glass!" I mean, we sell a lot of products in the "Bag O'" line.. like Bag O' Glass, Bag O' Nails, Bag O' Bugs, Bag O' Vipers, Bag O' Sulfuric Acid. They're decent toys, you know what I mean?

/my dad was the head legal counsel in the Consumer Product Safety Commission when I was a kid...needless to say, I never had a skateboard or a BB gun

The fact that Nerf finally started selling refill packs for their darts should earn them immunity from lawsuits due to stupid children.

Voluntary recall just means the kids who have fun with them get to keep them.

Anyone ever cut a racketball ball in half and stick it on your forehead to give yourself horns? And then have them give you dual blood blisters that last for days?

sword fights with hot wheels track.
big wheel demolition derbies in the middle of the street at the bottom of the big hill.
good times. good times.

'nuff said

KellyLockhart: 'nuff said

That was my favorite

Tr0mBoNe: Anyone ever cut a racketball ball in half and stick it on your forehead to give yourself horns? And then have them give you dual blood blisters that last for days?

No, but I played with my dad's snakebite kit once. I put the suction thingies on either side of my neck and ran around being Frankenstein for about 30 minutes. I was SHOCKED to discover I had perfectly oval hickies when I removed them. Try having to explain THAT to your classmates :D

My dad still has a set of Jarts in the garage.

Lets not forget this great way to put your eye out, still available as late as 1985 or so, since that's when I bought one:

Earguy: My dad still has a set of Jarts in the garage.

Lets not forget this great way to put your eye out, still available as late as 1985 or so, since that's when I bought one:

That has to be the greatest example of shameless marketing. They couldn't even make it a phaser.

Ah yes, back when the company I used to work for was fun to work for I had an office Nerf gun. Air powered, suction cup tipped. I did corporate presentations and laser pointers were just starting to get cheap enough so I bought a Radio Shack model about the size of a Magic Marker.

Nerf gun + laser pointer + duct tape = hours of fun while waiting for compiles and tape unloads. Draw a target on a whiteboard for a little precision practice. I had that sucker so well sighted in I could hit (and kill) the occasional house fly that made it into my office.

Ah, to be thirty again. Stupid corporate liability laws. That and the dot com bust.

Weaps: Ah yes, back when the company I used to work for was fun to work for I had an office Nerf gun. Air powered, suction cup tipped. I did corporate presentations and laser pointers were just starting to get cheap enough so I bought a Radio Shack model about the size of a Magic Marker.

Nerf gun + laser pointer + duct tape = hours of fun while waiting for compiles and tape unloads. Draw a target on a whiteboard for a little precision practice. I had that sucker so well sighted in I could hit (and kill) the occasional house fly that made it into my office.

Ah, to be thirty again. Stupid corporate liability laws. That and the dot com bust.

Heh, that's all kinds of awesome.

Dread Pirate Slasher: No, but I played with my dad's snakebite kit once. I put the suction thingies on either side of my neck and ran around being Frankenstein for about 30 minutes. I was SHOCKED to discover I had perfectly oval hickies when I removed them.

I thought I was the only one dumb enough to have done that.

elvisaintdead: sword fights with hot wheels track.

One time I shot off my smart mouth one time too many and the nearest thing my mom could find to beat my ass with was a section of Hot Wheel track. Usually when she whacked me with something I nearly laughed.

Not that time. Or ever again. I calmed way down after that.

bruising, cuts, blood blisters, and welts on the face, neck, and chest

...and my shoes fell off! Oh Gawd!

Reminds me of the hot wheels "fleshripper" I had as a lad.
It was supposed to accelerate cars around the track and it did rather well. But woe be unto the poor soul who got too close to those blood hungry wheels of battery powered death.



/not exactly the one ... but close enough.

Mugato: ...and my shoes fell off! Oh Gawd!



"I'm only scarred about the face, breast, chest, neck, and head. Other than that I look fine - a little makeup conceals everything."

Clackers?

(new window)

/ link hot, can cause burns

dillenger69: Reminds me of the hot wheels "fleshripper" I had as a lad.

Had that too, but the most dangerous thing I had by far was the Mattel Thing Maker. It was a double boiler that heated "plastigoop" in metal bug-shaped molds to more than 300 degrees. Yes, we played with it unsupervised.

That's funny...I didn't know they had released Domestic Violence Barbie and Bail Jumping Ken.

Caulfield: Had that too, but the most dangerous thing I had by far was the Mattel Thing Maker. It was a double boiler that heated "plastigoop" in metal bug-shaped molds to more than 300 degrees. Yes, we played with it unsupervised.

oh yeah-
remember the smell?

creepy crawlers FTW.

KellyLockhart: 'nuff said

Absol-farking-lutely!

When she was 3, my cousin's daughter got this doll for Christmas. She loved it. However, if you weren't careful (or loved things chomping on you), it hurt to get your finger stuck in its mouth. The doll ended up being recalled do to chomping on little girls' hair.

It was a fun toy.

elvisaintdead: remember the smell?

Yes. The fumes were probably carcinogenic.

I once picked a lizard out of the mold while it was still so hot I couldn't hold on to it. I dropped it on the top of my foot, resulting in a reptile-shaped blister. Fortunately it was summer, so I didn't have to wear shoes for a while.

Kids today are pussies. Don't even get me started with the whole emulating Evel Knievel on the bikes thing.

not a single sex toy joke yet? bruises and welts? Guess it's sunday

Caulfield: Kids today are pussies.

I have three boys. They have real practice swords, many bow staffs (homemade, bow and arrows, paint ball guns, etc.

Their grandparents used to send them beanie babies when they were little. I used to chase them around the house every night and try to hit them with the beanie babies. If they got hit, they had to drop down and do three push-ups. (Three boys have a lot of energy -- it needs to be channeled somewhere!)

They are not, and never have been pussies.

Just saying.

Here is my 15 year old breaking 7 bricks:



They break boards and bricks once a year as a practice in focus. It isn't a regular "try to show off" event.

Caulfield: Don't even get me started with the whole emulating Evel Knievel on the bikes thing.


schwinn Sting Ray with the 'banana seat' + 1 2x8 board + trashcans =
many frenzied after-school afternoons.

no burns, but plenty of bruises and lost skin. And we liked it!

kids today ARE pussies. they'll all have arthritic thumbs and carpal tunnel by 25.
off my lawn!
yahhhhhhhhhh!

ExJerseyGirl: They are not, and never have been pussies.

And props to you, EJG.

elvisaintdead: And props to you, EJG.

Ditto, sounds like you are doing a good job. But I stand behind the assertion that in general we are raising a generation of kids who are the opposite of yours.

ExJerseyGirl: They break boards and bricks once a year as a practice in focus. It isn't a regular "try to show off" event.

Practice in focus. Right. Which is why you take pictures, why you post them in response to the labels of "pussy", and why the number of bricks is significant.

Just sayin'.

BTW - not that I'm against what you and yours are doing. I just seriously doubt that a teenage boy is focused enough not to see the whole "breaking shiat with your fists" thing as anything other than an opportunity to show of his skills. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Benevolent Misanthrope: Practice in focus. Right. Which is why you take pictures, why you post them in response to the labels of "pussy", and why the number of bricks is significant.

Just sayin'.

Understood. What can I say? I am very proud of him. And the exercise really is about focus -- he can't help it if his mom likes to brag about him.

It isn't like I posted a picture of me breaking boards.

Benevolent Misanthrope: BTW - not that I'm against what you and yours are doing. I just seriously doubt that a teenage boy is focused enough not to see the whole "breaking shiat with your fists" thing as anything other than an opportunity to show of his skills. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

You can't physically do this unless you are totally focused. And yes, a teenager can understand that.

Showing off? This wasn't even in class. It was a special seminar with about 10 people including us doting parents.

ExJerseyGirl: i188.photobucket.com

How many toes did he break when the cinder block fell on them?

;)

Caulfield: elvisaintdead: And props to you, EJG.

Ditto, sounds like you are doing a good job. But I stand behind the assertion that in general we are raising a generation of kids who are the opposite of yours.

I am not sure about that. My sons have a lot of friends who are just as scrappy as they are. I have to leave in a few minutes to drive my 12 year old to a skateboard park with some friends. I won't stay and watch -- I can't handle seeing them do some of the tricks off the ramps.

When I was a lad, my dad got me all kinds of cool toys.

When I was 13 he got me a Winchester 12ga shotgun.

At 14 it was my Boobiesol: a Ruger Redhawk .44 magnum revolver. His rationale was that it was almost as big as me, thus I'm unlikely to stuff it into a sock and take it to school to handle some bully (not that there was any threat of that.)

For christmas santa dad got me a Ruger 10/22 .22 cal rifle.

At 15 he got me a Honda XL 80 street/dirt motorcycle (said only nerds ride mopeds; he didn't want his son being a nerd, even though I am.) I got so many scars thrashing that bike around that I decided to trade it in for something safer: a Colt 1911 .45ACP.

At 16 we bought an M1917 WWI surplus rifle in .30-06.

Compound bow (still have, still use) to kill bambi.

See, if you give kids fun toys and trust them, but stipulate that if you get caught doing drugs, drinking, stealing, etc. daddy would take all that shiat away. Can't have that. Besides I was too busy putting holes in water heaters at the range and tramping through the forest to mess around with drugs.

Women were a whole 'nother issue. Hooking up with chicks was encouraged ("honey, good news! Our son isn't gay!" when I came home from the girlfriends house with a big shiat-eating grin on my face.) Just don't get anyone pregnant. So I didn't, that I know of.

Weaps: At 14 it was my Boobies

Your dad paid for your boobies?

/I like it when a mod gets filterpwned.

Flab: Weaps: At 14 it was my Boobies

Your dad paid for your boobies?

/I like it when a mod gets filterpwned.

Ha! Didn't even see that. Yeah, we're subject to the filter. Interesting that the filter considers a first [word that is synonymous with handgun] to be boobies-worthy.

Most dangerous toy I ever had as a kid was a 1970 Mustang.

I miss Lawn Darts. The metal ones, not the marginally safer plastic ones.

Darwin thinned the herd better in those days.

I threw out an honest to god LAWN DARTS retail box with rings and darts last week. They were gonna sell it at a church garage sale.

I'd have titled the link "Nerf nerfed"

I can't wait for the NERF Desert Eagle, made in Israel.

It's like when these were taken off the market due to the balls breaking off and hitting people:



/I had some wooden ones in 2nd grade, my teacher took them away from me.
//I know, not get off my lawn!

We actually have one of those guns in the office right now. Yes, they hurt.

Remember when it was a right of passage if you made it to age 18, now it's like they are handing out gene pool coupons to stupid people.

So what, when I was growing up Tonka toys were metal with fairly sharp edges come to think of it.

I loved those trucks, wish to hell I still had them today. I also wish I still had the original GI Joe's. They were the full size versions.

My aunt was dating a guy that worked for Hasbro at the time so I got all the Hasbro toys of the mid 60's to mid 70's.

Caulfield: the most dangerous thing I had by far was the Mattel Thing Maker. It was a double boiler that heated "plastigoop" in metal bug-shaped molds to more than 300 degrees. Yes, we played with it unsupervised.

Those things were the shiat! I just to make the big tarantula things, but the buggers were too big to cook all the way through, so you had this thing that was cool enough to pull out by the legs an whatnot, but the thorax was filled with molten goop stuff. I do remember the smell...I smelled it somewhere the other day and it took me forever to place.

My favorite though were the home science kits, and craft kits. I remember getting in trouble because I got an electronics kit with a little soldering gun, and being in the corner behind the drapes, soldering. The damn thing had like a 16" cord...