Good thing Halloween is coming up then, isn't it?

So what reasons ARE they buried for?

Is there a Ralph's around here?

Things don't stay buried on this island.

Hell, it was not too long ago that bodies were not being cremated for financial reasons even after the family paid for it.

They're just spending the time dead for tax reasons.

Hey, just dump them in our drinking water supply, the filters will just sift them out. Or stick them in a green bin on garbage day, pigs will eat anybody.

Zombie Apocalypse Stage 1 begins.

All flesh must be eaten.

There let him sink and be the seas on him.

It took a month for my grandfather to be buried after he died, due to a grave diggers strike, so I'm really getting a kick out of these replies.

/Seriously. He died a month before I was born and was buried a day or two before I was born.

Why waste the money on undertakers and frippery like that, I used my backhoe to dig my grave already and I have 300 lbs of quicklime in the shed, the kid knows when I drop dead just to roll my ass into the big hole out back, sprinkle some of the white crap in the shed over me, then use the backhoe to push a couple feet of soil on top as a cover, wait a year or two for nature to take its course, then plant some beans or other crop over me, problem solved.

Pribar: Why waste the money on undertakers and frippery like that, I used my backhoe to dig my grave already and I have 300 lbs of quicklime in the shed, the kid knows when I drop dead just to roll my ass into the big hole out back, sprinkle some of the white crap in the shed over me, then use the backhoe to push a couple feet of soil on top as a cover, wait a year or two for nature to take its course, then plant some beans or other crop over me, problem solved.

Why wait?

Fred! I think we've got an eater!

FormlessOne: Pribar: Why waste the money on undertakers and frippery like that, I used my backhoe to dig my grave already and I have 300 lbs of quicklime in the shed, the kid knows when I drop dead just to roll my ass into the big hole out back, sprinkle some of the white crap in the shed over me, then use the backhoe to push a couple feet of soil on top as a cover, wait a year or two for nature to take its course, then plant some beans or other crop over me, problem solved.

Why wait?

quicklime gives me a rash, plus I'm claustrophobic.

In related News, stocks in SoylentCo™ up 40% in the last week.

Financial crisis has gotten so bad that dead bodies are no longer being buried for financial reasons.

Instead, live bodies are being buried for financial reasons.

Does this mean I won't get the gravestone I want?

In case of zombie uprising, kill first.

/stole idea from previous farker post.

What a rotting economy.

whizbang: Financial crisis has gotten so bad that dead bodies are no longer being buried for financial reasons.

Instead, live bodies are being buried for financial reasons.

Financial bodies are being buried alive!

Spending a year dead, for tax purposes.

/Obscure? I hope not.

Gordon Brown doesn't care about dead people.

What then are they doing with the bodies that is somehow saving money?

Well, we can burn her, bury her, or dump her. (new window)

XMark: So what reasons ARE they buried for?

Because they get really nasty after 6 or 7 days.

In the ideal financial plan, the check to the undertaker bounces.

Came for the 'bring out your dead' references, leaves disappointed.

Sonic Yawn: They're just spending the time dead for tax reasons.

/came here for the Hotblack Desaito reference.
//leaves fulfilled.
///does not leave in the Disaster Area stuntship.

i for one welcome our festering corpse overlords. brains!!!

Eh just put the corpses somewhere with alot of carrion birds like turkey vultures or crows. Problem solved.

Approve of dead bodies everywhere

With a war, stock market collapse, and political campaign all going on at the same time, how is it that Saturday Night Live remains the unfunniest show on TV? C'mon people, the material is right there...

Meh. The funeral industry is a massive scam anyway. Donate your cadaver to the nearest medical school. if I die within 200 miles of Knoxville, what used to be me goes here:

The Body Farm (new window)

Fed to pigs would be good. Mmmm, sausage!

EmployeeOfTheMinute: With a war, stock market collapse, and political campaign all going on at the same time, how is it that Saturday Night Live remains the unfunniest show on TV? C'mon people, the material is right there...

They have 1 or 2 talented cast members and the rest of them suck. I'm guessing the writing staff is similarly ill-equipped.

They need to do another fire/hire cycle with the whole crew. Or just cancel the show.

Dubai Vol: The funeral industry is a massive scam anyway.

There's a reason social security only pays $300 death benefits. It should only cost about $300 in natural gas and oven cleaning labor to get rid of a body. Or additionally, we could let bodies rot, and use the decomposition byproducts as fuel! Africa could be rich!


/island seat please

burrgrinder: EmployeeOfTheMinute: With a war, stock market collapse, and political campaign all going on at the same time, how is it that Saturday Night Live remains the unfunniest show on TV? C'mon people, the material is right there...

They have 1 or 2 talented cast members and the rest of them suck. I'm guessing the writing staff is similarly ill-equipped.

They need to do another fire/hire cycle with the whole crew. Or just cancel the show.


I'd just be happy if they'd dump Kenan Thompson. I don't think he could recite the Alphabet without looking at a cue card...


/not racist, just think he sucks

why not take some of the lazy sacks they are paying welfare to and hand them a shovel instead of foodstamps?

Soylent Green

burrgrinder: Dubai Vol: The funeral industry is a massive scam anyway.

There's a reason social security only pays $300 death benefits. It should only cost about $300 in natural gas and oven cleaning labor to get rid of a body. Or additionally, we could let bodies rot, and use the decomposition byproducts as fuel! Africa could be rich!


/island seat please

Cremation is a waste of perfectly good organic material. Not to mention th eunneceassary CO₂ emissions. Compost FTW! Or, just as seriously, feed it to pigs. Call me squeamish, but making human cadavers directly into human food is where I draw the line.

Yeah, yeah, soylent green....

eggrolls: Spending a year dead, for tax purposes.

Came in to make this reference. Leaving satisfied yet sad that I was beaten to it.

/how are we for time?

Sonic Yawn: They're just spending the time dead for tax reasons.

Came here for this. Leaving satisfied. I'd give you one internets if I could.

The situation is considered grave.

If only the nanny state (just had to say it) has the forethought to buy half a million plastic coffins for "just such an occasion".

Dubai Vol:
Cremation is a waste of perfectly good organic material. Not to mention th eunneceassary CO2 emissions. Compost FTW! Or, just as seriously, feed it to pigs.

In Tibet they do something called "sky burial", where they literally cut up the dead and feed them to vultures at special altars on mountain tops. In Tibetan Buddhism this is seen as an act of compassion - ie feeding other living beings. Also, they view the body as unimportant after death. Once the spirit has passed away from it, the body is viewed as simply meat.

The Chinese initially banned this practice because they saw it as barbaric and unsanitary, but now it's apparently being allowed and is happening again.

/They also do river burial in some parts
//Same idea except cut up and feed to the fishies instead of vultures

Of course they aren't planting the dead - Obama needs voters!

Once again the Daily Fail pulls a concoction of various brands of shiate out of its collective arse and calls it 'news'.

meekychuppet: Once again the Daily Fail pulls a concoction of various brands of shiate out of its collective arse and calls it 'news'.

Hey, it's in the public interest to know about Kerry Katona and her fatness.

if you tie these corpses to some sort of drive shaft, then we could connect them up to dynamoes to generate electricity, as they roll, in what would have been their graves..