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(Telegraph) Cool Man receives new leg after a drink at his local pub. He thought he lost it to a mosquito but the doctor at the pub is pretty sure it was a tiger. On the upside the doctor did happen to have a spare bionic leg available   (telegraph.co.uk) divider line 51
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HaywoodJablonski [TotalFark] 2008-09-28 11:15:35 AM  
1) The skit blames a virus, not a mosquito
2) Was the tiger 11 foot long with razor sharp teeth?

 
HaywoodJablonski [TotalFark] 2008-09-28 11:17:54 AM  
Meaning of Life: Killing Each Other (new window)

Uhh,... I think I'd better come clean with you about this. It's, um,-- it's not a virus, I'm afraid. You see, a virus is what we doctors call very, very small. So small, it could not possibly have made off with a whole leg. What we're looking for here is, I think,-- And this is no more than an educated guess. I'd like to make that clear. ...Is some multi-cellular life form with stripes, huge razor-sharp teeth, about eleven foot long, and of the genus Felis Horribilis: what we doctors, in fact, call a 'tiger'.

 
CravenMorehead 2008-09-28 12:50:45 PM  
"A tiger, in Africa?"

 
abb3w [TotalFark] 2008-09-28 01:17:15 PM  
You'd be surprised at a man with a third leg giving it away.

 
glenlivid 2008-09-28 02:09:16 PM  
This is why it's bad to drink alone.

Seriously, great story.

 
Ashtrey 2008-09-28 02:09:29 PM  
'Cause we haven't all heard that one.
"I got this bionic leg out in my trunk man, it's completely legit. I'll hook it up for a beer."

 
cpw49684 [TotalFark] 2008-09-28 02:09:31 PM  
So, it'll grow back then?

 
Prof_Moriarity 2008-09-28 02:10:30 PM  
bastet.uncg.edu

 
Cosmic Crab 2008-09-28 02:12:08 PM  
Pull the other one, it's got bells on.

 
pelicanman 2008-09-28 02:12:55 PM  
"Mr Huckvale had his leg amputated when he was 29 after a benign tumour was removed.'

Somehow that doesn't sound too "benign".

 
One-Armed Badger 2008-09-28 02:12:56 PM  
He didn't leave the pub legless.

 
Bermuda59 2008-09-28 02:14:40 PM  
See... drinking can solve problems!

 
Bacon 2008-09-28 02:16:07 PM  
CravenMorehead: "A tiger, in Africa?"

It's more likely than you think.

 
JesterGirl [TotalFark] 2008-09-28 02:18:48 PM  
bp2.blogger.com

 
Zamboro [recently expired TotalFark] 2008-09-28 02:20:01 PM  
Thank goodness for science. =]

 
Miss Smartass 2008-09-28 02:20:59 PM  
Bionic?
Sweet. Soon we can all be like her:
i274.photobucket.com
She's my idol!

 
crazypeltast52 2008-09-28 02:25:55 PM  
I blame Zulus

 
kbarham 2008-09-28 02:28:57 PM  
crazypeltast52: I blame Zulus

I like the Tutsis myself. They're the only group with a rolled candy named after them.

/got nothin'

 
holiday_inn_in_cambodia 2008-09-28 02:35:47 PM  
kbarham: crazypeltast52: I blame Zulus

I like the Tutsis myself. They're the only group with a rolled candy named after them.

/got nothin'


ahh but you forget about the Ho-hos of Mongolia

 
Renegade Pancake 2008-09-28 02:37:10 PM  
Talk about a shoehorned reference.

-1, Subby.

 
WFern 2008-09-28 02:38:03 PM  
holiday_inn_in_cambodia: kbarham: crazypeltast52: I blame Zulus

I like the Tutsis myself. They're the only group with a rolled candy named after them.

/got nothin'

ahh but you forget about the Ho-hos of Mongolia


Ho-Hos are, in fact, a snack and not a candy.

 
Dellirium 2008-09-28 02:38:33 PM  
What?
No HERO tag?

 
trentrockport 2008-09-28 03:04:29 PM  
So this is the great promise of socialized medicine? Hoping for a chance encounter in a pub to receive treatment?

/if the US healthcare system is broken, I pity the day Government "fixes" it.

 
ehrichweiss 2008-09-28 03:04:31 PM  
HaywoodJablonski: 1) The skit blames a virus, not a mosquito
2) Was the tiger 11 foot long with razor sharp teeth?


Actually it started out implying it was a mosquito that had eaten through the mosquito net then later the doctor said it was a virus.

/how many people picked up on the fact that tigers are NOT from Africa?
//Asia is where tigers are from and the only ones you'd find in Africa would indeed be in a zoo.

 
jaylectricity [TotalFark] 2008-09-28 03:04:51 PM  
Renegade Pancake: Talk about a shoehorned reference.

-1, Subby.


I read the story 3 times trying to figure out what the headline was talking about.

Still don't get the reference.

 
Jurodan 2008-09-28 03:05:15 PM  
I agree with Dellirium. The guy apparently gave the guy a £40,000 leg for free. He just ate a £40,000 for a complete stranger, and his thought is? He's pleased to have been able to help. The guy deserves praise!

 
EnderX 2008-09-28 03:05:37 PM  
www.adventureclassicgaming.com

OH, A leg!

 
DosMas 2008-09-28 03:06:39 PM  
Botched headline, good story. I'd say he needs to keep buying those lottery tickets while this lucky streak is going.


/+0.5

 
bentheguard [TotalFark] 2008-09-28 03:08:47 PM  
Search the thicket!

 
push_the_button 2008-09-28 03:10:51 PM  
Cravenmorehead
It must have escaped from the zoo.

 
simian04 2008-09-28 03:11:17 PM  
Miss Smartass: Bionic?
Sweet. Soon we can all be like her:

She's my idol!


I swoon!

/swoon, swoon

 
Miss Smartass 2008-09-28 03:13:21 PM  
simian04: Miss Smartass: Bionic?
Sweet. Soon we can all be like her:

She's my idol!

I swoon!

/swoon, swoon


At me or Motoko?

 
Relatively Obscure [TotalFark] 2008-09-28 03:14:40 PM  
trentrockport: So this is the great promise of socialized medicine? Hoping for a chance encounter in a pub to receive treatment?

/if the US healthcare system is broken, I pity the day Government "fixes" it.


Yes. Of all things, THAT is the lesson to walk away from this story with.

The hell is wrong with you?

 
xria 2008-09-28 03:27:18 PM  
CravenMorehead: "A tiger, in Africa?"

Only in Kenya?

 
Barakku [TotalFark] 2008-09-28 03:30:04 PM  
HaywoodJablonski: 1) The skit blames a virus, not a mosquito
2) Was the tiger 11 foot long with razor sharp teeth?


pelicanman: "Mr Huckvale had his leg amputated when he was 29 after a benign tumour was removed.'

Somehow that doesn't sound too "benign".

Benign just means it wasn't going to kill him, it may have still ruined his leg

 
TheGreatZarquon 2008-09-28 03:31:43 PM  
So this man walks out of a bar...

 
DosMas 2008-09-28 03:40:48 PM  
xria: Only in Kenya?

Forget Norway.

 
hitler was a hardcore liberal 2008-09-28 03:43:41 PM  
DosMas:
Forget Norway.


done and done.

 
simian04 2008-09-28 03:49:22 PM  
Miss Smartass: simian04: Miss Smartass: Bionic?
Sweet. Soon we can all be like her:

She's my idol!

I swoon!

/swoon, swoon

At me or Motoko?


At Motoko for being there and at you for posting. Hence the '/swoon, swoon'

 
Befuddled 2008-09-28 03:52:48 PM  
FTA: Mr Huckvale had his leg amputated when he was 29 after a benign tumour was removed.

A tumor that causes you to lose a leg doesn't sound all that benign to me.

 
Miss Smartass 2008-09-28 04:22:09 PM  
simian04: Miss Smartass: simian04: Miss Smartass: Bionic?
Sweet. Soon we can all be like her:

She's my idol!

I swoon!

/swoon, swoon

At me or Motoko?

At Motoko for being there and at you for posting. Hence the '/swoon, swoon'


=]
I feel special now.

 
wydok 2008-09-28 04:46:41 PM  
So the mosquito/tiger thing a Monty Python reference?

 
gutter_ca/fl 2008-09-28 05:29:35 PM  
+infinity to this guy!

I have a non-bionic $15k lower leg, so I'm gettinga kick...

 
Gyrfalcon [TotalFark] 2008-09-28 06:27:37 PM  
Could have been a TIGER MOSQUITO:

www.greenpacks.org

 
Ikahoshi 2008-09-28 06:49:33 PM  
Gyrfalcon: Could have been a TIGER MOSQUITO:

Doesn't look 11 feet long to me.

 
simian04 2008-09-28 06:59:56 PM  
Miss Smartass: simian04: Miss Smartass: simian04: Miss Smartass: Bionic?
Sweet. Soon we can all be like her:

She's my idol!

I swoon!

/swoon, swoon

At me or Motoko?

At Motoko for being there and at you for posting. Hence the '/swoon, swoon'

=]
I feel special now.


Mission accomplished. My work is done here. :)

 
Beatles1964t 2008-09-28 07:34:08 PM  
He'll be better Doc, as soon as he is able.

 
cornponebread [TotalFark] 2008-09-28 07:45:11 PM  
Doesn't get any better than this. Free legs!

 
Fluid 2008-09-28 08:44:42 PM  
That is nigh incomprehensible. How does someone have a spare bionic leg lying around AND is willing to give it away for free?

/awesome story

 
LonghornRob 2008-09-29 03:22:26 AM  
So, wait. He just, gave the guy the $40,000 leg for free? He didn't get sex out of it or anything? He just gave the guy the leg? That kind of generosity still happens? I'm confused?

 
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