Don't be hatin' on the cribbage, subby. I'll muggins yo' ass on that missed nobs.

And "Condo Cowboys" with access to Viagra.

I think the subby meant bingo and bridge.

Cribbage is actually played by people under 70.

What is this? Old fart day on Fark?

One of the more ... ummm ... 'interesting' aspects of life is dealing with aging parents and retirement, nursing, assisted-living homes and such like. (Somebody needs to start a thread on how much this sort of crap costs...)

I've been to some of these places. The last one was all in a tizzy because they had just unboxed the new Wii and everyone was trying it out. Pretty impressive actually.

"It's a RETIREMENT COMMUNITY!"

NYC bought Wii's for all their community centers.

The old people love the bowling, and the wait is up to 2 days to get a game.

I saw some magazine lying around at work that had an article entitled "Wii-habilitaion".

With many older relatives in my area I've been to several "community" developments -- I want to live there!! Some of those houses are bigger then mine and I have 2 children. One even has a golf course with a restaurant you can walk to on a nice evening.

They should enjoy it while it lasts. When the huge wave of "I spent all my money already, didn't save for retirement and actually I'm in debt, so where's my free gubment money?" start showing up, I hope they get packed into deserted hotels.

/Generation Y
//Has Boomer parents that saved, were prudent
///First the war, then the bailout? Nucking Futs I tell you. Do not pass go...

damageddude: With many older relatives in my area I've been to several "community" developments -- I want to live there!! Some of those houses are bigger then mine and I have 2 children. One even has a golf course with a restaurant you can walk to on a nice evening.

Screw that. You can hit 18 here for $2-3 and hire your own (unshared) housekeeper and nurse for $120/month each in Kathmandu. Export thineself. It's like this in much of south/south-east Asia.

/Just a thought.
//Me, I miss the snow.
///Retiring where the bandwidth flows like water and the snow don't stop.

Fifteen two fifteen four fifteen six a pair is eight and eight is sixteen.

I know someone who moved into one of these at age 70. He's probably the youngest guy in there, everyone else is 80+. It's a multi level place with individual apartments for those who don't need help and monitored units for those who need more intensive care. A few restaurants and lots of activities. Not cheap, either but the people there seem to love it.

I was shy too. was that not enough?

sp0rk_of_psychosis Quote 2008-09-28 09:12:36 AM
They should enjoy it while it lasts. When the huge wave of "I spent all my money already, didn't save for retirement and actually I'm in debt, so where's my free gubment money?" start showing up, I hope they get packed into deserted hotels.

/Generation Y
//Has Boomer parents that saved, were prudent
///First the war, then the bailout? Nucking Futs I tell you. Do not pass go...
FUNNY I THOUGHT ALL THE WOMEN KICK US IN THE BALLS AND STOLE OUR MONEY. I DON@T RECIEVE THAT DIDN@T SAVE UP> MAD>>>HUH

Don't laugh, you young whippersnapper farkers. That is going to be YOU sooner than you think.

Lawn. Mine. Remove yourself from it.

I thought it was all. I was spending MY money before I could produce it.....?HOW?.....speak sense now youngun

I saved MY money for ten years by staying in school, now i got some I worry so much, i end up investing and worrying if i have made some future for myself or not

Soylent Grey is made of old people

old people stink...seriously go smell one and you'll see what im talking about...

I work as front desk security at a retirement community on week ends, so I'm getting a kick out of this thread.

No, really. I'm at work right now as I type this. In fact I just signed out two Wii controllers to a member five minutes ago. We have tournements al lot. It is also great incentive to get grandkids out to visit.

So, today the noon meal in the dining room is a Sunday brunch--egg souffle, bacon, sausage, hash browns and french toast. During brunch, I will be passing out at least half a dozen or so golf passes to members for one of the local golf courses for Monday and Tuesday. We've got a lot of very active members, several in their eighties hitting the links twice a week. Our commnity also consistantly wins the city wide pool tournament.

Point is, retirement communities today are way different than what one would see thirty years ago.

I second the motion to strike cribbage from the roster of dissed activities.

When I was 14, I got my ankle crushed in a farming accident. Full recovery would take more than four years - and I run marathons now - but for the first six months, life was hell. For part of that, I was at my grandmother's house and she taught me how to play cribbage. And she didn't go easy on me, either.

I haven't played often since then, but I wash the floor with my opponent's tears every time.

"Cribbage. It beats solitaire."®

Why would anyone want a mock cocktail?

Cribbage sucks. The best thing about hanging around with the elderly is that they take bridge very seriously. I can't find people my age that do that.

dletter: I think the subby meant bingo and bridge.

Cribbage is actually played by people under 70.

Bridge is played by a lot of people under 70. I used to work at ACBL tournaments as a kid.

Scary, scary people.


I plan to spend my retirement doing all the things I don't have time for now, like sailing, Wii and heroin.

bronyaur1: Don't laugh, you young whippersnapper farkers. That is going to be YOU sooner than you think.

Lawn. Mine. Remove yourself from it.

Yeah, in the Amazing Year 2050.

Aulus: I work as front desk security at a retirement community on week ends, so I'm getting a kick out of this thread.

No, really. I'm at work right now as I type this. In fact I just signed out two Wii controllers to a member five minutes ago. We have tournements al lot. It is also great incentive to get grandkids out to visit.

So, today the noon meal in the dining room is a Sunday brunch--egg souffle, bacon, sausage, hash browns and french toast. During brunch, I will be passing out at least half a dozen or so golf passes to members for one of the local golf courses for Monday and Tuesday. We've got a lot of very active members, several in their eighties hitting the links twice a week. Our commnity also consistantly wins the city wide pool tournament.

Point is, retirement communities today are way different than what one would see thirty years ago.

Are you still oversalting their food, locking them in their rooms and stealing their social securty checks?

Used to work in a retirement home.

The dietary staff got no respect no matter HOW hard they worked.

The bingo games got so nasty that they had to be temporarily canceled.

The administrator only got that position because she was the secretary of the previous admin (with everything that implies).

Do NOT work in a retirement home if you can possibly avoid it.

I spend my weekends in an "assisted living" place where my father is. There was a general revolt when they tried to evict him because the smells from his place were so much better than the cafeteria food they served. I ended up (and still do) cater sundays to a revolving crew based on nurses' reccomendations. My mother was the "guest of honor" at Julia Child's first TV show in Boston, so you know how I was brought up to cook. As opposed to the future ex who thinks McDonalds every day is great.

Why is his surprising? When people are old, they do what they did when they were younger, be it chess or video games.

Just because someone gets old, they don't "graduate" to bingo if they don't like it already.

Wii's and other video games should be in ALL centers, because it encourages the increased used of both brain neurons and it really helps with hand/eye coordination.

The Wii does have the advantage of the type of games as well as the motion sensor.

Scary thought... when the generation BEHIND them get in it there will be FPS tournaments and if you think the volume gets loud at the normal ones wait till you get a bunch of gamers that are hard of hearing (you will hear it OUTSIDE the place)

ssrat: Scary thought... when the generation BEHIND them get in it there will be FPS tournaments and if you think the volume gets loud at the normal ones wait till you get a bunch of gamers that are hard of hearing (you will hear it OUTSIDE the place)

Hearing an 80 year old call someone 'shiatcock' while they power down the Bawls and play Team Fortress 14 VR is going to be hilarious.

I bet the McCain meetings must be really exciting.

I worked at an "assisted living facility" for about eight months (yes, it had one nursing home wing), and I can say this is more or less true. While I was there, I saw exercise, bingo, innumerable crafts, more card games then I can name, organized shopping trips, popcorn days, trivia, volleyball, musical performances, and god knows what else I'm not remembering. They got out of their way to keep the old farts occupied.

I actually spent several weeks nagging the activities group to get a Wii. When I first mentioned this, the last in charge had no idea what I was talking about, but the assistants did (they'd read about Wiis being used for therapy). Last I heard corporate supposedly had ordered a few to be kept in a safe when not in use, but as far as I know, they haven't arrived yet. I'm sure hilarity will ensue as none of the activities ladies know how to play video games.

McCain will fit right in.

Nintendo's targeting that demographic alright... no wonder it's getting garbage games.

/stick with my PS3
//fark nintendo

I'll add my voice to those who have already said it: I play cribbage, and I am not 70. I'm 36. (I usually play my dad...who is 68..and occasionally me sister, who is 40.)

now get off my lawn...

Cribbage rocks. So does Dominoes, if you know how to play it.

The Great Mancini, a stage hypnotist, is doing a performance at the local senior center. He says "Most hypnotists call a few people on stage for their act, but I'm going to hypnotize the entire auditorium." He pulls a pocket watch out of his pocket and says "This watch has been in my family for six generations. It's priceless. Now I want you all to watch the watch. Watch the watch. Watch the watch..." Suddenly he drops the watch and it smashes into a million pieces. The Great Mancini says "shiat."

It took three days to clean the place up.

If euphemisms are the worst shenanigans Boomers get up to, count yourself very lucky... but before it's all said and done, I think we'll see legislation passed that seizes ownership of and a right to reside in 1/3rd of the square footage of their children's primary residence and mandates X hours of care a day from all adults in the household or garnishes their income to pay for home nursing.


WORST GENERATION EVER!!! plague of farking locusts... Even Nazi-era Germans look at them like WTF???