That's when they go live with their boyfriend. He is now my favorite person in the world.

This person is a douche. If a man cheats, it's his wife's fault for not making him feel more "appreciated"?

Some?

/try again

I was familar with Professor Will Smith's dissertation on the lack of understanding from parents, but this study had eluded me.

GaryPDX: Some?

/try again

Juts because you and it seems most guys around here have bad taste in women doesn't mean everyone does.

Chariset: This person is a douche. If a man cheats, it's his wife's fault for not making him feel more "appreciated"?

There's nothing douchey about what he says. He's drawing conclusions based on his studies. He also says this, "There is clearly no blame on the woman if he's cheated. She's not responsible for stopping him."

Is this where I talk about how marriage is an out-of-date concept that is destined to leave people either miserable or totally complacent?

Is it cheating if she wants to sleep with both you and your wife?

vincentpriceisdead: Is this where I talk about how marriage is an out-of-date concept that is destined to leave people either miserable or totally complacent?

I would amend your debating point slightly saying that marriage can work if people or society made the concepts less out of date, more focused on love and less on stuff (or even gender.) However, it's not important because you knitted a Katamari prince.

vincentpriceisdead: Is this where I talk about how marriage is an out-of-date concept that is destined to leave people either miserable or totally complacent?


I've been happily married for 6 years so here's my ideas for having a happy marriage:

1. Never spend more $100 without talking about it first. Actaully respect the other person's opinion about spending it.

2. Have sex at least once a week. You'd be surprised how much happier everyone is.

3. Let him have one day a weekend where he can watch sports all day on the good TV.

4. Separate computers.

5. Make a list of what you want done for the weekend household chore wise. Split it up and let everyone do it on their own time tables as long as it gets done.

6. Don't shove all the house cleaning off to one person. Share it equally and include kids that are old enough.

7. Give everyone an hour after they get home before saying anything negative. No one wants to associate coming home with biatching.

Gwendolyn: GaryPDX: Some?

/try again

Juts because you and it seems most guys around here have bad taste in women doesn't mean everyone does.

I don't have bad taste in women. I just have a finely tuned bullshiat detector. The dating social scene is different in this century. It's not about who someone is, it's about what can be obtained. And when it gets a little boring sometimes, it's time to move on for most. That's not just women either, it's just the way society is these days.

Gwendolyn: vincentpriceisdead: Is this where I talk about how marriage is an out-of-date concept that is destined to leave people either miserable or totally complacent?


I've been happily married for 6 years so here's my ideas for having a happy marriage:

1. Never spend more $100 without talking about it first. Actaully respect the other person's opinion about spending it.

2. Have sex at least once a week. You'd be surprised how much happier everyone is.

3. Let him have one day a weekend where he can watch sports all day on the good TV.

4. Separate computers.

5. Make a list of what you want done for the weekend household chore wise. Split it up and let everyone do it on their own time tables as long as it gets done.

6. Don't shove all the house cleaning off to one person. Share it equally and include kids that are old enough.

7. Give everyone an hour after they get home before saying anything negative. No one wants to associate coming home with biatching.

While you and I have very different opinions on Presidential politics, I want to give you props for this post - nicely done.

/Very happily married for 24 years.

Gwendolyn: I've been happily married for 6 years so here's my ideas for having a happy marriage:

1. Never spend more $100 without talking about it first. Actaully respect the other person's opinion about spending it.

2. Have sex at least once a week. You'd be surprised how much happier everyone is.

3. Let him have one day a weekend where he can watch sports all day on the good TV.

4. Separate computers.

5. Make a list of what you want done for the weekend household chore wise. Split it up and let everyone do it on their own time tables as long as it gets done.

6. Don't shove all the house cleaning off to one person. Share it equally and include kids that are old enough.

7. Give everyone an hour after they get home before saying anything negative. No one wants to associate coming home with biatching.

I am intruiged by your ideas and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

Gwendolyn: I've been happily married for 6 years so here's my ideas for having a happy marriage:

You have derailed this thread by posting sensible views that can be largely endorsed by most participants.

This is contrary to the spirit of Fark. What did you think you were doing?

Women be different from men!

WOMEN BE SHOPPIN'!

Men be actin' like zombies up in the mall!

A hummer a day will keep him from going astray.

/something like that.

My wife and I have built a strong marriage upon a solid foundation of routine.

Gwendolyn:

Yes, that's not very hard. Look, a man will do anything for a woman. We love the attention, acknowledgement and sex.

The late Paul Newman said "why get a hamburger when you have a steak at home" in an interview with Playboy. I read it cause he croaked and it was in his obit. But that's besides the point, the point is ladies need to be the best cut of meat and then your man won't cheat.

Isn't it more likely for a married woman to cheat? Or I am just batshiat crazy?

I'm always horrified by the idea that people don't have to be nice to their spouses. It's more important to be nice and polite and considerate of your spouse (&family) than other people (it's still important though).

My grandfather always said that the most important words in a marriage are "Please" and "Thank you." He and my grandma were together for 50+ years and now he's married to my wonderful StepGrandma.

/as long as we're having a serious and sensible discussion.

Gwendolyn: vincentpriceisdead: Is this where I talk about how marriage is an out-of-date concept that is destined to leave people either miserable or totally complacent?


I've been happily married for 6 years so here's my ideas for having a happy marriage:

1. Never spend more $100 without talking about it first. Actaully respect the other person's opinion about spending it.

2. Have sex at least once a week. You'd be surprised how much happier everyone is.

3. Let him have one day a weekend where he can watch sports all day on the good TV.

4. Separate computers.

5. Make a list of what you want done for the weekend household chore wise. Split it up and let everyone do it on their own time tables as long as it gets done.

6. Don't shove all the house cleaning off to one person. Share it equally and include kids that are old enough.

7. Give everyone an hour after they get home before saying anything negative. No one wants to associate coming home with biatching.


Ahhh, that seven year itch is just around the corner.

Gwendolyn: vincentpriceisdead: Is this where I talk about how marriage is an out-of-date concept that is destined to leave people either miserable or totally complacent?


I've been happily married for 6 years so here's my ideas for having a happy marriage:

1. Never spend more $100 without talking about it first. Actaully respect the other person's opinion about spending it.

2. Have sex at least oncethree times a week. You'd be surprised how much happier everyone is.

3. Let him have one day a weekend where he can watch sports all day on the good TV.

4. Separate computers.

5. Make a list of what you want done for the weekend household chore wise. Split it up and let everyone do it on their own time tables as long as it gets done.

6. Don't shove all the house cleaning off to one person. Share it equally and include kids that are old enough.

7. Give everyone an hour after they get home before saying anything negative. No one wants to associate coming home with biatching.


Fixed it for you.

/13 years.

Why do men cheat on you? You're not giving them enough blowjobs.

If every time he goes to do something for you or the family, you start complaining that he's not doing it right, then you're the problem.

Smellvin: Why do men cheat on you? You're not giving them enough blowjobs.

THIS

vincentpriceisdead: Is this where I talk about how marriage is an out-of-date concept that is destined to leave people either miserable or totally complacent?

It's not so much out of date as over-regulated. The horror isn't so much the marriage, but the getting into and out of it that's the problem. There's a puritanical idea that it should be as painful as possible to discourage people from ending it, as though the divorce rate reflected badly on politicians or something.

Weak men cheat....but when they DO cheat, they do it for sex for the "thrill of the catch" that they no longer get from being in a marriage.

/cheater

You work all day, for some old man,
Sweat and break your back,
Then you go home to your castle,
But your queen won't cut you slack.

That's why you're losin' all your hair,
That's why you're overweight,
That's why you flipped your pickup truck
Right off the interstate.

There's a lot of bull they hand you,
There's nothin' you can do,
Your wife don't understand you, but I do,
I said your wife don't understand you, but I do!

But I thought PARENTS just don't understand!

My first greenlight! I have something in my eye...

Look, if you cheat on your wife its your fault. If your wife cheats on you its your fault. Obviously men are to blame for all cheating.

/bitter divorcee

This study is utter crap.

If you cheat, you're selfish. Probably dishonest, too, if you lie about it. There isn't anything anyone can DO to stop you, all this guy is talking about is making yourself attractive enough to minimize his choices outside the relationship.

Imagine you're a guy with a problem with overeating. So your wife starts cooking really good, but healthy, meals at home. This is great, you'll enjoy eating healthy. But you're still probably gonna get a craving for that fatty, greasy burger awesomeness, and sneak in some junk food where you can. Because the underlying problem hasn't been solved.

In this case, the underlying problem is that the man in question is a dishonest selfish asshole. Being nice to him won't make him suddenly abandon his selfish dishonest asshole ways.

My ex-wife was an abusive hag, and I finally divorced her. Even though she was miserable to me, I magically never cheated on her, because I'm not an asshole. Unfortunately, she was.

Why men cheat:




VS.

ChaoticLimbs: 7. Give everyone an hour after they get home before saying anything negative. No one wants to associate coming home with biatching.

There's a "quick! get me a beer before it starts!" joke related to this.

Gwendolyn:


I've been happily married for 6 years so here's my ideas for having a happy marriage:

1. Never spend more $100 without talking about it first. Actaully respect the other person's opinion about spending it.

2. Have sex at least once a week. You'd be surprised how much happier everyone is.

3. Let him have one day a weekend where he can watch sports all day on the good TV.

4. Separate computers.

5. Make a list of what you want done for the weekend household chore wise. Split it up and let everyone do it on their own time tables as long as it gets done.

6. Don't shove all the house cleaning off to one person. Share it equally and include kids that are old enough.

7. Give everyone an hour after they get home before saying anything negative. No one wants to associate coming home with biatching.

My ex was guilty of breaking rules 1, 5, and 6. It's hard to follow those rules yourself when your spouse thinks cleaning up after him is your job. I felt more like his maid/servant than his wife.

He's the one who cheated, though, not me.

Oh, and:

So...why do women cheat? To get back at men?

I think [marital problems] have gotten significantly worst because of technology.

I blame spell-checkers.

/22 years, talking down to me about marriage makes you look stupid

Gwendolyn: vincentpriceisdead: Is this where I talk about how marriage is an out-of-date concept that is destined to leave people either miserable or totally complacent?


I've been happily married for 6 years so here's my ideas for having a happy marriage:

1. Love is not about money. If you don't love your SO, don't marry. If you do, don't care about money.

2. Have good sex every day, twice.

3. Have your own life, and let your SO have yours, and only then you'll be able to have one together. You can share your life and still have time on your own.

4. Only have one computer. Throw the TV out the window.

5. Being happy and enjoying life together is more important than a clean house. Try to get things done together.

6. Each Do what you like, and pay someone to do what nobody wants to do.

7. Love means what you feel is above what happens daily. You Don't need to biatch about anything. If you do things right, there are no negative things to say, ever. Otherwise, you are doing it wrong.

8. And the universal rule of life: Passion, Fun and Drugs. Anything is better when It's done with passion, while having fun, and amazingly high.

Always worked for me.

FTFY

Forgive me for being naive, but, I think that growing an actual friendship with your wife makes the biggest difference. If you and your mate are NOT good friends, then there is little incentive for your mate to protect your relationship.


Props to Gwendolyn as well, I actually enjoy my wife's company.
Even though she biatches about me watching sports, no grudges are ever held.

Pffft. Like this guy gathered 100 faithful guys. Hah!

"Hey, here's $200 to be in a study. Have you ever cheated on your wife?"

"Hell no!"

*uses money to get a hotel room to bone my mistress*

I find it interesting that the study's author notes that most men cheat for emotional reasons, much like women do, and that he blames the cheater for their behavior. When these kinds of studies are published about women cheating, the author often blames the partner who got cheated on.

It's actually about sex. Get real.

Also, side note; it irks me when people who've been happily married give advice on how to stay happily married. For one, you have no idea if your advice works, because you've never done it differently to see if it screws things up. For two, your marriage is still going, but that doesn't say it'll go on forever. I've known people who seemed blissfully happy for 30 years who got divorced when one of them turned into an asshole.

You want advice on how to make a relationship work, look at the guy who's been divorced twice and is now in a stable relationship. He's had to figure out what went wrong, to fix it.

People who are happily married giving relationship advice is like people who've never had car trouble and never popped the hood on their car giving mechanical advice to someone who's broken down. Just because your car hasn't broken down, that doesn't mean you have any idea about why it hasn't.

IMO, choose wisely. Not with your heart, not with your head, not with your biological desires. Choose wisely in all categories and you'll never need worry. If you can't make a wise choice for marriage from all consideration points: don't get married.

Women always ask what makes a guy cheat...other chicks! OH!

Around my wife I find it pays not to be sexist. Broads hate that.

i divorced my wife because she was a total coont.

still single...any one want a date?

Smellvin: Why do men cheat on you? You're not giving them enough blowjobs.

So. Not. True.

I'm in the demographic of women who do not mind, hell even like to perform oral secks on a guy. My boyfriend has been cheating on me for 6 months now.