Thank you, Ric Romero. This one's at least 20 years old.

Or space herpes.

"I had a mom drag her child into my office on the first day of school," said Jill Burgin, a registered nurse at Stiles Point Elementary in Charleston. "She had been battling it throughout the summer and wanted advice on where to go from there."

Away from the school?

Hey now! I don't like the insinuation of that headline.

AtomicAcidbath: Hey now! I don't like the insinuation of that headline.

Me neither.

Gaargh... crab battle...

How about pubic spiders??



They spread like wildfire (NSFW)

le mew: Thank you, Ric Romero. This one's at least 20 years old.

Yeah, but 20 years ago we called 'em saber-toothed crotch crickets. Oh, you meant the lice?

I recommend shaving her head then dipping her upside down into a vat of bromine.

I have "super lice" stuck in my head to the same tune as "spider pig."

/ I know, weird.

Is that like Super Aids?

That's nothing. Wait till they hear about zombie hemorrhoids. (Every time you think you killed them, they rise from the grave once again.)

Oh wait some of those soccer moms probably have 'em already.

shave head, scrub with gasoline. problem solved

We always called them "Cooties".

Atomic Crabs you say?

Lice aren't actually attracted to "dirty, scrungy kids". They actually don't give a rat's ass what kind of hair they're living in...clean, dirty...doesn't matter.

/Shampoo is better
//No conditioner is better

///Stop looking at me swan!

ultraholland: Link

Good lord. I could have done without that.

ultraholland: They spread like wildfire (NSFW)


Er....um......*BARF!*

For the love of God I hope that's photoshopped.

Nuke the child from orbit, it's the only way to be sure.

Drys out the little varmints carapace, causes them to crack and well, die. Does the same to the eggs. The kid may dry out a bit to, but they recover.

Are there really super lice or just a lot of lazy parents? My daughter got a case in 2nd grade and it took a while to get rid of them. The trick is to eradicate them through two to three generations. Treat the hair once and wash all the bedding at the same time. Meanwhile dump all the stuffed animals in a plastic bag in the attic for 2 months or so. Wait ten or so days and treat the hair and wash the bedding again to kill the newly hatched 2nd generation. Repeat once or twice more for successive generations. Sooner or later you'll get a generation of adult lice that hasn't laid eggs yet. Kill them off and you're home free.

One poor little kid in my class had them 8 times last year. And contrary to popular belief--lice actually prefer clean hair to dirty hair. Apparently it makes it easier for them to attach their egg sacs.

Or so they tell us.

At any rate, the victim in my classroom was a very clean child.

Shave head, no gasoline rub required.

All i know is that scabies suck.

Yeah, I had lice like, in the third grade. Due to the no-nit policy, I was out for over half the school year.

I was an extremely clean child.

My mother was just stupid and didn't realize my sister and I were passing them back and forth.

Smeggy Smurf
shave head, scrub with gasoline. problem solved

aside from the fact that's been known to kill infants..., and I don't think brain damage is a good alternative either.

jeffwashingdc: Smeggy Smurf
shave head, scrub with gasoline. problem solved

aside from the fact that's been known to kill infants..., and I don't think brain damage is a good alternative either.

fark 'em. Ain't my kids.

I think the only solution is to introduce into the child's hair a species that will compete with the superlice for their food source, ultimately driving them to extinction.

freelance layabout: ultraholland: Link Good lord. I could have done without that.

That made me go back and look. Yikes! Bad ultraholland, bad! Words...they fail me.

The 1st time my kids got lice, I found "paper lice" online for them to dress up. We made a game of it. It was no longer amusing 6 months later. Finally I just slathered everybody's heads in mayonnaise, put shower caps on, and we all went to bed. That took care of it! No more lice!

Dip em in tobacco juice.

crystalofeight: The 1st time my kids got lice, I found "paper lice" online for them to dress up. We made a game of it. It was no longer amusing 6 months later. Finally I just slathered everybody's heads in mayonnaise, put shower caps on, and we all went to bed. That took care of it! No more lice!

I guess lice prefer ketchup with their scabby snacks.

Under that scenario, too many children missed too much school, losing valuable learning time causing the school to lose out on funds.

There we go.

Atomic crabs? Ah, just hit 'em wit' da shampoo!



"Yeah, I'm hotlinked, Check me and see!
Just like my johnson When I go take a pee!"

Thanks subby!

Now my scalp won't stop itching.
Frikin' don't go home from work for 5 hours.

despite claims to the contrary by the manufacturers, noted Shirley C. Gordon, an associate professor at Florida Atlantic University who studies persistent head lice.

Health officials have continued to recommend the products, however, because over-the-counter medications like the

what a job

Parents wary? AND WELL THEY SHOULD BE!!!!

CITIZEN SNIIIIPSSS!!!

GCD: Lice aren't actually attracted to "dirty, scrungy kids". They actually don't give a rat's ass what kind of hair they're living in...clean, dirty...doesn't matter.

/Shampoo is better
//No conditioner is better

///Stop looking at me swan!

I've actually been told that lice are more likely to thrive on clean kids since it's easier to hold onto clean hair than it is for them to hold onto a strand of greasy hair.

Either way, I don't want to be part of the testing group that proves or disproves that theory.

Don't forget about Super-AIDS.

steve_wmn: Are there really super lice or just a lot of lazy parents? My daughter got a case in 2nd grade and it took a while to get rid of them. The trick is to eradicate them through two to three generations. Treat the hair once and wash all the bedding at the same time. Meanwhile dump all the stuffed animals in a plastic bag in the attic for 2 months or so. Wait ten or so days and treat the hair and wash the bedding again to kill the newly hatched 2nd generation. Repeat once or twice more for successive generations. Sooner or later you'll get a generation of adult lice that hasn't laid eggs yet. Kill them off and you're home free.

2 months? No, eggs hatch in 8-10 days at 70F or above. 50-68F they might take a month though (other sources suggest they won't hatch at all after days below 70F). But once they hatch they'll die in an hour if they don't get a blood meal. And they can't move much at all. So any out-of-the-way place will do.

Actually people kinda wonder how they get transmitted so well in the first place, given that they can't jump or survive for long outside a scalp and attach their nits to hair so they don't scatter. Sort of a mystery there.

During the Korean war lice were rampant!! Our solution was a wipe down with a gasoline soaked rag. It was sometimes a little tough on your junk but it killed them. Trouble was they came back and you had to repeat!! War is all fun & games until someone gets lice!!

Oznog:
Actually people kinda wonder how they get transmitted so well in the first place, given that they can't jump or survive for long outside a scalp and attach their nits to hair so they don't scatter. Sort of a mystery there.

I was always told one way was with kids sharing hats, girls borrowing brushes for their hair, things like that. And beyond RID, isn't half a bottle of rubbing alcohol useful? Or is that a crap story?

/waiting for the chiggers thread so we can have a bug trifecta in play.
//has had neigther. Spider bites however.....

I see a marketing opportunity for "Lice Kryptonite".

Dip them in bacon.

As mentioned many times, shaving their heads works every time.

Don't like it? Don't care.

My son's 1st grade got up to a 12/24 infestation. Needless to say,we learned a lot about eradicating these farkers. The first and best line of defense is to apply some conditioner and then comb them out very very thoroughly with a very fine toothed comb. And that means everyone in the family!

Secondly, wash the pillow cases and sheets every day. Put favorite stuffed animals and etc. into a plastic bag for a couple days, preferably in the freezer.

My kid managed to get lice on three occasions, each time a couple of years apart. No pesticides (lice shampoo) on my kid! All we used was a Licemeister comb (hair got a good conditioning first) and that always got rid of them within a week.

We washed sheets/pillow cases but never bagged her stuffed animals. The eggs tend to be glued quite well on the hair, so as long as all loose hair was vacuumed up we were good.