Your buttcheeks is warm.

That headline makes my brain hurt.

FTA: "It seems the guy ran out of the house wearing only a T-shirt, boxer shorts and socks, leaving behind his wallet with his ID,' Burrimond said.

If he had only boxer shorts on, where was he keeping the wallet?

Oh, wait, never mind...

was alcohol involved?

Looks like he got a little curried away.

Did the submitter take two sentences mix them, add a few words then post... doesn't make sense to me.

that headline is whargarbl

Jeebus Farking Christ.
Article is funnier than the headline.

/Can't stop laughing

Whacking?... In a man's face?

SNAUSAGES?!?!?

Is he single?

/want to spice things up in the bedroom.

I'm trying to concoct a scenario where its a reasonable act after burgling someone's house to take off your pants, then to season first one inhabitant and strike the other with a sausage

/I'm also having a difficult time typing this between bouts of giggling

WalkingCarpet: That headline makes my brain hurt.
Glad it's not just me. Sentence structure and verb tense can be your friend.

Subby, lay off the Jaegermiester.

English ...do you speak it?

Weiner thread!


/Did this happen in Korea by chance? dnrtfa

Links: Weiner thread!


/Did this happen in Korea by chance? dnrtfa


seriously, rtfa, its worth it

TheMadDefenestrator: Links: Weiner thread!


/Did this happen in Korea by chance? dnrtfa


seriously, rtfa, its worth it

I did. Was not disappointed.

Burrimond said the money was recovered, but that the piece of sausage used in the attack was discarded by the suspect and eaten by a dog.

"That's right, the dog ate the weapon,' Burrimond said.

"I tell you, this was one weird case.'

Erm... a dog ate a sausage. Not weird. Least weird part about the whole thing.

fark I hate cops.

Dear Subby,

"ENGLISH, MOTHERfarkER! DO YOU SPEAK IT?"

I whacked my sausage on my wife'e face after cooking a spicy dish for us last night, so I'm getting a kick out of these replies.

I hope to god there is a follow up article to this, I am morbidly curious as to WHY he was RUBBING SPICES on the victims. SERIOUSLY, wtf? Where is a wtf picture when you really need one?

Wow, a thread where OMGWTFBBQ is appropriate.

/Dry rubs are the only way to go.

DNRTFA: Heheh, 8-inch sausage.

DRTFA: Rubbed what and did what with a 8-inch sausage?

Clearly my mind is in the gutter and I'm thinking about 8-inch sausages now.

/In bunk, brb

Obligated to post this as a Farker, a Frank Zappa fan, and a native Illinoisan. (^)

in the tone of bearded.... "the devil, he farted..

Dr_Gats: I am morbidly curious as to WHY he was RUBBING SPICES on the victims.

That would be hard to explain at work. "I'm sorry boss, but I can't come in today, I have to talk to the police." "What happened?" "I was rubbed with spices and my roommate was slapped in the face with an eight inch sausage." "Oh... well... carry on then."

Praetorius: Whacking?... In a man's face?

it's more common than you think....

johnny_vegas: Praetorius: Whacking?... In a man's face?

it's more common than you think....

Oh, fark you. I came in here to be clever, but...just fark you.

I know a few have already pointed this out, but...

...YOU CAN TO TALK THE ENGLISH BESTEST THERE SUBBY!

What kind of drugs were the victims on? To sleep through a ransacking of your house, and to sleep while someone is rubbing you with spices, well, they must have been really, really drunk or on ludes.

A BURGLAR who broke into a home just east of Fresno rubbed spices over the body of one of two men as they slept in their rooms...

Glad TFA pointed out the guys were sleeping in separate rooms, so no gay stuff was going on, in spite of the sausage.

I wonder what part of the body the spices were being applied to? This story has to be followed up and a made for TV movie produced.

This sentence no verb.

At first I was "huh?", then "the victims, both farmworkers".

what ever gets your rocks off.

"Looks like he got a little curried away."

He had it cumin.

The victims, both farmworkers, told deputies they were awakened by a stranger applying spices to one of the them and striking the other with a sausage.

Ok, so, apparently these guys were sleeping close enough together that this intruder could sausage-slap one of them with one hand, and apply just a dash of arrowroot to the other.

Man, that is gayer than the day is long.

SpaceLord: The victims, both farmworkers, told deputies they were awakened by a stranger applying spices to one of the them and striking the other with a sausage.

Ok, so, apparently these guys were sleeping close enough together that this intruder could sausage-slap one of them with one hand, and apply just a dash of arrowroot to the other.

Man, that is gayer than the day is long.


you are so missing the point here, it doesn't matter if they're gay, straight, or can only get off with the help of sea cucumbers, someone broke into their home and sprinkled one with mrs. dash and dashed the other with a sausage

that's got to be a result of some lifestyle choice far more abnormal than sexual preference

Subby, you forgot PENIS

FTA: Deputies, he said, had no problem linking the suspect to the crime.

They made a funnay.

Dr_Gats: I hope to god there is a follow up article to this, I am morbidly curious as to WHY he was RUBBING SPICES on the victims. SERIOUSLY, wtf? Where is a wtf picture when you really need one?

Use your imagination....

/sausage. pants. stuff.

/whacked

This is probably one of the worst greenlit headlines I've read on Fark.

Kurmudgeon: "Looks like he got a little curried away."

He had it cumin.

If convicted, will the suspect will do thyme?

I'm whacking my 8" sausage right now, so I'm getting a kick...

Sounds like a guy who has always dreamed of being on Fark. Wow, the article is much funnier than the headline, but the headline cracked me up, sentence structure and all.