Yeah. That joke. It never gets stale. Nope.

Gunga galunga...gunga, gunga-galunga.

Wasn't his name Brian?

Norad: Yeah. That joke. It never gets stale. Nope.

Well, stale or not, can you think of a better time to use it?

"Hey everybody - LET'S GET TOTAL ENLIGHTENMENT!!!!"

I heard he was a big hitter.

When the lama was offered condolences he was quoted as saying, "I'm alright...ain't no one gotta worry bout me."

Big hitter, the Lama.

I blame China.

Seriously, 25 years later and there's still not a better joke about the Dalai Lama? Damn.

His brother Tony?

UberNeuman: "Hey everybody - LET'S GET TOTAL ENLIGHTENMENT!!!!"

I LOL'd.

carmody: Seriously, 25 years later and there's still not a better joke about the Dalai Lama? Damn.

And I say, "Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know."

There's a deli near me named "The Deli Lama". F*cking amazing sandwiches.

Beck Bristow: There's a deli near me named "The Deli Lama". F*cking amazing sandwiches.

The proper pastrami will totally align your chakras, dude.

/Dude'd

Norad: Yeah. That joke. It never gets stale. Nope.

It's a Saturday night, a time when most people are at parties. Why aren't you at one?


/yeah yeah

Total consciousness.

Only if the music playing in the background were permanently set to "Take Ecstasy With Me" or like "The Sunshine Underground" or something. There would be a stipulation of good epic music before I'd be okay with this.

New Dehli, Indiana? Do they proof-read this shiat after they write it?

The Dalai Lama is so full of shiat.

carmody: Seriously, 25 years later and there's still not a better joke about the Dalai Lama? Damn.

The Dalai Lama, visiting New York City for the first time in several years, walked up to a hot dog vendor, handed him a twenty dollar bill, and said, "Make me one with everything."

The vendor pocketed the money, and handed the Lama his hot dog. The Lama, after waiting for a moment, asked for his change. The vendor looked at him and said, "Change comes from within."

/old gag, works equally well if you stop after the first paragraph
//telling it with a rubber chicken in one hand helps, too.

FTFA: While the brothers were close, they held different views about Tibet's future.

The Dalai Lama advocates a "middle path" policy that espouses "meaningful autonomy" for Tibet, rather than the full independence that some activists are seeking.

I'm kind of confused by that phrase. Doesn't that mean full independence? Basically self-government with common sense?

carmody: Seriously, 25 years later and there's still not a better joke about the Dalai Lama? Damn.

Helloooooo, DALAI!

/That better??

Cinderella story. Outta nowhere. A former greenskeeper, now about to become the Masters champion

He'll be back

carmody: Seriously, 25 years later and there's still not a better joke about the Dalai Lama? Damn.

THE Dalai Lama goes up to a hot dog vendor and says make me one with everything.

I know...old joke....but it ain't that old

carmody: Seriously, 25 years later and there's still not a better joke about the Dalai Lama? Damn.

So the Dalai Lama was trying to reinstate a caste system in Tibet while people all over the world decried China's communist regime attempt to control the region, which is funny because writings attributed to Siddhartha Gautama espouse a deep dissatisfaction of such a social structure. Well, anyway, so I says to the Lama...

I've never seen the movie the headline is referencing.

It's referenced eleventy-billion times a week here.

Somehow, I still enjoy it every time. And throw in "which is nice" into my vernacular every now 'n then, too.

/if I wasn't so lazy I'd just go out and rent the damn thing
//now I'm afraid it won't live up to expectations, though...

The Tony Danzas: Norad: Yeah. That joke. It never gets stale. Nope.

Well, stale or not, can you think of a better time to use it?

Well, there was the article about the Dalai Lama getting out of the hospital a few days back.

Wait, they used it then too.

MortalComedy: carmody: Seriously, 25 years later and there's still not a better joke about the Dalai Lama? Damn.

THE Dalai Lama goes up to a hot dog vendor and says make me one with everything.


Y'see?

Loverboy586: He'll be back

Yeah so?

/camps on his respawn point.

Unavailable for comment.

What did the Dalai Lama say to the hot dog vendor?
Make me one with everything.


/here all week, try the veal

/window seat please

Once upon a time I made a Murray tag. It did not get used. I lost it.

Loverboy586: He'll be back

I LOL'd.

scottapeshot: carmody: Seriously, 25 years later and there's still not a better joke about the Dalai Lama? Damn.

The Dalai Lama, visiting New York City for the first time in several years, walked up to a hot dog vendor, handed him a twenty dollar bill, and said, "Make me one with everything."

The vendor pocketed the money, and handed the Lama his hot dog. The Lama, after waiting for a moment, asked for his change. The vendor looked at him and said, "Change comes from within."

The Dalai Lama admitted this was true, and ate his hot dog, but it gave him bad breath and bothered his sore tooth.

The Dalai Lama then walked to the dentist to get a filling. Although old and frail, he walked often, and he walked barefoot, as evidenced by the thickness of the soles of his feet. It is for this reason he is known as the "super-calloused fragile mystic exhibiting halitosis."

The dentist inspected the Dalai Lama's tooth, and said he could fill the cavity right then. When he offered to use Novacaine, the Dalai Lama declined, saying he wanted to "transcend dental medication."

StreetlightInTheGhetto: SNIP

/if I wasn't so lazy I'd just go out and rent the damn thing
//now I'm afraid it won't live up to expectations, though...

See it drunk ... with many friends. You'll be disappointed otherwise

Can't believe that word of this isn't more widespread around Bloomington right now...

/Go Hoosiers

Juniper Jupiter: FTFA: While the brothers were close, they held different views about Tibet's future.

The Dalai Lama advocates a "middle path" policy that espouses "meaningful autonomy" for Tibet, rather than the full independence that some activists are seeking.

I'm kind of confused by that phrase. Doesn't that mean full independence? Basically self-government with common sense?

Could be something like municipal autonomy and religious freedom, but China still maintains the federal and perhaps provincial government.
/ Something along those lines, anyway
// Doesn't really follow the llama or Tibet

The Dalai Lama is a giggling moran. FWIW.

Who doesn't mind lording it up in 5 star hotels and hitting the free buffet.

Brisketeer:
The Dalai Lama then walked to the dentist to get a filling. Although old and frail, he walked often, and he walked barefoot, as evidenced by the thickness of the soles of his feet. It is for this reason he is known as the "super-calloused fragile mystic exhibiting plagued with halitosis."

Some people.

The brother (his real name is Thubten Norbu) had a Tibetan restaurant in Bloomington, Indiana, where he was a professor. His son (the Lama's nephew) now runs the place (Snow Lion.)

If you achieve "total consciousness" when you are dead and unable to move, wouldn't that be hellish for you? You'd know you're rotting away underground or you're probably getting cremated, but you only have consciousness, not mobility.

If you have no physical body, then where does your consciousness go?

Tenzing Norgay > Thubten Norbu.

Shakespeare's Monkey: What did the Dalai Lama say to the hot dog vendor?
Make me one with everything.


This is my 3rd time laughing at this.

Looks like hyaenaville for me.

joegekko: Brisketeer:
The Dalai Lama then walked to the dentist to get a filling. Although old and frail, he walked often, and he walked barefoot, as evidenced by the thickness of the soles of his feet. It is for this reason he is known as the "super-calloused fragile mystic exhibiting plagued with halitosis."

Some people.

"Plagued with" doesn't sound like "expy". What's your game?!?

GreenSun: If you have no physical body, then where does your consciousness go?

The idea is that consciousness is independent from the body. So where does it go? It goes right, then takes a turn left.

Note the the AFP:

The man was not named Rinpoche! Rinpoche is a title given to certain revered Lamas.

Although they do mention his given name was Thupten Jigme Norbu, and that his spiritual name was Taktser, they use the title Rinpoche repeatedly as if it were the man's last name.

How could this article have made it to press with such an obvious and glaring error repeated throughout the article?!?!

You would think that they would send a reporter with at least a some basic knowledge about Tibet or Tibetan Buddhism to cover this story.

/AFP = FAIL

Brisketeer:" ...exhibiting halitosis."
joegekko:" ...plagued with halitosis."

I believe it's "hexed", I even asked google.

helminthes: The Dalai Lama is so full of shiat.

Thanks for that well reasoned, informed addition to the thread.