Nice headline, proper tag, short read. + 1 subby.

Sounds like a bargain.

Or for $20 I'll try to avoid major organs.

That must be a union wage.

For thirty dollars I will stop printing out photos of Drew Curtis and ejaculating on them.

Any takers?

Malinki: That must be a union wage.


You must be from Philly to think like that>

I don't stop stabbing people for less than $40.

I have standards.

So what IS the going rate?

Isn't that what a robbery is?

I'll pay you everything in my wallet... $28... to not shoot me.

I try to get to those negotiations BEFORE the stabbing starts.

The attacker must have slashed his prices.

You know, most people will hand over the money if you only threaten to stab them...

Another $20 and he coulda gotten a rimjob

flyf15

The article describes it as a fight where a knife came out, and the guy pretty much said "No wait this sucks, I'm sorry, here's $30 dollars to stop"

Robbery starts with intent to get money, this guy just saw a good deal and took it.

piaddic120: Another $20 and he coulda gotten a rimjob

How much for one of these?

Yet more testimony to a safer society through gun restrictions- he could have been shot.

Nelson Muntz: "Stop stabbing yourself! Stop stabbing yourself!"

flyf15: Isn't that what a robbery is?

I'll pay you everything in my wallet... $28... to not shoot me.

You're 2 dollars short, dumbass. Bite tha bullet biatch. Eat lead

I usually find that just saying "If you are going to pull that knife on me you better be ready to have some sex," usually works out pretty well.

I would prefer to give that dude another number....45

peon36: Malinki: That must be a union wage.

You must be from Philly to think like that>

Heh, actually just outside Pittsburgh.

Only $30? Sounds like he's undercutting the market.

/guess it's better than price gouging

chaosdeathgerbil: piaddic120: Another $20 and he coulda gotten a rimjob

How much for one of these?

50 cent

The Angry Hand of God: I usually find that just saying "If you are going to pull that knife on me you better be ready to have some sex," usually works out pretty well.

!

El_Swino: You know, most people will hand over the money if you only threaten to stab them...

Is this your experience? ;) I wonder if the guy tried to haggle?

Sounds like a pretty good example of armed robbery to me. Oh, and assault with a deadly weapon.

You can't really put a price on a good stabbin

nothing feels more liberating

And here I am only paying 5 bucks for TotalFark.

toraque: And here I am only paying 5 bucks for TotalFark.

That comes to two stabbings per year.

toraque: And here I am only paying 5 bucks for TotalFark.

Almost seems like a bargain now, doesn't it?

/would only pay $24.37 to stop a stabbing
//up to $42.69 to stop a shooting
///would consider $60.00 and one of my Bucs tickets for you to put that flamethrower away

I'm having difficulty figuring out which man in the article is "the man" and which was "a man," but it sure sounds like the stabee ended up in jail?

*sigh* ...capitalism.

TheDaymoose: flyf15

The article describes it as a fight where a knife came out, and the guy pretty much said "No wait this sucks, I'm sorry, here's $30 dollars to stop"

Robbery starts with intent to get money, this guy just saw a good deal and took it.

If it kept him from dying, then it was a smart thing to do. The smartest thing to do would be to have not gotten in the altercation in the first place. However, speaking as someone whose office is right behind a nasty bar, sometimes trouble finds you.

Nice, I just took my son to that park last weekend.

Stabber got ripped, victim would've gone as high as $200.

Should've checked on eBay first.

tonguedepressor: Should've checked on eBay first.

B-

Would consider stabbing again.

Don't suppose he wrote a check? Nah, definitely would've aimed a lot higher than $30!

It was probably a bum fight, being videotaped for youtube.
Here in Salt Lake City, this is the "bad" park, where the homeless and the junkies hang out. It's somewhat humorous, to hear people talk about it as if it were a gangland warzone and awful violent crimes are commonplace. My guess is that they have never lived in another city other than SLC, where any crime involving a minority is automatically described in the media as being gang related. Yeah, y'know, because there's such a bad gang problem here.
(trying not to snicker)

E Arkhe: The attacker must have slashed his prices.

Watch out, you're so sharp you might cut yourself.

OW! How about 20? ARRRRGH! 30?

free market biatches!

The article never actually states whether the guy giving the stabber $30 was successful in stopping the stabber froms stabbing him. After all, if I were the stabber, I'd take the money, but I'd probably still stab. Taking money under false pretenses? No because I would eventually stop.

/Not that I actually stab anyone.

How about:

"Man, stabbed, invents concept of hold-up."