Never trust anything you buy in a bodega. Even the porn.

From the FA:
sold fake vodka containing methanol...
...Fake vodka has been found to contain high levels of methanol...

Ok, so which is it? Did the "Fake" vodka actually contain methanol, or is it just suspected to contain methanol because previous examples have contained methanol? If the booze is only alleged to contain methanol, then the Guardian may have libeled the poor shopkeeper.

And what's so "fake" about the lighters? Regardless of their safety, there is no indication that the lighters would fail to light your fag. A cigarette lighter that can, in the hands of a person of reasonable skill, light a cigarette could be considered a genuine cigarette lighter. If the issue is that the lighters are branded "clipper" but not a product of B&M, then perhaps this aspect could have been made more clear.


/Yah I know this is a serious issue.

I think they should have realized it was fake when the label said "Vodak"

Damn longears trying to steal Easter from Jesus.

Hardly related, but fark it:

"Store owner fined for selling fake vodak"

I'm veyr particulra about the qualiyt of the vodak I drikn.

JFC

It's VODKA.




/sorry, pet peeve.

196 clicks and it's farked already.

Toss in some insta-shred condoms and you've got an unforgettable weekend


Well it certainly would make for a good Vodak moment.

Linked Farked already?

Farkin morans. VODAK!

DrRatchet: From the FA:
sold fake vodka containing methanol...
...Fake vodka has been found to contain high levels of methanol...


And what's so "fake" about the lighters? Regardless of their safety, there is no indication that the lighters would fail to light your fag. A cigarette lighter that can, in the hands of a person of reasonable skill, light a cigarette could be considered a genuine cigarette lighter. If the issue is that the lighters are branded "clipper" but not a product of B&M, then perhaps this aspect could have been made more clear.


/Yah I know this is a serious issue.

I don't know the correct name, but those lighters that are not bics, not cricket, the one that are jewel-tone and clear and cost 50 cents? Most of them are illegal in Mexico and other places because they'll crack open if you drop them, extremely unpredictable flame, they'll melt on your dashboard, etc.
Link (new window)

orionid: 196 clicks and it's farked already.

Nothing like a Fark headline with sex, booze and lighting of farts.

/wait, what?

whizbang: orionid: 196 clicks and it's farked already.

Nothing like a Fark headline with sex, booze and lighting of farts.

/wait, what?

Yeah, but at 196 clicks? I'm pretty sure my old-arse athlon K7 650 Mhz gathering dust in the closet could have handled that traffic.

Homer: Let me have one of those porno magazines, large box of condoms, a bottle of Old Harper, a couple of those panty shields, and some illegal fireworks, and one of those disposable enemas... eh, make it two.

Marge: I don't know what you've got planned for tonight, Homer, but count me out.

Byno: Hardly related, but fark it:

How "hardly related"? Like third cousins once-removed or something like that?

Thanks for giving this thread meaning.

/Or moaning ...
//fapfapfapfapfap

Ooooo NOES!!!!
No one knows how to search...
www.yourlocalguardian.co.uk/news/local/topstories/3606617.Fine_for_fake_vodka/

Approves

Tr0mBoNe: Never trust anything you buy in a bodega. Even the porn.

Say it with me, now. Bo-dA-gus. Yes, Very good.

Pyr0: Farkin morans. VODAK!

Paging teh vodak - is he still around?

The best part about these threads is the new Farkers trying to helpfully correct the submitter's spelling of 'vodak', which as all Farkers know, is already spelled correctly.

Warning: your stubbornness in misspelling 'vodka' may cause you to be labelled a looser.

/ that is all.

Was Vodak a character on "Starre Trekke"?

Pyr0: Farkin morans. VODAK!

Link (new window)

". vodak
248 up, 88 downlove ithate it

Further proof that even the most idiotic brainfart can become a meme.
Typical FARK reader: "Vodak! LOL! It's funny and I don't know why! OMGWTFLOLBBQ""

/'nuff

We just need to start all of these vodak threads with a transcript of past explanations. Save the space of the "OMFg Guyz its vodka durr!"

/its getting old
//and its sunny and I can't go outside, so I am particularly irritable
///grrrrr

did someone call?

I remember the first Vodak thread. God those were the days.

yay vodak lolz

scare-crow:

That looked shopped. I can tell from some of the...

maq0r: JFC

It's VODKA.

/sorry, pet peeve. peave.

/sorry, pet peave.

If mag0r is aware of the Rotsky meme, I'm sure he knows how to spell VODAK.

I want to go to this store.

Educate me... I've seen vodak more than once this week in a link...new farkism?

Of course Vodak is not real Vodka. He's innocent.

maq0r: JFC

It's VODKA.

/sorry, pet peeve.

JFC

It's FARK

/not sorry, you need a sense of humor

Nicolette: Educate me... I've seen vodak more than once this week in a link...new farkism?

I tell ya, kids these days don't know their history. Next thing you know, somebody's gonna say they don't know what the Ballsack Conundrum was.

/lawn, etc.

Man, that was one crazy Yom Kippur!

i would love to leave a comment here, but i must rush down to teh supramarkit and poke holes in all the instant noodle packages.

Did someone ask for......

maq0r: JFC

It's VODKA.

/sorry, pet peeve.

You must be new here. Welcome to FARK.

Here's how to ruin perfectly good vodak by making it into Kahlua.

Make gourmet coffee with 12 tablespoons of coffee and 4 cups of water. Very strong. The best is unfiltered camp coffee. If you are wimpy, use 12 teaspoons of instant coffee in 4 cups water.

Mix hot coffee with 4 cups of raw cane sugar until sugar dissolves.

Add a split vanilla bean, not vanilla extract. Cover and let sit another 10 minutes.

Add a fifth of at least 100 proof vodak, then store in a quart dark glass bottle.

Uhm, Goofball_Jones: maq0r: JFC

It's VODKA.

/sorry, pet peeve.

You must be new here. Welcome to FARK.

Uhm, old enough to know what a Rotsky is.

/03'r

could I get a fake Hungarian Phrasebook with that, please?

"I will not buy this record; it is scratched!"