whatever.

we look hot.

Starryeyes: whatever.

we look hot.

Word.

And no, you may not touch our heinies.

My wife brushes her hair, puts on her glasses, then wonders why the hell I'm taking so long to get ready ;)

I don't spend that long to get ready.
Seriously, though, twenty minutes on makeup? It's not that hard to do some foundation, a little blush, lipstick, and mascara. Really.
And it doesn't take that long to shower or fix your hair.

/some women must just be slow

hollahollaholz: I don't spend that long to get ready.
Seriously, though, twenty minutes on makeup? It's not that hard to do some foundation, a little blush, lipstick, and mascara. Really.
And it doesn't take that long to shower or fix your hair.

/some women must just be slow

I don't wear quite that much makeup, but whatever time I save with the makeup I lose in the shower shaving. Then I've got to moisturize.

On the upside, I have a pair of Rock & Republic jeans that really show off the bike legs and ass so figuring out what to wear is easy.

hollahollaholz: I don't spend that long to get ready.
Seriously, though, twenty minutes on makeup? It's not that hard to do some foundation, a little blush, lipstick, and mascara. Really.
And it doesn't take that long to shower or fix your hair.

/some women must just be slow

makeup takes me under 5 minutes.

Makeup tastes horrible. Cum as you are.

soze: I don't wear quite that much makeup, but whatever time I save with the makeup I lose in the shower shaving. Then I've got to moisturize.

On the upside, I have a pair of Rock & Republic jeans that really show off the bike legs and ass so figuring out what to wear is easy.

See, living in a humid area (and having naturally oily skin) I save time by not having to moisturize.

Starryeyes: makeup takes me under 5 minutes.

It probably takes me five minutes, tops.

As a guy with a girlfriend with an ex-boyfriend who took longer than she and her 3 kids to get ready for a night out I'm really getting a kick out of these replies.

If I take a long time to get ready it's because I'm stalling and don't really want to leave.

eqtworld: Have you ever seen them without the makeup?

It's better to let them paint their faces than walk around displaying the awful truth in broad daylight.

it's to keep you from wanting to hang out during the day time.

more me time.

My wife doesn't wear makeup or dress all fancy or even do anything with her hair other than run a brush through it, yet it still takes her three times as long to get ready to go somewhere than it does me.

Plus she walks so farking slow it drives me insane.


Anybody have the number for a good divorce attorney?

re: If I take a long time to get ready it's because I'm stalling and don't really want to leave.

haha. not a people person. kinda makes your post irrelevant, honey.

I knew I could count on Dirty Des to explain it.

Starryeyes: whatever.

we look hot.

Yes. Yes you are.

/mmmmm... short hair....mmmmmm

Yes, but how much time to we spend traveling to the gem?

26 minutes a day?

accujimmy: Yes. Yes you are.

/mmmmm... short hair....mmmmmm

too many mmm's.

and those are bangs, buddy, not short hair.

...and unfortunately what most of them don't understand is that most guys don't care about all that makeup and shiat, in fact, lots of guys (myself included) prefer them without all that crap covering their faces. It's mostly just an effort to save face around other women. Personally I prefer natural-looking to someone who looks like she's covered in clown makeup.

It's because they have to make sure they're better looking than the rest of the biatches out there.

gym rather...

TFA:
Men, however, devote a mere 1,092 hours in a lifetime

/Half of which are ghey...

//soze, how are you doin' ?

My ex girlfriend and myself used to live with a gay couple.

Gay men are MUCH worse. They'd take two hours apiece compared to her hour.

I knew this redhead in college. She was great looking, really built
and never went anywhere, including class, without being all dolled up.
She had a boyfriend back home so I was on the side, no complaints.

She told me she got up at 4am to start getting ready for an 8am
class. She was doing it for herself, not me.

/too damn much work if you ask me

I'm a guy, and I haven't had hair for almost 2 years, so I can't really relate. However, having witnessed the elaborate rituals my sister undergoes before she can leave the house, I think I can clear up where the time drains are.

First is her hair, which is lovingly blow-dried after her shower, then straightened, then possibly manipulated in some other arcane way by a curling iron. No, I don't understand why she does both.

Next comes make-up, which is actually the shortest part of the whole rigamarole.

The final step is outfit selection, the largest time drain of them all. She'll go through 3 outfits at a minimum before deciding on the first thing she picked out. The problem is, changing shirts so many times means she has to go back at least once to fix her hair again. It's quite a mess.

Hope that clears things up. Don't be my sister, ladies.

SpinStopper: My wife brushes her hair, puts on her glasses, then wonders why the hell I'm taking so long to get ready ;)

You are not my husband.

altinos: It's because they have to make sure they're better looking than the rest of the biatches out there.

27 seconds after my post but much more succinctly put.

They forgot to include the amount of time it takes for the average gold-digging bimbo to eat the souls of small children

Fat Horny Black and Joe: ...and unfortunately what most of them don't understand is that most guys don't care about all that makeup and shiat, in fact, lots of guys (myself included) prefer them without all that crap covering their faces. It's mostly just an effort to save face around other women. Personally I prefer natural-looking to someone who looks like she's covered in clown makeup.

if she's doing it right, you won't notice. makeup should be used to accentuate your features, not distract from them. it should look natural and never ever look clownish.

it's a matter of taste and elegance of execution.

soze: I don't wear quite that much makeup, but whatever time I save with the makeup I lose in the shower shaving. Then I've got to moisturize.



Did someone say 'moisturize'?

/Speaking of moisturizers (pops)
//Moist.

TheRockinDonkey: Plus she walks so farking slow it drives me insane.

My GF always cuts me off or edges me into the wall when we walk together, then complains when I walk behind her. Drives me insane, still love her though.

TheRockinDonkey: My wife doesn't wear makeup or dress all fancy or even do anything with her hair other than run a brush through it, yet it still takes her three times as long to get ready to go somewhere than it does me.

Plus she walks so farking slow it drives me insane.


Anybody have the number for a good divorce attorney?

1-800-F'CK'N-U-GOT.

/Try da veal.

My wife says that she can't get ready with me in the bedroom. So, I walk around the living room like a dumb ass waiting for her.

I am pretty sure 20 mins for makeup refers to the girls who draw their eyebrows on and load on the eye-shadow and mascara, or the ones who do the terrible lip liner in a different color than their lipstick - classy.

PS Why do those people pluck/shave their eyebrows off, then draw them on. I looks terrible, I just don't get it.

SanDiegoFarker: My wife says that she can't get ready with me in the bedroom. So, I walk around the living room like a dumb ass waiting for her.

she's got a male model under the bed, helping her "get ready".

Fat Horny Black and Joe: It's mostly just an effort to save face around other women.

Exactly. The truth, in bold:

Women don't spend countless hours dressing themselves up so they can impress guys. They do it to impress other women.

SanDiegoFarker: My wife says that she can't get ready with me in the bedroom. So, I walk around the living room like a dumb ass waiting for her.

She's letting her lover out through the fire escape.

Five minutes for makeup, but I hate my hair. I either spend zero minutes or like half an hour on it, depending on my degree of apathy.

Starryeyes: SanDiegoFarker: My wife says that she can't get ready with me in the bedroom. So, I walk around the living room like a dumb ass waiting for her.

she's got a male model under the bed, helping her "get ready".

Man. 90 seconds. I had editor issues.

Not for these sassy go-getters!

katlass: who do the terrible lip liner in a different color than their lipstick - classy.

Wait, hold on. There's a difference between lip liner and lip stick?

I'm with Robinqwerty. Five minutes for makeup by I have a fro if I don't blowdry it straight. That takes forever. So, ten-fifteen minutes for shower, five minutes for makeup, 20-30 minutes for hair. Ugh, makes me sweat just thinking about it.

Outfit selection, my biggest timekiller. Hair? Whatever. Makeup? Rarely worn. But clothes, it kills me everytime.

Well, that and spending too much time hanging around the internet.

Ishkur: Fat Horny Black and Joe: It's mostly just an effort to save face around other women.

Exactly. The truth, in bold:

Women don't spend countless hours dressing themselves up so they can impress guys. They do it to impress other women.

They also really want guys who are sweet and funny, and size doesn't matter.

I like the term whorepaint.

Am I clean? Am I wearing enough clothing (including appropriate shoes)? Pit stop/brush teeth?

Alright then, let's rock.

/generally I can be out the door in five minutes, ten tops

Women be shopp-ing!

/Shopping, ya'll!

Small Bite: I'm with Robinqwerty. Five minutes for makeup by I have a fro if I don't blowdry it straight. That takes forever. So, ten-fifteen minutes for shower, five minutes for makeup, 20-30 minutes for hair. Ugh, makes me sweat just thinking about it.

Checks profile.....that's not a fro

emilyek_1: They also really want guys who are sweet and funny to cry on their shoulders about the assholes they've been dating

:)

SpinStopper: My wife brushes her hair, puts on her glasses, then wonders why the hell I'm taking so long to get ready ;)

Have you checked to make sure s/he's a woman?

katlass - I don't know about the other women, but my grandmother plucked ALL her eyebrows out and they never grew back. She was stuck penciling them on for yeeeears.