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(Daily Mail) Strange The English government wants you to exercise at bus stops by standing on one leg, pointing your toes or clenching your buttocks   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 56
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Whamdangler 2008-08-17 01:11:41 AM  
That's what it's all about...

 
patrick767 [TotalFark] 2008-08-17 01:22:47 AM  
I always clench my buttocks at bus stops so all the ladiez can admire my tight ass. Ohhhh yeah.

 
floor9 [TotalFark] 2008-08-17 04:19:17 AM  
Laugh all you want, but everything you do burns calories. And weight loss is nothing if not ("calories in" < "calories out"). What you have to do is weigh the benefit of burning an extra calorie by clenching / unclenching your fists rapidly versus the risk of Carpal Tunnel plus the risk of looking like a complete tool.

But why burn five calories standing on one leg when you can simply fail to ingest 250 calories by cutting out that soda with lunch?

 
floor9 [TotalFark] 2008-08-17 04:23:04 AM  
True story. A former coworker -- who probably lurks around here somewhere -- used to swear he had the system beat. He absolutely swore that he would lose ten pounds a week, without changing his diet, by doing things like drumming his fingers or swinging his legs under his chair all day at work. He also stuffed his face with super-sized Big Mac value meals at any given opportunity and drank Mountain Dew by the case.

He never lost weight.

 
Sylvia_Bandersnatch 2008-08-17 05:51:19 AM  
floor9: True story. A former coworker -- who probably lurks around here somewhere -- used to swear he had the system beat. He absolutely swore that he would lose ten pounds a week, without changing his diet, by doing things like drumming his fingers or swinging his legs under his chair all day at work. He also stuffed his face with super-sized Big Mac value meals at any given opportunity and drank Mountain Dew by the case.

He never lost weight.


But did he gain weight, or just maintain some sort of equilibrium? Also, as nasty as that food is, I guess if that's all he ate (meaning, he did not eat other than what you saw), it's not so many calories per day. I did read an article a few years ago saying that ordinary nervous habits like fidgeting, etc., really do burn a fair amount of energy, and that people with these habits were generally slimmer than more sedate people. Also much more annoying.

 
Sylvia_Bandersnatch 2008-08-17 05:52:34 AM  
People here do that stuff all the time at bus stops, and much more odd physical stuff. But I don't think it's about fitness. More about meth.

 
JerkyMeat 2008-08-17 05:52:54 AM  
Smoke a joint on the bus and relax instead.

 
frostus [TotalFark] 2008-08-17 05:54:19 AM  
i63.photobucket.com

 
myalias1845 2008-08-17 05:55:45 AM  
I think this is all just propaganda to prevent those brits from farting.

 
Anti_Freak_Machine [TotalFark] 2008-08-17 05:58:38 AM  
Tell that to the hobo that pees on me at bus stops!

 
JesusIsNowBlind 2008-08-17 06:05:36 AM  
Because walking to and from the bus stop isn't exercise?

 
CoRrUpTeDbUdGiE 2008-08-17 06:06:31 AM  
I live in Manchester and I'm getting a kick out of these replies...

Seriously though, I do have a small congenital spinal problem that, over the years is getting more and more painful and the only cure for it (other than painkillers) is excercise. I also watch my diet too and include tons of fresh food and very rarely see the inside of a fast-food restaraunt. In fact, yeah, eating healthy and excercising has made me gain weight!! I used to be a lithe 8stone something... now I'm 10stone something. I walk everywhere too, so the whole deal about excerising at bus stops is somewhat lost on me.

Housework certainly burns a lot of calories if not more so! Get rid of the vacuum cleaner and use a sweeping brush if you want to see some real calories get burnt off!

Adult size pedal cars - fantastic idea. Base it on a good leverage system and put a few gears in it - brilliant, I'll buy one tomorrow :-D
(Would be handy for shopping and cutting those pesky greenhouse gasses too)

 
ultraholland 2008-08-17 06:07:22 AM  
'Make exercising on the X41 part of your everyday bus travel. The exercises are easy, fun to do and discreet!'


i.dailymail.co.uk

Discreet, huh?

/Fail-linked

 
JesusIsNowBlind 2008-08-17 06:15:53 AM  
Ultraholland -

Why is there a Pepperpot in your picture?

 
myalias1845 2008-08-17 06:21:21 AM  
What the fark is that thing on the right of the pic? I have a really hard time believing that "old lady" is as old as dressed and is female...undercover bobby?

 
WeeKeef [TotalFark] 2008-08-17 06:26:28 AM  
Bus services in Manchester must be really bad. That third woman seems to have been waiting there since 1941.

 
12inpianist 2008-08-17 06:27:36 AM  
I would like to extend an invitation to the British Government to eat shiat.

 
Bad_Seed 2008-08-17 06:34:59 AM  
There is an English government? That's news to me.

 
bahknee 2008-08-17 06:36:05 AM  
news.thomasnet.com

/obligatory

 
Control_this [TotalFark] 2008-08-17 06:46:46 AM  
I do Kegels any time I'm talking to someone on the phone.

/My prostate qualified for the Olympics.

 
Jazzycat 2008-08-17 06:49:05 AM  
Bad_Seed: There is an English government? That's news to me.

That's what I came to say.

I think poor misguided subby meant British government, but I know how confusing that is.

4 countries in Britain? What? Britain is not the capital of England? The world is round?

Yeah, and Canada is the capital city of North America.

*mutters*

 
chandrika 2008-08-17 06:59:14 AM  
Maybe if healthy food wasnt so expensive it wouldnt be so difficult to remain healthy.

It bugs me when i watch these healthy eating programmes, and I am mentally totting up the cost of the healthy meal, with punnets of blueberries, organic walnuts and lean free range chicken breasts, drizzled in low fat truffle oil...and am thinking ..i cant afford to eat that stuff....when a salad costs a fiver...its easy to see why many might choose a 99p cheeseburger to fill their tummies.

 
zamboni 2008-08-17 07:27:24 AM  
What are we supposed to be exercising... if ya know what I mean?

 
starsrift 2008-08-17 07:39:29 AM  
The Physical Jerks?

/ Why does England remind me so much of Orwell's dystopian vision?

 
MattofBum 2008-08-17 07:45:12 AM  
ecx.images-amazon.com

 
pjc51 2008-08-17 07:50:04 AM  
floor9: Laugh all you want, but everything you do burns calories. And weight loss is nothing if not ("calories in" < "calories out"). What you have to do is weigh the benefit of burning an extra calorie by clenching / unclenching your fists rapidly versus the risk of Carpal Tunnel plus the risk of looking like a complete tool.

But why burn five calories standing on one leg when you can simply fail to ingest 250 calories by cutting out that soda with lunch?


Or get off the bus a couple of steps before your destination and walk the rest of the way, or cycle the whole way...

I agree though that what they're suggesting is going to make naff all difference to people's fitness if they don't do anything else - it's pretty much equivalent to the stretches you do before a workout.

 
Only_A_Lad 2008-08-17 07:54:02 AM  
Even as an American, I know not to trust the Daily Mail.

But I really hope this is true. God, it would just be so farking fantastic if a government was funding this program. The only thing that could make this better would be if McDonald's promoted this as an activity while in line.

 
Scott77 2008-08-17 08:12:24 AM  
Is there anything the government won't fund?

 
12inpianist 2008-08-17 08:18:11 AM  
Scott77: Is there anything the government won't fund?

Straight, white, Anglo-Saxon Protestant males.

 
scamp-dun-emer 2008-08-17 08:44:20 AM  
You can kegel anywhere, anytime

/not limited to the bus stop
//best during boring meetings or social functions

 
Gobobo 2008-08-17 08:53:57 AM  
i193.photobucket.com

That is all.

 
tomhath 2008-08-17 08:54:26 AM  
CoRrUpTeDbUdGiE
I live in Manchester and I'm getting a kick out of these replies...

Seriously though, I do have a small congenital spinal problem that, over the years is getting more and more painful and the only cure for it (other than painkillers) is excercise...


On this side of the pond, the treatment for that is to buy an H2 Hummer.

 
12inpianist 2008-08-17 08:55:08 AM  
i83.photobucket.com

 
Nocens 2008-08-17 10:02:13 AM  
The first woman who stands on one leg, falls and breaks something, then sues the city...

Will put an end to this.

 
LewDux 2008-08-17 10:33:25 AM  
myalias1845: What the fark is that thing on the right of the pic? I have a really hard time believing that "old lady" is as old as dressed and is female...undercover bobby?

Looks like Ronald Rumsfeld

 
XxDavidZullenxX 2008-08-17 11:08:04 AM  
Do Kegel Exercises. Has sexual benefits and no one can see you doing them unless you're at the bus stop naked.

 
theorellior 2008-08-17 12:29:15 PM  
ultraholland: Discreet, huh?

It must be cold out, too.

 
Aulus [TotalFark] 2008-08-17 12:47:38 PM  
I came here for the Ministry of Silly Walks references and was not disappointed.

 
kd6nig 2008-08-17 01:00:07 PM  
Isn't that what the "Captain Morgan" commercials for the "pose off" want men to to also? Hold that one foot up in the air like a nimrod?

 
Whoreable 2008-08-17 01:11:55 PM  
I am pretty sure that most people who are forced to use public transportation get enough exercise at the shiatty job they are going to.

 
Gobobo 2008-08-17 01:53:08 PM  
Whoreable: I am pretty sure that most people who are forced to use public transportation get enough exercise at the shiatty job they are going to.

3/10

 
strathmeyer 2008-08-17 02:37:14 PM  
ultraholland: Discreet, huh?

Maybe they're just trying to escape those stupid shoes?

 
SquirrelHill 2008-08-17 03:54:41 PM  
I came to see how long it took someone to post something about the Ministry of Silly Walks. Fark does not disappoint.

 
Smellvin 2008-08-17 04:01:20 PM  
Control_this: I do Kegels any time I'm talking to someone on the phone.

/My prostate qualified for the Olympics.


Umm... I thought kegels were just for the ladies. What benefits do they have for males?

 
ultraholland 2008-08-17 04:08:28 PM  
Smellvin: Umm... I thought kegels were just for the ladies. What benefits do they have for males?

They aid in man chowder retention.

 
Control_this [TotalFark] 2008-08-17 04:21:48 PM  
Smellvin: Umm... I thought kegels were just for the ladies. What benefits do they have for males?

My jizz now has the stopping power of a .44 hollowpoint.

 
theorellior 2008-08-17 04:26:38 PM  
Control_this: My jizz now has the stopping power of a .44 hollowpoint.

I use mine to powerwash my deck.

 
Control_this [TotalFark] 2008-08-17 04:36:40 PM  
Mine once launched a sock into low earth orbit.

 
establishmentarian 2008-08-17 04:48:05 PM  
chandrika: Maybe if healthy food wasnt so expensive it wouldnt be so difficult to remain healthy.

It bugs me when i watch these healthy eating programmes, and I am mentally totting up the cost of the healthy meal, with punnets of blueberries, organic walnuts and lean free range chicken breasts, drizzled in low fat truffle oil...and am thinking ..i cant afford to eat that stuff....when a salad costs a fiver...its easy to see why many might choose a 99p cheeseburger to fill their tummies.


I have been waiting for someone to say that. We do not need to raise the price of unhealthy food which I hear a lot. Rather lower the price of healthy food. I mean 3 dollars for one red bell pepper is ridiculous.

 
Nogale 2008-08-17 04:53:17 PM  
ultraholland: 'Make exercising on the X41 part of your everyday bus travel. The exercises are easy, fun to do and discreet!'

Discreet, huh?

/Fail-linked


What porn may look like?

 
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