Oh yeah. Life goes on. Long after the cellphone account is drawn.

+1 for the headline.

I can just see all the Farkers singing these lyrics, trying desperately to find something wrong with it.

coco ebert: I can just see all the Farkers singing these lyrics, trying desperately to find something wrong with it.

I wasn't looking for anything wrong...but I admit to singing them whilst reading them.

That's an awesome headline...

Great headline, but an old story that i think was already greenlit. Still, this one gets my vote.

What did they keep showing up at the house for? To make sure she was still dead?

Tr0mBoNe: What did they keep showing up at the house for? To make sure she was still dead?

When failing to report a death for nefarious purposes, it is often advisable to go to the house to collect the mail and generally keep the property maintained, so as not to arouse suspicions.

BKITU: Tr0mBoNe: What did they keep showing up at the house for? To make sure she was still dead?

When failing to report a death for nefarious purposes, it is often advisable to go to the house to collect the mail and generally keep the property maintained, so as not to arouse suspicions.

. . . gotta collect those pension and SS checks.

Sick stuff.

Anything you're not telling us, BKITU?

Good headline but that song just doesn't seem as good to me since Jessica Simpson bastardized it.

I actually thought of this to the tune of "The Beverly Hillbillies."

/dead, that is
//kicked the bucket
///nailed to the perch

Oh yeahhh, life goes on...

oh wait.

atomic-age: . . . gotta collect those pension and SS checks.

That too.


Painezor: Anything you're not telling us, BKITU?

MY PARENTS ARE BOTH ALIVE!

<_< >_>

Norman Bates called and wants his headline back.

Mummy Dearest.

I read this story a few weeks ago. It gets stranger.

Link (new window)

/Hope this works

This headline almost makes the song tolerable. Which is a considerable step up from its current level - crime against humanity.

My first favorite artist and first concert... brings back memories.

+1
/from a liter

Lols @ Btkitu, sounds like he's done this many times.

Hmmm about 15 minutes, probably the closest Fark story to me I've seen.

+1
/I lol'd
//and sang too

pmpn8ez: My first favorite artist and first concert... brings back memories.

+1
/from a liter

Saw him last week in Las Vegas. Good show. Didn't do that song though.

Collecting a little Social Security I imagine.....

Cubs567: Lols @ Btkitu, sounds like he's done this many times.

YOU CAN'T PROVE ANYTHING!

adnilolli2

I read this story a few weeks ago. It gets stranger.

No kidding. Thanks for the link!

Simmeck or Simmick? Which is it?

/Great job editors.

FTFA authorities say John Simmeck and his sister Diane Simmeck made biannual trips to their mother's ramshackle house in Middlefield, Connecticut, stepping over her mummified remains on the floor.

Dang, literally Jack and Diane, not just a snarky use of the song for the headline. Bravo, subby.

Majorly weird story.

Not sure if I like the John Mellencamp reference.

Not because I hate John, Because I really do like his music and this seemed like poor taste to link his muse to this sickness.


Does Not Approve

NickBob78: Collecting a little Social Security I imagine.....

Nope. I RTFA, and apparently nobody bothered to do anything when she croaked, including forge her SS checks.

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

FTFA:
Police believe Ann Simmeck was 72 when she died of natural causes late 1999 or early 2000. They discovered her body in June 2007

It took 7 years for someone to worry about her? Great kids.

There is a mummy mommie jike in there somewhere.

You could say she died on LSD.

Nothing says home more than a mummified body on the carpet.

Semi-irrelevant:

Diane Simmeck

/baby that's a man

adnilolli2: I read this story a few weeks ago. It gets stranger.

Link (new window)

/Hope this works

Thanks for the link, it's a good thing and
OMG, Diane has the most awesome femullet! Yuck.

In a 100-page state police case file, authorities say John Simmeck and his sister Diane Simmeck made biannual trips to their mother's ramshackle house in Middlefield, Connecticut, stepping over her mummified remains on the floor.

You know...just when i thought that i had people kinda figured out. There is always some new depth that we can sink to.

John Booger Melonhead?

Long after the day of living is done.

/stuck in head

coco ebert: I can just see all the Farkers singing these lyrics, trying desperately to find something wrong with it.

Well, it happened in Middlesex, not Hartford, County. And this story made it to the front page (with a less funnier headline, IIRC) back in the good ole days of 2007, when it actually went down, but for all that, it was pretty darn catchy.

Approves

adnilolli2: I read this story a few weeks ago. It gets stranger.

Link (new window)

/Hope this works

Wow, that's a really sick story. I knew about it, but I didn't know the details. That whole family sounds farked.

I know kids walk all over their parents these days....

Lessee...

"I'm in some trouble with the law, and my mom just died out in her cabin in Connecticut. So, I'll just not tell anyone she died and leave the corpse on the floor to decompose. Yeah! That ought to keep me out of trouble with the cops when they eventually find the remains! Sounds good! What could go wrong?"

BKITU: Tr0mBoNe: What did they keep showing up at the house for? To make sure she was still dead?

When failing to report a death for nefarious purposes, it is often advisable to go to the house to collect the mail and generally keep the property maintained, so as not to arouse suspicions.

Who exactly advised this?