So she wanted to have a one night stand with a guy she knew... seems better than computer dating. Plus... we'll let Dave Chapelle ask "how old is 15?" (new window, NSFW-ish) (17 in this case.)

Lastly, where was she when I was 17? I wouldn't have even required the booze, depending on what she looked like from the neck down.

AND... the thread requires no more comments.

/I'd hit it.

came in to snark about subby not knowing the definition of "hittable"...

but subby called it perfectly..semi-hittable

/teaches me to RTFA, wasted a perfectly good snark

6/10

If by "semi" you mean "truck" then yes, a truck hit it.

Manta537: If by "semi" you mean "truck" then yes, a truck hit it.

Dammit. Beat me to it.

She's a 5-7 beer girl. Her or Andrea Mackris?

Manta537: If by "semi" you mean "truck" then yes, a truck hit it.

I would be semi-hard if I hit that.

That's one of the worst designed websites I've seen.

I'd hit her though.

It looks like a semi already hit her.

My fellow Farkers have standards I do not understand. That is NOT semi-hittable. That is 100% hittable and by a good margin.

OriginalGamer: My fellow Farkers have standards I do not understand. That is NOT semi-hittable. That is 100% hittable and by a good margin.

Oooooh! She's got a good margin? I gotta see that ...

*click*

bang it like a cheap screen door.

Horrible web page is horrible.

OriginalGamer: My fellow Farkers have standards I do not understand. That is NOT semi-hittable. That is 100% hittable and by a good margin.

If you mean like giving her 2 black eyes then yes...

Greenwood WHERE? If that's the town paper, it's amazing they have more than a live, full time cop. No lach of rats, apparently. Some good citizen dropped a dime on a pot sale and look at the doofus got nabbed; Harry The MFing Carwash Worked. Bad enough there are laws that make a little wssd such a crime, but it also fark up this guys whole life in the process

if by semi hittable you mean non hittable,

then this pic makes me semi hard.

...a real model of website desgin, that one.

kaseyfarksdaladies: Manta537: If by "semi" you mean "truck" then yes, a truck hit it.

I would be semi-hard if I hit that.

came here to say this.

Ware Shoals, more like Whore Sales

I really do love Fark sometimes :-)

Any of these 'semi-hittable' or 'un-hittable' farkette's ever in the Rohnert Park area of Northern California drop me an email and i'll buy you a beer while other Farkers complain about sharp knee's and so forth on a Friday/Saturday night ;-)

I'm more interested in this story

/Huge story links are also huge.

Some 17-year-olds got farked up on peach schnapps? Well there's your "Local Breaking News 24/7".

Bartles & Jaymes should send out a product rep.

/TONY DAVIS for Sheriff
//woo!

kbarham: Some 17-year-olds got farked up on peach schnapps? Well there's your "Local Breaking News 24/7".

Bartles & Jaymes should send out a product rep.

/TONY DAVIS for Sheriff
//woo!

Just barely beat $50 GAS CARD WINNER!!!!111+eleven for front page headline.

I'm from Greenwood SC so I'm really getting... nah screw that. It's too damn hot, everything smells like pork and stale beer, and there's no decent women. Send help.

/Not Subby
//Really
///Ask about our catfish feastival

I submitted an article from Greenwood last week about two guys fighting over cornflakes ... honestly. The GwdToday website isn't the local paper, it's the competition. And they love to boast about their hit counts. I'd love to see their faces when they ring up all these hits!!

Um... Where's the sex in this story?

All I can see is an article about a 26-year-old former substitute teacher letting some high school seniors drink at a party at her place.

This isn't a scandal. It's a party where some minors crashed, or the host didn't care because she's an ignorant, backwoods, Gen-Y slattern that just likes to party.

Zulgaines: kbarham: Some 17-year-olds got farked up on peach schnapps? Well there's your "Local Breaking News 24/7".

Bartles & Jaymes should send out a product rep.

/TONY DAVIS for Sheriff
//woo!

Just barely beat $50 GAS CARD WINNER!!!!111+eleven for front page headline.

The "seventeen-year old" rapist looks like he's 30 on the main page of that site.

/redesign please!

Having hit much worse, recently in fact, I would dive into that like Oxburger into mud.

©

That newspaper's website looks like it's trapped in mid-1997. And I love the sidebar with SPORTS all big and lit up next to World News and the other topics.

No technology section, though. Whodathunkit?

ActualFarkal: That newspaper's website looks like it's trapped in mid-1997. And I love the sidebar with SPORTS all big and lit up next to World News and the other topics.

No technology section, though. Whodathunkit?

Technalogoawhatus? That thar's devil talk son.

This what you're referring to subby?

wow...i thought i was a being really clever...i guess i was "really clever" really late...

What is not hittable is that scary website......looks like the advertising inserts in sunday papers...- and the colors...ouch. By the look of the amount and type of "news" stories it's a pretty small place so if you want to go get your students drunk...leave town.

The "17-year-old rapist" story is utter crap. The guy was 17, and the girl (who he was dating, and I bet didn't LOOK her age) was 13.

That's four whole years' difference, and I betcha anything the girl wasn't a virgin when he got to her. (Just look at her choice in men!)

Four years' difference in age, and he's going to be on the sex offender list for the rest of his life. Good going, statutory rape laws!

Jeez. I've dated and had sex with women who were 20 years younger than me. (It was perfectly legal because they were 18 years old.) This guy farks a girl in his age-appropriate peer group, and he's labeled a child molester. Hell, she's probably intellectually more developed than he is, to boot!

Man, arbitrary age limits for things-- Sex, drinking, etc.-- Are stupid. Protect CHILDREN, not adolescents. I lost my virginity when I was 16 years old, and I could have done it sooner; My girlfriend at the time was a 19-year-old who was begging me to give it up, and I told her I wouldn't until I turned 16 (personal reasons). Sure enough, she jumped me on my 16th birthday.

And I was a LATE BLOOMER! Most of the girls in my school lost their virginity around the time they were 13, and the guys were losing it around the beginning of their 15th year. I was considered a prude (at first) because I wanted to wait.

Of course, once I lost it, I was a man-whore for the next 20 years, but that's another story.

My point is that they should have different laws for adolescents who are within four years in age of the adolescent they have sex with, instead of instantly calling it statutory rape. Of course, I would still push for stricter punishment for anyone who touches a pre-pubescent child, but post-pubescent adolescents are not as innocent as people want them to be. They're active, and they WILL have sex with each other.

Chances are this 13-year-old who is hitting the 17-year-old with statutory rape charges is AT THIS MOMENT sleeping with anther older guy. She's no victim. She's manipulating her parents and the law to punish an ex-boyfriend.

Oops. Sorry. I meant to say:

/threadjack over.

I don't think there are enough ads on that page.

"anonymous phone call stating that there was a possibility of underage drinking"

Whoever you are, you suck. Turning the kids in won't stop them. They're going to do what they want, and you can't stop them, no matter what you do.

SunDropLvr: And they love to boast about their hit counts.

From the site: You are visitor: 10,111,856

Wowza! They must hire someone to sit in the office and hit F5 on their webpage all day.

Philly: "anonymous phone call stating that there was a possibility of underage drinking"

Whoever you are, you suck. Turning the kids in won't stop them. They're going to do what they want, and you can't stop them, no matter what you do.

The party in question may have been making too much noise or too much ruckus--whoever called it in might not have been doing it to stop them...just to shut them up. I'd turn them in without a second thought. I don't particularly care one way or the other, but I do care if it is one of my neighbors. They can go do that crap in the woods.

I drove through Ware Shoals today on my way back to Clemson.

Noooo! Not Mary Walsh!

when Swain and two other individuals became aware that police had arrived at the home they walked across the street

Why is everyone is ignorant of 4th amendment rights? When the police arrive at your house, you lock the front door, step outside with the keys, and close it behind you. If you have a party at your house, you control the situation. Same thing if you carry contraband in a vehicle. (Or as Jay-Z put it: "The glove compartment's locked, so is the trunk in the back, I know my rights so you gonna need a warrant for that") Any lawyers out there want to clarify if they can enter your house on "probable cause" with an anonymous tip?

Ghastly: Noooo! Not Mary Walsh!

Only if she is in full Marge Delahunty gear............at least to begin

now where did this happen?
//two beers, I'd hit it
//who am I kidding, fark the beers

I'm here to submit that a non-celebrity cannot be deemed hittable or not w/o a picture of face and body. There are plenty of girls out there with nice faces, great smiles, and the body of a beached Blue Whale.

Make it stop.

/dnrtfa
//dnr...this comments thread either

At 25 she might have been hittable, 35 a milf, but she looks early to mid 40's and a porker at best. If I was drunk.
3/10.

Looks like a young Laura Bush.

Zulgaines: Horrible web page is horrible.

For the love of Allah, please don't bring the "[adjective] [noun] is [adjective]" meme to Fark. We have enough lame memes here as it is.

I'm looking at you, wharrgarbl.

ZeroCorpse
Um... Where's the sex in this story?

Read the headline again, slowly this time.