For the life of me ( wife too ) I do not understand why people WANT to start off thousands in the hole. Why not spend that money on a good down payment for a house, a car or travel Europe together?

Their first anniversary will be a trip to McDonalds and a nice plaque.

Nothing that a shotgun and a judge can't accomplish.

But, the more you spend, the longer it will last, right?

Vegas.
Drive Thru.
Elvis.
Married.

Fast, cheap and with Elvis presiding.

Just got to get the lady to agree on it.

I'm all for going to the courthouse with the immediate family, having it done, then throwing a party at a bar/grill.

Of course, having Elvis presiding would complete things...

Begs to differ

justbob2000: For the life of me ( wife too ) I do not understand why people WANT to start off thousands in the hole. Why not spend that money on a good down payment for a house, a car or travel Europe together?

They don't want to spend that much money. What happens, is, girls are raised to believe the wedding day is "their day," the money becomes irrelevant to fulfilling the dream, and it snowballs from there.

I, frankly, would have been happy with a JOP wedding, but as it was, I managed to get off for around $5000, no thanks to my mother's constant conversation starters. "Are you going to have (blank) at the wedding?" "No, we don't need (blank), Mom." "Well, you have to have (blank). It's not a wedding without (blank)."

Yeah, save the big money for the divorce.

Suddenly, the concept of a potluck wedding appeals to me. My family usually has a catering service come in, but we have a few really awesome cooks (I can point to two of my aunts, offhand), and a wedding would be a GREAT way to sample a lot of dishes that you normally don't get a chance to try.

Great way to save money on catering, too. But you don't need to tell anyone that.

Saborlas: Suddenly, the concept of a potluck wedding appeals to me. My family usually has a catering service come in, but we have a few really awesome cooks (I can point to two of my aunts, offhand), and a wedding would be a GREAT way to sample a lot of dishes that you normally don't get a chance to try.

Great way to save money on catering, too. But you don't need to tell anyone that.

I play in a dance band that will play for beer and $20 per player. Open bars are some of the greatest gigs.

Good for them. That's how it should be done.

On the other hand, they are idiots for getting married at that age.

Middle-class American weddings are pure insanity. Fifty grand for a day-long photo op.

justbob2000: For the life of me ( wife too ) I do not understand why people WANT to start off thousands in the hole. Why not spend that money on a good down payment for a house, a car or travel Europe together?

That is what I tell my cousins. Both of them got engaged a couple of months apart and their fiancess spent thousands on the rings and now they want to spend even more on the wedding. Why spend so much for only one day when you could put that money towards the things you mentioned? I dont get it.

justbob2000: For the life of me ( wife too ) I do not understand why people WANT to start off thousands in the hole. Why not spend that money on a good down payment for a house, a car or travel Europe together?

Very much this. Worked for us. My cousin did the same and put it all into a down payment to a nice house by the lake and sent us all invitations to visit, and oh by the way they got married.

The other rellies and friends families spend the money as a family penis measuring contest, crying when the other family spends more then them (reception vs rehearsal dinner) and somehow pressuring the new couple to spend a bit more to keep up.

It's not the ceremony that's important. It's the baby making capabilities. Otherwise there's no point.

All that expensive food and crap sucks. When I go to a wedding I want some chicken wings, lil' smokies, and keep beer and liquor flowing. I think I speak for everyone else too.

Sorry, subby, a cheap wedding is not and never will be the new hotness. The bridal-industrial complex will see to that.

We spent less than $400, and got $4,000 in gift-cash. Isn't that the point?

Yeah yeah I agree its a pretty lousy way to spend the money. Had mine in June for 90 people . . . total cost over 25k. We're lucky in that we had the money, but it sure could have gone to a lot of fun stuff to enjoy together instead of just showing our friends that we're not cheap.

daveydave: All that expensive food and crap sucks. When I go to a wedding I want some chicken wings, lil' smokies, and keep beer and liquor flowing. I think I speak for everyone else too.

THIS

If it wasn't for the fact that I really want my parents to be present, I would love to just run off to Paris to get married and have a fun party when we get back. Maybe I'll just pay for them to fly out too.

/wait... I don't have a boyfriend yet
//pulls cart back behind horse

The ball and chain begins with an expensive wedding.

theorellior: Sorry, subby, a cheap wedding is not and never will be the new hotness. The bridal-industrial complex will see to that.

This. It's like the military-industrial complex, but scarier.

Tr0mBoNe: Their first anniversary will be a trip to McDonalds and a nice plaque.

I first thought that you said "a trip to McDonalds and a nice plague." I was horrified. How could you subject someone to something so vile, so disgusting, to watch the life drain right out of them and see them die a slow, lingering death?

And then, on top of that you throw a deadly, highly contagious disease. Overkill ... just ... overkill.

I have five weddings this summer alone, and what I really don't get is the perception that wedding guests have to give in cash the equivalent that the bride and groom spent on feeding them, photos and the rest of that crap. Why are you having a wedding? TO subsidize your photographer? That's BS.

If the bub and I ever get married, I'd love a JP, potluck, open bar. The only tradition that I can't seem to want to rid myself of is the speeches. My dear Pa has waited his whole life to say a few words at my wedding.

We spent about $500 in '93, including $36.00 on a cake that was easily as good as $300 cakes we'd seen at other weddings. Food was pot-luck. The road trip honeymoon to House on the Rock came a few months later when the weather warmed up.

Hey, it's what we could afford...

/I loved the funny little janitor who kept telling us stories about spiders...

amo: "Are you going to have (Rhesus Monkeys) at the wedding?" "No, we don't need (Rhesus Monkeys), Mom." "Well, you have to have (Rhesus Monkeys). It's not a wedding without (Rhesus Monkeys)."


Your mother sounds awesome.

I was 17 when I got married, my hubby was 18, and no I was not pregnant. Anyway, we put the entire wedding together for less than $600. My mom made my dress, my friend made my cake, my dad had a photographer friend, and my aunts made the food. We had to pay the most for the flowers and the invitations. It turned out really well, and we were able to start our marriage with no debt. It was great. I'm almost 26 and we're still going strong. Who says you can't marry your high school sweetheart?

Under a grand? And I thought we were being thrifty spending around 5k on ours.

Please don't stop the expensive weddings! They're the single best place in the world for guys like me to hook up with random, drunken gals!


/Well, it was back when I was single.
//Srsly. Who doesn't love going to someone else's wedding?

We got married, then had a party - nothing fancy. Neither of us could really be bothered to make many arrangements, so we were too lazy to spend much money.

I did get in trouble though for spending $600 on a pair of shoes. Trickers FTW.

Taila82: Who says you can't marry your high school sweetheart?

My high-school sweetheart! Thanks for reminding me!


*gasps, sobs runs out of thread*
_/joking

As the father of two teenage daughters I certainly hope this is the new hotness.

But sadly I agree with theorellior regarding the bridal-industrial complex. Part of this is fed by the media with "My Super Sweet 16" and "Most Expensive Weddings" (plus "Bridezillas"). They glorify excess...have you seen some of the Sweet 16 parties that are thrown?

Skail: I'm all for going to the courthouse with the immediate family, having it done, then throwing a party at a bar/grill.

Of course, having Elvis presiding would complete things...

Yup. Courthouse with my family (there was no way hers could come), lunch with friends and family afterwards.

20 years, still going strong.

TeddyRooseveltsMustache: It's not the ceremony that's important. It's the baby making capabilities. Otherwise there's no point.

No point? No babies here (decided in advance) but there most certainly was a point. Beyond the appearance issue with her family there was the very real issue of her being here on a temporary visa. No wedding = no green card = no way to be together.

humanconditioner

win.

We bought flowers and cupcakes at Sams Club - $40 total on flowers, $10.00 on the cupcakes. My dress was about $75 on Ebay, and the food was BBQ (the farm we were married on had a smoker), at about $12.00 per plate.

The farm rented out for around $1600, but it included quite a bit (horse/carriage, an overnight stay in the HUGE loft after the wedding, etc. etc.). They also allowed us to bring our own beverages for the guests. Much, much better than a fancy wedding - it was more like hanging out with friends and family.

...

I'm 19 and JUST found out from FARK that people expect me to have a $50,000 wedding.

Fark marriage - ain't happening to this fella.

Taila82: I was 17 when I got married, my hubby was 18, and no I was not pregnant. Anyway, we put the entire wedding together for less than $600. My mom made my dress, my friend made my cake, my dad had a photographer friend, and my aunts made the food. We had to pay the most for the flowers and the invitations. It turned out really well, and we were able to start our marriage with no debt. It was great. I'm almost 26 and we're still going strong. Who says you can't marry your high school sweetheart?

That's awesome, I'm actually engaged to my high school sweetheart (been with him almost 7 years) I don't know if we'll be able to get out for $600, but I'm certainly not interested in breaking the bank.

Actually I think HE would prefer a larger, more lavish wedding than I would. Just give me a pretty dress and about 50 guests and I'll be set.

crap...i have no idea how to make someone's name all bold-y.

Stupid Fat Hobbit: Good for them. That's how it should be done.

On the other hand, they are idiots for getting married at that age.

They have a 5 month old. 10 bucks says that was the primary reason.


theorellior: Sorry, subby, a cheap wedding is not and never will be the new hotness. The bridal-industrial complex will see to that.

Unfortunately I think you're right.

~

My biggest pet peeve is people who get their parents to pay for everything, as their "wedding gift" or whatever. I think that's ridiculous. If you're old enough to be getting married, you're old enough to pay for it. My parents (primarily my mom) has told me since I was in my teens that she and my dad will help pay for part of the wedding, but they won't pay for all of it. I told her that's fine and I wouldn't expect her to pay for everything anyways because that's not fair.

Wife and I eloped, took a three week road trip to Yellowstone for our honeymoon, camped all but one night of the trip. If you can survive with your new spouse in a car and tent for three weeks, you can survive anything.

Did a nice BBQ at my parents after we got back, so both families got to get together and hang out. BBQ probably cost $200, tops. Never regreted it a bit, and our families understood once we pointed out our logic.

/Combining Jehovah's Witness, Greek Orthidox Catholic, Roman Catholic, and Buddist wedding requirements would have ended in gunfire
//Plus, spending money on one day crap is foolish
///Married five years now, haven't killed each other yet

"New hotness?" Not hardly. This is an isolated incident.

Trust me: the multi-million-dollar wedding marketing juggernaut that creates bridal magazines the size of phone books, the media's sensational coverage of lavish celebrity weddings, constant waves of little girls raised on Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, and the like... all this will ensure that showy, expensive weddings continue to remain the norm.

(Full disclosure: Our wedding was a modest catered affair, and we were able to pay cash for the whole thing. Our "limousine" was my freshly waxed Toyota.)

Having been to two six figure (£) weddings, neither of which marriages lasted three years, this seems like a great idea. Do it for each other, not to show off the size of daddy's cheque book/credit limit FFS !

Having a luau, I think the total tab is going to be about $3,000 to $4,000. The most expensive things will be renting the friggin' tables, chairs and paying for the leis.

/maybe the liquor too
//marrying into a German family

"Are you going to have (holubsti) at the wedding?" "No, we don't need (holubsti), Mom." "Well, you have to have (holubsti). It's not a wedding without (holubsti)."

Next.

This thread has potential to get hijacked to hilarity (instead of bombarded with bitter stories).

480 quid! who's got kind of bread, man?

back in the diz-ay....