Whew.

Cos I was worried.

Idiots.

It's the same old song about Obama from the polemics:

Repubs: Anti-Christ!
Dems: Superstar!
Repubs: Who are you? What have you sacrificed?

Well that's a relief. Although I had a suspicion that the Caucasus weren't located in Hawaii.

Which, and this just occurred to me, is an interesting angle in the Georgia crisis. McCain is trying to using it to his political advantage to become president. If it works, you could say in a sense that he ascended out of Georgia. Maybe McCain is the Antichrist!

Well, that's a load off of my mind.

They were behind one of the worst video games of all-time.

Well duh. Obama only has nine horns.

Diogenes: Maybe McCain is the Antichrist!

Notice how the authors said nothing about McCain. It's a conspiracy!

Adjective Bird Whiskey: Well duh. Obama only has nine horns.

and 2 heads.

/penis

Too bad, I'm really hoping to see the Apocalypse; sounds like a Michael Bay movie x1000.

Come and collect your flock already, Jesus. We're done with them here.

It still trips me out that these guys sell books. I used to work in a library, and those books would cross my desk SO MANY times, I finally had to crack one open; and I LOVE disaster/end of the world/wrath of god-type stuff. Two pages, and I started getting the dry heaves. Just awful.

Dear Jesus People,
Despite the fact you've clearly convinced yourself otherwise, the world does not revolve around your religious belief system. There are still a lot more people who don't give a damn what your Bible says or how loud you scream it from the pulpit. Shut up.

awfulperson: It still trips me out that these guys sell books. I used to work in a library, and those books would cross my desk SO MANY times, I finally had to crack one open; and I LOVE disaster/end of the world/wrath of god-type stuff. Two pages, and I started getting the dry heaves. Just awful.

I was on a long business trip and forced myself to suffer through them. Just to see what the hubub was, and get an insight about their Eschatology. Thanfully the writing is high school level and I could polish off a book in about 3 hours.

Nestea Plunge: Well that's good news, I guess.

I'll have to check with Kirk Cameron for an expert opinion, however.

You can pry him for the good info if you bring a banana. Or so I've heard.

awfulperson: It still trips me out that these guys sell books. I used to work in a library, and those books would cross my desk SO MANY times, I finally had to crack one open; and I LOVE disaster/end of the world/wrath of god-type stuff. Two pages, and I started getting the dry heaves. Just awful.

I love all that stuff, too. I actually read these books (from the library, I REFUSED to pay for them) and they are just so awefully written! Toward the end, there are even typos and it's like they just stopped caring! There's another, shorter series, that is much better, the Christ Clone Trilogy.

Anyway, now I'm confused. Wouldn't Christians want to vote for the AntiChrist so they can be raptured and see all their friends left behind sentenced to Hell for all eternity?

I have a bad habit where, once I start reading something, I can't stop. Hence, I ended up reading the entire Left Behind series. When the Anti-Christ is the most likeable character in your series, you're doing something terribly wrong.

But while this statement may be silly to us, it may lead to more votes from the superstitious religious far-right so mission accomplished?

no, but he does have an unusually high thetan count

NittLion78: no, but he does have an unusually high thetan count

and midichlorians.

Teela: There's another, shorter series, that is much better, the Christ Clone Trilogy.

There's a decent book called "The Last Day" about Jebus' return.

The strange thing about the whole "left behind" scenario is the Bible doesn't even hint that all the good Christians will go "poof" and leave everyone else behind. It's just not in there.

He's not the Antichrist.
As far as I know.

/channeling Hillary.

Well, people asked them a question and they answered. I fail to see why people are so bent out of shape with them for answering a question.

It's not like they went out of their way to say "Hey, remember us, we don't think Obama is the Anti-Christ."

Zeppo Nightshade: The strange thing about the whole "left behind" scenario is the Bible doesn't even hint that all the good Christians will go "poof" and leave everyone else behind. It's just not in there.

Depends on who you ask. There are plenty of theologians who disagree with you.

/I don't care one way or another

Nestea Plunge: Well that's good news, I guess.

It's not news, it's Fark.

Adman12: Come and collect your flock already, Jesus. We're done with them here.

He did. The rapture was in early 2007; that's why the missing persons rate ticked up. All we're left with now are the damned posers.

Zeppo Nightshade: The strange thing about the whole "left behind" scenario is the Bible doesn't even hint that all the good Christians will go "poof" and leave everyone else behind. It's just not in there.

There's a ton of stuff that Christians believe that has no basis in scripture.

Which is one of the things that stuns me about Protestants. They believe in so much stuff that was just fabricated by the church prior to the Reformation. In essence, many of their beliefs are fruits from the poison tree.

So the writers of a fictional book based loosely on the prophecies in a much older book of mythology is now dealing with the fact that people who believed said older book of mythology are now reading their own book as fact?

I mean, shiat, most of the anti-Christ imagery and conceptions in modern culture come more from Left Behind and The Omen than Revelations. They turned a few strange passages in the trippiest book of the Bible into an entire fictional persona of this dude who's going to destroy the world.

But Obama could be the one-who-was-to-proceed-the-Antichrist, as it was foretold in Revelations. You know, in the part where it said the star would rise before sunset and the 1st seal would be broken. Clearly that's Obama and the broken seal is where he changed his mind on offshore drilling.

WAKE UP!

Bloody William: So the writers of a fictional book based loosely on the prophecies in a much older book of mythology is now dealing with the fact that people who believed said older book of mythology are now reading their own book as fact?

I mean, shiat, most of the anti-Christ imagery and conceptions in modern culture come more from Left Behind and The Omen than Revelations. They turned a few strange passages in the trippiest book of the Bible into an entire fictional persona of this dude who's going to destroy the world.

The thing about the Book of Revelation is that if you were a Christian at the time it was written, all that trippy imagery would make total sense. They referred to the Roman Empire as Babylon, and to the various governors and civil servants who worked in the area of Israel as "whore(s) of Babylon", for example. If you take the Hebrew version of Nero's name, and add up all the numeric values of the letters in his name (come on, you've seen "Pi"), guess what number you end up with. And guess whose picture was on all the money the Roman Empire made you spend.

In short, the basic message of the Book of Revelations is, "OK, it's bad now, the Romans are making us try to fight lions as they watch, but Jesus is going to be back, and we'll kick their ass then." That's pretty much it. I don't think it's actually a book of prophecy, or, in another way to put it, it's a message that's for the Christians of the time in the form of an "apocalypse".

Zeppo Nightshade: The strange thing about the whole "left behind" scenario is the Bible doesn't even hint that all the good Christians will go "poof" and leave everyone else behind. It's just not in there.

Yes it is. Read the new testaments. It says, paraphrased, that you will be working with your brother and he will be gone the next second. He gives other examples, too.

/No longer part of the religion scam

jake_lex: Bloody William: So the writers of a fictional book based loosely on the prophecies in a much older book of mythology is now dealing with the fact that people who believed said older book of mythology are now reading their own book as fact?

I mean, shiat, most of the anti-Christ imagery and conceptions in modern culture come more from Left Behind and The Omen than Revelations. They turned a few strange passages in the trippiest book of the Bible into an entire fictional persona of this dude who's going to destroy the world.

The thing about the Book of Revelation is that if you were a Christian at the time it was written, all that trippy imagery would make total sense. They referred to the Roman Empire as Babylon, and to the various governors and civil servants who worked in the area of Israel as "whore(s) of Babylon", for example. If you take the Hebrew version of Nero's name, and add up all the numeric values of the letters in his name (come on, you've seen "Pi"), guess what number you end up with. And guess whose picture was on all the money the Roman Empire made you spend.

In short, the basic message of the Book of Revelations is, "OK, it's bad now, the Romans are making us try to fight lions as they watch, but Jesus is going to be back, and we'll kick their ass then." That's pretty much it. I don't think it's actually a book of prophecy, or, in another way to put it, it's a message that's for the Christians of the time in the form of an "apocalypse".

Well, yes. In the context of the time in which it was written, Revelations was a diatribe against Rome, foretelling its fall. The people who think it's a valid blueprint of the end of the world two thousand years later know less about their own Bible than this heretic.

Zeppo Nightshade: The strange thing about the whole "left behind" scenario is the Bible doesn't even hint that all the good Christians will go "poof" and leave everyone else behind. It's just not in there.


Actually, I think the idea comes from here:

Matthew 24:40 Then shall two be in the field; the one shall be taken, and the other left.
Matthew 24:41 Two women shall be grinding at the mill; the one shall be taken, and the other left.

Luke 17:34 I tell you, in that night there shall be two men in one bed; the one shall be taken, and the other shall be left.

The Luke quote is just crazy! Not all versions of the bible have the word "men" in there, but the KJV sure does. So does this mean that some homosexuals will be left behind, while the other homosexuals experience the Rapture?

Christians need to get their stories straight.

Our Man in Nirvana: Zeppo Nightshade: The strange thing about the whole "left behind" scenario is the Bible doesn't even hint that all the good Christians will go "poof" and leave everyone else behind. It's just not in there.


Actually, I think the idea comes from here:

Matthew 24:40 Then shall two be in the field; the one shall be taken, and the other left.
Matthew 24:41 Two women shall be grinding at the mill; the one shall be taken, and the other left.

Luke 17:34 I tell you, in that night there shall be two men in one bed; the one shall be taken, and the other shall be left.

The Luke quote is just crazy! Not all versions of the bible have the word "men" in there, but the KJV sure does. So does this mean that some homosexuals will be left behind, while the other homosexuals experience the Rapture?

Christians need to get their stories straight.

So don't drive behind car's with rainbow bumper stickers?

Isn't the Antichrist supposed to be able to take in the faithful hook, line, and sinker? He's supposed to get all of the true believers behind him thinking he's "the one"

By that definition, wouldn't our current leader qualify more for the role?

awfulperson: It still trips me out that these guys sell books. I used to work in a library, and those books would cross my desk SO MANY times, I finally had to crack one open; and I LOVE disaster/end of the world/wrath of god-type stuff. Two pages, and I started getting the dry heaves. Just awful.

Slacktivist's Critique of Left Behind

The books are miserably bad, but the criticism is absolutely brilliant and well written. I highly recommend it.

Also, Fred Clark addressed the "Obama is the Antichrist" thing in another blog post.

Our Man in Nirvana: Zeppo Nightshade: The strange thing about the whole "left behind" scenario is the Bible doesn't even hint that all the good Christians will go "poof" and leave everyone else behind. It's just not in there.


Actually, I think the idea comes from here:

Matthew 24:40 Then shall two be in the field; the one shall be taken, and the other left.
Matthew 24:41 Two women shall be grinding at the mill; the one shall be taken, and the other left.

Luke 17:34 I tell you, in that night there shall be two men in one bed; the one shall be taken, and the other shall be left.

The Luke quote is just crazy! Not all versions of the bible have the word "men" in there, but the KJV sure does. So does this mean that some homosexuals will be left behind, while the other homosexuals experience the Rapture?

Christians need to get their stories straight.

Thanks for providing specifics to my response above. I didn't have the desire to do his homework for him.

Zxaranthium: Our Man in Nirvana: Zeppo Nightshade: The strange thing about the whole "left behind" scenario is the Bible doesn't even hint that all the good Christians will go "poof" and leave everyone else behind. It's just not in there.

Luke 17:34 I tell you, in that night there shall be two men in one bed; the one shall be taken, and the other shall be left.

The Luke quote is just crazy! Not all versions of the bible have the word "men" in there, but the KJV sure does. So does this mean that some homosexuals will be left behind, while the other homosexuals experience the Rapture?

Christians need to get their stories straight.

Thanks for providing specifics to my response above. I didn't have the desire to do his homework for him.

I have never seen that Luke quote before with the word 'men'! That is awesome! I will definitely be bringing that up at the next family dinner with the folks. There's also a verse, maybe in Thes. about being 'caught up' in the air.
I grew up with all of this end times stuff. And the thing that gets me is, if Revelations is a prophesy of the last days, why isn't it mentioned that a significant portion of the population is gone? Wouldn't Revelations be a great place to mention the Rapture?
Of course that's not the only thing that gets me about it, but it'll do for starters.

SphericalTime:
Slacktivist's Critique of Left Behind

The books are miserably bad, but the criticism is absolutely brilliant and well written. I highly recommend it.

Also, Fred Clark addressed the "Obama is the Antichrist" thing in another blog post.

This. The entire 1st book is about people making phone calls and behaving in ways that make absolutely no sense to the reader.

This is good to hear, again!

Like I said in a previous thread, the Antichrist will be the complete opposite of the Christ. Can't be Anti- any other way.

With that having been said, Jesus was a man. Therefore, the Anti-christ would have to be:

It's pretty farking stupid to be making that call before the motherfarker has any power.

DslainteC: It's the same old song about Obama from the polemics:

Repubs: Anti-Christ!
Dems: Superstar!
Repubs: Who are you? What have you sacrificed?

Nice!
I'd like to see all the lyrics.

You could do a pretty nice mapping of that musical to our current politics. NAACP = the Pharisees (and it even rhymes!), etc.

And, yes, he is going to win.
Obama/Kerry will win.
You heard it here first.
Short the market appropriately.
The antichrist wants those left behind to
at least have a decent short position in
the market. That is all.

subby: Truly, their wisdom is a gift to us all

Are you using this in the same sense that "gifted" is being used one thread down?

Please, someone PS a "Gifted" Anti-Christ :)

Teela: awfulperson: It still trips me out that these guys sell books. I used to work in a library, and those books would cross my desk SO MANY times, I finally had to crack one open; and I LOVE disaster/end of the world/wrath of god-type stuff. Two pages, and I started getting the dry heaves. Just awful.

I love all that stuff, too. I actually read these books (from the library, I REFUSED to pay for them) and they are just so awefully written! Toward the end, there are even typos and it's like they just stopped caring! There's another, shorter series, that is much better, the Christ Clone Trilogy.

Anyway, now I'm confused. Wouldn't Christians want to vote for the AntiChrist so they can be raptured and see all their friends left behind sentenced to Hell for all eternity?

I've never read these books, but a friend of mine read one and he said that every time the protagonist is in danger he gets saved through some sort of miracle. He said after the 4th or 5th time this happened it sapped all of the suspense out of the rest of the book and just made it boring.

"Antichrist fatigue"???? Seriously??? That's GOTTA be a Googlewhack...

(goes off to check)

Damn. Not even close.

Look. Take the Letters in Obama's name

O B A M A

Convert them into corresponding Alphanumeric phone equivalents

62262

6 2+2+2 6

666

not obvious enough huh?

A vote for Obama is like a phone call to Satan libtards.

Sad part is, the books were a really good read...

I'm being raptured september 14th, so i'm getting a big kick out of this discussion.

Well, they are GIFTED after all.