Yeah, for old people, "life in prison" isn't that threatening of a punishment.

Their life is already like a prison.

Once, his staff sent him an indictment at 10am on friday, and he only received it on tuesday.

His nickname in the joint is going to be "A series of tubes".

Senator Stevens. A Colon to Nowhere.

Isn't one of the stages toward accepting your eventual imprisonment is denial?

/PMITA prison, terminal disease, what's the difference?

An indictment is not something you can just dump a felony onto...it's a series of misdemeanors...

or something.

Etchy333: Yeah, for old people, "life in prison" isn't that threatening of a punishment.

Their life is already like a prison.

OK, how about this. In prison, feed them a low fiber diet. He'll be begging for someone to smuggle him in a can of prune juice.

Senator Stevens not worried about his Depends...and the bridge to nowhere.

Etchy333: Yeah, for old people, "life in prison" isn't that threatening of a punishment.

Their life is already like a prison.

On the other hand, a 5 year sentence probably means a lot more when you're old.

Atillathepun: His nickname in the joint is going to be "A series of tubes".

Senator Stevens. A Colon to Nowhere.

I salute you for actually identifying him by his significant policy actions rather than his relatively accurate metaphor for electronic communication.

Also, I must salute subby. Well done, sir, very clever.

Atillathepun: His nickname in the joint is going to be "A series of tubes".

Yeouch. That's brutal.

I hope nobody here honestly thinks someone this high up on the political food chain will go to a PMITA prison. Just doesn't happen. Minimum security facility at best. Home imprisonment or parole more likely, if he doesn't weasel out completely somehow.

Jim_Callahan: I salute you for actually identifying him by his significant policy actions rather than his relatively accurate metaphor for electronic communication.

"A series of tubes" is hardly accurate.

"They like to bugger vast amounts of inmates in prison. And again, prison is not something that you just dump someone in. It's not a big old people's home. It's a series of anal rapes. And if you don't understand, those anuses can be filled and if they are filled, when you put your tallywhacker in, it gets in line and it's going to be delayed by anyone that puts into that anus enormous amounts of material, enormous amounts of material."

/got nothing

The Icelander: "A series of tubes" is hardly accurate.

Do I really have to explain it? *sigh*

Just imagine a tube network where the little bottle things get divided up into tiny slices and mixed around, some possibly even being sent through different tubes entirely before being put back together at the far end. Oh, and the stuff in the tubes travels at a significant fraction of the speed of light, and the route a package fragment takes through the tubes is determined on-the-fly by mechanical men at substations who read the destination address and compare that against a mental table (which they update in real time) giving them estimations of how quickly each of their available tubes could get the package fragment to its destination. Also, pneumatic physics magically don't apply, so new package fragments can be added and sent while other fragments are still in transit further down the same tube.

It's a straightforward metaphor, I don't know what your problem is.

I thought the headline was kinda funny... until I RTFA and noticed that it is kinda what he said!

SpaceButler: The Icelander: "A series of tubes" is hardly accurate.

Do I really have to explain it? *sigh*

Just imagine a tube network where the little bottle things get divided up into tiny slices and mixed around, some possibly even being sent through different tubes entirely before being put back together at the far end. Oh, and the stuff in the tubes travels at a significant fraction of the speed of light, and the route a package fragment takes through the tubes is determined on-the-fly by mechanical men at substations who read the destination address and compare that against a mental table (which they update in real time) giving them estimations of how quickly each of their available tubes could get the package fragment to its destination. Also, pneumatic physics magically don't apply, so new package fragments can be added and sent while other fragments are still in transit further down the same tube.

It's a straightforward metaphor, I don't know what your problem is.

Well, for starters, it's not a series of tubes at all, it's a parallel network of tubes.

The Icelander: "A series of tubes" is hardly accurate.

not bad for a man who grew up during the age of radio.

and wikipedia agrees, you partisan hack.

captain_napalm: The Icelander: "A series of tubes" is hardly accurate.

not bad for a man who grew up during the age of radio.

and wikipedia agrees, you partisan hack.

"...an Internet was sent by my staff at 10 o'clock in the morning on Friday..." - Ted Stevens

Generally accurate or not - still makes for some damn funny quotes.

This is just the first step in the series of conservative irrelevance. The next thing he has to do is defend lawbreaking. "It's GOOD to commit felonies."

SpaceButler:

Good morning, Senator.

captain_napalm: not bad for a man who grew up during the age of radio.

Very bad for a man charged with determining legislation about it.

Now that's a wide stance.

Honestly, is there anything as stupid-sounding as what politicians say when they get in serious legal trouble? Democrats are bad enough (what the "meaning of is is") but for true stupidity you need a Republican.

AntiNerd: Now that's a wide stance.

Honestly, is there anything as stupid-sounding as what politicians say when they get in serious legal trouble? Democrats are bad enough (what the "meaning of is is") but for true stupidity you need a Republican.

Nah, nothing yet has beaten "I didn't inhale." as the all-time ludicrous cop-out.

captain_napalm: The Icelander: "A series of tubes" is hardly accurate.

not bad for a man who grew up during the age of radio.

and wikipedia agrees, you partisan hack.

The Icelander: captain_napalm: not bad for a man who grew up during the age of radio.

Very bad for a man charged with determining legislation about it.

The Icelander: Jim_Callahan: I salute you for actually identifying him by his significant policy actions rather than his relatively accurate metaphor for electronic communication.

"A series of tubes" is hardly accurate.

Considering that he was essentially talking about increased flow of information resulting in increased resistance to the flow, and that's more or less how fluid in pipes functions, actually it was pretty good. Perhaps your resistance to the metaphor has more to do with a lack of knowledge of piping design rather than a significant understanding of the internet?

since when are politicians not above the law?

Hey Ted, maybe you'll get lucky and end up sharing a cell with your buddy Duke Cunningham.