If I had to venture a guess, I'd say that this man wasn't well-bread.


Also, from the article: "at his request the sandwiches were thrown away."

What a bunch of baloney.

/HEY-OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

This us a sammich emergency, dammit!

This is a sammich emergency, dammit!

FTFM

Anaxphone: This is a sammich emergency, dammit!

FTFM

I liked it better the other way.

I would like to respond to these rash of articles by saying a man getting arrested for calling 911 should not longer be grounds for a green light.

Good! farking asshole should be arrested.

My mate once responded to a 911 call that turned out to be an old man who ran out of vodka and wanted the firemen to bring him more.

Getting stuck on toilets and in tubs is common too.

Lettuce pray for this man who mustard up the...the...wait, I'll find a pun somewhere.

They should make jackasses like this pay a fine for wasting the dispatcher's time. That would help offset salaries.

Anaxphone: This is a sammich emergency, dammit!

FTFM

Everybody knows the police only respond to donut emergencies.

Sun God: Lettuce pray for this man who mustard up the...the...wait, I'll find a pun somewhere.

I will relish your final answer.

So he's single?

We're fearless flying hotdogs,
the famous "Unflappable Five,"
we're mustered in formation
to climb, to dip, to dive,
we spread our wings with relish,
then reach for altitude,
we're aerobic weiners,
the fastest flying food.

We're fearless flying hotdogs,
we race with flair and style,
then catch up with each other
and soar in single file,
you never saw such daring,
such power and control,
as when we swoop and spiral,
then slide into a roll.

The throngs applaud our antics,
they cheer us long and loud,
there's never a chilly reception,
there's never a sour crowd,
and if we may speak frankly,
we are a thrilling sight,
we're fearless flying hotdogs,
the delicate essence of flight.

-Jack Prelutsky

Skawt: Sun God: Lettuce pray for this man who mustard up the...the...wait, I'll find a pun somewhere.

I will relish your final answer.

I'm all out of buns.

Bonanza Jellybean

To be frank, it's not a weiner.

That Jared got so finicky after he lost those last five pounds. Let's bring the jolly fat man back.

Anaxphone: This us a sammich emergency, dammit!

Zing

No Coke. Pepsi.

That's not how you make me sammiches!

Oscar?

Sun God
Skawt: Sun God: Lettuce pray for this man who mustard up the...the...wait, I'll find a pun somewhere.

I will relish your final answer.

I'm all out of buns.

And the rest of us are just trying to play ketchup.

I understand he'll be spending some time rehabilitating at the Mayo Clinic.

I've been to Subway in Jacksonville before and have to admit this is quite frequently how they treat their customers. It's sloppy work as usual, and if you complain they refuse to do anything about it. Locking Mr. Peterson out of the store seems a bit far, but not untypical of their level of service; rather than make him another fresh sandwich, they go to extraordinary lengths to avoid satisfying the customer.

Cheers to Mr. Peterson for alerting the authorities, but obviously Jacksonville's finest were in bed with Subway's owners and as such refused to do their job. Hero tag off today?

CanisNoir: I understand he'll be spending some time rehabilitating at the Mayo Clinic.

Those plans got put on hold, according to his calendar, which says "hold the Mayo".

All the Subways I've been to, they make the sandwich right in front of you. Was this dope not paying attention?

/my guess: drunk, on a cell phone, or both

I wonder if he's any relation to the Western Barbeque Burger woman.

Hero?



Was this the guy?, Looks a little squirrely.

Sun God: Skawt: Sun God: Lettuce pray for this man who mustard up the...the...wait, I'll find a pun somewhere.

I will relish your final answer.

I'm all out of buns.
I'm so lost without you
I know you were right
Thin-slicing for so long

//ouch

Bathia_Mapes: I wonder if he's any relation to the Western Barbeque Burger woman.

A saucy wench.

wow. somebody in FL gets something right!

I have worked at Subway. This does not surprise me one bit. Kudos to the Subway employees. THEY deserve the Hero tag.

Lots43: I have worked at Subway. This does not surprise me one bit. Kudos to the Subway employees. THEY deserve the Hero tag.

You'll have to find the Hero tag hidden somewhere in all that lettuce everybody's been praying with.

Uh, how the fark hard is it to make a farking sandwich? Seriously. If you don't want to make sandwiches, and make them how the person paying for them wants them, you should probably not be a 'sandwich artist'. I mean, for reals. The dude is supposed to pay for the sandwiches, right? I mean, he ain't getting them free, right? So why should he pay for sandwiches that he didn't order? I'm sure all of you would have no problem driving a Jetta even though you ordered (and paid for) a Ferrari, right? Because you shouldn't get what you want when you're buying something, apparently. Apparently, the customer is always an asshole.

An event like this happened two years ago: Lady calls 911 over wrong Burger King order

Also: Woman Calls 911 To Request Babysitter

I'm sure Jack Nicholson approves.

From "FIVE EASY PIECES"

Bobby (Jack) tries to order breakfast in a diner:

Bobby: I'd like a plain omelet no potatoes tomatoes instead, a cup of coffee and wheat toast.

Waitress: No substitutions.

Bob: What do you mean? You don't have any tomatoes?

Waitress: Only what's on the menu. You can have a #2, plain omelet, comes with cottage fries and rolls.

Bobby: I know what it comes with but it's not what I want.

Waitress: I'll come back when you make up your mind.

Bobby: Wait a minute, I have made up my mind. I'd like an plain omelet, no potatoes on the plate, a cup of coffee and a side order of wheat toast.

Waitress: I'm sorry, we don't have any side orders of toast. It's a muffin or a coffee roll.

Bobby: What do you mean you don't make side orders of toast. You make sandwiches don't you?

Waitress: Would you like to talk to the manager?

Bobby: You've got bread and a toaster of some kind?

Waitress: I don't make the rules.

Bobby: Okay, I'll make it as easy for you as I can. I'd like an omelet plain and a chicken salad sandwich on wheat toast, no mayonnaise, no butter, no lettuce. And a cup of coffee.

Waitress : A #2, chicken salad sand. Hold the butter, the lettuce, the mayonnaise, and a cup of coffee. Anything else?

Bobby: Yeah, now all you have to do is hold the chicken, bring me the toast, give me a check for the chicken salad sandwich, and you haven't broken any rules.

Waitress: You want me to hold the chicken, huh?

Bobby: I want you to hold it between your knees.

/loves this scene

Thanks, zamboni, I almost forgot I had that video.

/I believe I have that courtesy of a boobies link back from when Fark had those kinds of things

Don't people know about 311?

Subway sucks, whatever marketing ploy they have going the ingredients are obviously just as cheap and toxic as the stuff that goes into a McDonald's.

/In the UK, at least. No wonder we've a bad reputation for food when the high streets are full of these atrocious attempts at cuisine.
//Maximize profit, minimize service/costs.

Now, that's a guy that needs to be tasered 19 times.

ChuckyV: Now, that's a guy that needs to be tasered 19 times.

Finally, a sandwich toasted to perfection!

zamboni: Hero?



Was this the guy?, Looks a little squirrely.

Isn't she masturbating in that sandwich shop?

Okay, it wasn't a 911 call, but back in the day, some friends of mine and me were smoking some weed and it made us feel kinda wierd.

So my buddy calls the police and asks him if there was a way to tell if the weed had been sprayed with paraquat.

The cops said, "Well, why don't you just bring it in and we'll take a look?"

We talked him out of it.

They need to make a copy of the non-emergency 911 call for the police, email the audio file directly to the local courthouse for storage, go to the location of the caller, play back the audio file of the 911 call to the location, and then be legally allowed to ask the owner of the establishment (if a business or for private homes the police will play back the 911 call on a bullhorn to the local residents), if they would prefer the jackass just be arrested or just given a severe beatdown.

Multiple non-emergency non-police 911 "Emergency Calls" in one day automatically ensures the above plus a beatdown with arrest.

Gridlock: They need to make a copy of the non-emergency 911 call for the police, email the audio file directly to the local courthouse for storage, go to the location of the caller, play back the audio file of the 911 call to the location, and then be legally allowed to ask the owner of the establishment (if a business or for private homes the police will play back the 911 call on a bullhorn to the local residents), if they would prefer the jackass just be arrested or just given a severe beatdown.


Being this guy is both in Florida, and an epic biatch, I'm going to assume he's old. Bitter, complaining old people live together typically in communal neighborhoods where their children stick them hoping they'll get into a golf-cart accident and die.

I can just picture the cops playing that call back to a crowd of blue-hairs. You'd have thirty old-people shaking their canes and yelling "Well... is he gonna' get his sandwich?!"

They fark you at the walk-up, okay? They fark you at the walk-up!

I don't see the problem. This is exactly what the Founding Fathers had in mind when they invented the 911 system.

"They know you're gonna be miles away before you find out you got farked!"

untaken_name: Uh, how the fark hard is it to make a farking sandwich? Seriously. If you don't want to make sandwiches, and make them how the person paying for them wants them, you should probably not be a 'sandwich artist'. I mean, for reals. The dude is supposed to pay for the sandwiches, right? I mean, he ain't getting them free, right? So why should he pay for sandwiches that he didn't order? I'm sure all of you would have no problem driving a Jetta even though you ordered (and paid for) a Ferrari, right? Because you shouldn't get what you want when you're buying something, apparently. Apparently, the customer is always an asshole.

Can't see that the story is telling it all or there would be a tazering included, the number of times he was hit, which hospital he was taken to and the time of death... Also, that the police were justified in the murder because the man raised his voice, or was sitting or laying down unconscious 'in a threatening manner'.

WWJD?

What would Jared do...
/got nothing.