FTFA "And so the Child told his disciples to fetch some food but all they had was five loaves and a couple of frankfurters. So he took the bread and the frankfurters and blessed them and told his disciples to feed the multitudes. And when all had eaten their fill, the scraps filled twelve baskets."

I hear he did this with beer and brats in Wisconsin once, too.

In the great Battles of Caucus and Primary he smote the conniving Hillary, wife of the deposed King Bill the Priapic and their barbarian hordes of Working Class Whites.

*snert*

Amusing. Probably blasphemous, but amusing

stargazer101: Probably blasphemous, but amusing

Blasphemous? That article was good enough for Jehovah...

Nice work Gerard Baker.

"The Great Prophet Algore of Nobel and Oscar, who many had believed was the anointed one, smiled and told his followers that the Child was the one generations had been waiting for."

That's some quality smack. +1

Well that was the smelliest piece of shiat I've seen in some time.

Funny stuff.

bwhwwhahahhaa.

I like the "tribe of the Media" read it as May-deee-aa. I think that corresponds to a city, a rather famous one in the bible?

I don't know if I should laugh or be outraged?

This is awesome.

Blessed is he who heralds with much rejoicing the arrival of The Messiah. (Gospel of Chris Matthews 25:5)

lol, that was pretty funny.

/Cue McCain saying "ooh ooh, do me too!!"

Satan_Sunburn: Well that was the smelliest piece of shiat I've seen in some time.

Yeah, I guess everyone hasn't gotten the memo that making fun of Senator Obama is strictly off-limits. This article is obviously racist.

Satan_Sunburn: Well that was the smelliest piece of shiat I've seen in some time.

I would be more willing to go for the "WTF" angle. The concept is kinda funny, but it got old after a while.

Satan_Sunburn: Well that was the smelliest piece of shiat I've seen in some time.

Cry havoc and let slip the chin-stroking dogs of humorlessness!

gerard baker,

Two Dogs Farking: Blasphemous? That article was good enough for Jehovah...

you're only making it worse for yourself!!

/i can't tell if that article was satire or serious, though.

Two Dogs Farking: Blasphemous? That article was good enough for Jehovah...

I'm warning you, if you say Jehovah one more time *BONK*... Right! Who threw that?

Satan_Sunburn: Well that was the smelliest piece of shiat I've seen in some time.

Lighten up dude. It was meant to be funny. I'm a Obamaniac and I laughed my ass off. I"m sure Obama would have too.

f00f: /i can't tell if that article was satire or serious, though.

here's a hint:
if obama actually rode into israel on a donkey, it was serious. otherwise, it's satire.

blessed are the cheesemakers

Article makes me want to vote for McCain.

And lo the funny was lost upon the umteenth paragraph and so the deciples deserted.

You know, some day you libs will understand that President Bush has done the best he can under impossible odds. Someone had to put that mad dog Saddam down, and we all know Clinton didn't have the balls to do it. After he attacked us, there was no more time to wait.

History will redeem him, even if some of you will rage against the truth.

That's some good stuff right there.

/voting for Obama again in Novemeber

That was the most beautifully thorough piece of satire. And if you're outraged, protip- you might be the cult following it's insulting.

what_now: After he attacked us,

wut?!?!?!

_{/unless you are refering to firing on US planes in the no-fly zone}

EriksMom: Satan_Sunburn: Well that was the smelliest piece of shiat I've seen in some time.

Lighten up dude. It was meant to be funny. I'm a Obamaniac and I laughed my ass off. I"m sure Obama would have too.

Obama is an angry black man. He doesn't laugh.

And with that, a mighty cheer went up from the heroes of Shelbyville. They had banished the awful lemon tree forever, because it was haunted. Now let's all celebrate with a cool glass of turnip juice.

/first thing the title brought to mind
/coffee time

what_now: You know, some day you libs will understand that President Bush has done the best he can under impossible odds. Someone had to put that mad dog Saddam down, and we all know Clinton didn't have the balls to do it. After he attacked us, there was no more time to wait.

History will redeem him, even if some of you will rage against the truth.

Ehhh.. 1/10. Half hearted, and "The Saddam atatcked us" part was just all kinds of fail.

Dang, I just snorted milk out my nose because of that article.

And I wasn't even drinking milk!

Sad thing is, people really DO think Obama is the second coming of Jesus.

McCain is so farked.

/as is the country
//No we can't

Can't say it any better than McCain's spokesman, Tucker Bounds:

"John McCain has dedicated his life to serving, improving and protecting America. Barack Obama spent an afternoon talking about it."

Possibly the most lightweight, accomplishment-free, unvetted candidate in U.S. history, versus a war hero with decades of public experience, national security experience and proven, demonstrated ability to work with the other side of the aisle, even when it took courage, was unpopular and pissed off his own party.

And in light of those facts, who do the libiots choose? Option A, and to call Option B "a third Bush term."

You ought to be embarrassed.

I don't know. It was OK I guess. I thought it went a little long and could have been a bit more succinct. Maybe I'm just not in the mood for this sort of shiat this early in the day. I'll read it again at quitting time and see if I laugh then.

f00f: Two Dogs Farking: Blasphemous? That article was good enough for Jehovah...

you're only making it worse for yourself!!

/i can't tell if that article was satire or serious, though.

maybe it's: BOTH!

only political fundamentalists will take it literally, which is subtle, yet important, distinction.

what_now: You know, some day you libs will understand that President Bush has done the best he can under impossible odds. Someone had to put that mad dog Saddam down, and we all know Clinton didn't have the balls to do it. After he attacked us, there was no more time to wait.

History will redeem him, even if some of you will rage against the truth.

8/10. extra points for ripping Clinton and saying Saddam attacked us in the same paragraph.

This particular attack isn't quite as effective as the purple heart band aids..

people like him too much! so uh, don't like him!

It was a funny article though....

Satan_Sunburn: Well that was the smelliest piece of shiat I've seen in some time.

Take a look in the mirror now and then.

mr lawson: wut?!?!?!

/unless you are refering to firing on US planes in the no-fly zone

people usually seem to forget he attacked on a pretty damn regular basis.

what_now: After he attacked us

Say what now, when did Saddam attack the US? Saddam has attacked many countries (with US backing at that) but has never attacked the US.

0/10

MasterThief: Two Dogs Farking: Blasphemous? That article was good enough for Jehovah...

I'm warning you, if you say Jehovah one more time *BONK*... Right! Who threw that?

*High Pitched Voices*

SHE DID, SHE DID!!!

*Voices get deeper*

HE DID, HE DID!!!

what_now: You know, some day you libs will understand that President Bush has done the best he can under impossible odds. Someone had to put that mad dog Saddam down, and we all know Clinton didn't have the balls to do it. After he attacked us, there was no more time to wait.

History will redeem him, even if some of you will rage against the truth.

sorry, I just wet my pants reading that.

/anyone got a paper towel?
//you are an idiot
///k thnks bai

Now you listen here. He's not the messiah, he's a very naughty boy! Now go
away!

Having been recently struck on my way to Dumbasscus and converted I found that sufficiently reverential.

AND HOW CAN THIS BE??!!??!?

For he is the Kwitzatz Hadbarack!

James Buchanan was the most experienced man we ever had as President.

/minor threadjack

What's the url for that awesome polling site that people quote here all the time. It's some numbers, that I can't farkin remember or find on google.

Thanks.

/minor threadjack off.

Aseran: Dang, I just snorted milk out my nose because of that article.

And I wasn't even drinking milk!

That made me laugh.

FishingWithFredo: Possibly the most lightweight, accomplishment-free, unvetted candidate in U.S. history

but he's different! and black. and articulate. so he must be better.

we're human. we get overly excited. heck, even i'm eager to see what happens--because the new and different is fun and exciting.