These poor drug addicts. The dealer has them hooked and now the dealer is trying to take their fix away. The government should step in and ban this dangerous product for the public good.

/sarcasm

Crosshair: The government should step in and ban this dangerous product for the public good.

Legalize it!

/Oh...Never mind...

Crosshair: These poor drug addicts. The dealer has them hooked and now the dealer is trying to take their fix away. The government should step in and ban this dangerous product for the public good.

What is more tragic is that they have lost all will to go to the Starbucks across the street. Please, we need money to help these people.

"Now that it's going away, we're devastated," said Kate Walker, a facilities manager for software company SunGard Financial Systems who recently learned of a store closing in New York City.

Devastated? Really?
I'd hate to see how she'd react if she got ass cancer.

This is the sort of thing that happens when a single mega-corporation is allowed to hold a monopoly on such a popular, tasty beverage.

Oh, wait. Nevermind.

You're trying way too hard smitty.

Time to switch to coke.

flashfry: You're trying way too hard smitty.

And the people quoted in the article aren't trying hard enough.

If I happen to stop in Starbucks on the walk to work it's always full of people's assistants/the office slave with a long list of orders like low-fat soy latte with a double shot and whipped cream. farking ridiculous.

shanrick: "Devastated? Really?
I'd hate to see how she'd react if she got ass cancer.

She probably would not mind as long as she could have her triple non-fat fruffalatte.

For many years, I bought a cup o' Joe at either 7-11 or AP/PM. Less than a buck, all the fixings, taste just fine. Besides, I really just wanted the caffeine.

Starbucks and their ilk are just a poor substitute for booze and the neighborhood bar.

"Knowing Starbucks, there's probably [another] one within a few blocks," she said. "But that's probably two blocks too far."

God I hate fat America.

Oh and

Online, several "Save Our Starbucks" petitions have popped up for stores across the country, including locations in San Diego, Dallas and New York City.

and with that I'm going to post a picture of starving child in Darfur. Think about that the next time you farking cry about an overpriced coffee house getting closed you human pieces of apathy.



/pissed and disgusted

Let me just say...

Wooo. It's like a drug. Wearing these glasses drinking this coffee gets you high, but you come down hard.

/not that obscure

Good, close them all down. Maybe people will start frequenting local business instead of overpriced cookie cutter chain stores.

Smitty tried way too hard.

seminole87: The starving child in Darfur can go fark himself.

Schadenfreude FTW!

/see you at baggage claim

This makes me sad. It's now gonna be that much harder to spot douchebags.

Death by Misadventure: and with that I'm going to post a picture of starving child in Darfur.

So the white man should go back and straighten things out again? Looks like that independence thing didn't work out so well.

Foreign aid is doing Africa more harm than good. Propping up despot leaders and screwing up the local economy.

Crosshair: These poor drug addicts.

Amen. It's disgraceful how women in the street offer to blow me if I'll take them to Starbucks.

Death by Misadventure: and with that I'm going to post a picture of starving child in Darfur. Think about that the next time you farking cry about an overpriced coffee house getting closed you human pieces of apathy.

What I never understood was why all those starving children don't swat the flies away from their face. DUDE! You've got FLIES on your face! Doesn't that BUG you!?

/Man, that shiite tickles

America:

The more you piss and whine about stuff, the more successful you are.

Or is it the other way around?

I feel bad that the yuppies won't have a place to buy their overroasted coffee bean drinks. Dunkin' Donuts rules!!! And buy some Munchkins.

Crosshair: Death by Misadventure: and with that I'm going to post a picture of starving child in Darfur.

So the white man should go back and straighten things out again? Looks like that independence thing didn't work out so well.

Foreign aid is doing Africa more harm than good. Propping up despot leaders and screwing up the local economy.

If you saw 60 minutes tonight, apparently the Bush Admin. is helping prop up Sudanese Govt.

IdahoPrime: Starbuck's is for pretentious twats.

/double stamped

I hardly ever go into Starbucks, so it wasn't until just recently that I learned that Starbucks is where kids go once they've been kicked out of their parent's basement. Where will all these homeless folks go?

If they're displeased by the actions of Starbucks, they should boycott them!

/Yes, that'll show them.
//Wouldn't be the first time idiots did that to protest a company leaving.

NeuroticMan: Death by Misadventure: and with that I'm going to post a picture of starving child in Darfur. Think about that the next time you farking cry about an overpriced coffee house getting closed you human pieces of apathy.

What I never understood was why all those starving children don't swat the flies away from their face. DUDE! You've got FLIES on your face! Doesn't that BUG you!?

/Man, that shiite tickles

Perhaps more perplexing is the question, why don't they just eat the flies. Two birds with one stone.

I gotta see them folks that's gone out on the road. I got a feelin' I got to see them. They gonna need help no preachin' can give 'em. Hope of heaven when their lives ain't lived? Holy Spirit when their own spirit is downcast an' sad?

/better not be obscure

IdahoPrime: +


Starbuck's is for pretentious twats.

I got that coffee maker.

And I gota admit, it makes really terrible coffee. It never heats the water to the point where it does anything other than pester the coffee a bit.

Looking for a used Bunn on ebay.

IdahoPrime: Starbuck's is for pretentious twats.

What about people who make their own espresso drinks at home and remind everyone at ... uh... every opportunity.

/goes to make some coffee

Crosshair: These poor drug addicts. The dealer has them hooked and now the dealer is trying to take their fix away. The government should step in and ban this dangerous product for the public good.

/sarcasm

this.

Maybe it's some west coast thing, but ever since moving to the Seattle area, I've noticed that not only do they drink a lot of coffee, they also add Red Bull, Monster, etc. to it. Good farking god, heart attack in a cup! fark heroin, Seattle's farking drug of choice is caffeine.

Robo Beat:
Perhaps more perplexing is the question, why don't they just eat the flies. Two birds with one stone.

You win.

Heamer: Time to switch to coke.

Let's just make sure that they don't do it wrong like this:



You should at least use a straw.....



Cakeboy: This makes me sad. It's now gonna be that much harder to spot douchebags.

Unfortunately, that will also be one thing that I will miss about it. Thankfully, there are many other good ways to spot them.

Don't drink caffine...hurts my stomach

seriously...hurts

I dropped Starbucks, then I dropped Tims. Now I make my own better coffee for much less and at my own convenience. I also don't have to wait like a douchebag in an idling car for 20 minutes at the tims drive through.

Does not approve

/Oh wait nevermind

SMOKE MORE CRACK

seminole87:

The starving child in Darfur can go fark himself.

If there is one cognitive bias that Farkers suffer from more than others it is Reactance (new window).

You tell them not to eat animals because animals feel pain, and they post images conveying their intention to eat three times as many as before or three times as many as the petitioner doesn't it.

You tell them to ditch machismo and act like sensible rational adults, and you get a thread full of bitter hateful responses, and accomplish nothing more than to further inculcate them in their views and attitudes.

You tell them to have compassion for a starving African child and they say "The starving child in Darfur can go fark himself."


Farkers are some of the most willful, egotistical, and intransigent people I have ever encountered. It's a shame they can be funny and insightful at times; otherwise I'd be able to get my farking ass the hell out of this place.

"Knowing Starbucks, there's probably [another] one within a few blocks," she said. "But that's probably two blocks too far."

YHGTBFKM...

Where do they find priceless quotes like this?? And where do they find the steamy piles of crap that says them??

mepiget: Farkers are some of the most willful, egotistical, and intransigent people I have ever encountered.

Welcome to Fark..Sit down and have some coffee beer...

Why can't they just go to McDonalds, buy milkshakes and pop'em in the microwave for a minute?

Same farking thing!

mepiget: If there is one cognitive bias that Farkers suffer from more than others it is Reactance (new window).

You tell them not to eat animals because animals feel pain, and they post images conveying their intention to eat three times as many as before or three times as many as the petitioner doesn't it.

You tell them to ditch machismo and act like sensible rational adults, and you get a thread full of bitter hateful responses, and accomplish nothing more than to further inculcate them in their views and attitudes.

You tell them to have compassion for a starving African child and they say "The starving child in Darfur can go fark himself."


Farkers are some of the most willful, egotistical, and intransigent people I have ever encountered. It's a shame they can be funny and insightful at times; otherwise I'd be able to get my farking ass the hell out of this place.

It sounds like your real problem is an uncontrollable urge to tell people what to do.

Wait, wasn't it just like 6 months ago that Starbucks was bent on doubling their crackhouses?

/dammit, can't find pic from Simpsons of all-Starbucks mall :/

I have a solution to this problem sort of. First find the one store with heavy traffic that is being shut down. Next begin the "Save the starbucks" campaign and have everyone donate me money until I have saved up a lot (amount depends on next couple of steps). Next I will buy a starbucks franchise and then set up shop at the previously named store location. Once business picks up again I can then sell it to some yuppy and walk away with the remaining money from the "save the starbucks" campaign and also the money from selling the store and I'll be set.

Now, who wants to step up and donate money first!

I went there once and ordered a large coffee... hated the place since.