Perhaps parents should take a more active role in watching their children.

what pathetic wusses.

Witch who allegedly killed lil hanzel and lil gretel..unavailable for comment

b!

It's a wonder that any of us lived to see adulthood.

TFA: Thiensville Police Chief Richard Preston said a 4-year-old boy was hit by another child riding a bike... They took him to (Columbia) St. Mary's Ozaukee (Hospital) to be checked out.

Really? Wow...

I got hit by cars when I was a child, and all I ever got was a good yelling-at by the drivers.

/my lawn
//get off

I was expecting the uproar to be about the fattie-fication of America's snowflakes. It's actually a little refreshing to hear that people are concerned about kids getting hit by bikes instead of parents blaming other people's candy for making their kid a tubby bastard.

I remember when anything that happened to a child was the child's fault.

You fell and scraped your knee? Suck it up.
You got your new clothes dirty? That's a paddling.

But now,
You ran into the street during a parade? Let's change the legislation.

These kids are going to have a depressing childhood.

I wonder what the velocity of a thrown peppermint would be?

Uhh, you might want to fly in some consultants from New Orleans/Mardi Gras to learn how to handle this.

Spreadhead: Uhh, you might want to fly in some consultants from New Orleans/Mardi Gras to learn how to handle this.

That's easy. No candy unless you flash 'em.

Made me think of this (pops, not a rickroll)

Trick E. Dick: I remember when anything that happened to a child was the child's fault.

You fell and scraped your knee? Suck it up.
You got your new clothes dirty? That's a paddling.

But now,
You ran into the street during a parade? Let's change the legislation.

Aw, watching the kiddies get ran over by the floats was one of the best parts of the parade.
It was like watching Darwinism in action.

Run out for Free Candy?
-- OR --
Not be squished like a bug and live a full life?

// Decisions... decisions...

Trick E. Dick: I remember when anything that happened to a child was the child's fault.

You fell and scraped your knee? Suck it up.
You got your new clothes dirty? That's a paddling.



One of my friends still does this. Her kid fell and she asked him "Are you bleeding? No? Then stop crying." It's a good thing, seeing as most of the kids I see on a daily basis have no parental control whatsoever and know how to work the system already. Half the time parents these days actually encourage their kids to do what they want and get mad if people tell them they can't do something.

helsdottir: I wonder what the velocity of a thrown peppermint would be?

African or European peppermint?

When will we realize that you can't legislate natural selection?

Nekulturny African or European peppermint?

I bow to you. I was trying to figure out how to turn that into a Monty Python reference and somehow that never occurred to me.

/slowly building clap

At first I thought this story might be from my area. We had three floats pulled from a parade last week for violating an ordinance against throwing candy.

/one of the floats was the National Guard
//why does the city council hate America?

Vangor: Nekulturny African or European peppermint?

I bow to you. I was trying to figure out how to turn that into a Monty Python reference and somehow that never occurred to me.

/slowly building clap

'Twas my goal with the original post.

Thank you for playing!

/Sees Monty Python references everywhere
//just assumes other people do, too

Vangor:

/slowly building clap

Penicillin should clear that right up for you.

wmoonfox: TFA: Thiensville Police Chief Richard Preston said a 4-year-old boy was hit by another child riding a bike... They took him to (Columbia) St. Mary's Ozaukee (Hospital) to be checked out.

Really? Wow...

I got hit by cars when I was a child, and all I ever got was a good yelling-at by the drivers.

/my lawn
//get off

When I was a kid, I wasn't paying attention and pulled out in front of a car, the driver was only going about 20mph, I got flung off my bike and the front tire got bent up. A neighbor saw what happened and called the cops. When the cop showed up I got biatched at for not paying attention and sent on my way.

dahuka: When will we realize that you can't legislate natural selection?

Back in the old days families would have lots of kids (no child labor laws) and the ones that were too dim or too clumsy or too vulnerable to get sick, just died.

Kind of like the Puppy Mills back when the old-fashioned family structure was more exploitative, one kid lost or one puppy lost was not a big deal. If a runt puppy got eaten by momma dog, then momma dog knew something that was not immediately obvious to us. If Mother Nature said, "This kid just ain't right", then that kid died pretty quick.

Sure we can protect the dumbest kids from restraining their "No Self-Control" genes by forbidding candy from being thrown out at parades, but what of the situation when the kid is walking down the sidewalk on a normal traffic day and their ball rolls out in the road with bunches of fast-moving cars zooming by?

Somewhere a mental logical calculation of "Vehicle weighing a ton moving against a 60-pound kid" or an instinctive calculation of "Holy Crap! I'll be squished like a bug if I run out there, that ball of mine is gone gone gone" needs to pass through the kid's mind. Free candy during a slow-moving parade is just a symptom of larger real-life situations that will be encountered in the kid's life later on. Since the veto power of "Mother Nature" saying, "That kid just ain't right" is pretty much needed for our species despite the initial tragedy of a squished kid on the pavement, it is far better to be a little less concerned for the kid that is now so much as the grown adult that was coddled into 50 years of terrifying lack of self-control.

WizardofToast: These kids are going to have a depressing childhood life.

The problem in my hometown was that for night-time parades (our Halloween parade was always at night), all the punks and trashy kids would walk around, and when the floats or parade people would throw candy to the little kids sitting on the sidewalk, the trash kids would run out and grab it before the little kids could get to it, then follow the stupid trucks all the way along the parade route to get all the candy they threw out. Retards. So now they have Halloween parades during the day and they hardly throw any candy out. Or they will find little kids and walk right over to them and hand it to them.

At our 4th of July parade, someone was throwing unfrozen freezer pops. Both that landed at our feet broke open. Granted nobody was run over but I paid absolutely nothing to sit there and have goods thrown at me and I expect a little better next time.

Oliver Twisted: Granted nobody was run over

Obviously you need to attend better parades.

Nekulturny: helsdottir: I wonder what the velocity of a thrown peppermint would be?

African or European peppermint?

Beat me to it.

Hydrostatic_Equilibrium: When I was a kid, I wasn't paying attention and pulled out in front of a car, the driver was only going about 20mph, I got flung off my bike and the front tire got bent up. A neighbor saw what happened and called the cops. When the cop showed up I got biatched at for not paying attention and sent on my way.

When something like that happens nowadays (and the kids aren't hit, just almost hit) on a collector roadway (not a small residential street), they call the police and tell them to set up a speed patrol on the street (and the police went the route of telling you you were traveling faster than you actually were). I found that out the hard way.

Hydrostatic_Equilibrium: wmoonfox: TFA: Thiensville Police Chief Richard Preston said a 4-year-old boy was hit by another child riding a bike... They took him to (Columbia) St. Mary's Ozaukee (Hospital) to be checked out.

Really? Wow...

I got hit by cars when I was a child, and all I ever got was a good yelling-at by the drivers.

/my lawn
//get off

When I was a kid, I wasn't paying attention and pulled out in front of a car, the driver was only going about 20mph, I got flung off my bike and the front tire got bent up. A neighbor saw what happened and called the cops. When the cop showed up I got biatched at for not paying attention and sent on my way.

you do that sort thing in the middle of the road? you freak!!

So are kids in these communities bubble wrapped by the city, or do the parents foot the bill for it themselves?

I will not be buying bubble wrap for my kids, no need. They learned by themselves.

Their Mother: Dont touch the outlet!
Kid: Why?
Me: No go ahead, stick the fork in there.
Kid: ok...

Lesson learned. Kid doesnt play with outlets anymore.

Oh wait... a float is a bit more permanent than a little 110v AC...

...Has the idea of "Letting the floats/cars/bikes pass BEFORE running out to get candy" occurred to anyone?

Anyway... parents, if you don't want bad things to happen to your children... maybe you should BE A PARENT.

/I'm beginning to hate this nation
//at least it isn't Britain... probably have arrested the kid on the bike over there
///to give a sense of the kind of community it is where the kid was run over... here's a roadsign designed by children that makes absolutely no sense, except to suggest cars going forward emit pollution or some such

helsdottir: I wonder what the velocity of a thrown peppermint would be?

African or European peppermint?

He said he saw one person who threw the candy with great velocity, much like a baseball pitcher, into the crowd.

When I was in high school, the football players got to ride on a float during homecoming. We were supposed to "toss" candy to the elementary school kids who came to watch. Instead we used it as target practice and tried to hit them as hard as we could with it.

/yeah, we were pricks, so what!!

In fairness, that shiat can HURT.

We had an event at college where sophomores (the antagonist class)pelt freshmen with water balloons as they run past, and juniors (the sympathetic class) toss candy. Only that candy HURTS. I got a welt on me leg from a stray rootbeer barrel.

T.Durden: When I was in high school, the football players got to ride on a float during homecoming. We were supposed to "toss" candy to the elementary school kids who came to watch. Instead we used it as target practice and tried to hit them as hard as we could with it.

/yeah, we were pricks, so what!!

In spite of what I said about how we have over-reactive vaginas in this country, when people do stupid things...
Really, if that happened (targeting kids with hard throws), it's too bad either your football coach or a parent didn't go and kick the living shiat out of all of you.

If you did that to my kid, I'd have gone to jail and you'd have gone to the trauma center.

vwarb: you do that sort thing in the middle of the road? you freak!!

He figured no one would be watching.

Nekulturny: It's a wonder that any of us lived to see adulthood.

THIS

Here in Brookings, SD we have a holiday called Hobo Day. There is a big parade and people used to pass out candy up until 1990 where they ruled that they could no longer do it. Now they just have people walking along the parade route passing out candy to the kids. No one had gotten injured or died when they threw it so it's always been kinda asinine to me.

From the article: "Parents were very irresponsible letting their kids out in the street during the parade." That pretty much says it all.

dna_level_c: vwarb: you do that sort thing in the middle of the road? you freak!!

He figured no one would be watching.

i'm ALWAYS watching......

Issue guidelines to parade participants. I.e., "Candy may be handed out or thrown to spectators who are not in the street. Do not give candy to anyone who is in the street." And add a similar notice to parade advertisements: "Spectators are required to stay out of the street at all times. Parade participants giving out candy will not give candy to anyone who is in the street."

That's all it takes. You don't have to abolish the whole frigging thing just because there's one little problem. Human beings can actually be reasoned with.

This is a perfect sign.
It says, "My car farts and the nearly-invisible-to-the-background brightly colored kid shapes that are pretty-much-invisible-at-a-quick-glance enjoy my car farting."

But look how HAPPY these girls are at their pretty useless sign. Their self-esteems have been nurtured to the point that they can get jobs making very useless traffic signs that will be not comprehended by someone moving by them at 30-miles-per-hour with a 2 second glance plus puzzled comprehension time.

It also says the girls are tards being rewarded by incompetent school administrators for not even bothering to think rationally about the real world instances in which complete strangers will see this sign. Great news for idiots who value "art" over "practical applications of traffic control".

Candy is murder.

Forget it, Jake. It's Wisconsin....

/Oh jeeze...

vudukungfu: helsdottir: I wonder what the velocity of a thrown peppermint would be?

African or European peppermint?

You're about an hour and nine minutes late. Thanks for playing.