Completely meaningless, but still kind of funny - Barack Obama would have been a great villain name in the Die Hard series.

"Barack Obama" does not sound anything like "Hans Gruber."

Well, at least he has something going for him.

Well, you write at the level of your readership, I guess...

So is THIS the narrative they'll be going with for the fall?

I kind of like it, especially since Bruce Willis is a "die hard" Republican.

Will it win? Pancakes.

Real Men Vote for McCain
Top 10 reasons why.

When all else fails, attack his manhood. Real classy.

Really? The NRO really had to make this argument for their candidate?

God damn.

This came from NRO? This sounds more like one of those retarded Cracked top ten lists.

DeltaXi65: This came from NRO? This sounds more like one of those retarded Cracked top ten lists.

Cracked is 'The Economist' compared to NRO.

7. Obama is married to a bitter, angry lawyer who became "proud" of her country for the first time this year. McCain's wife is a beer heiress who founded an organization to provide MASH-style units to disaster-torn world regions. Did I mention that she's a beer heiress?

Yes, you did. You didn't mention that she stole from her charity to feed her drug habit. That part you missed. Why didn't you mention that part?

NRO is just mailing it in at this point.

New Republic Online: spiraling into the abyss of irrelevance one astoundingly silly article at a time.

Funny how they did not point out this...

McCain was still married and living with his wife in 1979 while, according to The New York Times' Nicholas Kristof, "aggressively courting a 25-year-old woman who was as beautiful as she was rich." McCain divorced his wife, who had raised their three children while he was imprisoned in Vietnam, then launched his political career with his new wife's family money.

Movie villains are elitists now? I'll have to add that to the ever-growing list.

I often hear from Fark's "conservatives" that elitism is difficult to define and that it doesn't have anything to do with wealth or education. They just know it when they see it. It's a gut reaction. For instance, a guy like Rich Lowry, editor of the National Review and popular right-wing pundit, who was born rich, went to Ivy-league schools, and probably never worked a day in his life outside of a Brooks Brothers suit, is not an elitist. Barack Obama, because he knows what arugala is, is an elitist.

I think I finally figured out what they mean and who they're talking about when they use the term "elitist": An elitist is anyone who doesn't vote straight-ticket Republican. Is that about right?

3. McCain supports nuclear power. Obama backs wind energy.

Wind energy is evil and hates America.

Don't fear the freeper.

- Lou Aguilar is a fiction writer and former Washington Post video critic, Washington Times television critic, and USA Today reporter.

LOL

Yippee-ki-ay, motherfreeper...

GoodScout: Don't fear the freeper.

I LOL'd.

Sure, because the last time we elected someone who was kinda like a cowboy, it worked great.

Well, it was kind of funny, but if you are going to write a comedy piece, you shouldn't put in actual RNC talking points. And you shouldn't put in false ones as well.

1. Barack Obama spent 20 years sitting in church while his preacher and others bad-mouthed the United States of America.

I doubt the preacher was badmouthing America that full time. fail


2. Obama wants to cut and run from Iraq regardless of conditions on the ground or future consequences.

So full of fail that it is almost beyond NRO levels of fail.

4. Obama wants restrictive gun control because only economically depressed middle-Americans "cling to God and guns."

Really? That's why? more fail

5. McCain has deviated from his party's conservative base on several occasions (McCain-Feingold Bill, Gang of 14, McCain-Kennedy Bill, opposition to torture).

McCain has either flip-flopped,broken the law or flip-flopped while breaking the law on all of those. even more fail


I don't feel the need to even go on with this.

GoodScout: Don't fear the freeper.

LOL

Too bad that their roles in that scenario are reversed.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8lvc-azCXY

/not a rr
//surprised Lucas hasn't sued yet

make me some tea: 3. McCain supports nuclear power. Obama backs wind energy.

Wind energy is evil and hates America.

Of course wind hates America. Just look at the destructive force of tornadoes through Jesus' Bible Belt!

If Barack Obama is President, will it still be called the White House?? Hmm?

Barack Obama can fark all night.

John McCain couldn't get a porn star off.


Barack Obama works out for three straight hours.

John McCain takes 40 minutes to take a piss.

It's been a while, but I seem to remember that at some point in our history, Comedy was actually funny.

/sighs
//goes back to putting marshmallows in the microwave.

dogfood: Barack Obama can fark all night.



Barack Obama cured my shingles by sheer willpower alone.

Unfortunately, it's Die Hard 37 and John McClain is far too past his prime to even outwit his landlady.

Still, major LOLZ at the headline, and Barack Obama does sound pretty ethnic so I guess it could pass as a Die Hard villain name. He's not nearly as much of a badass as Hans, though.

Maud Dib: dogfood: Barack Obama can fark all night.



Barack Obama cured my shingles by sheer willpower alone.

Barack Obama transformed my herpes into Slurpees.

FTA:

5. McCain has deviated from his party's conservative base on several occasions (McCain-Feingold Bill, Gang of 14, McCain-Kennedy Bill, opposition to torture).

If that isn't a huge indictment of a party's base, then I don't know what is.

I wonder if the author even realized this.

In any case, the level of political analysis in this article is par for the course for NRO--Middle School level thinking, elementary school emotions.

At least they admit they make this shiat up now:

FTA: Lou Aguilar is a fiction writer

Biological Ali:
Barack Obama transformed my herpes into Slurpees.

Obama gave me slurpees.

I'm sorry, but did a 5 year old write this? What the hell was that? This was suppose to be a joke article, right? Not a serious one?

If this was serious list, shouldn't people supporting McCain be concerned that this list couldn't come up with 10 REAL reasons to vote for McCain?

I'll just assume that this was a joke article.

If McCain is someone from a film, he's that deformed billionaire played by Gary Oldman in Hannibal.

McClane_Democrat- anyone want that alt? Anyone?

ToxicMunkee: Of course wind hates America. Just look at the destructive force of tornadoes through Jesus' Bible Belt!

And Nukes kill commies!!!

Jesus Christ, what has happened to the NRO?? This is what we call journalism?

Of all the insane, fearmongering, intellectually dishonest bullshiat...I wouldn't have been surprised to see, "11. Barack Obama sucks out spinal fluid from fetuses for strength, just like Christopher Reeve on that episode of South Park." And then see the author sagely nodding. "It's true, you know. Open your eyes!"

Ugh.

Wow, making fun of somebody's name. How old are these people?

But i have to say, it is hilarious that this is the best that they can throw at Obama.

McCain resembles Col. Stewart more.

kronicfeld: "Barack Obama" does not sound anything like "Hans Gruber."

It does if the Kool-Aid is mixed Jim Jones-style.

sigdiamond2000I often hear from Fark's "conservatives" that elitism is difficult to define and that it doesn't have anything to do with wealth or education. They just know it when they see it. It's a gut reaction ...

Stop with your lies. We all know that an elitist is one who believes that they should run the world because they are the best educated and therefore best suited to make decisions for all of us.

However, we market lliberalilzation proponents know that market price conveys more information about market supply and demand than any central planning committee can figure.

How many sixteen penny nails shall we allow to be manufactured this year commrades?

dogfood: Barack Obama can fark all night.

John McCain couldn't get a porn star off.


Barack Obama works out for three straight hours.

John McCain takes 40 minutes to take a piss.

When Chuck Norris falls into a pond, he doesn't get wet, the water gets Chuck Norris?

Barack Obama works out for three straight hours.


and if you'll excuse him, he has to be at the gym in 26 minutes.

again.

- Lou Aguilar is a fiction writer and former Washington Post video critic, Washington Times television critic, and USA Today reporter.

Talk about redundancy. NRO really does scrape the bottom of the barrel to keep the shrills of blind partisanship going.