And don't hang around with drunk people who carry brass knuckles. The article doesn't say he was drinking, but I'm just going out on a limb there, just taking a wild guess.

Maybe things could have turned out better for the victim had he been wearing braces.

Any bets on the height of the assailant being between 5'1" and 5'4"?

How are brass knuckles not a deadly weapon?! Nevertheless wtf...hey I'm going up the river for 10 years over 10 dollars! In retrospect that's totally worth it!

Sounds like he completely beat the living poop out that guy who had his 10$.

People who don't have...



maybe

What the article DOESN"T say is that brass-knuckle boy later found the ten dollars in his other pocket.

Mentioning them watching a UFC event prior to this assault is an extraneous detail. Quite like the kids who went on a crime spree post Grand Theft Auto playing, as if it directly inspired them to such actions. There is a link of violent mindsets but it is not simple causation.

/where's my $2?

man was charged with second-degree assault Thursday for allegedly clobbering a man

That makes me giggle!

Maybe it's just me, but I can't see Ultimate Fighting being of any interest to anyone who didn't have anger issues.

"After clobbering the man, he reached into his back pocket, finding the $10 he had thought he'd lost. He chuckled and began to urinate on the semi-consious man bleeding on his back porch."

Bagelox-99:Maybe it's just me, but I can't see Ultimate Fighting being of any interest to anyone who didn't have anger issues.

Why yes it is just you {snark}, some people like the contest with no wish to emulate the athletes.

So, if I understand based on that guy who found $400,000, the $10 in the guy's pocket could have easily reached $100-$500 during the course of that night.

That wasn't a beating; it was an investment.

DeathByGeekSquad:Any bets on the height of the assailant being between 5'1" and 5'4"?

I'll take the 5'5" to 5'6" range... for $10

Bagelox-99: Maybe it's just me, but I can't see Ultimate Fighting being of any interest to anyone who didn't have anger issues.

I second Uncoolest. Just because you don't understand something, you don't need to make snarky comments about it. And if you do it again, I'LL RIP YOUR FARKING HEAD OFF AND JAM IT DOWN YOUR BLOOD-SQUIRTING THROAT.

Bagelox-99:Maybe it's just me, but I can't see Ultimate Fighting being of any interest to anyone who didn't have anger issues.

It's a sport. It's no more violent than football when it's broken down (MMA used to be about brawling, but has been heavily refined and standardized). Unlike football, it hasn't had enough time to appeal to certain demographics, so it's overloaded with 16-30 year old males which sort of distorts the image of fans. It'd be like judging football fans based on the people with face and body paint in the stands.

The women are fun to watch too. The sport is going to be huge in the coming decade. fark boxing.

Bagelox-99:Maybe it's just me, but I can't see Ultimate Fighting being of any interest to anyone who didn't have anger issues.

I train at a legit MMA gym and am really amused by your reply...

/actually do - highest concentration of "good people" anywhere I know - definatly does NOT attract people with anger issues.

UFC - the official sport of short guys and closeted homosexuals.

The man suffered broken nose and eye bones, black eyes, a bruised ear, cut lips, a numb face and scratches to his body.



Jesus, why the ear??

Someone stole my ten dollars once.

Once.

I hope he had that comin.

If you've ever wanted to see two men touch their groins together, like me, Ultimate Fighting is awesome.

neilio42:DeathByGeekSquad:Any bets on the height of the assailant being between 5'1" and 5'4"?

I'll take the 5'5" to 5'6" range... for $10

My friend's ex (and my at-one-point roommate) was really into Ultimate Fighting and was actually a legitimately trained and ranked fighter. He was also 5'6".

At one point, we got into a discussion of what we would do if we ever got into a fight. Rich was going into all of these complicated details of what he would do that would end the fight without killing or crippling his opponent. My repeated strategy was "Well, I don't really like to fight. I'll just tackle the other guy and sit on him until he stops wanting to fight."

Rich kept arguing that if they guy really knew what he was doing, sitting on him would be a move that could be easily reversed, and that I might wind up getting hurt. I countered with the idea that most people don't know what they're doing, and if I had to, I'd just bounce their head off the floor. After much discussing, Rich got frustrated and decided that he'd show me how ineffective sitting on someone could be.

So, I straddle his chest, trying to keep my weight off his ribcage. He tries to do some fancy, twisting move to get out from under and... nothing. He tries a couple of other moves, none of which work.

He eventually conceded that someone my size (6'1", 250 pounds) could actually get away with it.

/no point to that story, except that I managed to pin a UFC fighter.

Bagelox-99:Maybe it's just me, but I can't see Ultimate Fighting being of any interest to anyone who didn't have anger issues.

What I came in to say.

Someone needs to do the world a favor and take this guy out of the gene pool.

schoberp:/no point to that story, except that I managed to pin a UFC fighter.

Your story is actually a good illustration of why weight classes are valid. Often, people who don't fight have an all or nothing view of it. "How can you be the pound-for-pound best?" It was always hard for me to explain why great fighters who were 5'5" and 135 pounds couldn't really compete in a rule-based fight with a guy who was 6'5" and 300 pounds. Height complicates things, but weight is the key issue. I've had my ass kicked by smaller guys (a particularly brutal beating came at the hands of a guy who weighed the same amount as me but was 5 inches shorter--I'm nearly 6'2"). I've also managed to defeat guys who were 7-8 inches taller but only 10 or 15 pounds heavier, so they were still in my weight class (Middleweight)

Port Orchard? 10 bucks says this guy is in the Navy

Maybe he has a lead deficiency?

I just assume any fan of UFC has anger issues arising from the latent homosexuality that they try to resolve through watching two sweaty men grapple with each other.

Klippoklondike:Port Orchard? 10 bucks says this guy is in the Navy A tweaker.


FTFY

Deathfrogg

yeah, good point. Could be both though

schoberp:neilio42:DeathByGeekSquad:Any bets on the height of the assailant being between 5'1" and 5'4"?

I'll take the 5'5" to 5'6" range... for $10

My friend's ex (and my at-one-point roommate) was really into Ultimate Fighting and was actually a legitimately trained and ranked fighter. He was also 5'6".

At one point, we got into a discussion of what we would do if we ever got into a fight. Rich was going into all of these complicated details of what he would do that would end the fight without killing or crippling his opponent. My repeated strategy was "Well, I don't really like to fight. I'll just tackle the other guy and sit on him until he stops wanting to fight."

Rich kept arguing that if they guy really knew what he was doing, sitting on him would be a move that could be easily reversed, and that I might wind up getting hurt. I countered with the idea that most people don't know what they're doing, and if I had to, I'd just bounce their head off the floor. After much discussing, Rich got frustrated and decided that he'd show me how ineffective sitting on someone could be.

So, I straddle his chest, trying to keep my weight off his ribcage. He tries to do some fancy, twisting move to get out from under and... nothing. He tries a couple of other moves, none of which work.

He eventually conceded that someone my size (6'1", 250 pounds) could actually get away with it.

/no point to that story, except that I managed to pin a UFC fighter.

You should be proud. a 6'1" 250lb guy pinning a guy that was 5'6" and probably about 145-150lbs at best. That's like me pinning a 6 year old. Good job!

Oh, and he let you do it too. Gravity did all the work there buddy.

swahnhennessy:I just assume any fan of UFC has anger issues arising from the latent homosexuality that they try to resolve through watching two sweaty men grapple with each other.

I've said it before and I'll say it again, anyone that only thinks of sweaty men and gay sex when they watch MMA is a homosexual, closeted or otherwise.

swahnhennessy:I just assume any fan of UFC has anger issues arising from the latent homosexuality that they try to resolve through watching two sweaty men grapple with each other.

Men who are comfortable grappling as a contest of skill are probably the last ones to have latent homosexuality issues. They are, ad demonstratum, comfortable with it.

I would say it's the people who stand on the sidelines nervously pointing fingers and making shrill accusations of homosexuality that have repressed issues. Sort of, um, like you.

Had to read the story twice. This sounded so much like my wedding night that I had to make sure the victim wasn't my mother-in-law. She's doing okay now. Biatch had it coming to her though. I told her that the salad fork was on the left but would she listen?? Noooooo.

Sasqualogist:How are brass knuckles not a deadly weapon?! Nevertheless wtf...hey I'm going up the river for 10 years over 10 dollars! In retrospect that's totally worth it!

When "keeping it real" goes wrong

I won $10 off of a fan of that stuff once.
I bet him that within 30 seconds of the opening bell of every fight, the fighters would end up in the missionary position humping each other. Sure enough, within 30 seconds of the opening bell of every fight.

schoberp:neilio42:DeathByGeekSquad:Any bets on the height of the assailant being between 5'1" and 5'4"?

I'll take the 5'5" to 5'6" range... for $10

My friend's ex (and my at-one-point roommate) was really into Ultimate Fighting and was actually a legitimately trained and ranked fighter. He was also 5'6".

At one point, we got into a discussion of what we would do if we ever got into a fight. Rich was going into all of these complicated details of what he would do that would end the fight without killing or crippling his opponent. My repeated strategy was "Well, I don't really like to fight. I'll just tackle the other guy and sit on him until he stops wanting to fight."

Rich kept arguing that if they guy really knew what he was doing, sitting on him would be a move that could be easily reversed, and that I might wind up getting hurt. I countered with the idea that most people don't know what they're doing, and if I had to, I'd just bounce their head off the floor. After much discussing, Rich got frustrated and decided that he'd show me how ineffective sitting on someone could be.

So, I straddle his chest, trying to keep my weight off his ribcage. He tries to do some fancy, twisting move to get out from under and... nothing. He tries a couple of other moves, none of which work.

He eventually conceded that someone my size (6'1", 250 pounds) could actually get away with it.

/no point to that story, except that I managed to pin a UFC fighter.

I think you're buddy's other problem was that he assumed there would be rules in said real life fight. Especially if you're fighting for your life. I'm 5'1" and probably weigh in the range of 130 lbs, if some beast at 6'5" and 250 is trying to rape me, I'm going for anything I can, eyes, septum, pressure points, groin, whatever will save my arse.

If you're in that situation, thinking fast and getting a quick strike in, no matter how cheap, would be the only things I would think would save you from a larger, potentially faster and stronger attacker.

ihatedumbpeople:schoberp:neilio42:DeathByGeekSquad:Any bets on the height of the assailant being between 5'1" and 5'4"?

I'll take the 5'5" to 5'6" range... for $10

My friend's ex (and my at-one-point roommate) was really into Ultimate Fighting and was actually a legitimately trained and ranked fighter. He was also 5'6".

At one point, we got into a discussion of what we would do if we ever got into a fight. Rich was going into all of these complicated details of what he would do that would end the fight without killing or crippling his opponent. My repeated strategy was "Well, I don't really like to fight. I'll just tackle the other guy and sit on him until he stops wanting to fight."

Rich kept arguing that if they guy really knew what he was doing, sitting on him would be a move that could be easily reversed, and that I might wind up getting hurt. I countered with the idea that most people don't know what they're doing, and if I had to, I'd just bounce their head off the floor. After much discussing, Rich got frustrated and decided that he'd show me how ineffective sitting on someone could be.

So, I straddle his chest, trying to keep my weight off his ribcage. He tries to do some fancy, twisting move to get out from under and... nothing. He tries a couple of other moves, none of which work.

He eventually conceded that someone my size (6'1", 250 pounds) could actually get away with it.

/no point to that story, except that I managed to pin a UFC fighter.

You should be proud. a 6'1" 250lb guy pinning a guy that was 5'6" and probably about 145-150lbs at best. That's like me pinning a 6 year old. Good job!

Oh, and he let you do it too. Gravity did all the work there buddy.



You miss his point...

He's not bragging ("Hey, I can kick a UFC guy's ass by sitting on him..."), he was just sharing an experience about how his significantly larger size allowed him to keep the much-smaller "fighter" immobilized that evening.

We could launch a long discussion about how his buddy could have shifted his hips this way or that way...or forces the larger fighter's center of gravity this way or that way...but that's the kind of stuff that belongs on the UFC discussion boards, no?

Too bad none of the other party-goers there decided to pretend to be "Big John McCarthy" and dive in like a referee yelling "break it up" and raise brass knuckle-boy's hand in the air instead of letting him wreck the poor guy's head...

Timmy the Tumor:

Too bad none of the other party-goers there decided to pretend to be "Big John McCarthy" and dive in like a referee yelling "break it up" and raise brass knuckle-boy's hand in the air instead of letting him wreck the poor guy's head...

I wonder if someone wasn't egging the nutjob on....there's always that one guy or girl at parties that starts everything but never totally commits to the fight.

"Dude, he sooooo took your $10, go beat the shiat out of him!"

euge:Sounds like he completely beat the living poop out that guy who had his 10$.

Sounds like he spent it earlier and forgot about it. Who steals $10?

FTFA: Wilson returned to the semiconscious victim and began kneeing him in the side of the head.



He's a Pride fan?

schoberp:neilio42:DeathByGeekSquad:Any bets on the height of the assailant being between 5'1" and 5'4"?

I'll take the 5'5" to 5'6" range... for $10

My friend's ex (and my at-one-point roommate) was really into Ultimate Fighting and was actually a legitimately trained and ranked fighter. He was also 5'6".

At one point, we got into a discussion of what we would do if we ever got into a fight. Rich was going into all of these complicated details of what he would do that would end the fight without killing or crippling his opponent. My repeated strategy was "Well, I don't really like to fight. I'll just tackle the other guy and sit on him until he stops wanting to fight."

Rich kept arguing that if they guy really knew what he was doing, sitting on him would be a move that could be easily reversed, and that I might wind up getting hurt. I countered with the idea that most people don't know what they're doing, and if I had to, I'd just bounce their head off the floor. After much discussing, Rich got frustrated and decided that he'd show me how ineffective sitting on someone could be.

So, I straddle his chest, trying to keep my weight off his ribcage. He tries to do some fancy, twisting move to get out from under and... nothing. He tries a couple of other moves, none of which work.

He eventually conceded that someone my size (6'1", 250 pounds) could actually get away with it.

/no point to that story, except that I managed to pin a UFC fighter.

To be fair, you basically started off with the pin :)

Getting a trained person into that position might be harder. Then again, if you had half of his training, you'd probably beat him to a pulp if so inclined. But you sound more like me. Lover, not fighter.

RICKSON BY ARMBAR

Bagelox-99:Maybe it's just me, but I can't see Ultimate Fighting being of any interest to anyone who didn't have anger issues.

Ding ding ding!
Well, that or they have desire to see someone getting beaten up

I just think that the fan base for this sport is full of guys who think they're tough just because they order UFC fights on Pay Per View.

I only watch UFC with itchy drunks who adhere to Marquis of Queensbury rules when brawling.

Hide your chickens
What the article DOESN"T say is that brass-knuckle boy later found the ten dollars in his other pocket.

I see what you did there.

Suicidal Writer:schoberp:/no point to that story, except that I managed to pin a UFC fighter.

Your story is actually a good illustration of why weight classes are valid. Often, people who don't fight have an all or nothing view of it. "How can you be the pound-for-pound best?" It was always hard for me to explain why great fighters who were 5'5" and 135 pounds couldn't really compete in a rule-based fight with a guy who was 6'5" and 300 pounds. Height complicates things, but weight is the key issue. I've had my ass kicked by smaller guys (a particularly brutal beating came at the hands of a guy who weighed the same amount as me but was 5 inches shorter--I'm nearly 6'2"). I've also managed to defeat guys who were 7-8 inches taller but only 10 or 15 pounds heavier, so they were still in my weight class (Middleweight)

One of the first UFC PPV events (UFC 3) featured a 618lb 6'8" sumo (Emmanuel Yarborough) vs a 200lb 6' karate fighter (Keith Hackney). This was a time prior to, obviously, weight classes and when groin strikes and knees to the head were still allowed. Pretty much everything other than biting and eye gouging was allowed, so it was pretty much as close as it ever got to a "street fight" as it ever was.

The 200# guy won by getting on the sumo's back and hammer striking his face until he fractured his cheek/orbital. He was, however, unable to continue on to the next round because he had broken his hand with the force of his own blows.

Chaghatai:Bagelox-99:Maybe it's just me, but I can't see Ultimate Fighting being of any interest to anyone who didn't have anger issues.

I train at a legit MMA gym and am really amused by your reply...

/actually do - highest concentration of "good people" anywhere I know - definatly does NOT attract people with anger issues.

where do you train? Is it Impact?

When I read that it was the fights on the 5th, I was assuming it was because they were arguing over the Griffin-Jackson fight.

/ Griffin won, deal with it.