I want to call them douches but that seems so redundant at this point

Don't they know that the blogosphere is the sixth estate?

They'll be at Bonnaroo this week.

I won't be seeing their show

/what? I have mo' betta things to be doing

TFA says the blogger wrote a positive review? Is it stupid day in farksville?

This was posted on the blogger in questions website....

Seeing as we're not allowed to tell you that Metallica's new album sounds like . . . And Justice For All, we're not supposed to mention that one of the songs on the album may or may not be called Flamingo and we're certainly 100% most definitely not supposed to suggest that the new record might possibly be good, we thought we'd treat you to an interview with the group back when they released . . . And Justice For All. Which the new album may or may not sound like. We really couldn't comment.

SockMonkeyHolocaust: Don't they know that the blogosphere is the sixth estate?

You know who else liked to censor journalists?

peck: You know who else liked to censor journalists?

Quiet Riot?

Wait, are they implying that the new album is actually good? I'm not sure if I can deal with that; could throw my fragile little mind into a total tailspin...

Something like this seems to have happened to Classic Rock's article. Bravewords.com linked to the CR article; but what's on Bravewords.com is a lot longer than CR's article.

See for yourself (new window)

From TFA -
And to repeat, they invited a blogger to a listening party, without having the sense to have that blogger sign a non-disclosure agreement. What was the expected result?


Old dogs and tricks - leopards and spots - etc.

peck: You know who else liked to censor journalists?

The Bilderberg Group?

Does anybody want to even get their new album.

baka-san: Does anybody want to even get their new album

Only if it's offered exclusively at Wal*Mart.

I don't care whether their new album is good or not. I get far more enjoyment in calling them douche bags and poking fun at Lars Ulrich's tiny, tiny penis.

Wait, everybody...I just noticed the expiration date on this band. Turns out they spoiled and coagulated about 20 years ago.

Pour it down the sink, and be sure to rinse out the carton so it doesn't stink up the trash.

The last CD I bought was St.Anger the patron saint of awful.

//Has not been good since Ride the Lightning

baka-san: Does anybody want to even get their new album.

I'll wait for the torrent.

I'd like to thank Lars Ulrich for going on CNN back in the day and turning me onto Napster. Until then I had never heard of it.
It's been an abundance of free music ever since.

Okay, okay, we get it. You hate Metallica. Metallica is the biggest bunch of loser douchebags ever hated by the unwashed masses on the internetz. Band X that I've never heard of is 100000000000x played through a set of $5 fleamarket speakers better than Master of Puppets with $500000 reference speakers. You hate them so much that you can't shut up about it. You hate them so much that you generate 1.21 GigaJoules of NetHate for them per posting, which will ensure that everyone knows you hate them more than even the 'They'll get over it' guy.

Know what? People like doing the same thing to Microsoft. They're doing really poorly now.

Keep up the good work, netizens!

/Say, does anyone else here hate Metallica, and want to post a blog that will inevitably destroy the band? Threaten that you and your ONE MILLION friends will boycott all things Metallica?
//Because it's been working so well, so far.
///Any publicity...

Doesn't matter to me if it's good or not, though I'm guessing it won't be.

Already have a nice stack of 100 blank CD's set aside to burn the new album on and pass out to anyone considering paying money for it.

The only member of Metallica with any musical talent whatsoever died September 27, 1986 on the side of a highway near Dörarp, Sweden.

Say whatever about Metallica, I don't care, but TFA says the blogger wrote a positive review.

I don't get it, I mean, it's cool to act like you hate Metallica, but what's the point of lying in the headline? People would come in here and bash them even if the headline read: OMG METALLICA'S NEW ALBUM ROCKS!!!

/so far hasn't heard a bad review of the new album

Kali-Yuga: Already have a nice stack of 100 blank CD's set aside to burn the new album on and pass out to anyone considering paying money for it.

I really, really, really, really, really hope you do this. That way you can come back to Fark and tell us all about the 100's of dollars you screwed Metallica out of. It will be so cool the only option left will be for us to deem you the coolest of Metallica haters. Your World of Warcraft friends will be so proud of you! Maybe your Second Life girlfriend will even cyber with you.

ancker: I really, really, really, really, really hope you do this. That way you can come back to Fark and tell us all about the 100's of dollars you screwed Metallica out of. It will be so cool the only option left will be for us to deem you the coolest of Metallica haters. Your World of Warcraft friends will be so proud of you! Maybe your Second Life girlfriend will even cyber with you.


Though my sarcasm meter is broken and I can't accurately decipher your retort, I can tell you for a fact that the frog over there in the corner is the biggest god damn frog in the world - certainly the largest I've ever seen.

voidkat: Okay, okay, we get it. You hate Metallica. Metallica is the biggest bunch of loser douchebags ever hated by the unwashed masses on the internetz. Band X that I've never heard of is 100000000000x played through a set of $5 fleamarket speakers better than Master of Puppets with $500000 reference speakers. You hate them so much that you can't shut up about it. You hate them so much that you generate 1.21 GigaJoules of NetHate for them per posting, which will ensure that everyone knows you hate them more than even the 'They'll get over it' guy.

Know what? People like doing the same thing to Microsoft. They're doing really poorly now.

Keep up the good work, netizens!

/Say, does anyone else here hate Metallica, and want to post a blog that will inevitably destroy the band? Threaten that you and your ONE MILLION friends will boycott all things Metallica?
//Because it's been working so well, so far.
///Any publicity...

OK, first of all; dude, take a ritalin.


Secondly...


"Agreed! Bloggers are evil! And they're the scourge of the Earth!" And Lars is God!

voidkat: Okay, okay, we get it. You hate Metallica. Metallica is the biggest bunch of loser douchebags ever hated by the unwashed masses on the internetz. Band X that I've never heard of is 100000000000x played through a set of $5 fleamarket speakers better than Master of Puppets with $500000 reference speakers. You hate them so much that you can't shut up about it. You hate them so much that you generate 1.21 GigaJoules of NetHate for them per posting, which will ensure that everyone knows you hate them more than even the 'They'll get over it' guy.

Know what? People like doing the same thing to Microsoft. They're doing really poorly now.

Keep up the good work, netizens!

Translation:

I listen to radio rock pablum, Nickelback is my favorite band!!
and:

METALLICA'S STILL GOOD TO ME DAMN IT!!

Ruca: They'll be at Bonnaroo this week.

I won't be seeing their show

/what? I have mo' betta things to be doing


When they do shiat like this, It only makes me madder that my friend's band is going to tour with them. I hope none of metallica's douch cooties rubs off on them.

They should rename the band Phallica because they are a bunch of dicks.

voidkat: Okay, okay, we get it. You hate Metallica. Metallica is the biggest bunch of loser douchebags ever hated by the unwashed masses on the internetz. Band X that I've never heard of is 100000000000x played through a set of $5 fleamarket speakers better than Master of Puppets with $500000 reference speakers. You hate them so much that you can't shut up about it. You hate them so much that you generate 1.21 GigaJoules of NetHate for them per posting, which will ensure that everyone knows you hate them more than even the 'They'll get over it' guy.

Know what? People like doing the same thing to Microsoft. They're doing really poorly now.

Keep up the good work, netizens!

well ... i think folks are somewhat justified in being pissed. the very things they "sang" and "stood" against are now exactly what they are. they've worked really hard to epitomize themselves as poster children for "sellouts". they're a band that a lotta kids (like me) really admired and drew a lotta musical influence from. and now, everytime they're mentioned in the news/intarnets it has to do with legal action against fans.

couple that with REALLY bad song writing (over the last few albums), and you've got a recipe for angry fans. REALLY angry fans.

and - for the record ...

So I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess Lars' Fark name is Voidkat, then...

I took a loaf of bread and some peanut butter from the grocery store today, and they got pissed off at me for not paying for it and tried to make me pay.

GOD RAINBOW EMPLOYEES ARE DICKS

oldfred: I took a loaf of bread and some peanut butter from the grocery store today, and they got pissed off at me for not paying for it and tried to make me pay.

GOD RAINBOW EMPLOYEES ARE DICKS

you shoulda stolen apples and oranges. because they're as similar as stealing from a grocery store and making an "unauthorized copy" of digital media

Kali-Yuga: The only member of Metallica with any musical talent whatsoever died September 27, 1986 on the side of a highway near Dörarp, Sweden.



Actually the only member of Metallica with any musical talent whatsoever was kicked out of the band in 1983.

FAN: You have no idea what it is to lose what I have lost.
METALLICA: I know loss, FAN.
FAN: No you don't! I'm a FAN. I'm a strong, virile, horse of a FAN stuck in the body of some weak, sick bastard that I don't know, like, or recognize. Now if you knew what that feels like, you would have never convinced me to listen to anything after Puppets. If you knew what it feels like, Metallica, ...you would have let me go.

Well, this is just another reason I think Metallica needs to be eliminated.. I mean FRICKIN WIPED from the face of the Earth.. ok.. yeah I think everyone gets the idea of how I feel about these jerks. I used to really enjoy their music... now I would rather listen to Abba or Barry Manilow.

I pre-ordered my copy on bit torrent already.

SepuItura: Actually the only member of Metallica with any musical talent whatsoever was kicked out of the band in 1983.

Mustaine got the "Pete Best"/"Brian Jones" treatment. Too good-looking and with too much talent and personality to let James (John, Paul, Mick, Keith) dominate 100%.

Kicked out for excessive drinking...yeah right. If they had a problem with his behavior, they should have gone to him like men and asked him to clean it up. But they turfed him immediately, without giving him a chance. So obviously they just wanted an excuse to add another submissive sycophant to the group.

/Not sure about Pete Best's talent, but he did attract a lot of attention from the ladies, which stuck in Messrs. Lennon and McCartney's craw.

{quote]kivelo 2008-06-10 09:49:51 AM
SepuItura: Actually the only member of Metallica with any musical talent whatsoever was kicked out of the band in 1983.

Mustaine got the "Pete Best"/"Brian Jones" treatment. Too good-looking and with too much talent and personality to let James (John, Paul, Mick, Keith) dominate 100%.

Kicked out for excessive drinking...yeah right. If they had a problem with his behavior, they should have gone to him like men and asked him to clean it up. But they turfed him immediately, without giving him a chance. So obviously they just wanted an excuse to add another submissive sycophant to the group.

/Not sure about Pete Best's talent, but he did attract a lot of attention from the ladies, which stuck in Messrs. Lennon and McCartney's craw.

OMFG you were there for TWO controversial firings? dayum you get around!

I love people who don't know what they're talking about when they run their farking mouths.

All members of metallica, present and past, are talented. That's why they're millionaires, douches.

/they have become what they have railed against, tho.
//remembers when they swore they would never make a video.

Oh you mean they're pissed? They're angry? They have a right to be? After 15 years of venting, they still have room to cry about it?

And the rest of you fallacious idjuts... I wasn't even defending Metallica. Which part of my post is the one where I say they're still the greatest? Or even good?

No, I was attacking the farking whiners who still can't stop bleeding out of their asses about how evil Metallica beat up Napster and destroyed the internetz. Who feel the urgent need to remind us about when Metallica sold out. Because I sure as hell forget that, in the .0004 nanoseconds that we aren't reminded of this. I'm just saying WE FARKING GET IT ALREADY.

I'm not being pro-Metallica at the moment, I'm actually displeased with the recent actions as well. I'm just saying, if I need a farking ritalin, these whiny ass-snots need to take a shot of shut the fark up, already.

/Metallica hate means more to some of these people than Metallica love did to the fans in their heyday. It's nauseating.

//Paris Hilton sucks!!!!
///Free James Brown!!!!
////Give peace a chance!!!!
//See how things get old and tired after a while?
//Motherfarkin' slashies, motherfarker!!!!

voidkat: No, I was attacking the farking whiners who still can't stop bleeding out of their asses about how evil Metallica beat up Napster and destroyed the internetz.

Dude....they sued their fans. Thats more the point than "{they beat up napster"

shiat, as long as the caffeine is kicking me in the brains of my balls, can we just get a "Metallica" music tag with a dollar bill background and hot pink lettering to bullet every heading where any given band does something stupid and sucky, so we can preempt the need for someone to let us know how much they suck, they're dead, they never were, they lost all their talent in 19XX with who ? It would work out really well for a great many sellout douchebands, and be a Spanish style upside down exclamation point for all things Metallica.

...who gets the swift Napster treatment (per headline)
...and turning me onto Napster - stinky93

/Yeah, you're right flecsrogar, what was I thinking? This thread was all about them suing their fans. What with the 0 posts about suing, and the very headline dredging up the Napster issue.

voidkat: ...who gets the swift Napster treatment (per headline)
...and turning me onto Napster - stinky93

/Yeah, you're right flecsrogar, what was I thinking? This thread was all about them suing their fans. What with the 0 posts about suing, and the very headline dredging up the Napster issue.

No, i'm saying they deserve any and all criticisms because they sued their fans.

No, i'm saying they deserve any and all criticisms because they sued their fans.

Show me some sources. I don't remember them suing their fans. Napster yes, fans, not so much.

Madbassist1: No, i'm saying they deserve any and all criticisms because they sued their fans.
Show me some sources. I don't remember them suing their fans. Napster yes, fans, not so much.

Ah, it appears you were correct. They only sued napster, which alienated fans.

I don't hate Metallica and I am not angry at them for trying to protect their right to get paid for their work.

That is no excuse or the awful music they have made in the recent past. If they want to sell music though, I would suggest them creating a better product.

I just bought the latest Dokken CD and it is rockin'!

Not "Back For The Attack" but I give it 7 out of 10 stars.

Mettalica aside... RICK RUBIN FTW... I love that guy... he could make a gold bar out of a polished musical turd... +HES MAKING LARS SHUT THE fark UP ABOUT A CLICK TRACK AND PLAY NATURALLY.. Thats one of the funniest things about the videos they've posted online.. Lars crying like a biatch about the fact Rubin won't let him play with a farking metronome like Bob Rock did .. which ruined the bands music..
//Duh speed changes and tempo shifts were what gave the music its power.

doctorwormwood: //Duh speed changes and tempo shifts were what gave the music its power.

So tempo drift is a good thing? Excuse me, I am off to unpractice for an hour.

shadowself: So tempo drift is a good thing? Excuse me, I am off to unpractice for an hour.

Well done.

Seeing as we're not allowed to tell you that Metallica's new album sounds like . . . And Justice For All

So the bass is almost completely inaudible?