If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.
Fark SearchWeb Fark

         more options... Create account

(USA Today) Asinine If you're a student and you like milk, eggs, fish, shellfish, tree nuts, peanuts, gluten, penicillin, vaccinations, soy, polyester, or cotton, then here's some bad news for you   (usatoday.com) divider line 391
More: Asinine  

391 Comments   (+0 »)


Archived thread
First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | » | Last | Show all
 
Cat Shox 2008-06-08 01:41:51 PM  
This is the movie Idiocracy coming true...

Her nut allergy is so severe that she can go into shock if a child across a table or a school bus aisle eats peanut butter candy.

Seriously? What the hell, you are penalizing everyone else!

Eight foods account for 90% of all allergic reactions - peanuts, tree nuts, milk, eggs, fish, shellfish, soy and wheat.

Oh good thing we can eat dirt still... there's not much else available after removing the above products..

 
SoothinglyDeranged [TotalFark] 2008-06-08 01:55:47 PM  
Damn it, just let the wussy little allergic farks die and save us all a lot of damn trouble. If you can be killed by sniffing a peanut you farking well deserve death.

 
TheCheese [TotalFark] 2008-06-08 02:02:34 PM  
As someone who has severe allergies to two of the things on that list, and a minor allergy to one of the others, let me say that it really pisses me off when "precious snowflakes" who are only allergic to ONE thing force a substitution of another for the rest of us.

As in: "Some people are deathly allergic to peanuts, so we don't serve them on the plane anymore. Almonds?"

"I'm allergic to almonds."

 
Gecko Gingrich [TotalFark] 2008-06-08 02:07:02 PM  
I think we should do more to *hasten* Darwin's theory, not hinder it.

 
DarthBrooks [TotalFark] 2008-06-08 02:16:57 PM  
I worked with a woman who said her son was allergic to wood products. So he couldn't touch bannisters or hold pencils or sit in a wooden chair.

Isn't there a point where the school can just say, "okay, your allergy is beyond the ability of this school" and give the kid a pass to Bubble Boy Tech School or something?

 
Fellows [TotalFark] 2008-06-08 02:18:27 PM  
Her nut allergy is so severe that she can go into shock if a child across a table or a school bus aisle eats peanut butter candy.

You know, I'm sad to say it, but you really probably shouldn't mingle in the general population if your health and life is at risk simply because you're in relative proximity to a common activity.

I'm all for warnings on food items as to their ingredients so people with these conditions can have some forewarning, but you can't honestly expect to inconvenience the entire general population because you have a extreme medical condition.

You can't function normally in society if just being with 20 yards of a peanut is a risk to your life. I'm sorry, it's sad and I feel horrible for you, but that's the way it is.

 
hoots_toot_ochaye [TotalFark] 2008-06-08 02:18:44 PM  
They'd probably have avoided the upsurge in nut allergies if they had stopped the food industry from enriching so many products with soy, and convincing everyone that something like tofu was a great substitute for real meat - excessive soy exposure has been linked to nut allergies.

If they're going to go this far, then I think they should enact some legislation to eliminate all latex products from the medical field - I'm allergic to latex. But, they won't because a pair of latex examination gloves costs a few cents less than a pair of nitrile, or vinyl examination gloves.

 
Cake Hunter [TotalFark] 2008-06-08 02:24:48 PM  
Atomic bombs in the future will be filled with peanuts.

 
RocketRod [TotalFark] 2008-06-08 02:26:58 PM  
Has anyone ever noticed that the parents who are pushing allergen-free zones are usually the same folks who campaign for Evolution to be taught in the schools?

Isn't that cognitive-dissonance in one of its purest forms?

Darwin weeps.

 
Cake Hunter [TotalFark] 2008-06-08 02:33:33 PM  
RocketRod: Has anyone ever noticed that the parents who are pushing allergen-free zones are usually the same folks who campaign for Evolution to be taught in the schools?

Isn't that cognitive-dissonance in one of its purest forms?

Darwin weeps.


Never mind the fact that no sane person has ever seriously tried to link those two groups of people, but wanting sound science taught in schools is not the same as letting toddlers loose to see who dies and who is worthy of carrying on the genes.

What a weird way to try to make some bizarre point.

 
smooshie [TotalFark] 2008-06-08 02:45:47 PM  
My little brother is terribly allergic to eggs and peanuts, he goes to elementary school normally, just eats at a different table. He also plays in dirt and sets leaves on fire with a magnifying glass.

/hates idiotic soccer moms.

 
Tr0mBoNe [TotalFark] 2008-06-08 02:46:47 PM  
Want to avoid allergies and sickness and raise strong kids? Breast feed your kids. Make them go outside and play in the dirt and mud. Buy them a bike. Encourage sports. Raise strong kids.

In the end, everyone is allergic to Milk products. It's rather odd that humans drink milk after childhood, let alone milk of another species.

 
CraicBaby [TotalFark] 2008-06-08 03:00:53 PM  
Tr0mBoNe: Want to avoid allergies and sickness and raise strong kids? Breast feed your kids. Make them go outside and play in the dirt and mud. Buy them a bike. Encourage sports. Raise strong kids.

And don't use too much of that antibacterial shiat. It's ironic that the parents who try to sanitize everything to keep their kids from getting sick end up with kids who get sick a lot.

 
m0llusk [TotalFark] 2008-06-08 03:06:49 PM  
Death to the peanut huffers!

 
ecmoRandomNumbers [TotalFark] 2008-06-08 03:14:55 PM  
At what point do we just write these kids off as a genetic dead-end?

 
smooshie [TotalFark] 2008-06-08 03:19:29 PM  
ecmoRandomNumbers: At what point do we just write these kids off as a genetic dead-end?

There but for the grace of God (or chance, or fate, or whatever) go you.

 
ecmoRandomNumbers [TotalFark] 2008-06-08 03:23:00 PM  
smooshie: There but for the grace of God (or chance, or fate, or whatever) go you.

And Reese's peanut butter cups.

 
dahmers love zombie [TotalFark] 2008-06-08 03:26:13 PM  
If this keeps up I swear I will send my kids to school with lunches that include aerosol crab-n-peanut topping for their wheat gluten-dipped artifical-color bites.

 
Snarfangel [TotalFark] 2008-06-08 03:41:51 PM  
DarthBrooks: I worked with a woman who said her son was allergic to wood products. So he couldn't touch bannisters or hold pencils or sit in a wooden chair.

Isn't there a point where the school can just say, "okay, your allergy is beyond the ability of this school" and give the kid a pass to Bubble Boy Tech School or something?


I agree. Some hypoallergenic boarding school or something -- it'd be easier (and probably cheaper) to feed, house, and teach them in one place than it would be to try to make every school conform to their needs.

 
FarkingSean 2008-06-08 03:49:18 PM  
m0llusk: Death to the peanut huffers!

I lol'd. Twice.

 
DrMcNinja 2008-06-08 03:49:37 PM  
INTERNET TOUGH GUY THREAD!!!!!

 
beoswulf 2008-06-08 03:49:46 PM  
Tr0mBoNe: Want to avoid allergies and sickness and raise strong kids? Breast feed your kids. Make them go outside and play in the dirt and mud. Buy them a bike. Encourage sports. Raise strong kids.

In the end, everyone is allergic to Milk products. It's rather odd that humans drink milk after childhood, let alone milk of another species.


Huh? You mean lactose intolerance? That's not a food allergy, an allergy provokes a response from the immune system.

 
davynelson 2008-06-08 03:50:27 PM  
This is retarded.

Whatever happened to Utilitarianism?

 
Feltonl 2008-06-08 03:50:51 PM  
PUSSIES!

They bought their ticket, they knew what they were getting into, I say let 'em DIE!

 
Gravyguts 2008-06-08 03:51:16 PM  
*shakes head* weaklings. if this was SPARTAAAAAAAA!!!! they would have been thrown off the cliff

 
Selector 2008-06-08 03:52:22 PM  
davynelson: This is retarded.

Whatever happened to Utilitarianism?


The Thirteenth Amendment. Well, sort of.

 
thelordofcheese 2008-06-08 03:52:46 PM  
I'm gonna go with take precautions yourself. Isolate yourself. If you have friends they'll abstain in your presence. Hey, you may get your own dining room!
/has eaten lunch alone in HS
//sometimes quite is nice
///not allergic, just not so pathetic I need to be around someone all of the time because I hate myself so much that I have to be reminded that I'm loved every second through my constant contact and perceived popularity including: MySpace, Facebook, YouTube, Friendster, cellphones...

 
Porous Horace 2008-06-08 03:53:17 PM  
milk, eggs, fish, shellfish, tree nuts, peanuts, gluten, penicillin, vaccinations, soy, polyester, cotton

Now that's a delicious breakfast.

 
ultraholland 2008-06-08 03:53:42 PM  
The Alexandria, Va.-based nonprofit

I'm from Alexandria, so I'm getting a kick having severe allergic reactions.

 
FightDirector 2008-06-08 03:54:13 PM  
SoothinglyDeranged: Damn it, just let the wussy little allergic farks die and save us all a lot of damn trouble. If you can be killed by sniffing a peanut you farking well deserve death.

Newsletter, subscribe, etc.

 
randomstranger 2008-06-08 03:55:02 PM  
Gecko Gingrich: I think we should do more to *hasten* Darwin's theory, not hinder it.

I'm in.

 
LavenderWolf 2008-06-08 03:56:12 PM  
If your kid is so deathly allergic to basic foodstuffs, keep him or her at farking home.

 
wittybanter 2008-06-08 03:56:43 PM  
The parents should be training the kids to not eat the evil foods. If you could die from someone across a table eating something then you should probably be home schooled.

 
torquestripe 2008-06-08 03:57:10 PM  
First they came for the peanuts, and I said nothing.

 
BlippityBleep 2008-06-08 03:58:20 PM  
FTA: Her nut allergy is so severe that she can go into shock if a child across a table or a school bus aisle eats peanut butter candy. She takes four allergy medications every morning and carries two pens of self-injectable epinephrine, a form of adrenaline, everywhere she goes in case she starts to have a reaction.

I just wonder how much of her allergies are due to psychosomatic reasons. I can just see her mother freaking out all the time about it till the kid was as farked up as a football bat. Instead of suffering from an initial slight tingly feeling for an allergy it blew up into all of this crap.

 
frangelico_y_flamingo 2008-06-08 03:58:24 PM  
DarthBrooks: I worked with a woman who said her son was allergic to wood products. So he couldn't touch bannisters or hold pencils or sit in a wooden chair.

Isn't there a point where the school can just say, "okay, your allergy is beyond the ability of this school" and give the kid a pass to Bubble Boy Tech School or something?


They're not touching the wood. They're touching the varnish/lacquer/wax/paint. And that's NOT a likely allergen (unless recently applied).

I think if the kid is removed from the mother he'll be fine.

 
Brother Head 2008-06-08 03:59:26 PM  
To read The Brother's take on it, check out:

http://brotherhead.com/pivotblog/pivot/entry.php?id=11

 
thelordofcheese 2008-06-08 03:59:35 PM  
I love all the "they deserve to die because of a condition out of their control" (hey, attractive and successful African-Americans should die as well!) and "keep them at home" (refund my tax monies, asshole) comments.

Just isolate yourself. Sit in the corner. Eat alone. I did that stuff voluntarily a lot because of the terrible people in my school.

But then there were the good folks who actually wanted me around. And they made it a point to accommodate me (and I them).

 
stuhibiki 2008-06-08 03:59:45 PM  
Yay its another lets do something for a small minority of people so that the majority suffer.

 
Rakishi 2008-06-08 03:59:52 PM  
I was badly allergic to half the things on that list and at least one could kill me quite quickly. You know what my parents did? They gave a lunch from home and told me to avoid eating or being too close to things that will kill me. If I was eating out for some reason then I simply looked for something non-lethal to me or simply asked what was in the food if unsure. In case something bad happened I had an epi-pen and an inhaler.

 
frangelico_y_flamingo 2008-06-08 03:59:58 PM  
torquestripe: First they came for the peanuts, and I said nothing.

When they outlaw peanuts, only outlaws will have peanuts.

/ Or something.

 
anonimo 2008-06-08 04:00:32 PM  
"Having peanuts held up to my face is like having a gun held to my head"

No, it is not. Anyone can have gun held to their head. You, on the other hand, are broken and a naturally occurring foodstuff can kill you. Why do we have to play God and help these broken humans live?

 
thalidomide new and improved 2008-06-08 04:01:38 PM  
Gecko Gingrich: I think we should do more to *hasten* Darwin's theory, not hinder it.

THIS

 
milk_plus 2008-06-08 04:01:38 PM  
Peanut butter is pretty salty. Can I just smear that around my window seals and doors to keep sickly kids AND vampires away from my place? If so, I just scored a twofer.

 
blueviking 2008-06-08 04:01:47 PM  
Give me Reese's peanut butter cups or give me death!

Whoops...

 
BolognaSandwich 2008-06-08 04:01:54 PM  
Even if it is the parents' fault. The poor kids did nothing wrong. So let's have a bit of sympathy for them.

That being said, there needs to be some more research done on this upswing in allergies-if indeed it is one.

It seems to me that parents have two choices: homeschool or separation. They want this to be seen as a disability things, but it is different. Being paralyzed and in a wheelchair doesn't prevent others from leading a "normal" life, by adding a few ramps and such those with disabilities can be integrated.

This is more akin to those with mental problems whose presence disrupts the normal learning environment. They need a separate classroom.

As above, I feel badly about this, but at some point these kids are going to have to learn about protecting themselves. If they are not mature enough to do this, they need to be kept separate until they are. Partly this is for their own protection. Many of those foods are contained in things that might not be readily obvious. Unless they are going to monitor everyone's lunchbox, the kids need to be kept separate. If a separate table is not sufficient then they need to be removed from the environment.

 
Nepherym 2008-06-08 04:01:59 PM  
Hmm... I wonder where little "precious" could've gotten the allergy from? Could it be that mommy was too lazy to breastfeed? Just an idea. Let's investigate.

Her nut allergy is so severe that she can go into shock if a child across a table or a school bus aisle eats peanut butter candy.

Fear mongering on the parent's part, much? So many places cook with peanut oil now, she should be having an attack every time they drive past a fast food resteraunt.

FAIL

 
LavenderWolf 2008-06-08 04:02:11 PM  
thelordofcheese

Fail.

It's not the responsibility of the school system to remove a dozen basic items because two or three kids are allergic to them.

Call me an asshole, I don't care. I don't have kids, why isn't my tax money being refunded?

 
paulieY2J [TotalFark] 2008-06-08 04:03:30 PM  
Why are so many freaking kids allergic to things now? If they ban pb & j from schools, its the end my friends!

 
Bitter Coffee 2008-06-08 04:04:30 PM  
Rakishi: In case something bad happened I had an epi-pen and an inhaler.


Doesn't "Zero Tolerance" make these item contraband worth expulsion and arrest in today's climate?

/don't dose me, bro!

 
Displayed 50 of 391 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | » | Last | Show all


[Continue Farking]