That bunch of illiterate, uneducated slackers? Doubtful...

I hired a very good fluffer last week. He's a Duke grad.

Holy sh*t a POWERPOINT presentation? And she's only 22? F*ck man, at that rate she'll have mastered Word by 25 and then the old fogies will be cast out from their ivory towers.

If I had money invested in JP Morgan I would want them to make money and stop f*cking around with charities and let the board members go cruising for pussy on their own time.

The most sophisticated, accomplished, entitled graduates ever produced by American colleges are heading into the workplace.

If this can't be said about every new generation, there is a problem.

"Look at those Greatest Generation slackers. There was no 'social-security' when I was coming up."

Where's the unlikely tag?

I'd make it mandatory that any new employee delete their Facebook page before starting the job. That's what I'd do.

Of course they want the kids out of school. Most of them aren't married with kids, and so can work longer hours for less pay.

My peers and I are anything but capable. You have much to fear, old-timers. Cower with your colostomy bags, stock up on Ovaltine, and allow the Soulja Boys and Hollaback Girls take over. We will bury you under a pile of French fries, you diseased, old codgers. The political process will collapse entirely, and the president of 2032 will be decided by phone-in vote, hosted by a fake-tanned, balding Ryan Seacrest.

We are very real, and we are coming for you. At our own leisure, mind you, but we are coming. Just as soon as we level up one more time on WOW.

Entitled? Good luck with that kids, seeing as how you will be competing with mom and dad and aunt margo for the next 50 years.

I'll betcha you don't even make it to your mid 30's before the trendline of stress etc. makes you go middle age crazy, even though you'll live to your mid 90's at least.

/uh, yea, sorry about the mess we left
//no, I will NOT pick up after myself, that's why we had you
///boldly predict at least 3 mothers and 4 fathers in law for each of these kids by 2050

They have great credentials on paper. But ask them to read that paper and they can't.

Heamer:

Win!

Hail the slacker apocalypse!

Heamer: My peers and I are anything but capable. You have much to fear, old-timers. Cower with your colostomy bags, stock up on Ovaltine, and allow the Soulja Boys and Hollaback Girls take over. We will bury you under a pile of French fries, you diseased, old codgers. The political process will collapse entirely, and the president of 2032 will be decided by phone-in vote, hosted by a fake-tanned, balding Ryan Seacrest.

We are very real, and we are coming for you. At our own leisure, mind you, but we are coming. Just as soon as we level up one more time on WOW.

1/10. A little too incontinent. Even trolls have to make a point of some kind.

The "reporters" of the washington post understand their media is dying and with a wave of the hand give all the writing assignments to the millennial interns.

/Wasn't there some violent argument around y2k /about the proper spelling of milenial?

We can't even properly close HTML tags. Your wildest nightmares are coming true, old-timers. Your lawns are no longer safe. They will be our obsolete cell-phone repositories, the piles growing ever higher until they blot out the sun. The Millenialocalypse is nigh, rife with outrageously stupid neologisms and frenetically shifting retro-chic clothing styles; we'll be naked one day, dressed like Inuit seal-clubbers the next.

You're best isn't good enough, old-timers. Drink from our cups, and get Amped^TM.

And, as well qualified as this group seems to be, the graduates' appeal also lies in the fact that they'll be paid less than more experienced workers would be.

Um, fark you. How 'bout you pay the employee what they're farking worth you worthless fark. Better employee = more pay? Not in America.

Bucky Katt: 1/10. A little too incontinent. Even trolls have to make a point of some kind.

Not the millenial troll. Ignorance and apathy are our rallying cries, when we feel like it, or even remember. I am but a humble emissary, paid by Verizon^TM, McDonald's^TM, and Nike^TM to speak on the behalf of those who still haven't mastered fourth-grade English. I am a product of your own failures, old-timers.

My purpose is to consume, compain, and pass the buck.
Be afraid. Be very afraid.

BlippityBleep: And, as well qualified as this group seems to be, the graduates' appeal also lies in the fact that they'll be paid less than more experienced workers would be.

Um, fark you. How 'bout you pay the employee what they're farking worth you worthless fark. Better employee = more pay? Not in America.

We have been in this slide toward the third world for some time now. This just clinches it.

My purpose is to also misspell simple words like "complain". Ah, but I get a second chance! We millenials are all about second chances, participation trophies, and intact feelings. Our platform of "EVERYONE IS A WINNER" remains undisturbed, forever held in place by the mortar of positive reinforcement and pseudo-psychology. If we're all equal, then none shall fail!

Millenials, unite! We have much to destroy. Then, subsequently, blame on someone else.

You mean, each successive generation, having been educated by the generation that came before it, and thereby absorbing the knowledge of previous generations without having to spend the time learning it through trial and error, is more qualified than the last? Perish the thought!

Slow news day?

Hell, I'd be overqualified in any generation.

So, is the 'generation war' the circuses du-jour?

Without RTFA, it wouldn't be a surprise, more and more people have the ability to continue on to tertiary studies. Also, with the changes in factory type work ie it has been reducing for a long time, there isnt a way to finish school, go over to the local plant and work there life.

BlippityBleep: And, as well qualified as this group seems to be, the graduates' appeal also lies in the fact that they'll be paid less than more experienced workers would be.

Um, fark you. How 'bout you pay the employee what they're farking worth you worthless fark. Better employee = more pay? Not in America.

How do you know you're a better employee if you have no track record? Everyone gets a college degree, so that can't be used. Instead, you have to put in your time--which is what people are paid more for. A proven track record, rather than vague possibilities.

Entry-level jobs are entry-level for a reason--to give you that track record. Part of that, though, is that you get paid less.

Generation bashing threads are largely anecdote driven and thus are an exercise in futility.

They also have a huge entitlement problem and a piss poor work ethic. But they know powerpoint, so there's that.

It's like anything... there are stellar workers and there are the so-so types. You can't peg any one generation as any one thing... you can't, for example, accuse the boomer generation of spreading STDs like crazy, indulging in way more than they can afford, and foisting the burden on future generations, or accusing the gen Xers of divorcing the second things start to get difficult, tossing their kids into a shuffle between homes, and selfishly expecting the next generation to STFU and deal with it.

I want some articles on what was said of the boomer generation when they were just getting out of coll...err. High school.

I do know one major difference among my Y peer group... most were from broken homes (selfish late boomers and early gen-Xers, maybe?) so have some really old-fashioned views on marriage... mainly because they know exactly what it's like to have your parents bail on you. They also have a view of work that is more "self-centered" simply because they watched their parents and grandparents get shafted left and right for daring to have a life outside of work, or daring to trust that the company would make good on its word (pensions, ect.)

Yeah, this generation is different... we've got to pick up the tab for the three previous generations, all of which are still kicking around and calling us selfish because we're a little reticent about cleaning up their messes?

You're not dead yet, boomers... clean up your damn mess before you die.

I'm about to graduate in a couple weeks, so I'm really getting a kick...

Blah. The thing I notice about my education and my peers is that nearly all of us were told that we had to pedants and have a set of expertise in some area the moment we all got our degrees to go to work. That's a good thing and what the article is talking about: "Holy crap", says Mr. HR, "We got a grad who knows everything there is to know about [X thing]. What a find!"

The bad part is that not everyone can get a job doing what they were educated to do, so the specialists suffer and the generalists fill all the gaps. Contrasted against that total-score grad you just hired, the other recent grads who applied seem kind of irrelevant and unqualified.

You can't compare degrees of qualification to differing sets of qualifications...why in the hell do we think that every generation is some kind of evolutionary step ahead of the previous one?

we're not more qualified, we're just different, because the world is different. Saying that the kids of today are more qualified to do the jobs of today is mildly retarded.

Of course we're prepared for this world, we were farking raised in it.

Heamer: Not the millenial troll. Ignorance and apathy are our rallying cries, when we feel like it, or even remember. I am but a humble emissary, paid by VerizonTM, McDonald'sTM, and NikeTM to speak on the behalf of those who still haven't mastered fourth-grade English. I am a product of your own failures, old-timers.

Accept it, forums user "bucky katt" has already rated your creativity and called you a troll. You're done in this town. Turn in your posting diaper and alt accounts. Once forums user "bucky catt" rates you a one out of a ten you're just over.

Wait, unless 10 is bad and one is great. We can only guess at forums user "bucky catt"'s ways but his influence has been felt.

Bucky Katt: 1/10. A little too incontinent. Even trolls have to make a point of some kind.

How does it feel to be so humorless and barely literate that everything goes over you head?

bullshiat. I can guarantee you at least 1/4 cheated

Slugs_of_a_banana_nature: It's like anything... there are stellar workers and there are the so-so types. You can't peg any one generation as any one thing... you can't, for example, accuse the boomer generation of spreading STDs like crazy, indulging in way more than they can afford, and foisting the burden on future generations, or accusing the gen Xers of divorcing the second things start to get difficult, tossing their kids into a shuffle between homes, and selfishly expecting the next generation to STFU and deal with it.

I want some articles on what was said of the boomer generation when they were just getting out of coll...err. High school.

I do know one major difference among my Y peer group... most were from broken homes (selfish late boomers and early gen-Xers, maybe?) so have some really old-fashioned views on marriage... mainly because they know exactly what it's like to have your parents bail on you. They also have a view of work that is more "self-centered" simply because they watched their parents and grandparents get shafted left and right for daring to have a life outside of work, or daring to trust that the company would make good on its word (pensions, ect.)

Yeah, this generation is different... we've got to pick up the tab for the three previous generations, all of which are still kicking around and calling us selfish because we're a little reticent about cleaning up their messes?

You're not dead yet, boomers... clean up your damn mess before you die.

Again, I have to call bullshiat on the notion that Gen X got some sort of free ride. It may be because I was born in 76, but I sure haven't gotten any of the benefits the Millenials like to trot out. No free college for my home state, and I get to deal with the mess the Boomers left behind.

More and more, I feel like Gen X is going to end up trapped between the aging Boomers and the Millenials who have never really been told they can't do something. It's a pretty shiatty place to be.

LordZorch: That bunch of illiterate, uneducated slackers? Doubtful...

So very much THIS. Sorry. I, uh, "talked", that's it, to current fraking COLLEGE grads and they are some of the most brainless, deluded bunch of self-congratulatory airheads you'll ever meet.

Cue the current college grads claiming "I, durr, is edumacated! And you is old!"

Oh shiat, I guess I'm farked. I cost more than my peers, at the ripe old age of 27.

Kar98: LordZorch: That bunch of illiterate, uneducated slackers? Doubtful...

So very much THIS. Sorry. I, uh, "talked", that's it, to current fraking COLLEGE grads and they are some of the most brainless, deluded bunch of self-congratulatory airheads you'll ever meet.

Cue the current college grads claiming "I, durr, is edumacated! And you is old!"

I've only taught/dealt with Freshman on any real basis lately. I hoped that at the other end they had more of an education. Sometimes I wonder what I'm getting myself into going into academia.

Wow, this is a fail on epic levels. I'm going for my Masters degree, and I go to school with a lot of these kids. Yeah, the future is screwed. Keep in mind, these are the college kids, not the high school slackers. I can understand how old people have no knowledge of computers and technology, but young kids have no excuse. Kids, iPods, DVR's, and remedial computer skills will not get you hired.

As for the entitled generation, I pity how pussified and weak they are. I was in a statistics class a couple years ago, and the kids were whining about how they couldn't have notes on the final. They wanted at least to know if they could have a list of calculator functions. Cause ding, dang y'all, TI-89's are complicated and stuff. The teacher did nothing to coddle them, and that seemed to send them into epileptic fits. I guess the word "no" is not taught in today's schools. I uttered in "welcome to college kids," which drew death stares. All I can say is this, either these kids toughen up, or the world softens for these losers. I'm hoping anything but the latter.

BlippityBleep: And, as well qualified as this group seems to be, the graduates' appeal also lies in the fact that they'll be paid less than more experienced workers would be.

Um, fark you. How 'bout you pay the employee what they're farking worth you worthless fark. Better employee = more pay? Not in America.


Yeah, why then can't we find anyone who can do even basic, and I mean BASIC mathematics? or have the attention span exceeding that of an ADD jackrabbit?

Everyone wants to fly a desk at some cushy, low physical impact job and nobody wants to ever have to get their hands dirty. We have people in their early 20's apply all the time. When they discover that they wont be making $60 thou a year right out of the gate they walk away.

Its a MACHINE SHOP morans. Nobody, not even the boss makes that kind of money. You have to spend a few years living lean untill you become competant at the trade through experience and time spent doing the scut work. You get your clothes dirty, you are actually physically taxed in the course of your daily work. You might actually have to be aware of where your hands are during the day, the work is dangerous and the foreman doesnt have the time to babysit your ass all day. He might even yell at you when you fark up. You might have to give up texting your girlfreind all day or surfing the internet when you are on company time.

Nobody wants that anymore. Nobody wants to stress their precious little brains learning anything, they all want to sit at a desk with all their cute little bullshiat cubicle toys and never have to perform actual, physical labor.

Thats why industrial buisiness is failing in this country. Nobody wants to pay enough, and nobody wants to spend the time learning the trades through experience rather than just reading some book written by someone whose never actually performed the work for any lengthy period of time.

This country needs competant bricklayers, carpenters, machinists, welders, sheetmetal mechanics, pipelayers, foundrymen. We are not educating the kids to appreciate these trades or even teaching them that these trades even exist. And the country cannot survive without them.

*YAWN*...another generational hate thread...

Of course, the real story is found on page C10 behind the comics: All generations will need to work together to clean up the mess left by the last 8 years' misbehavior.

/Sorry I couldn't be more inflammatory.

and telling classmates how globally oriented and civic-minded JPMorgan seems

Next article.

Deadhouseplants: Wow, this is a fail on epic levels. I'm going for my Masters degree, and I go to school with a lot of these kids. Yeah, the future is screwed. Keep in mind, these are the college kids, not the high school slackers. I can understand how old people have no knowledge of computers and technology, but young kids have no excuse. Kids, iPods, DVR's, and remedial computer skills will not get you hired.

As for the entitled generation, I pity how pussified and weak they are. I was in a statistics class a couple years ago, and the kids were whining about how they couldn't have notes on the final. They wanted at least to know if they could have a list of calculator functions. Cause ding, dang y'all, TI-89's are complicated and stuff. The teacher did nothing to coddle them, and that seemed to send them into epileptic fits. I guess the word "no" is not taught in today's schools. I uttered in "welcome to college kids," which drew death stares. All I can say is this, either these kids toughen up, or the world softens for these losers. I'm hoping anything but the latter.

This is true. This time last year, I was dealing with a student who hadn't shown up for about six weeks of the semester. She claimed illness, and I offered her a chance to make the work up. She didn't show up for the meeting where she was supposed to turn said work in, and sent me an email telling me she'd told her family about me and how grateful they all were that I was giving her a chance.

Her final paper, unsurprisingly, was a piece of crap. She got an F in the class, and emailed me about it. I explained it to her, and her response was that she didn't understand how I could "abandon her in her time of need." My girlfriend had to talk me down before I responded with what I really thought about that bullshiat.

I think these kids don't realize that it's their work that results in the grade, not the professor or teachers whim. But then again, I don't think many of these kids have been held accountable for their work up until the point they entered my class.

It's OK, kiddies. After the plague and the drought and the food riots, I'll show you how to forge a sword blade out of an automobile spring. For a price. Maybe you can figure out how to design a webpage made out of rubble.

Deathfrogg: Yeah, why then can't we find anyone who can do even basic, and I mean BASIC mathematics? or have the attention span exceeding that of an ADD jackrabbit?

Everyone wants to fly a desk at some cushy, low physical impact job and nobody wants to ever have to get their hands dirty. We have people in their early 20's apply all the time. When they discover that they wont be making $60 thou a year right out of the gate they walk away.

Its a MACHINE SHOP morans. Nobody, not even the boss makes that kind of money. You have to spend a few years living lean untill you become competant at the trade through experience and time spent doing the scut work. You get your clothes dirty, you are actually physically taxed in the course of your daily work. You might actually have to be aware of where your hands are during the day, the work is dangerous and the foreman doesnt have the time to babysit your ass all day. He might even yell at you when you fark up. You might have to give up texting your girlfreind all day or surfing the internet when you are on company time.

Nobody wants that anymore. Nobody wants to stress their precious little brains learning anything, they all want to sit at a desk with all their cute little bullshiat cubicle toys and never have to perform actual, physical labor.

Thats why industrial buisiness is failing in this country. Nobody wants to pay enough, and nobody wants to spend the time learning the trades through experience rather than just reading some book written by someone whose never actually performed the work for any lengthy period of time.

This country needs competant bricklayers, carpenters, machinists, welders, sheetmetal mechanics, pipelayers, foundrymen. We are not educating the kids to appreciate these trades or even teaching them that these trades even exist. And the country cannot survive without them.

Are you in this line of work? I would be interested in doing it. I would much rather work with my hands and use my brain than rely 100% on my brain and type shiat in a computer all day.

jso2897: It's OK, kiddies. After the plague and the drought and the food riots, I'll show you how to forge a sword blade out of an automobile spring. For a price. Maybe you can figure out how to design a webpage made out of rubble.

Couldn't you just grind down a leafspring for a scramasax? Or are you going to teach me how to pattern-weld it? If that's the case, then I'll trade my library of castle/fortress construction books for your skills as a weaponsmith.

Boomers will fall back on the Secret Script for protection, a rampart too difficult and terrifying for Millennials to scale, and that Script shall be called English Cursive.

You mean to say that the time I spent paying for earning my creative writing degree was for naught? Say it isn't so, O News Media! After four dark years, a figure--'twas me, brethren!--emerged from the wreckage of the California school system, chin held high, fists clenched, ready to don a necktie and fashionably pleated Braggi slacks (on sale at Mervyn's) and contribute to the wealth and future prosperity of this great nation.

Am I not capable?!
Am I not willing?!
Am I not ready to slacken my anal sphincter to allow The Man the pleasure of gracing my lower colon with his Econo-cock?!

Save your malice and lies for the X-ers, the Y-ers, and whatever other letters come after those. I am a Millenial, old-timers. I am here, I will persevere, and I will pay, out of my own pocket no less, with money that I earned, for my 22" rims.

Doubters be warned: the Millenials breathe upon your neck the hot, fetid breath of progress*.

*when applicable, at participating locations only, for a limited time, do not agitate, dry-clean only

I can prove this is not the case. Who invented internet pr0n? It wasnt the generation just graduating (although they probably did help its market uptake).

So neener neener

I'd sure like some of the success those grads are having in getting a job. Most of what I hear is, sure we'll hire new college grads, so long as they have 10 years of COBOL experience under their belts.....

matrygg: Sometimes I wonder what I'm getting myself into going into academia.

Leave now. Tenure is dying or dead, and that was one of the reasons to go into academia that outweighed the negatives..

/a refugee from academia

Why aint these youngin's in cages like they ought to be?