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(UPI) Obvious Jimmy Buffett still relishes coasting on his 70s hits   (upi.com) divider line 106
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strangeguitar 2008-06-06 02:46:00 PM  
I went to a Buffet concert a few years back and was honestly almost bored to tears.

 
Brad_Will [recently expired TotalFark] 2008-06-06 02:58:02 PM  
I like his concerts. They're pretty slow-paced, but his music is enjoyable so it's cool. We're going to tomorrow's concert a little early (though not early enough thanks to wifey wanting to go to mass at 5:30) to knock back a few. That seems to be the main focus of the concerts, anyway.

 
adiabat [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 02:58:10 PM  
strangeguitar: I went to a Buffet concert a few years back and was honestly almost bored to tears.


Then you weren't drinking NEARLY enough.

 
EvilEgg [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 02:59:18 PM  
If I could hang out on a 100' sail boat, smoke weed, and bang hot chicks all based on work I did 30 years ago, I'd be pretty happy too.

 
Confabulat [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 03:05:02 PM  
As someone who has worked in many Florida beach bars in my life, I can safely say that "Margaritaville" makes me want to shoot myself in the head after cutting myself first.

 
Kaiser Chieftess 2008-06-06 03:05:37 PM  
Going to Tuesday's show--will start tailgating about 5 hours early.

It's not just a concert, it's an event. Bash it if you want, but it's a pretty good time.

 
pandabear [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 03:15:59 PM  
EvilEgg: If I could hang out on a 100' sail boat, smoke weed, and bang hot chicks all based on work I did 30 years ago, I'd be pretty happy too.

You forgot having a cool old restored seaplane, too.

Now, you haters, shovel your pickup full of sand, get a 12 V blender and a shiatload of rum, and show up the show early if you want to understand.

 
Frank N Stein 2008-06-06 03:18:57 PM  
www.buffettworld.com
AIDS burger in paradise!

 
cK-MidnightFreak [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 03:23:00 PM  
Been to many shows of his, and am going to the alpine Valley show in July. It is truly an event. No other concert has the kind of tailgating that a Buffett show has.

 
The Onanist [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 03:25:24 PM  
adiabat: Then you weren't drinking NEARLY enough.

THIS.

Kaiser Chieftess: Going to Tuesday's show--will start tailgating about 5 hours early.

It's not just a concert, it's an event. Bash it if you want, but it's a pretty good time.


THIS.

pandabear: Now, you haters, shovel your pickup full of sand, get a 12 V blender and a shiatload of rum, and show up the show early if you want to understand.

And THIS.

/I am pretty sure I am the reason they instituted the "No Camelbacks" rule at Alpine Valley. I wore over 1/2 gallon of margaritas on my back over 10 years ago. Now we just do the "party bus" - No DUIs after the concert.

 
Confabulat [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 03:26:26 PM  
Look, you fans, Buffett is horrible. He's always been horrible. He's a parody.

And his fans are parodies of a parody.

You embarrass us real drunk bum Floridians with your shenanigans.

 
strangeguitar 2008-06-06 03:26:38 PM  
Frank N Stein: AIDS burger in paradise!

Nice.

 
The Onanist [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 03:26:49 PM  
cK-MidnightFreak: Been to many shows of his, and am going to the alpine Valley show in July.

I was there last year and bought my ticket 5 minutes before the show below face value. I didn't really care if I went into the show or not.

:D

 
The Onanist [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 03:27:36 PM  
Confabulat: You embarrass us real drunk bum Floridians with your shenanigans.

Point taken.

 
Confabulat [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 03:29:10 PM  
To be fair, I do like "A Pirate Looks at 40."

/sheds quiet tear

 
PainInTheASP [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 03:57:56 PM  
Buffett is not a musician, Buffett is a frame of mind.

 
BKITU [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 03:59:12 PM  
Confabulat: To be fair, I do like "A Pirate Looks at 40."

/sheds quiet tear


Yes, I am a pirate
200 years too late
The cannons don't thunder
There's nothing to plunder
I'm an over-40 victim of fate
Arriving too late
Arriving too late

/ninjas go to hell!

 
homerdrew415 2008-06-06 04:02:30 PM  
Jimmy Buffett music is for drunk southern chicks and fratboys!

/Cartman is mostly wrong, but every now and again a blind squirrel finds a nut

 
BKITU [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 04:05:14 PM  
homerdrew415: Jimmy Buffett music is for drunk southern chicks and fratboys!

... or guys who want to nail drunk southern chicks.

*WHAP* Ow!

Wanted. Wanted to nail drunk southern chicks. Before we got married.

/sorry honey....

 
homerdrew415 2008-06-06 04:07:16 PM  
BKITU: homerdrew415: Jimmy Buffett music is for drunk southern chicks and fratboys!

... or guys who want to nail drunk southern chicks.

*WHAP* Ow!

Wanted. Wanted to nail drunk southern chicks. Before we got married.

/sorry honey....


I always wondered how Nascar drivers were conceived. Alright back to your left turns!

/Ducks..

 
hubiestubert [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 04:08:33 PM  
The way I look at it: how many other artists have been putting touring as long as Buffett? And touring with a new album just about each go around?

List of tours

* 1976: A Pink Crustacean Tour
* 1978: Cheeseburger in Paradise Tour
* 1979: You Had to Be There / Volcano Tour
* 1980: Coconut Telegraph Tour
* 1980: Homecoming Tour
* 1984: Feeding Frenzy Tour
* 1985: Last Mango in Paris Tour
* 1986: World Tour of Florida
* 1987: A Pirate Looks At Forty Tour
* 1988: Cheap Vacation Tour
* 1988: Hot Water Tour
* 1989: Off To See The Lizard Tour
* 1990: Jimmy's Jump Up Tour
* 1991: Outpost Tour
* 1992: Rece$$ion Rece$$ Tour
* 1993: Chameleon Caravan Tour
* 1994: Fruitcakes Tour
* 1995: Domino College Tour
* 1996: Banana Wind Tour
* 1997: Havana Daydreamin' Tour
* 1998: Don't Stop The Carnival Tour
* 1999: Beach House On The Moon Tour
* 2000: Tuesdays, Thursdays, Saturdays Tour
* 2001: A Beach Odyssey Tour
* 2002: Far Side of the World Tour
* 2003: Tiki Time Tour
* 2004: License To Chill Tour
* 2005: A Salty Piece Of Land Tour
* 2006: Party At The End Of The World Tour
* 2007: Bama Breeze Tour
* 2008: Year of Still Here Tour

That's a lot of milage, and a lot of albums:

1970 Down to Earth
1971 High Cumberland Jubilee
1973 A White Sport Coat and a Pink Crustacean
1974 Living & Dying in 3/4 Time
1974 A1A
1975 Rancho Deluxe Soundtrack
1976 Havana Daydreamin'
1977 Changes in Latitudes, Changes in Attitudes
1978 Son of a Son of a Sailor
1978 You Had to Be There
1979 Volcano
1981 Coconut Telegraph
1981 Somewhere over China
1983 One Particular Harbour
1984 Riddles in the Sand
1985 Last Mango in Paris
1985 Songs You Know by Heart
1986 Floridays
1988 Hot Water
1989 Off To See The Lizard
1990 Feeding Frenzy
1992 Boats, Beaches, Bars & Ballads
1993 Before the Beach
1993 Margaritaville Cafe: Late Night Menu
1994 Fruitcakes
1995 Margaritaville Cafe: Late Night Gumbo
1995 Barometer Soup
1996 Banana Wind
1996 Christmas Island
1998 Biloxi
1998 Don't Stop the Carnival
1998 American Storyteller
1998 A Pirates Treasure
1999 Beach House on the Moon
1999 Calaloo
1999 There's Nothing Soft about Hard Times
1999 Buffett Live: Tuesdays, Thursdays, Saturdays
2002 Far Side of the World
2003 Meet Me In Margaritaville: The Ultimate Collection
2003 Live in Auburn, WA
2003 Live in Las Vegas, NV
2003 Live in Mansfield, MA
2003 Live in Cincinnati, OH
2004 License to Chill
2005 Live in Hawaii
2005 Live at Fenway Park
2005 Now Yer Squawkin'
2006 Hoot Soundtrack
2006 Take The Weather with You
2007 Live at Texas Stadium
2007 Live in Anguilla

 
homerdrew415 2008-06-06 04:14:44 PM  
hubiestubert: The way I look at it: how many other artists have been putting touring as long as Buffett? And touring with a new album just about each go around?

List of tours

*blah blah blah


Quantity is not a measure of quality...For reference, see McDonalds

 
BKITU [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 04:17:15 PM  
homerdrew415: Quantity is not a measure of quality...For reference, see McDonalds

But... the quality has to be just good enough to keep people coming back. You're right, though. Jimmy Buffett is the musical equivalent of eating a Big Mac and fries at a Hawaiian luau.

Or, a cheeseburger in paradise, as it were.

 
GurneyHalleck [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 04:26:30 PM  
I went last year for the first time and the only thing that saved the entire day was a guy who offered us jello shots and Toots and the Maytalls as the opening band. Buffet sucked out loud despite the dozen people he had behind him. We left at the set break and beat the drunks.

Why couldn't the universe have taken Buffet instead of Jerry?

 
homerdrew415 2008-06-06 04:26:30 PM  
BKITU: homerdrew415: Quantity is not a measure of quality...For reference, see McDonalds

But... the quality has to be just good enough to keep people coming back. You're right, though. Jimmy Buffett is the musical equivalent of eating a Big Mac and fries at a Hawaiian luau.

Or, a cheeseburger in paradise, as it were.


Basically if you're drunk or stoned, you'll enjoy it. Anything resembling sobriety, and you're going to wish you could gouge out your own eyes to be skull farked to avoid it...

 
homerdrew415 2008-06-06 04:27:41 PM  
GurneyHalleck: I went last year for the first time and the only thing that saved the entire day was a guy who offered us jello shots and Toots and the Maytalls as the opening band. Buffet sucked out loud despite the dozen people he had behind him. We left at the set break and beat the drunks.

Why couldn't the universe have taken Buffet instead of Jerry?


Then we wouldn't have had Jim Brewer saving the day in half baked...

 
reelpirate [recently expired TotalFark] 2008-06-06 04:32:10 PM  
Arrgghhhh......

 
BobtheFascist 2008-06-06 04:56:44 PM  
Hell of a gig if you can get it.

 
tallguywithglasseson [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 05:31:48 PM  
strangeguitar: I went to a Buffet concert a few years back and was honestly almost bored to tears.

I've been to quite a few and honestly can't remember the actual concert part of most of them. Something about "shaker of salt".

Fun part was in the parking lot of the Alpine Valley venue (near Milwaukee). We filled up a charter bus a few times, usually got there at 2:00 or 3:00 PM for the 7:00 (or 8:00?) show.

Good times.

 
Solid State Vittles 2008-06-06 05:41:47 PM  
I'm not sure I'd go to a Jimmy Buffett concert if I had free front row tickets, but I won't rain on someone else's parade. If you guys dig it, diiiiig it.

 
tallguywithglasseson [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 05:42:29 PM  
Almost forgot to mention:

I went to a Buffett show in North Carolina. I went to the men's room and was surprised to see a woman (short hair, medium build, maybe mid twenties to early thirties) in line in front of me for the urinal.

At first I figured she was just waiting for a stall to open up and was in there because the ladies room had too long of a line. However she didn't seem to move towards the stalls at all - then I noticed a somewhat young kid was in line in front of her. Now I guess that kid was certainly old enough to be in there by himself, and usually the woman takes the young kid into the ladies room not the other way around, but again I figured maybe the kid had an emergency and couldn't wait for the ladies. Maybe I just didn't see it coming because I was too drunk myself.

In any case, I was unprepared for what happened next. The kid gets done and leaves, she steps up to the urinal, drops her shorts all the way down to her ankles, then drops her panties down to about mid thigh, stands bare-assed over the urinal, and lets fly. Everywhere. Pisses on her panties which were almost soaked, on her shorts, in her sock, on her shoes, all over the floor, and maybe also got a little into the urinal.

Then, almost as gross, just pulls up her piss-filled panties and shorts, and walks out.

I was speechless.

/Fruitcakes, indeed
//probably told that story in a Buffett thread before
///probably will again

 
DAR [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 05:42:48 PM  
cK-MidnightFreak: am going to the alpine Valley show in July.

I'll be seeing you there then. I just found a hand-cranked blender for the event. Seen a gas powered one also but it was over $200.00 so thats out.

 
pandabear [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 05:46:40 PM  
DAR: I'll be seeing you there then. I just found a hand-cranked blender for the event. Seen a gas powered one also but it was over $200.00 so thats out.

Go to the marine store/chandlery. They'll have one that fits in your cigarette lighter plug. Probably under $50. I've got one on my boat.

/Real Buffet fans are sailors (wind type), and spend time in those places.

 
DAR [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 05:51:55 PM  
pandabear: Real Buffet fans are sailors (wind type), and spend time in those places.

Well don't about all that but after 20 years sailing the islands on warships, I'd says that makes me a Real Buffet fan.

 
Solid State Vittles 2008-06-06 05:51:59 PM  
tallguywithglasseson: I was speechless.

Gah!

 
SniffSharpies [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 05:52:21 PM  
(screaming and pulling my hair out in horror)

Wouldn't be so bad if they didn't crank out his music from almost every bar in town 24/7.

Even the locals need a break.

 
Solid State Vittles 2008-06-06 06:02:13 PM  
I remember waiting for someone at Margaritaville on the Strip in Vegas. I started chatting with one of the bartenders. I asked him if he ever got sick of hearing Jimmy Buffett songs, he said very calmly that it's all he can do not to kill himself whenever he hears Jimmy Buffett played outside of work.

 
theurge14 2008-06-06 06:38:16 PM  
tallguywithglasseson: In any case, I was unprepared for what happened next. The kid gets done and leaves, she steps up to the urinal, drops her shorts all the way down to her ankles, then drops her panties down to about mid thigh, stands bare-assed over the urinal, and lets fly. Everywhere. Pisses on her panties which were almost soaked, on her shorts, in her sock, on her shoes, all over the floor, and maybe also got a little into the urinal.

Then, almost as gross, just pulls up her piss-filled panties and shorts, and walks out.


Fap fap fap fap fap....

 
Farkomatic 2008-06-06 06:42:13 PM  
I'm not much of a Buffett fan, but when you're fully baked pounding down massive quantities of beer, his shows are a pretty good time.

 
DFWPhotoGuy 2008-06-06 06:44:04 PM  
Leaving for the keys for two weeks next Friday. I plan on drinking like a fish. He apparently shows up all the time. Key West for the win!

/getting a mohawk tomorrow
//dying it electric blue on wednesday
///ready for square grouper

 
jj325 [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 06:46:28 PM  
Hits???

 
kellyshannon 2008-06-06 06:48:48 PM  
Took my very frist cruise in February to the Mexican Riviera. It was farking awesome. Then on one of our sea-days I went to lay out on the deck with a book and a fruity drink, which was terrible. The drink, not the book ("The Mother Tongue" by Bill Bryson, on my second reading of it). The band starts up on its platform over the pool, and in the middle of the four hot tubs flanking it. It's a shiatty electro-caribbean tribute band. They start in on their first song: the obligatory "Margaritaville." The singer is very large and very black. At the appropriate point in the song (but really, is there ever an "appropriate" point in that song?) he chants "Salt. Salt. Where's my salt?" I wanted to pierce my eardrums with the pointy end of the drink umbrella.

/subby.

 
riknight 2008-06-06 07:04:08 PM  
for the buffet haters it all boils down to he has fame, fun and knows how to keeps his fans

 
fenianfark 2008-06-06 07:11:11 PM  
Confabulat: As someone who has worked in many Florida beach bars in my life, I can safely say that "Margaritaville" makes me want to shoot myself in the head after cutting myself first.

I think you mean Pinacoladaburg.

/Obscure?

 
pfelon 2008-06-06 07:19:02 PM  
Nobody likes Jimmy Buffett except for frat boys and alcoholic chicks from the south!

i124.photobucket.com

Fark you Jimmy Buffett!

/He sucks.
//I'm sure.
///I'm not just sure... I'm HIV positive.

 
Pucca 2008-06-06 07:19:24 PM  
BobtheFascist 2008-06-06 04:56:44 PM
Hell of a gig if you can get it.

Ok seriously, what exactly do I not get? It's just a bunch of drunks and pot heads getting together right? I can do that at home.

 
Fox_MacGyver 2008-06-06 07:20:26 PM  
If you actually remember going to a Buffett concert, you obviously did not tailgate properly.

Luckily, my friend finds the soundboard recording online the next day and burns it for it. Kinda fun going "ohh, I don't remember most of this..."

I'll be at the Labor Day weekend show.

 
luckybastard 2008-06-06 07:22:30 PM  
I fire up the ol' 'Songs You Know By Heart' whenever I want to escape the day-to-day shiat of life.

 
BKITU [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 07:23:26 PM  
Pucca: Ok seriously, what exactly do I not get? It's just a bunch of drunks and pot heads getting together right? I can do that at home.

Do they pay you $30-$130 per seat to show up?

 
IMDWalrus [TotalFark] 2008-06-06 07:27:11 PM  
The extent of my Buffet knowledge stems from a greatest hits CD that's somewhere in my dad's collection, and that's probably about as much as I'll ever know about the guy.

jj325: Hits???

If nothing else, you've got to give him Margaritaville and Cheeseburger In Paradise. That's two.

Pucca: BobtheFascist 2008-06-06 04:56:44 PM
Hell of a gig if you can get it.

Ok seriously, what exactly do I not get? It's just a bunch of drunks and pot heads getting together right? I can do that at home.


Yes, but you wouldn't get paid thousands of dollars a night to do it.

 
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